If there was one word to sum up her life, it had to be tumultuous.
The life of a shinobi was never easy, requiring hard work and dedication, something she had decidedly lacked in her earliest years. It was only after nearly losing not only her life, but the life of her teammates that she finally opened her eyes to the severity of her profession. From then on, her time was spent training until she couldn't move, reading until her head hit the pillow, and completing mission after mission, forcing herself to surpass her body's limitations. Her life only seemed to improve after Tsunade took pity on her, guiding her albeit more aggressively than perhaps necessary, but nevertheless boosting not only her taijutsu and medical ninjutsu prowess, but even going as far as passing along her most secret and well-kept jutsu: the one hundred healing mark, the ultimate jutsu that took three years of her life to acquire. It was wonderful, the very first time she activated the seal. At long last, she was able to stand on her own two feet, no longer the weak little girl that needed protecting, and boy did it feel good. From that day forward, she vowed never to revert back to that weak little girl. She would be strong, for her village but also for herself.
And yet here she was, a shell of her former self, completely and utterly broken beyond belief.
Maybe she deserved it? Her vanity and naivety cost her precious time, time better spent honing her skills, and perhaps she could have stopped Sasuke that day all those years ago had she but the foresight. Instead of offering her heart, she could have offered her strength, though at the time that wouldn't have meant much. Had she been stronger maybe she could have forced him to stay, perhaps ended the path of vengeance before it had even begun, though she knew this to be moot. Sasuke would have overpowered her with ease with merely a genjutsu had she tried to act.
Perhaps there was nothing she could have ever said or done. Sasuke was bound by the death of his clan, a cursed fate between brothers that even she had been helpless to prevent. She cursed Danzo with such animosity that had the man been alive he would've withered on the spot. If he hadn't forced Itachi that night so many years ago, maybe then they could have grown up happily. Sasuke would have had a healthy home, a loving family instead of a broken dream and visions of slaughter, or a hatred so consuming that he betrayed his village and attempted to erase the leaf from existence. He would have never had to atone for his crimes, he would have never left on the journey for redemption, would have never met the grisly end that awaited him.
These thoughts were pointless, a self-inflicting torture she couldn't break, but the melancholy she felt had been increasingly difficult to ignore, festering in her mind as she replayed the image of his lifeless corpse over and over. Never again would he open those haunting ebony orbs that plagued her every waking moment. The gentle touch of a callused hand upon her brow, the softly murmured 'hn's that he was so well known for, even the soft tenor of his voice brought tears to her flooded eyes. No, for all he had been in life would no longer hold in death, a fact that she pointedly ignored, allowing herself to fall into delusions of memories not yet created; never to be fulfilled.
Her heart broke everyday, the knowledge that his life had been erased a bitter memory that she chose to repress, lest she end up where she was now.
A large hand brushing across her back soothed a small ache in her heart, the tender caress a juxtaposition of the strong embrace she was entangled in, although she relaxed in his hold ever so slightly as the seconds ticked on. By no means was she happy to have broken down in front of this man, but she would admit that his declaration from earlier and the tender way he held her eased some of her sorrow. The burden of carrying Sasuke's death may very well haunt her forever, but at this moment with this quiet shinobi brushing a soothing hand down her locks, she truly felt comforted for the first time in months.
Time had passed by without much notice, the once predominant wails dying down to sniffles and the odd cough, her voice hoarse from overuse, though his hands never stopped the rhythmic petting of her hair. Unsurprisingly, eyelids drooping, Sakura found herself being lifted, the action forcing her hold on his neck to tighten. Strong arms lifted her with ease despite her weak protests and carried her safely to the disheveled remains of her bedroom. If Shino had been shocked by the state her room had been in he didn't show it, merely maneuvering past the floor with ease until he deposited her gently on her bed. Her back met with the plush of her mattress, the familiar softness of her blanket settling across her chest snapping her back to reality. Pink lashes fluttered softly as she gazed up at the stoic shinobi, noticing his lips part briefly as he mumbled something to a tiny winged insect perched atop his finger.
"What are.." she tried to speak, but soon dissolved into a fit of coughs, her throat raw from her earlier hysterics.
A warm hand rest on her crown briefly, the tiny bug coming to sit atop her shoulder, flapping its wings in a rhythmic motion, the vibrations and humming helping to lure her further to sleep, much to her embarrassment. Try as she might, the soothing touch of his palm accompanied by the musical notes from his kikaichu lulled the kunoichi into an ever elusive deep sleep.
~oOo~
There was no telling how long she'd been out, but all too soon the kunoichi found herself awake and restless, a dull pounding in her skull accompanied by the sting of raw skin underneath her eyes. Sakura rubbed at her eyes gently, sending a small surge of healing chakra to soothe the irritated skin underneath. She took a few short breaths, shifting in the bed until her back connected to the smooth wood of her headboard, a hand smoothing tangled locks as she forced herself to rise.
As viridian eyes slowly blinked into focus, she couldn't help the startled intake of breath as she took in her surroundings. It was gone, all of her disorganization, the clutter, the trash, everything!
Eyes nearly bugging out at this point, she toppled over the side of her bed to see the familiar cherry wood flooring shining as if it hadn't been buried underneath nearly thirty layers of filth. A horrified shriek reverberated through the home as she looked upon her dresser to find that not only had her guest cleaned her abode, but had also taken it upon himself to wash and fold her laundry, as so clearly displayed by the piles of clothes. Atop the neatly folded pile sat a familiar pair of racy red underwear, the sight making her flush with embarrassment.
Her face awash with crimson the likes of which she had probably never achieved, she stumbled out of her room to find an indifferent Shino stirring something on the stove. Though she had come into the kitchen to fuss at the infamous bug nin in her home, Sakura caught a rare glimpse of said shinobi displaying far more skin than he had ever previously done before. Try as she might, Sakura stopped to stare at the broad expanse of back he had so generously left on display. Gone was his long trench coat, instead a simple mesh shirt covered his lean frame, showing off the rigid planes of his shoulder blades, the lithe figure he often kept concealed.
Surely he had no business being this toned and defined. Yes, shinobi underwent rigorous training, honing their bodies into weapons, working towards peak physical shape, but who would have guessed that Shino Aburame, bug master extraordinaire would be so ripped? Lean, sleek muscle stretched effortlessly as he stirred what she assumed to be some sort of stew judging by the smell, the muscles in his back stretching almost teasingly. Pale, smooth skin stretched taut across chiseled muscle as he worked, the visual both tantalizing and incredibly unwelcome.
"I-You-What..?" She screeched, absolutely taken aback at the sight of him casually cooking in her home as if he belonged there. Effortlessly, he set aside the spoon and turned, arms coming to rest across his chest while he seemed to take in her state of distress.
"Good evening, Haruno-san. Did you sleep well?"
Now for all intents and purposes, having just broken down in front of this man and then simultaneously have him not only put her to sleep, but also clean her home, it was all too much. Sputtering incoherently, she forced herself to take a few steadying breaths before opening her mouth once more, "What are you doing here?"
The taller shinobi merely inclined his head quizzically, slender brow arching upward, "Is it not obvious? Making dinner of course."
"I can see that, but what are you doing here?" She repeated, staring absentmindedly at the comely vision he made.
Turning briskly, he switched off the stove and moved to grab a few spoonfuls of rice, plating it neatly before pouring a red stew overtop the rice. It seemed he had already made a side of vegetables, though Sakura was less focused on the savory meal he had prepared. Shino moved to the small bar area, placing the meal in front of the increasingly aggravated yet curious kunoichi, "As I've said earlier, I will see to your wellbeing until such a time that you can do so yourself."
"Curry?" She looked up at him incredulously, "You made me.. curry?"
"I assure you, Haruno-san, it is to your taste. I am aware you dislike spicy foods and as such took that to mind whilst preparing your meal. Though perhaps you would have preferred something sweeter instead? You are quite fond of dumplings, if I recall correctly, but they are not hearty enough nor nutritionally enriched to be served for dinner," he shrugged, leaning against the countertop casually, "we could have them for dessert provided you finish your meal."
Sakura glared petulantly as she took in his unbothered appearance and the lofty way in which he spoke of her life, "I don't need to be mothered, Shino."
An unimpressed hum met her ears as the man in front of her moved to the sink a few feet away where a pile of dirty dishes sat on the counter. Turning on the faucet, the bug nin got to work tidying up, "Oh? Is that so?"
"Yes! I am perfectly capable of taking care of myself," she growled, hating the way he returned to his task, a silent dismissal of her words.
The kitchen fell silent as the shinobi glanced in her direction, making a show of giving her a once over, "Then show me."
Mercury eyes flashed to viridian in a silent battle of wills as the two stared each other down, but as the sound of her rumbling stomach cut through the silence, Sakura turned her gaze to the dish in front of her, a light blush dusting across pale cheeks.
"Thank you for dinner," she bit out, hating the way her voice stuttered. Scooping up a spoonful of the wonderful smelling dish, she popped it inelegantly into her mouth, eyes widening as she savoured the meal he had made. The curry was mild just as he said, but packed full of different herbs and spices that blend harmoniously with the flavors of the rice and vegetables. A genuine smile lit up her face as she ate, a small spark of happiness filling her for the first time in so long.
She gave him a pleased smile and a small nod of approval, earlier anger nearly forgotten, "It's.. really good. I didn't know you could cook."
He nodded, focusing on cleaning the dishes that remained while she continued to eat, "With teammates such as mine, I had to learn or else we'd have starved long before. Kiba-san might not look like it, but he carries quite the appetite and Hinata-san can't quite bring herself to kill the prey we catch on missions."
Sakura hummed softly, blunt nails tapping her chin as she looked up at the ceiling, "Makes sense. Naruto is the same way you know, always saying he's hungry and that he wants ramen. It was always down to me to cook our food or else we'd eat nothing but noodles. Sas-"
Gulping quietly, she turned back to her plate, willing herself to remain calm, "He would catch and take care of the animal, clean whatever we caught and give it to me to cook."
There were a few moments of silence before Shino turned off the tap, placing the cleaned dishes on the strainer next to him, "How courteous. Though I must say, I didn't think you would have a hard time with hunting."
"Oh, no. I can handle myself just fine, but it's not something I enjoy," She stood, moving past the lounging shinobi and cleaning her own dish. She kept her eyes on her task, acutely aware of his pensive gaze, "I see death every day so when I do leave on missions, I prefer not to do anymore killing than necessary."
She saw him nod out of the corner of her eye, but he made no further effort to continue the conversation. Deciding to let the matter drop, she placed the dish on the drying rack and turned viridian eyes to the clock hanging above the stove. It was a little after eleven and knowing she had an early shift at the hospital, Sakura groaned quietly. It wasn't that she didn't love her job, but it was taking a toll on her with how frequently she had been scheduled. As if sensing her thoughts, Shino left the room and returned with one of her fluffy black towels. Handing the fabric over, he shooed her from the kitchen towards the bathroom, "Go ahead and wash up, Haruno-san. Take a bath and relax for once."
A frown played on her lips, her foot planting firmly to the floor with the barest hint of chakra, "I don't need you to tell me that. I relax just fine."
"I did not mean to imply that you are incapable of such a task, but your body is tired," Shino placated, gesturing to the oaken door before them, "Wash up, soak in the tub and do whatever you need to do so you can rest. Or were the words you said to me earlier nothing more than an empty promise?"
Sakura huffed petulantly, a scowl tugging on her features at his brazen response, "They were not, you ass."
"Name calling won't settle the matter. Show me that you can care for yourself. Until you do you are stuck with me," He informed her casually. Opening the door for the irritated pinkette, he watched as she stomped her way into the bathroom and slammed the door none too gently. With a sigh, the man turned and left.
Inside the bathroom, Sakura had to look around to recognize the pristine space. The counters had been cleaned and disinfected, the mirror so thoroughly cleaned it nearly sparkled, but perhaps the most impressive was the mopped floor. Blushing lightly, she scowled at the mess that he must have cleaned, her tight work schedule meaning she often came home late and left early which wasn't exactly ideal for her cleaning regime. Brushing a hand across her face, the pinkette waited until the distinct shuffle of feet had left and she could detect no chakra signatures nearby. Moving over to the small tiled shower, she turned on the taps, reaching a hand in to feel the water until it was warm enough. Sakura stripped down and tossed her crumpled clothes into the hamper before climbing into the tub, relishing in the heated spray.
Moving through the motions, Sakura washed her lengthy locks, making sure to condition so it wouldn't tangle on her later. Scrubbing her skin with her favorite lavender body wash, she hummed contentedly as the soothing scent reached her nose, the bathroom filling with the heady scent. A small hum of approval escaped her as she stood under the warm spray. Shaving, washing and exfoliating done, Sakura blocked out all the stress of the last few weeks and allowed herself the opportunity to truly breathe and release the tension she had been holding for so long. A small part of her felt guilty for relishing in the little comfort, but the more rational part of her mind accepted that she needed to decompress. It wasn't healthy to blame herself for the past and maybe one day she would truly forgive herself, but for tonight she would let all of the pain go and just rest.
Only when the water turned icy did she leave the safe haven of her bathroom, a fluffy black towel wrapped securely around her body. Glancing around warily and feeling for any chakra signatures, she could make out the unmistakable feel of the bug nin's chakra a bit away in her kitchen. Dashing to her room, the kunoichi wasted no time in locking the door and making her way over to the neatly folded clothes piled on her nightstand. Cheeks heating, Sakura wasted no time in dressing herself in a pair of shorts and matching top. Pulling the silky fabric of her tank top over her head, she had just finished dressing before a soft knock rasped on her door, "Haruno-san, might I come in?"
"Sure," She called, moving to unlock the door to find the bug nin standing in her doorway with a plate of anko dumplings and a cup of tea in the other hand. A sheepish smile tugged at the corner of his lips as he watched the pinkette stare up at him curiously.
"For you," he explained, handing over the sweet treat and fragrant tea, noting the gentle smile on her face as she took the plate.
Stuffing a few of the dumplings in her mouth, Sakura groaned appreciatively, savoring the sweetness of the red bean paste. A bright smile lit up her face as she turned towards the shinobi leaning casually against her door frame, "Thank you so much! You didn't have to."
"Nonsense," he supplied, brushing away her thanks with a quick wave of his hand, "You did as you were asked, and I am a man of my word."
Humming noncommittally, the pinkette took her time savoring the dish, a pleased hum echoing in the silent room. Viridian eyes studied the man before her curiously, wondering what his aim truly was. Shino Aburame was a friend, but up until now their meetings had been strictly professional. She hardly ever saw the man unless he brought a teammate to the hospital, namely Kiba, but he was always very polite if not a little distant. Although she believed he had good intentions, she just couldn't fathom why the stoic bug nin had decided to come and pull her out of her depression.
Deciding to leave the matter at rest for the time being, Sakura placed the plate on the dresser nearby and took a casual sip from the offered cup. The familiar flavor of chamomile and honey spread across her senses, a complimentary drink to her earlier treat. Glancing back at the bug nin, she was curious to find that he had moved over to her balcony door, staring up at the moon looming overhead. Though she was curious to ask, Sakura decided to stay quiet and allow the man his silence whilst she opted to finish the soothing tea. It was strange to have a man in her home, let alone her room, but whether it was due to his naturally shy nature or his quiet disposition, she felt at ease in the bug nin's presence. He had never been one for much talk, and she didn't expect that to change now that he seemed to want to care for her.
With the cup drained and eyes feeling heavy, she couldn't stifle the yawn spilling from her lips. Eyes drooping, she watched sleepily as the bug nin turned from the windowsill and placed a tiny winged insect beside her nightstand, the familiar musical notes playing once more. If she had any fight left in her she would have argued that she didn't need the comforting music, or the gentle brush of his palm against her crown, but as it stood she merely crawled under the covers and allowed someone to care for her for a change. The last cognizant thought she had was that it may not be so bad to be cared for by this man.