Mamma Mia

Life's most persistent and urgent question is, what are you doing for others

"Are you ready?" Mercy grabbed hold of Sam's hand asking with concern in her voice

"I don't know" he looked at the hotel he needed to walk into "Five minutes" he suggested yet again

They'd been sitting outside this particular hotel for the last twenty minutes, admittedly they were early, but Mercy felt Sam was going to chicken out of the whole thing he'd been so nervous all day, he'd been nervous for the last three months. This wasn't something that happened to anyone every day

Flashback

Sam had been adopted as a two-year-old baby, his adoptive parents were great, they gave him all the things, and opportunities, life had to offer for eight years of his life. Then his mom died when he was eight, of cancer, which wasn't detected early enough to be treated properly and ended up consuming her, his dad went into a deep depression shortly after she passed and eventually, after a rough year, he entered a psychiatric hospital which should have been short term, but he ended his own life there abruptly.

As the child left behind, everyone who knew his story saw him as the victim in it all, but he'd watched his parents, he understood their love, even at that young age, and in all honestly he'd thought of it as a beautiful love story, just like the one his mom used to read him at night.

Sam was lucky enough to be left with a very large sum of money, several properties, and a business, which meant he was set for life. There was no time wasted, he was sent to private school, given the best education money could buy and visited his only living relatives, and guardian, his grandfather, every holiday. The bond he'd grown to have with his grandfather was stronger than the one he had with his father, when he was eighteen his grandfather had sat him down and told him the truth about his parents fostering him, unfortunately, his grandfather died just before his nineteenth birthday, needless to say he entered college as a lost soul.

College was like a different world to him, he went through it numb, not knowing his place in the world and trying to fit in with whom he saw as normal people. After two years of wondering through life aimlessly, most of his friends went off to university, but he'd had enough, when he was twenty-one, he thought he knew everything he needed to know about business, so he leaped into the family business which was waiting for him. After fulfilling a clause in the will that his father had put in place, stating that he had to know the business from the ground up, on his twenty fourth birthday he became the CEO of the family landscaping business

He wasn't a stranger to women, he took them out, treated them well, but when it came to opening up, that was always a red flag for him. He was never comfortable letting anyone know his humble beginnings, but without warning five years into his leadership, the one Miss Mercedes Jones entered his life

Three Months Ago

Mercy had been a client that wasn't happy with the work one of his contractors had done on her property, she stomped into the office shouting, waving her purse that looked like a weapon around, demanding to speak to the head of the shit show, he stood in his glass fronted office watching her for a while before he eventually reared his head. There was a lot of shade thrown before she settled with no other than him overseeing the snag list she'd drawn up, and over that week they got to talking, that was when he exposed more of himself than he'd intended to

"You should try and find her" she finally told him after listening one evening to the detail of his life story

"Who?" he looked up shocked that she hadn't heard him say his mother had died

"Your birth mother"

"I don't really want to know her"

"Are you sure about that, you've talked about her a lot over these past few days"

"I'm sure"

She didn't push that any further that day, but she did let him carry on his answerless conversations with her. She smiled at the extra's he was putting onto her sky garden, two extra loungers in the seating area, changing the tempered glass to curved slats which meant they'd block out the breeze when it got heavy and shaded parts of the garden from rain too. The water feature was smaller than she'd requested but instead of changing it, he'd installed a larger hot tub, and surrounded it with plants making the area feel tropical. She didn't admit it to him, but he knew her a little more than she was comfortable with for someone she'd only known for four days.

"Sam" she stopped him talking the fifth day of the project, unable to keep her thoughts to herself any longer "I really think you should try and find your birth mother"

"I've been thinking about it" he shocked her saying "I've been thinking about my roots, and I wanted to see what I could find out"

"That's a start"

"Will you come with me?"

"I could" she looked at him wondering if he was joking "if that's what you need"

"I need someone, and you're the only person I've ever told my life story to, so I guess it makes sense"

"Okay, just say when"

They were sitting in her new sky garden listening to the trickling water fountain, already three weeks into the search, deflated because nothing was coming to light, she suggested he might need an expert to find something, anything for him to grab onto, so he agreed and called in an expert instructing them to trace his bloodline.

Two Months Ago

A week later he was sitting in his office calling Mercy, asking her to come over as soon as she could

"I got something" he held the envelop up as she walked into his office "I hope you don't mind; I didn't want to face this alone"

"No, it's fine"

"I don't mind admitting I'm freaking out about this" he grinned sheepishly

"Come on" she threw her purse on the chair in front of his desk and walked around the desk to sit on it in front of him "Let's do this" she kissed his cheek before pulling herself up onto the desk to look into his eyes

"Please" he handed her the envelop

"Okay" she snatched it off him and ripped it open "So" she looked at him before getting serious again "ready?"

"Yeah" he sat back in his chair trying to relax

"Your father, whose name was Daniel Evans was a civil engineer who died in February 1994 under suspicious circumstances"

"My name could have been Evans?" he laughed

"Can still be" she smiled before looking back at the paperwork "Your mother whose name was Mia Evans was a musician" she looked up at him "Seems you have that in common"

"Go figure" he smiled

"And she's still alive" she looked at him amazed as she waited for a reaction

"She's alive?" his eyes widened

"That's what it says" she held the paper up for him to see

"Are there any pictures?"

"Sorry" she showed him the empty envelop "So what's the next move?"

"I'll need to think" he buried his head in his hands "Sorry" his voice broke

"It's fine" Mercy got up "Call me when you need me" she kissed his cheek and left his office, it was clear he needed time to process the information she'd just given him.

"Daniel and Mia Evans" he gasped when he finally stopped crying, he was surprised at how relieved he actually was having found out something real about himself, his name should have been Sam Evans, maybe at one point it actually was. His mind needed more information, he grabbed the letter to inspect it closer, smiling because now he had a name, age, and an old address, he'd already made his mind up, this wasn't the end of his search.

First, they found an aunt, but she wasn't of sound mind and wasn't able to give them any information worth following up, then they got a call from the hospital to say Mia had visited her sister and was willing to pass on her address for Sam to send a letter, but she wasn't ready to meet him.

"What can I write?" he sat at the dining table in Mercy's garden asking

"Let's finish dinner first" Mercy laughed

"I've just got so much to say"

"You don't want to say everything all at once"

"I do, I have so many questions"

"You sound so excited for someone who didn't want to know"

"I didn't think I did, but she's alive, and she was married to my birth father" he smiled "I always imagined her being a single mom, poor, abused maybe" he looked in Mercy's eyes "And now to find out she was actually married, I just need to know the reason why she gave me up"

"Eat up" she smiled at his newfound enthusiasm

After dinner they sat at the table constructing the perfect letter "Dear Mrs Evans, does that sound too formal?"

"No, it's fine"

"Okay" his head went down to carry on writing, Mercy got up to tidy up leaving him with his thoughts as he scribbled them down. Eventually she came back to the table with two cups of coffee having watched him staring out at the rooftops for five minutes

"Writer's block?" she sat down and pushed his coffee across the table to him

"No" he turned to look at her "I think I've said enough, don't want to overwhelm her" he scribbled on the paper again "Listen to this, tell me what you think" he sat reading his letter to his birth mother to the woman that had become his friend, maybe his best friend now, as socialising had long not been his thing

My name is Sam I'm not sure what my surname supposed to be. I was born on 29th April 1998 at Texas Childrens Hospital. I learned of your details through an agency and am please you have reached out to have this communication with me.

I need you to know that the people who adopted me Dwight and Anne Norton were exceedingly kind and generous to me, and for the time I was with them I was happy, unfortunately they have now passed. I didn't do very well at school, but I went on to attend college and did very well in business studies, which is serving me well.

I would like very much to be in touch with you and maybe even meet you one day, but I understand that is my wish and will not contact you unless with your explicit permission, although knowing you would mean so much to me, and answer so many questions about myself, maybe the next move might be to share contact numbers

Hope to communicate again soon – Sam

"What do you think?"

"I think it says enough"

"It wasn't as hard as I thought it was going to be to be honest" he picked up the cup of coffee and stood up "Reminds me of when I used to write to my mother" he looked out at the rooftops again "She was long gone, but I just didn't know who else to speak to about all the stuff dad was going through"

"Do you remember anything about your birth mother?"

"No, I didn't even know she existed until grandpa told me I was adopted"

"But she kept you for nearly two years, so there might be something you've kept in your subconscious" she got up to join him looking at the rooftops at the familiar scene

"That's all a bit deep don't you think?" he turned to look at her "I feel like I'm betraying my parents"

"You're not" she smiled at him "You're just lucky enough to have had two sets of parents and none can discount the other, they both served very different purposes in your life"

"How's that?" he pulled his eyes away from her, trying to concentrate on the conversation while wondering why he was feeling her so intensely in his space, quickly reminding himself that she was his friend

"One set brought you into the world and loved you enough to want better than what they had for you, and the other set loved you enough to take you in as their own and leave you everything they possessed, to ensure you had the life both sets wished for you"

"You have this unique way of looking at things, I love it" he smiled down at her, getting lost in the gaze "Did I ever thank you for doing this with me?"

"All the time" she laughed, feeling the unease "Now get that letter written up properly and we can post it"

"Tonight?" he flashed the thought out of his head

"Right now, no time like the present"

"Pushy"

"You need it sometimes" she laughed, walking around the table to sit back down

Mercy sat looking at him concentrating on his letter, she was way out of her depth on this one, their childhood couldn't have been any different, she was brought up by both her parents, had everything she wanted too, but if asked if she was loved, she'd have to say no. They argued constantly from the minute they opened their eyes, until she closed hers and went into a deep sleep, and very rarely acknowledged the fact that she was in the room.

Most of her teenage years Mercy had found herself sitting on a stool in a woman she'd grown to call Aunt Dee's house, she wasn't related but when it came to advice and guidance, she was more like her mother than her actual mother. She'd gone to college to get away from the noise, fights, and to stop being scared, and found she liked it more than she'd expected. By the time she started her second year she'd already made her mind up she wasn't going back home and dived into building her own future, she was doing pretty well for herself.

"What?" he looked up at her asking

"Nothing" she smiled "I was just thinking how brave you are"

"I don't know about that" he laughed going back to his writing

One Month Ago

"Could you come over?" he shouted down the phone stood in his boxers looking at the letter in his hand "She wrote back"

"Give me half an hour" Mercy couldn't catch her breath, they'd been waiting for a week for a reply, they hoped one would come, but now it was here, they were still past surprised "The one day we didn't get to say todays the day" she laughed

"I know" he laughed "My stomach's flipping like crazy, hurry up" he'd managed to get a dressing gown on in the time she'd taken to shower, get dressed, and drive across town "Sorry" he looked down at himself "I couldn't concentrate on anything I just need this…." he flashed the letter at her "Reading"

"Sit down" she snatched it off him and walked into his living room

His apartment was a penthouse, ceiling to floor windows on three sides, with which you'd expect to have no privacy, but there was plenty, everything in the house was earth coloured, with greenery dotted around. The large patio covered the three glassed sides, the right side of the patio had chairs, a table, barbeque area, couches chairs and an outside fireplace while the right side had a swimming pool and enclosed sauna

"What did she say?" he sat next to her asking eager to hear her words

"Ready?" she looked at him happy but concerned for what he was going to hear

My Dearest Sam

I regret asking you to write instead of meeting with you, but you hear so many stories about frauds, I just couldn't trust it. Then the doubt set in, because after handing you over I wondered why you'd ever want anything to do with me. I'm so happy that you decided to make contact it's something I've prayed on since the day I left you

We have so much to talk about, of course there's a sorry after every word, I've never forgiven myself, Once you were officially adopted the files were closed to me, so I wasn't able to find you, so I've wondered for nearly thirty years what happened to you, if you were alright, if you thought about me, or even remembered me

I'm happy you had good parents, because that means tht all my pain was worth it, but I'm sad you had to carry on without them. I don't want to disrupt anything about your life, and I don't want to replace your parents, but I would like to see you, if you'd allow, just to lay eyes on you, maybe fill in some gaps, for both of us, and hold you in my arms again

I do hope you agree to meeting me soon – Mia

"She wants to see me?"

"Yeah" Mercy smiled at the good news, she'd been praying for this for him, he'd pinned so much on it, he wouldn't even think about her rejecting him "She wants you to arrange it"

"Wow" he grinned

"There's just one thing we need to work out"

"What's that?"

"She lives in Ohio"

"We can go to her" he brushed the obstacle aside "That's the reason she doesn't visit her sister often"

"I guess"

"Dinner later?" he got up asking "I want to apologise for getting you out of bed early and making you late for the studio this morning"

"I finish around seven tonight"

"I'll book for nine"

"Okay" she got up walking towards the front door "Picking me up?"

"Of course," he pushed his bedroom door open and walked in, she opened the front door and walked out, both enthused to start their working day

At dinner that night they'd made plans on how the whole thing was going to pan out, Sam was super excited "Can you believe we're doing this?" he jumped out the car when he dropped her off outside her building

"I know" he giggled "And all this is happening because of you" he stepped towards her for a kiss on the cheek and a hug "Thank you" he whispered in her ear

"I was just a very loud conscience" she laughed pulling away from him slightly

"You were more than that" he looked into her eyes, the silence dulled everything around him out "I.." he leaned in and brushed his lips with hers "Sorry" he pulled away as quickly as he'd made the move "I don't know…"

"Don't you?" she asked smiling "It was nothing, the excitement of the moment" she pulled away from him "I'll see you in two days"

"Okay" he watched her walk into her building, turn to wave at him still smiling before she closed the door behind her, and she was gone. He stood wondering why the hell he'd just tried to turn their friendship into something else, he hadn't even given himself any warning, he'd just dived in without thinking.

Two days later they were sitting in the local café trying to work out how to clear their diaries, looking at recommendations for local hotels, and she was helping him to write a short letter to Mia telling her of their planned visit.

The response took a while, but eventually after two weeks of waiting they got a response it was all go, all that planning and preparation had boiled down to twelve hours of rush, they sat on the plane finally resting for the first time in twenty-four hours

"Can you believe we're almost there?" she turned to look at him

"I'm so scared" he grabbed her hand

"Me too" she admitted "Meeting your birth mom on your actual birthday, it's crazy"

"It's so emotional" he squeezed her hand "Thank you for being here"

"I've got nowhere else to be" she leaned in and kissed his cheek "You're kind of like my best friend"

"No kind of about it" he grinned "You're my best friend for sure" twenty-four hours later they were sat outside the hotel looking at the door

End of Flashback

"You've already had twenty minutes" she smiled, chocking up at seeing his fearful eyes "I'll be right here when you finish"

"Could you…"

"Sam" she rolled her eyes "This is something between you and your birth mom, I can't get in the middle of that"

"You're already in the middle"

"I'll be right here" she closed her eyes as he gently kissed her cheek and opened the car door, saying nothing he stepped out oof the car and made his way across the carpark and into the reception area of the building

"Sam Norton" he informed the receptionist "I booked a small meeting room and very small buffet for twelve thirty"

"Mr Norton" she looked at him then back at the register "No Sir, I don't see…"

"Sorry" he smiled "I mean Sam Evans" he hadn't even told Mercy he'd done that

"Yes Sir" she looked up smiling "Everything is ready for you; food should be in shortly" she called for someone to take him through

"Thank you" he smiled flirtatiously knowing the woman had eyes for him

He walked into a rather warm room, very pink, and very pricy in contrast to the reception area, you'd have thought you were in a cosy corner café, it was clean and for only two people to meet in, it was adequate. He sat down, stood up, sat down again and then his head spun when the door opened, only to relax itself when he saw the trolly of food arriving, that was too much, he thought, no way was he going to eat anything, what a stupid idea. He'd barely sized up the food when he heard a voice

"Definitely your father's son" he didn't turn straight away, he wanted to imagine for a second what she looked like, trying to conjure up in his mind the image of his birth mother, but the suspense won, he spun around

"Mia?" he looked at this woman tall, slender, greying blond hair, her face telling the tales he longed to hear, and his smile on her face, he smiled back at her nodding face "Mia" that suddenly sounded so rude. He didn't know what to expect when she came walking towards him, but when he got the hug, something inside him remembered it, it was something he'd expected to do, but he was so overwhelmed he cried, hugging her as if his life depended on it.

"Sorry" she finally pulled away from him "You just look so much like your father it took my breath"

"I look like him?" he looked into the eyes of a woman, he knew nothing about, but yet he knew that he knew her "Please sit down" he pulled the chair closest to him out for her "Have something to eat" he pointed at the food

"I couldn't eat a thing right now" she looked at the platter "Sorry" she pulled a hanky out of her sleeve and wiped her face "I guess you have questions?"

"Silly ones" he wiped his face with his sleeve

"Nothing's silly" she assured him

"Who knew about me?" he sat opposite her resting his hands on the table

"Everyone" she smiled touching his hand "You were a well needed present, your father and I grew up as neighbours, fell in love as teenagers, and got married when we hit twenty-one" she laughed "So when news broke that we were having twins everyone was happy, the village called me Mamma Mia"

"Twins?"

"They didn't survive" she squeezed his arm "Then five years later our little miracle happened, but so many rocks came at the same time, his father died, we'd already lost the others before we got married. Then we found out Dan had bowel cancer, back then they weren't as fast as they are now, he was riddled with it before they could blink, he never had a chance" a tear rolled down her face "The grief was too much, I had no one, a child and a home being repossessed, it was alright for me to be homeless, but you, no way"

"So, you gave me away?" his voice understanding

"Only until I got back on my feet" she looked into his eyes "You were all I had" she wiped more tears "But life wasn't good to me, and getting back up wasn't as easy as it had all seemed the day I handed you over. Nothing I did was good enough for those people, and in the end the courts ruled you weren't to be with me anymore, and you were gone" she cried some more "I cried for years"

"Well, I'm here now, and hopefully you'll want to get to know me"

"Course I will" she squeezed his hand again

"I have someone very important to me that I'd like you to meet" he took his phone out and made the call, quickly leaving the room to grab Mercy "This is Mercy Jones" he smiled at Mia "She's the reason we finally met"

"Thank you" Mia hugged her without warning, smiling at Sam when she let her go "She's pretty"

"She is" he laughed throwing his arm around Mercy's shoulder as he looked down at her, unsure what the force was but he bent in and kissed her lips again "Totally inappropriate" he commented before she did

"One of these times you won't make an excuse" she grinned at him, turning to pay his birth mother attention

"Keep up" Mia laughed "Us Evans' are never slow off the mark" she winked at Mercy "Thank you for helping him find me" she nodded at Mercy before they sat down to talk some more. Sam sat listening to the two women talk, this felt right, he grabbed Mercy's waiting hand and smiled his appreciation for making this easier