Chapter 5: The PotterHead and the Bipolar Mess

A/N UGH I'm not too fond of this chapter . I love you guize so much for saying this story was funny (I'm actually disabled at writing comedy XD), and this chappy didn't turn out too funny :( IM SORRY BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE!

Thanks to: LegendOfZeldaFreak: Aha thanx XD I actually have no idea why Bowser needs bananas...Juni:Your back! yay! Polestar- Master of Universes: I've always wanted to be radical...Mikayla Gawain : Thank you darling! AHA that quote came out of nowhere, but I loved it XD Ray-Kat-Hollows: Thanks for telling me your ships! I'll try and include them if I can ;)

Disclaimer: I don't own this horrid chapter. Jokes, I do. I do NOT own anything awesome included in this chapter, like Harry Potter, anything affliated with Nintendo, Pokemon, Red, or Sassy Link.

ONWARDS. I HOPE YOU DON'T HATE ME FOR THIS CHAPTER.

'What's this? A mockery of my powers?" Ganondorf bellowed as he stared, enraged at the giant hand in front of him. Master Hand sighed deeply as he stared right back at Ganondorf, whom he had just invited to join Brawl. Surprisingly enough, Ganondorf had laughed an eerie laugh and accepted, causing Master Hand to clap his hands happily. Well not exactly clap per se, because you know, he's a giant hand, but he was happy. Not even the ever so optimistic Master Hand had expected Ganondorf of all people to willingly come back to Brawl. But now that he had asked the Gerudo man to do him one little favor, the tantrum had started.

"Are you listening you ignorant fool? I am not an owl. I will not do your filthy duties for you I-" Ganondorf spat, his tantrum already in full swing. "Wait, did you just quote Harry Potter?" Master Hand asked, perplexed. Ganon paled, as a memory flooded his head.

Years ago at the Melee Mansion

'What is this? I am not here to watch movies with you cowards, I'm here to-" a younger (Does Ganon age?) Ganondorf started, staring at the room full of Melee competitors' who were sprawled across the mansion's giant living room.

"Look you unpleasant lump, we just asked if you wanted to watch a movie with us. Excuuuse us for attempting to be friendly." A much sassier Link stated from his perch next to Roy on the floor. "How dare you, you sassy elf-" Ganondorf snarled, purple magic already licking his fingertips.

"What did you just call me? You did not just go there." Link spat back, starting to get up, when he was interrupted by a cheerful Ness running screaming into the room. "POPCORNS READY!" he screeched, throwing the popped kernels in the air.

"YAY POPCORN!' the Melee competitors cheered, as they gathered around the flickering television, munching on the buttered goods. They were children really.

"It's starting, sssshhhhh!" Marth shushed, leaning in as the magical tune of Harry Potter started. Grumbling, Ganondorf began walking back to his room, as a yellow mouse-like animal came running into the room. Pichu stared up at the towering figure of Ganondorf, and Ganondorf stared right back. He never actually realized how cute the little Pokémon was. The King of Darkness actually thought that something in the world was cute. Pichu soon started scampering towards the room full of competitors, who were currently oohing and aaahing at Hagrid's bike, gesturing Ganondorf to follow him. The Dark king complied, still in a state of shock at thinking that something was cute, and before you knew it, Pichu was on Ganon's lap as the two sat through a whole Harry Potter marathon. The other competitors were soon asleep, lying at odd angles, but Ganon and Pichu persisted as they stared open mouthed at the magical movie in front of them.

Yep, Ganondorf was a closet Potterhead, so he couldn't help but quote Harry Potter ever so often. Not that it had happened in awhile. After Nintendo had sent the competitors back home, they had confiscated Ganon's box set of Harry Potter movies, and he hadn't really forgiven them for that.

Back to the present

"I have no idea what you're talking about." Ganondorf stated his mind still in a flurry after that flashback. "Sassy elf? I should be a comedian." Ganondorf thought as he chuckled.

After staring at Ganon for a few moments Master Hand started again.

"Look Ganondorf, it's not such a big deal, all you have to do is go deliver someone's invitation to Brawl!"

"No."

"Don't act like a stubborn child."

"No."

"Just invite Red, a trainer and his Poke-"

"I said no, you stupid hand."

"It's at Pokémon Land!" Master Hand stated, as a last straw. He saw as Ganon's eyes widened. Pokémon Land. Pokémon. Pichu. Pichu was a Pokémon.

"I still won't do it." Ganondorf said. He was a Dark King, and one thing that Dark Kings did not do was go back on their words.

"Remember, you forced me to do this Ganon." Master Hand said sighing. With a snap of his fingers, Ganon disappeared, mid-tantrum. Master Hand reached and pulled out a list from who knows where, and he skimmed it.

"Shoot. I should have made him go get Wario"

Pokémon Land

Red stared unhappily at the empty field in front of him. He was distraught, and incredibly so. Now people say that a Pokémon trainer can never bedistraught, but Red was an exception. Not only was the poor boy named after a colour, but he was shadowed. Shadowed by none other than Ash Ketchum, the boy who ran around the Regions with no supervision, battling, and switching girls every other season. That player. To make his state of sadness worse, he had been invited to join a tournament called Brawl. No, Red was not delusional, he was actually quite ecstatic at the news, but that was before…

A few minutes ago

Red was a sad child, but he hadn't really reached the state of distraughtness that he was going to reach in a few moments. His parents often worried for him, because of his constant downing attitude when he wasn't with his precious Pokémon. But Red hadn't always been so sad. There was a time years ago, when Red used to stay up all night watching TV and screaming and cheering. Yep, he was an obsessed fan girl-or boy- of Super Smash Bros Melee. He stalked their interviews, their battle strategies, their everything. But then came the day that Melee was canceled. Red shifted back to his original state of sadness, which was uplifted on the day he got the letter. The letter stating that he was invited to join Super Smash Bros Brawl. The letter that practically killed him with all his fangirling feels. That is, until he heard the hushed stories from his neighbors.

"Did you hear? That boy Maroon or something got invited to join a tournament!"

"I did, I did, but can you believe they didn't invite Ash Ketchum? He's quite the celebrity!"

"Marge, you didn't hear this from me, but apparently the big bosses from the tournament asked Ash first but he threw a diva fit and refused to participate! Something about "sharing air with other people."

"Children these days! So needy.'

"I know! So I think they stole his Pikachu and asked Blue to be their replacement trainer."

"Poor Aquamarine! He must feel so used, and useless, and unneeded, and…"

The conversation hadn't been much of a self-esteem booster for Red. Now here he was, sitting alone on a field, awaiting the person who was going to bring him to the place where he was unwanted. Sigh.

"-OU DARE DEFY THE KING OF DARKNESS?"

Red gave out what he hoped was a manly yelp as he leapt up from his place on the ground to stare at the giant who had appeared in front of him.

"W-who a-are you?" Red managed to stutter out, as he stared at the man with shocking red hair and glaring eyes.

"I am Ganondorf, your master, and I command you to tell me where I am. You may also call me The Almighty King of Darkness who the Dim Witted Elf shall Never Defeat." Ganondorf said, with a gleam in his eyes. He did need a new slave…

"Um okay Master; you're i-in the Sino Region-"Started the ever so obedient Red.

"You mean Pokémon Land?" Ganon interjected. He was never one for manners.

"Uh no, the S-Sino Region, um, and you just appeared here and yeah." Red finished, staring nervously at the hulking figure of darkness in front of him.

Ganondorf sighed boredly as he cursed Master Hand under his breath. "So, you are Red, correct?"

"Um yes, Mr. Uh The Almighty King of Darkness who the Dim Witted Elf shall Never Defeat…" Ganon nodded approvingly. He liked this one.

"Well come on then, grab your little beasts. They are but a chore to me." Ganondorf stated waving his hands airily. What he hadn't noticed was the angry flush that was spiking up Red's face.

You could insult him, call him Ash, appear in a random field in front of him, but never ever insult his Pokémon. Ever. That was a side of Red no one ever wanted to witness.

"What did you say? Lord of Darkness? I laugh at your stupidity. Ha." Red stated icily. This boy must have mood swings, because the look on Ganon's face was priceless.

"What? You dare-" Ganondorf started to splutter, caught totally off guard by the newly angered Red.

"Yes, I dare Ganondorf. And if you valued your mess of a face, I wouldn't insult my Pokémon one more time. Hear?" Red finished, his eyes clouded by a very creepy darkness. Ganondorf stared speechless at the glowering figure in front of him. Suddenly the evil face of Red, changed into something of…joy?

" A MINUTE. YOU'RE GANONDORF. OMG. OMG. FROM MELEE. SOMEONE HOLD ME." Red said, his eyes widening. This boy was a mess.

Ganondorf was honestly quite scared of the boy who was now slowly prodding him and muttering things like "He's a big boy now! I could hardly recognize him!", and frankly he had had enough. He prepared to transport the two to wherever Brawl was located until an idea sparked in his head.

"Er Red, um, you like bea-I mean Pokémon right? So, have you ever by chance, seen Pichu around?" Ganondorf asked nervously, afraid that the trainer would tell everyone at the Brawl arena about his obsession with the Pokémon. But thankfully, Red didn't even bat an eye, as he continued to prod Ganondorf.

"No, actually Pichu wasn't invited this time. They got a bunch of other Pokémon like Lucario, and Pikachu's the only one who's coming to Brawl this time. Here he comes."

Ganon wasn't really paying attention to what the trainer was saying, but he got the vibe that Pichu was coming. Putting on his best poker face, Ganon turned around to face what he hoped was Pichu.

"Pi- OH MY MOTHER OF DIN."

Apparently Ganon hadn't gotten a very good look at Pikachu back at Melee…

A/N So hate me yet? Please review and give me some criticism! I BEG OF YOU. xx love you all :) BTW did anyone notice my Legend of Zelda cartoon reference? No? Ok.