Joey pushed some buttons on the computer and fed some more live action scenes of Ross doing his thing in the bedroom. Close up, zooms, all caught in ultraHD.
While all this was happening the Filipino chacha that Monica had ordered in was currently receiving instructions. In the broom cupboard in which she was held there was a silenced Colt .45 amongst all the cleaning materials. It was her job to shoot Monica later on. The instructions she was receiving came from Joey, who was paying her a cool ten billion dollars for the hit. It would be live streamed later on all the TV channels around the world. Joey would have cared about the ramifications of this whole ordeal had he not been a has-been celebrity. Little did he know of what would happen after the episode when all their corpses would be found.
Meanwhile, Rachel was in the powder room again, reapplying her make up; she had let out a few tears at being humiliated in front of Monica, but she would get her revenge. She couldn't piece together how her dress had come apart. It had cost her ten grand and was guaranteed not to do that at spontaneous moments. Anyway, she would not let it bother her too much as everyone had already seen her naked after being caught a million times with some guy she had picked up at the coffee shop many moons ago when they were all friends and had happy occasions. But those men were gone now. So were the good times. And so would be the Friends.
Monica was in the kitchen laughing to herself at she stirred those vegetables and began cooking some more. It was time to cut the meat to fry. This episode was titled The One with the Cannibalism for reasons which will be explained later in the story. As she cut the meat, she was so happy with glee at seeing Rachel humiliated that she was not paying attention; she had cut her finger. This was later deemed a low point of the episode as blood was rarely seen on prime time TV. Nor did they know till later that Monica had been given AIDS by Joey deliberately for one of the scenes.
Phoebe and Chandler meanwhile were sitting on the sofa in awkward silence. All Chandler could remember was the taste. And that he still had cocaine in his pocket.
"Phoebe, fancy a esnifar?" He asked her. She knew what that meant as she had fooled around with many Latinos.
"In the living room? Monica is cooking over there you idiot." She whispered. But she was tempted, too. She was on a downer now after all the bong hits and could do with an upper.
"Fuck!" Came a loud screech from the kitchen, as if a harpy demon lay dying. It was Monica. They thought she had stepped in dog shit again but it seemed she had cut her finger using a huge meat cutting knife. It was almost completely off.
Phoebe rushed over to her whilst Chandler took the opportunity to snort some cocaine out of a tube. It was a small tube but enough the last the evening. Joey was streaming all of this on YouTube at the same time.
"Monica! You almost cut your finger off!" Phoebe laughed. Streams of laughter came from Ross' bedroom from a sitcom as he lay cleaning himself up. It was timed perfectly with the situation.
Phoebe desperately looks for bandages but can't find them so gives of a witty quip - laughter in the background.
Chandler dances around sarcastically in the background trying to avoid his ex wife who would inevitably blame him for cutting herself - laughter in the background.
Monica screaming and trying to sew her finger back on - laughter in the background.
Luckily she had found a sewing kit nearby and sewn what was left of her finger together. She didn't feel the pain so much as just deal with it, as she had already played around with torture sex with Chandler and was already dead to pain. To the audience they assumed it just didn't hurt because it was fake. The whole audience were in a state of disbelief anyway at seeing some of the shocking content of the episode.
"Are you okay, Monica?" Phoebe asked Monica, rather a little afraid at laughing at her before.
"I'll be fucking fine." She spat. Eyeing the meat. She would have to wash the meat again now and dry it off.
"Ross!" She screamed, "start peeling some garlic, you moron!" Screeching as she made her way to the human flesh which had been found by Joey and replaced by him for the episode, she began to wash it under water. Now all the meat was contaminated. Meanwhile, Joey was ready for dramatic scene number two. It was blackmail time. He could spoof any of their numbers. And had access to all their blackmail material as he was a master hacker.
Ding! Went Rachel's phone. It was a message from Rachel. It was a photo of Rachel naked that Monica had seemingly sent her with a message saying "I sent this too the paparazzi." It was her kneeling down just a while ago as she tried to light a cigarette on Monica's dogshitfromearliershoecovered jacket. Red veins pulsated in Rachel's forehead, ready to explode at any moment. So the bitch had taken a photo of her. She could see nothing but red rage. She really shouldn't have shot up before coming. It was time to beat Monica to a pulp.