Chapter 13
I don't own Divergent!
TRIS'S POV:
I wake up with my heart still pounding, blood rushing through my veins as if I am still held over the Chasm.
I open my eyes and hear water running from a faucet. Quieter than the Chasm.
Not the Chasm.
Tobias stands at the faucet washing off blood from his fingers with a placid, unyielding expression. The blood turns the water pink like a rose petal burned in the sun.
I remember only a couple of things from the walk back them only are two things- the curl of ink around a neck and the gentle sway that meant he was carrying me.
I debate on whether I should act as if I'm still asleep or not but then he looks up and it's too late.
"Tobias…" I croak out my voice scratchy like a sheet of sandpaper.
I swallow once wincing and pressing two fingers to my throat at the pain.
"Tris," he says coming over to the side of the bed an ice pack in hand.
I faintly wonder why he would have ice packs in his cubicle, why he would need any.
It reminds me of my instructor. Always prepared, read for the worst situations.
My instructor always wore this mask though, not even identifying his name.
There are small cuts on his knuckles and a cut on the side of his lip.
"How are you feeling?" he asks the placid expression masking his eyes concern.
"Better," I say my words coming out in a whisper a faint blow of the wind.
It's a lie. My head throbs and the blood pounds loudly causing me to shallow my breaths.
"I highly doubt that," he responds easing the ice pack under my head.
His hand brushes my head and my scalp prickles with pain, sharp and distinct like the desire I had to become Dauntless.
"Sorry," he says when I wince.
I shake my head slightly.
"Would it be bad to sit up?" I ask.
"I'll help you," he says.
One hand slides under my back and the other grips my head gently. I push myself up stifling the moan that I know is going to come.
"You can be in pain, it's just me," he says.
"Did you see my note?" I rasp.
Tobias's eyes don't waver from the neutral gleam but I sense something has happened to cause him to be stony.
"Tris you shouldn't have gone," he says.
Although in profound pain, I feel defensive.
"I was fine until they came along," I retort.
"No, I meant – just…" he doesn't finish.
I feel my gaze soften. His eyes don't show unending pity and sympathy, I would've been disappointed if they did.
I lean my head back of the metal bars breathing heavily from the movement.
"Why were you there?" I ask.
"I was worried Marcus would be out there," he responds.
"Why would Marcus be here?"
"He wants to meet up again, decide what to do with the camp and such," he says.
My eyes widen. Marcus is still trying to get Christina.
I don't ask him why he didn't tell me, I'm too tired.
"What happened to them?"
"Al and Peter ran, Drew well let's say he's not very pretty- although he never was," he says grimacing.
I hear the joke at the end of it and the corners of my lips tip up slightly- very slightly.
"How bad is he?"
"He'll live- in what condition I can't say," he says biting his lip.
I reach for his arm and squeeze it once.
"Good," I say.
He gives me a conflicted look and I notice again the small cut at his lip.
I reach up to touch it and then realize what I'm doing and stop leaving my hand hovering.
What do you have to lose?
I reach up and touch his cut softly skimming his skin.
"Tris, I'm fine," he says against my fingers. "You're off worse."
Suddenly everything blows back at me hard and cold. My screams, the touch, the pain.
White-hot fury courses through my veins propelled by my anger. I feel unreasonable, I want to hit a wall, break something, anything to make me feel better. Instead tears come.
I feel the heat spreading through my eyes and threatening to spill themselves.
Tobias reaches out and touches my cheek resting his hand there and skimming his thumb across my cheekbone.
I'm surprised by this but don't pull back.
"Is Al here?" I ask slowly trying to steady my breaths and voice.
His fingers continue to skim the hard bone in my cheek warming up my face.
I thought Al was considered something of a friend. I remember now he was in initiation with me. He seemed to have stronger feelings for me then.
"No, I checked. I don't know where he went though," he responds.
I nod and the tears spill themselves. Neither of us acknowledges them.
His finger brushes a tear and he wipes it away with quick precision.
"I could report this," he says.
"I don't want to seem weak," I say.
He could tell the guards but word spreads fast in Dauntless.
"I thought you would say that, but are you sure?"
This rubs me the wrong way although it was just genuine concern for my well-being.
"You don't get it, what they could've done to me," I say.
His body turns rigid as I see the gears working out scenarios in his head. His blue eyes gleam with anger.
"Could've," he says plaintively.
"Could've but didn't," I respond.
His hand slips off my face. I miss the warmth almost immediately.
"Do me a favor Tris," he says tipping up my chin so my eyes meet his.
I remember what he responded when I asked the same thing earlier.
"Anything."
I almost see him smile.
"Ruin them."
TOBIAS'S POV:
The things they could've done if I hadn't beaten the hell out of them. I watch as she settles into my bed pulling the sheets closer to her chin.
I want to go beat the life out of those three people but I know it's illogical.
I feel the same worry I did when I was an instructor for Dauntless initiation. The same ache of doubt that I wasn't doing the right thing. In this cause, not doing the right thing about Tris. I've dragged her into enough trouble with Marcus already and now I don't even know what to do.
I pull some extra blankets from the shelf in the corner and grab a black pillow.
It's funny the lengths that Dauntless goes to attain black… everything.
"Tobias?" I hear Tris say.
I look up from spreading out the blankets to Tris.
"Could you do me a favor?"
"Anything."
"Please don't tell anyone about this unless it's Christina or I tell them myself," she says.
"Of course," I say nodding my head.
It stings a bit to think she doesn't trust me to do this already but I understand that with what just happened I would feel the same.
"Thank you," she says.
I nod.
Somehow, I feel that it's my fault that she was attacked.
It isn't Tobias.
I know.
"Wait, should I go back to my room?" she asks.
"Not in your condition," I reply curtly.
Everything with Marcus and Tris was making my mind reel and I feel myself closing off again.
I stare down at my phone. It reads 12:05 am.
Marcus would be waiting for me. I wouldn't go though- I'm not going to go.
The relevance of going is at the last check on my list.
"Goodnight Tris," I say.
I hear a muffled voice that says "night Toby" and a clearing of a throat.
Her hair is spread delicately around her head resembling a golden halo, streaks of gold and pale blonde light. I see her clutching the blanket tightly between her thin fingers as if it will slip beneath her grasp if she doesn't hold on tightly.
I settle myself down on my makeshift bed and snuggle down to the blankets.
Marcus, my father, Jeanine, the lunatic helping my father.
I stare up at the ceiling wondering if my father never abused me, if he never was evil, if my mother didn't leave me, if I would be the person I am today.
I breathe and slowly without even realizing, I fall into the chilling darkness known as sleep.
[PAGE BREAK]
I wake up and take a shower wiping of the blood, grit, and haunting-ness of the day before.
I step out and pull on black jeans and a long-sleeve navy shirt. I grab a small towel and walk out the door rubbing the wetness off my head.
I see Tris up staring at me as I walk through the door. Her gaze focuses somewhat at my midsection before flickering to my eyes.
"Hi," I say.
"Hi," she responds.
The word take effort to say and it's tense, tight.
I walk over to my bed leaning my knees on the side of the mattress.
"How you feeling?"
"Better than yesterday," she says.
My eyes flit to her neck where the bruises start. For now they are black but when it gets worse it will be splashed over with green and purple and a sickly yellow.
I touch her cheek where there is a scratch and then slide my hand down to her ribs.
She seems to hold her breath when I touch her.
"And here?"
"Only hurts when I breathe," she says.
I smile down at her.
"Can't do much about that."
She gives me a light smile.
"Can I change?" she asks.
"Of course although I don't suppose you have any spare clothes." I say.
She looks embarrassed.
I touch her cheek again- I seem to be developing a habit- and she looks at me.
"Don't worry, you can borrow a shirt," I saw moving to find a shirt.
I dig through draws and try to find a shirt that I've outgrown with no luck. I toss her the tightest shirt I can find and she slowly- in pain I'm guessing- walks to the bathroom.
I go out to the living room to see the guys are gone. I thought they would've been sleeping but I guess since today is Sunday they decided to go to the hall for breakfast.
When Tris walks out she grabs my jacket and zips it over the tee shirt hiding that it's too large for her.
"They went to breakfast," I say.
Her face instantly pales the blood draining.
"Oh-ok," she says.
She doesn't want to go but I know she will anyway.
"Me first, you first, or together?" I ask.
She moves close to my side grabbing my arm as if to fend of attackers. She then realizes what she did and lets go- but not before I grab her hand.
"Together."
A/N: Thank you for so many reviews. I'm glad you guys like it. Please enjoy this chappie! Always open to ideas and please tell me what you think in a review!