Chapter 6

Rossi vowed on his way home to call Hotch's doctor the next day. If the headaches were making him 'mean Hotch' then he wouldn't stop until Hotch had something that worked. If this is temporary, please God, let it end sooner rather than later.

After talking to the doctor, Rossi had a new medicine to pick up for Hotch. The team was disappointed when Rossi said Hotch didn't want them to come over yet, but Rossi assured them that once Hotch got things straightened out, Rossi would tell them. Rossi knew they were all worried about Hotch, he was, too, but he couldn't push too hard yet because he was afraid of him shutting him out completely.

Rossi had also talked to Jessica and she agreed to keep Jack until Rossi decided it would be alright for him to go home. That thought scared Rossi. He would have never have thought that he would ever have to worry about Jack being around Hotch, and it made his guilt over the whole thing become even worse.

XXX

Rossi was floored when he showed up that evening and Hotch was sitting on the couch in the same place as when Rossi had left the night before. He realized Hotch hadn't even changed his clothes from the day before. He didn't think Hotch had even been asleep. He even wondered if Hotch had even moved from the spot. "Hotch?" Rossi asked as he went into the living room.

"What?" Hotch asked without even looking at him.

"What are you doing?" The TV wasn't on and neither was the radio.

"Thinking."

"About what?"

"Nothing. Everything."

Rossi sat down in the chair opposite the couch. "Have you been there since last night?"

"Yep."

"You're not tired?"

"I slept off and on."

"Why didn't you go to bed?"

"Didn't feel like it."

Rossi swallowed hard. Hotch wasn't exactly being mean, but his detached behavior was scary, too. "Is your head hurting?"

"Yes."

"Your doctor had me pick you up something new. You want to try it?"

"I don't care."

Rossi got up and got the pills and a glass of water. On his way back into the living room, Rossi noticed that Hotch's bottle of scotch was empty. He sighed deeply. He didn't think Hotch was drunk, but he wasn't sure he would know anymore. He handed Hotch the pills and the water.

Hotch took it and set the glass down on the coffee table. "Happy now?"

That stung. "Yes."

Hotch sighed heavily. "Why are you here, Dave?"

"I'm worried about you, Aaron. I think after as long as we've known each other I deserve that right."

"You just going to set there and watch me sit here?"

"No. I'd like to see you actually get up and do something."

"Like what?"

"Oh, I don't know, maybe eat something, watch TV, go to bed, anything besides just sitting here in the silence."

Hotch reached out, grabbed the remote, and turned the TV on.

Rossi was sure Hotch wanted to say 'happy now' again. "Aaron, talk to me."

"Make up your mind. Do you want to talk or do you want to watch TV?"

Rossi took a deep breath. He doesn't realize how big of an ass he's being. Just let it slide. When Rossi didn't answer him, Hotch gave him a look that said 'well?', and that did it. "I don't want to do either one. I want you to want to do it."

"Maybe I don't want to do anything. Ever consider that?"

"Why?"

Hotch just shook his head. "Fine! You want me to go to fucking bed? Fine! I'll fucking go to bed!" Hotch yelled and stormed down the hallway and slammed his bedroom door.

A tear escaped Rossi's eye as he watched his best friend become a man he didn't know. He sighed heavily and got up to go get his go bag out of his car. He was not about to let Hotch stay alone again after that.

XXX

Rossi woke up to sounds in the kitchen. He got up and realized that Hotch had showered, shaved, and actually looked decent. "Coffee?" Hotch asked as he grabbed a mug out of the cabinet.

"Please. How's the headache?"

"Not bad. How's the back?" Rossi gave him a puzzled look. "I have slept on that couch a few times, Dave."

Rossi smiled. "It was alright." Hotch handed him the mug, and Rossi accepted it with another smile.

"What?"

"What?"

"Why do you keep looking at me like that?"

"Sorry, I didn't know I was looking at you a certain way. Damn, Aaron, I just woke up," Rossi tried to cover.

Hotch eyed him warily, but took his coffee and went and sat the table. Rossi followed him. Since he seemed to be in a decent mood, Rossi decided to take advantage of it. "How long do you think you'll need before you come back to work?"

Hotch looked at his watch, and Rossi knew he was checking to see what day it was. "I would hope to be back Monday."

Five days. "What do you have to do to be cleared to work?"

"I haven't check yet, but I'm sure it will require the doctor's approval. I'll have to call Strauss."

Rossi nodded. "You call Jessica yet?"

"Not yet. I figured I better give myself another day to make sure I'm ready for Jack."

Rossi nodded again. This is the Aaron I know. "What are your plans for today?"

"I'm going to go for a walk to try and judge where I am physically, first."

"Sounds good. Have you taken your pills this morning?"

"Yes, Dave. It says every eight hours."

Rossi smiled. Maybe it is just the headaches. "Did the doctor say when he thought the headaches would go away?"

"He said there was no way to tell. I could have them for the rest of my life."

"Hotch, I am so sorry." Rossi started to break down. "If you hadn't been so concerned about getting me out of that damn container, you wouldn't have been hurt." Rossi told him as his eyes watered up.

"You don't know that. That was Thompson's fault, not yours. Damn, Dave, if all I have to worry about is a headache or taking a pill, then I consider myself lucky. It could have been a lot worse."

"I guess."

"And you can stop blaming yourself. Guilt doesn't do anyone any good."

XXX

That night and the next day found Hotch to still be in decent mood; not quite the same old Hotch, but as close as he had been since the explosion. Rossi asked him if the team could come over as he said yes. Rossi noticed that Hotch seemed a little more reserved around them. He also noticed Hotch studying them, and Rossi had to again wonder if Hotch was just profiling everyone around him and masking the way he really felt. Rossi shook his head. How can you even think that? Because old Aaron wouldn't have to profile his friends, he would just be normal. He wasn't what normal was for Hotch anymore.

He was glad that he hadn't seen the stare for over 24 hours, though, and he decided that he would be happy with what he got. This Hotch was at least a thousand times better than mean Hotch. Rossi also knew the team sensed a change in Hotch, but they were covering decently. The evening came and went without any problems, and Rossi called Jessica and told her Jack could come home the next day after school. Rossi promised to check in on them.

Rossi stopped by after work the next day and found Hotch and Jack doing fine. "How's it going?" Rossi asked him.

Hotch looked up from the file he had been reading, apparently he had been to the BAU. Rossi was surprised he hadn't seen him there. "Fine."

"What did you find out from Strauss?" Rossi asked as he joined Hotch at the table.

"That I need to pass a physical."

"That should be easy enough, don't you think?"

"Yes, I actually made two miles on my run this morning."

Rossi raised his brows in surprise. "Damn, that's great, Hotch."

"It's a start."

"So you think you'll be back on Monday?"

"If I can get in to get my physical tomorrow, yes."

"The team got a case this morning."

"And yet, you are here."

Oops, apparently Hotch didn't like that. "I talked with Strauss."

"I know. I assured her that you would also be back to work in full capacity Monday."

"Yep."

Hotch shut the file he was looking at and fixed Rossi with the stare. Shit! "I don't need a babysitter, Dave."

"I never said you did."

"And yet, you are here," Hotch told him again.

"What? Can't a guy stop by and visit a friend?"

Hotch eyed him a little more, but he finally relaxed his gaze and looked away. Rossi let out the breath he'd been holding.

"It's bed time, Jack." Hotch told him. Jack put up the book he'd been reading and went to his room to get ready.

Rossi wasn't sure, but he didn't think Jack looked quite right. "I'm gonna tell him goodnight," Rossi told Hotch and went to Jack's room. "How's it going?"

Jack sat on his bed and looked at Rossi. "It's ok, I guess."

"Just ok?"

"Yeah. Daddy seems different."

Rossi sat down next to him and put his arm around the boy he thought of as a grandson. "What do you mean?"

"He hasn't called me Buddy since he's woke up, and he's just. . . different."

"Has he scared you?"

"No."

"Tell you what, Buddy. Give Daddy a little more time; he'll came around."

Rossi could tell by Jack look that he wasn't sure whether to believe him or not. "Ok, Uncle Dave."

"You call me any time you need me, even if you just want to talk or want to say goodnight, anything."

"Ok."

"You know my number, right?"

Jack recited it to him with a smile.

"That's right. Give your Uncle Dave a hug." Jack embraced him and then Rossi got up to let him get in bed. "I'll tell Daddy you're ready."

"Ok, goodnight."

"Goodnight, Buddy."

Rossi went out and Hotch went in and then joined Rossi at the table again. Rossi could tell Hotch wasn't in a talkative mood, so he sighed and told him goodnight, too, and left.