Lost in Translation- SORRY UPLOADED THE WRONG FILE BEFORE!
A/N: Hey everyone! Lost in translation did not with the update vote – actually lost in the seas of forgotten memories won but I can't update that story right now because it requires a bit too much brainpower to continue where I left it off. I will update that story first when exams are over. As for now I guess it's a win for the people who voted for this story. Hope you like it!
Chapter 5
Clint groaned as he shifted on his bed and felt all the joints in his body flare up. He felt like he was dying. Everything hurt. Why do missions always have to be so rough? He rolled over and suddenly knocked right into a familiar warm body. He froze – pillows weren't supposed to be that warm.
The next thing he knew he was shoved right off the bed and slammed into the hard cold floor with a resounding thump! He groaned in pain as he held his stomach – now he was going to hurt for days.
"WHAT THE HECK WAS THAT?" Clint exclaimed pushing himself off the ground and glaring up at the other lump in his bed.
A death glare was the response. Natasha Romanoff in all her crazy bed headed glory firmly pointed to the bed and then to herself.
'My bed,' she mouthed to him angrily. What? He suddenly glanced around and realized exactly where he was - he was in her room. When did that happen? Wait, did he even leave yesterday?
"I fell asleep?" he asked in shock. She nodded warily. He furrowed his brow.
"Wait…why didn't you just wake me up?" he asked in confusion. She coughed into her hand and a light blush crossed her face.
'I did too,' she mouthed to him. Clint rolled his eyes and fell back onto her bed causing Natasha to nearly fall on top of him. She glared at his limp body lying in front of her.
"Can I just stay here and pretend I don't have to go to SHIELD for my stupid meeting with Fury?" he mumbled into her pillow. Natasha rolled her eyes – he was such a baby.
She poked him in the side and made him jump.
"Hey! I was getting comfortable!" he complained. She poked him again and made him look over. She pointed at her rumpled uniform that she still hasn't changed out of and pointed to the door. He furrowed his brow at her vague actions.
"You're kicking me out…because you want to change?" he said slowly. She nodded and pointed at the door again. A devious glint suddenly entered his eyes – she didn't like the looks of that. He promptly rolled over and took her down with him. Natasha huffed as he rolled on top of her pinning her to her own bed with his arms trapping either side of her face.
"What if I don't want to go?" he whispered intimately. Natasha took a deep breath as he leaned into her. She made a fake gun with her hand and pointed it at his head. Clint chuckled darkly.
"I'm not afraid of guns Natasha," he whispered in her ear as he trailed his hands down her sides and back up leaving Goosebumps wherever he went. Natasha tried desperately not to react but her stupid body was betraying her. He smiled slowly as he felt a shiver go up her spine. Gotcha.
"Why is your heart racing Natasha? Are you scared?" he whispered teasingly. Natasha scowled at him even as her breathing rate became uneven. It wasn't fair – she was basically handcuffed because she couldn't talk back. She tried to think of something to say – anything to show him he didn't have her cornered – but she was coming up with blanks because his hands were so damn distracting!
"What's wrong Tasha? Cat got your tongue?" he whispered millimeters from her lips. He smirked as he watched her pupils dilate against her will. No other girl's dynamic response to his advances really fascinated him as much as Natasha's did. She was incredibly responsive – the complete opposite to the black widow. The black widow was a master at manipulating men into whatever feeling she wanted them to be trapped in. But Natasha Romanoff was different. Natasha Romanoff was his – she just didn't know that yet. Her intense denial in contrast with her betraying body always amused him to no end.
Meanwhile Natasha was going to spontaneously combust if he kept looking at her like that.
She promptly covered her nose and pointed at his mouth. Clint's acting broke as the horror crossed his face. She sighed in relief – she didn't know how much more of that she could take before she did something crazy.
"My breath doesn't smell bad!" Clint exclaimed before he ran into her washroom to vigorously brush his teeth. Natasha died laughing at his response while lying on her bed. She totally lied to him.
She laughed until she couldn't laugh anymore at his horrified expression. She stared up at her ceiling with a slight smile still on her face. Clint was such a bipolar man. One minute he was playful and whiny and the next minute he had her heart racing with his dangerous side playing with her emotions. One day she was going to screw with him and see how much he liked to squirm.
"Where the hell is the toothpaste?" Clint growled from the washroom. Natasha snorted – definitely bipolar.
20 minutes later.
"Do I have to come?" Clint groaned as he held his SHIELD phone to his ear.
"For the last time – yes! The answer is not going to change no matter how many times you ask," Maria said through gritted teeth.
"Why can't you just pretend I'm there? Why doesn't Cap have to come? He was awake at the end of the mission too!" Clint huffed. Maria Hill pinched the bridge of her nose – children, she deals with 6 overgrown children.
"Bring him too – I don't care! Just get your ass here in 30 minutes or I will make your life hell. It's just for an hour Barton – stop being lazy," Maria said irritably. Clint scowled at the phone.
"I'm not the one who periodically takes naps while on the job," he muttered childishly. Maria turned a deep shade of red – was nothing ever a secret at SHIELD?
"SHUT UP BARTON! JUST BE HERE OKAY? GOOD BYE!" she shouted before she promptly hanged up on him. Clint sighed as he shoved his phone into his pocket – well apparently there was no way of getting out of that one. He reluctantly got dressed and walked into Natasha's room to see if she was still alive before he left. He raised an eyebrow as he walked in on an amusing scene.
Natasha was jumping on her bed trying to reach a shirt that was stuck to her ceiling. Now that made him wonder how that got there in the first place and what exactly was keeping it up there.
"Do you want me to get it down for you?" he asked leaning against her door frame. Natasha froze as she finally noticed him standing there – how long was he watching her madness?
The shirt promptly fell on her head as she stood on her bed like a deer caught in headlights. The grin on his face was impossible to hide.
He walked over and pulled the shirt off her head and glanced down at the familiar black piece of clothing. He furrowed his brow in confusion.
"Wait a minute…this is my shirt," he said in realization. Natasha froze – someone kill her now.
Natasha turned into a tomato so fast Clint thought she was going to explode. She promptly grabbed the shirt from his hand and ran out of the room – smooth Russian spy very smooth.
"Hey you can't run away after a discovery like that!" he laughed as he ran after her. Natasha sprinted around the corner and ran right past a bewildered looking Steve Rogers and Bruce Banner. She groaned – more witnesses to kill – fantastic!
Clint rounded the corner seconds later right on her tail.
"Hey Cap we have a mandatory meeting at SHIELD in 25 minutes! Get ready you're coming with me!" Clint shouted over his shoulder at the tired looking Captain. Steve groaned – he didn't want to go anywhere right now – he just wanted to sleep!
10 minutes later the mysterious black shirt was nowhere to be found and there was a red faced Natasha Romanoff sitting in the Avengers common room with her head in a book.
"Book is upside down Tasha," Clint said passing her as he walked towards the door. Tony snickered as Natasha promptly threw the book across the room – she was mortified – there was nothing saving her dignity now. She didn't even take his shirt – it was just there.
"It's okay Natasha you can have my sh-" Clint started to say by Natasha promptly shot forward and nearly knocked him to the ground as she covered his mouth. She glared at him as he steadied both of them so that they didn't crash to the ground. He raised an eyebrow at her angry look. There was no way in hell she was letting the rest of the team know about this epic loss of dignity. He laughed against her hand and slowly removed it.
"Fine I won't talk right now – doesn't mean I won't bug you about it later," he said wagging his eyebrows at her. Natasha growled and shoved him out the door. He laughed as she continued to push him– a ruffled Natasha Romanoff was always amusing.
"Come on Steve we're going to be late!" Clint called over his shoulder.
"Yeah, yeah I'm coming. There's cheesecake on the table if anyone wants it – it's chocolate or something," Steve said tiredly walking down the stairs and dragging his feet as he followed after Clint. Natasha and Tony both raised an eyebrow at the drained Steve Rogers.
"Stop looking like a zombie Steve – it's freaking me out," Clint said slowly. Steve yawned.
"Shut up Clint – be happy I'm coming at all," Steve muttered as he walked out the door. Clint raised an eyebrow at the moody Captain. The man was temperamental without sleep – who knew?
"Bye Tasha. Bye Tony – don't kill each other while we're gone," Clint called over his shoulder as he caught up with a twitchy Steve – this was going to be an interesting meeting –especially if someone was going to try to talk to Steve. Boy were they in for a surprise.
Minutes after Clint and Steve left Natasha and Tony promptly glanced at each other and narrowed their eyes.
"I don't care if you can't talk Red - this changes nothing between us you hear me?" he said with an air of villainy. Natasha snorted - as if she wanted anything to do with Tony Stark period.
"And so with that said I hold nothing back and say - IT'S MY CHEESECAKE!" Tony shouted as he made a mad dash for the kitchen.
Natasha narrowed her eyes and took off after him - as if she was going to lose to an over pompous genius. Ha!
Tony burst into the kitchen and laid eyes on the prize - for all of 2 seconds before he was promptly tripped by an expert and smashed into the floor. He growled and spun around to grab her ankle to drag her down too. She quickly pulled a chair with her and crashed to the ground but instantly got free of his grasp as she heard a loud groan from behind her.
"Ack! I've been hit!" Tony groaned. He pushed the stupid heavy chair off of him and glanced up at the beautiful dessert - sitting prettily in his enemy's hand as she sat on the table in front of him. Tony banged his head against the floor.
Natasha silently cackled as she took another bite of the delicious chocolate cheesecake.
"I will get revenge!" Tony said shaking his fist in the air.
Natasha promptly pointed at the Avengers symbol in the center of the table with her fork. They were called Avengers for a reason. Tony scowled at her.
"Oh come on! Who the hell named us the Avengers anyway?" Tony complained banging his he against the ground once again. Natasha shrugged. More importantly who in their right mind would name their organization SHIELD when they had more weapons hidden away in unknown places then there were real shields in the world?
Natasha simply did not understand Americans and their weird naming systems.
"You know Red - I think this is the most civilized conversation we've ever had," Tony said suddenly looking up at the Russian spy with a spoon in her mouth.
Natasha paused in her victory snacking and gave him an are you stupid? look.
"Yeah I know you can't talk bu-" Tony paused as a sudden thought occurred to him and a devious smile spread across his face. Natasha groaned - here we go again. "Red - it is time for the greatest moment of my life," Tony said dramatically. Natasha gave him a blank stare - overdramatic bastard.
"I have waited 3 years for this moment of epic awesomeness. I have been secretly hoping for the day I, Tony Stark shall finally win a battle of wits between Mr. Awesome Badass and the evil spider queen -" Natasha promptly took out her phone and typed something up as he continued to monologue at her. People do that a lot lately since she can't exactly tell them to shut up.
"Where I will conquer the Avengers Tower and regain my title as most vicious and sarcastic professional insulter in the-" Tony got interrupted when he suddenly found a phone screen shoved in his face.
'Get on with it chickenshit,' the text said. Tony's mouth fell open in shock.
"Chickenshit? You dare call this handsomeness Chickenshit?" he exclaimed as he puffed his chest out in front of him and combed his hair back with his hands.
Natasha gave his dramatic pose a disgusted look and threw one of Bruce's notebooks that were lying on the table at the arrogant bastard.
"OI! Don't throw important documents at me you bat shit insane woman!" he shouted as he ducked. Natasha narrowed her eyes and wanted so bad to rip him into shreds. He paused.
"Oh right - you can't chew me out anymore. Whatcha going to do now little spy?" he taunted. Natasha finally cracked.
'You fucking man-child, I am going to bitch slap you so hard your devil children will feel it before they're even born!' Natasha mouthed at him even though no sound came out. Tony gave her angry silent raging a boring look - it just wasn't the same effect.
"I can't read lips Red but I don't think that was rated G at all!" he said pointing an accusing finger at her. Natasha literally had fire shooting out of her eyes.
'I'll show you G rated with my fist in your face you jackass!' she soundlessly shouted again shaking her fist in front of him.
Tony yawned. He was winning this battle already.
"Still can't understand you Red," he said staring at his nails. Natasha's eyes darkened as she nearly crushed her phone in her hand. She angrily flipped it open and started typing furiously. Damn him and his irritating ways.
Tony pulled out a crumpled note from his pocket as she viciously typed in front of him. He cleared his throat and started reading off his paper.
"Ahem. Red while you formulate your response there is something I always wanted to tell you - and it goes something like this. Roses are red and Violets are blue, you ain't no rose and you're violent too. You appear in my nightmares like a bloody red ghost. You make poor pitiful men shake in their boots in fear of being crushed by your monster caboose. I ain't a poet but you ain't one either so let's skip to the chorus before you burn a hole in my soul and cause hell to freeze over. You frighten little children and wield a damn gun like a freaky witch and her wicked wand. You scare the shit out shit and - hey are you done yet? I can talk so much faster than you can type! Ha!" Tony snickered childishly. Natasha growled as he continued his stupid list.
"Fire breathing cockroach!" he said with an evil smirk. Natasha glared daggers at him.
"Fat Russian beast!" Tony cackled at that one. Natasha's eye twitched as she finally reached her breaking point.
She was not fat.
Tony paled as she picked an orange off the table, pointed it at his face and promptly squeezed the life out of it with a dangerous look in her eyes. The orange of death - it was a promise of retribution.
Oh shit he understood that one too well - time to run.
"You'll never catch me alive!" he shouted as he dashed for the door.
BANG! BANG! BANG!
She wasn't planning on him staying alive.
nananananannanana. Run Tony run. Nanananananannanaa
5 horrifying minutes later.
Clint was back from his trip to SHIELD and somehow lost Steve on the way up to the Avengers floor as he went to die on his bed. Clint paused as he heard a loud crash come from down the hall towards Tony's lab. He heard a weird squeak followed by a bang.
He slowly walked towards the worrying noises and pushed open the door leading into the messy lab. He froze in shock. He nearly didn't believe his eyes as the scene in front of him. It was insanity! And yet at the same time a part of him was not surprised at all.
Natasha was literally strangling Tony Stark in his own lab. What the heck?
"Natasha what the hell are you doing?" Clint shouted in shock from the doorway.
Natasha and Tony both froze. She promptly dropped Stark's blue faced body on the ground and took a gigantic step back. Tony gasped in much needed air as he slid down the wall. Holy shit maybe he should have stopped at the song of Clint and Natasha sitting in a tree - she went wacko after that one.
Natasha glanced around and would've whistled if she could.
"Natasha..." he said warningly. Natasha pointed at herself - me? Clint glared at her pitiful attempts at trying to play down the situation.
"Who else was just about to choke their teammate to death?" he asked in disbelief.
Natasha shrugged - there was probably a line of people who wanted to kill Tony Stark. She was just much more efficient and the only one to ever come close.
That was success in her books.
"Don't you dare shrug at me Natasha Romanoff! What do you have to say for yourself?" he asked angrily. Natasha raised an eyebrow.
She then proceeded to literally pat herself on the back while giving Clint a dry look. Clint's mouth hit the floor.
"God I don't even know who is more childish! The boy who baits a fucking professional assassin or the girl who tries to kill a high profile billionaire!" Clint said throwing his hands up in frustration. Tony raised a shaky finger.
"I still g-get the last word d-dinky Russian spy," Tony wheezed from the ground.
"Oh for the love of god!" Clint banged his head against the wall beside him.
WHACK!
Natasha slapped Tony right across the face.
"Ah my face!" Tony cried in pain. Natasha glared at him darkly.
"Alright that's it! We're leaving!" Clint said as he promptly wrapped his arm around her waist and pulled her away from the abused genius.
Natasha gave Stark the finger as she was dragged away by her partner. The genius was so damn lucky Clint had come when he had!
"I hate you too you crazy Russian!" Tony shouted holding his flaming red puffy face in pain. Damn her slaps hurt like hell. Tony slowly fell to the ground with a groan - he was calling it a day. Bruce chose that exact moment to walk into their lab and froze as he saw the mess around him. He stared at his best friend lying on the ground looking like he just had the crap beaten out of him.
"You royally pissed Natasha off didn't you?" Bruce said blankly. Tony nodded from his pitiful spot on the ground.
"Yeah - but it was so worth it," Tony said happily even as he winced from all the bruises she managed to give him in 5 minutes.
"Sometimes I think you are a masochist..." Bruce said slowly.
"You should have seen her face when I got to the good insults!" Tony said with a pitiful victory fist pump. Bruce pinched the bridge of his nose.
"I don't know who is more insane - the man who likes to piss off all the women in his life until they literally beat him or the women who carry out the insane beatings..." Bruce said painfully.
"Let me know when you find out buddy," Tony said raising his hand from the ground.
Meanwhile Clint was not happy - not happy at all. In fact he was genuinely pissed at his stupid teammates and their life long feuds.
"1 hour! I leave you two together in a 50 floor building for one freaking hour," Clint muttered as he pulled her down the hall. Natasha scowled as she clenched her teeth beside him. She officially managed to calm down from her righteous fury after a couple minutes and tried to pull her hand out of his - yeah like that was happening.
"Nope," he said tightening his grip around her hand.
Natasha sighed - she lived will such over-dramatic men. One day this hypocrite had to realize that she was even more if not equally as dramatic as these idiots. She suddenly poked him the shoulder. He glanced at her questioning face as she pointed in front of them.
"Where are we going? We're going for a walk - away from any possible geniuses that have a very short life expectancy when you are in the room," he said shaking his head. Natasha rolled her eyes as he pulled her down the hall and towards the elevator. She watched him press the button for the ground and promptly shot her an unamused look. Natasha sighed and looked as sorry as she could when she really wasn't.
"Stop trying Natasha - I know you're not sorry," Clint said shaking his head. Natasha sighed - it was the truth. She glanced down at the crumpled sheet of paper she had ripped from the bastard's hand before she pummeled him.
Ding - it was her ticket to justification and back in Clint's good graces. She poked him again and held the sheet out for him to look at. He furrowed his brow as he took the paper from her hand and glanced down at the handwriting that did not belong to her. His eyes widened.
"Holy shit...does he have a death wish?" Clint asked in disbelief. Natasha snorted. That was a bit too accurate. He read through the infinite madness of Tony Stark and sighed.
"Still shouldn't have tried to kill him," Clint said shaking his head.
She gave him a blank look. Really? Clint caved after a few seconds of her frank look.
"Okay yeah, I would have tried to strangle him too after reading that," Clint said reluctantly. She nodded - exactly.
"But you still shouldn't have!" Clint said quickly. Natasha shrugged. You win some you lose some. Clint sighed in defeat - she was a lost cause. But then again he was a willing fool if that meant he could fight for this particular redheaded lost cause.
"Did you have lunch yet?" he asked as he pulled her through the front door. She shook her head - she was a bit...busy.
"Okay we can have some now - but first...give me your phone," he said holding out his hand. She furrowed her brow in confusion but handed over her SHIELD phone without much question. She may not always act like it but she did trust her partner - more than she trusted anyone else in her entire life. She watched him let go of her hand to pull off the back cover and take the battery out before he promptly tossed it into a garbage can beside them. She gave him a questioning look as he pulled out a new battery and stuck it into her phone.
"Battery was bugged," he said in explanation. She raised an eyebrow. He handed the phone back to her.
"Look over my shoulder. We have a friendly tail probably sent by SHIELD to monitor your health for the next few days- but you don't need him if I'm here," he said giving her a serious look. He would never let anything happen to her if he could help it. She glanced over his shoulder and just like he said there was a man that seemed just slightly out of place in the street crowds moving around them. "He's going to know we found the tracker when we start moving but his dot doesn't. I'm always running after you Natasha. Ready to run together for once?" he asked holding out his hand for her to take - by choice this time.
Natasha stared at his offered hand for a moment. Clint was always getting angry at her impulsive decisions and inability to stay in one place. She was always annoyed by his unnecessary worrying and over-protectiveness. But at the end of the day he never once truly forced her to do something she didn't want to do. From the very beginning it was always her choice.
"What if I put down my gun and walked away? What would you do? " Clint asked slowly staring at the Black Widow in also her darkness.
"I should shoot you before you became a problem," Natasha said darkly. He gave her a weak smile.
"But what would you really do though?" he asked softly. He watched her look away.
"I would ignore your mistake and think you are the most foolish assassin I ever met," she said through gritted teeth.
"It's not as bad as you may think it is - I quite enjoy being foolish," he said with a shrugged.
"Foolish people die," she said narrowing her eyes.
"Foolish people are sometimes the only ones who were ever truly alive," he said taking a step towards the guarded Russian. She took a step back and hit a wall.
"You are betraying your own side Barton," she said warningly. He laughed softy and shook his head.
"I don't have a side Natasha - I've been on both sides - they're all the same except on this side I'm allowed to say no," he whispered inches from her face. Natasha gripped her gun tightly as he leaned forward.
"Make your own choices for once Natasha Romanoff," he whispered in her ear as he took her gun and shoved it in his chest. "What is it going to be Natasha?" he asked quietly.
"What is it going to be Natasha?" he asked quietly in front of her. Natasha took a deep breath as the memories washed over her and his last words echoed in her ears. She stared into his patient blue eyes and she knew that he understood what she was thinking about. She slowly reached forward and intertwined their hands together without looking away. He gave her a warm look.
"Lets go," he whispered pulling her down the street.
BEEP. He glanced down at his own phone and quickly read a short message. He smiled softly and squeezed her hand.
The SHIELD agent assigned to watch over Natasha Romanoff froze as he stared at his tracker. His target wasn't moving on the screen but she was definitely moving fast in front of him. He glanced up just as a large bus blocked his view of two of the best SHIELD agents there ever was. When the bus passed the agent swore.
"Shit!" he growled throwing his tracker onto the ground. Hawkeye and Black Widow were gone.
Clintasha Clintasha Clintasha Clintasha Clintasha Clintasha
Somewhere in the underground subway track that ran along the entire length of the massive metropolis of New York City two people were quietly sitting next to each other looking like any average couple. Except they were anything but average.
Natasha tried to beat down the light blush that was threatening to take over her face as Clint continued to read and reread her message. It was embarrassing how he was still staring at the 7 little words. She tried to close his phone but he wouldn't let her.
"No - let me enjoy this message," he said shaking his head while still grinning. Natasha sighed and stared down at their intertwined hands - it was way too easy to please him.
'I choose to be foolish for once.'
- N
A/N: Haha Sometimes I feel like Clint and Natasha's relationship is even better when you watch them communicate in all these different ways. It forces you to see beyond their words and focus on their thoughts and actions. Haha Hope you thought this was cute and sort of funny in the middle!
Now back to studying for exams. Oh dear. O.O IF I DO NOT RETURN IT MEANS I DIED ON THE BATTLEFIELD OF THE PHYSICS EXAM! Farewell.