Disclaimers: Twilight © Stephenie Meyer. No copyright infringement is intended.
I apologize for the sporadic updates and the fact that this chapter is, once again, unbeta'd. Hope you enjoy!
Song: Famous, by Serena Ryder.
I Would Have Come with You
Chapter 3- I remember thinking that if she were to ever give me a second chance, I wouldn't take her for granted anymore. I would tell her what she meant to me, every fucking minute of every day! –YCTE, chapter 12
EPOV
When Bella arrived at the top of the stairs which directed the travelers to the exit of LAX airport, Edward was the first to spot her. Her clothes were wrinkled, and her long brown hair was tightened in a messy bun. She looked annoyed a bit. And bleak.
A vindicative part of him was glad for it. It proved that, even apart from him, she didn't seem to be happier. He honestly didn't know what he would have done if she had seemed better off without him. But his heart ached all the same; he hated to see her like this. Bella deserved to be happy, every damn day of her life…
His wife was holding both her backpack and their baby with one arm, trying to juggle with the overloaded stroller, which had a sleeping five-year-old in it and a bag of luggage that was about the drop from the carry cot under the seat. She approached the moving staircase, struggling. People was by-passing her in a hurry, not noticing that she could use a hand.
Right away, Edward sprinted towards the automatic stairs, climbing them faster than they were coming down.
"Hey!"
"Watch out," cried the people coming down, unhappy to be shoved aside, but Edward didn't really mind that he looked like a careless asshole right now; he just wanted to be reunited with his wife and family, and those people weren't compassionate enough to stop and help a struggling single mom, so Edward felt like he didn't own them any respect anyway.
Noticing the commotion in the stairs, Bella raised her eyes from the stroller – which had both wheels in the wrong direction – and gasped stupidly at the man now before her. People behind her waited impatiently.
"Edward," she exclaimed, "what—?"
"Hi, love," smiled her husband, somewhat amused, before he grabbed her soft face between his palms and kissed her soundly.
"Upfm—" was the only sound Bella could make as she blinked through the kiss. Letting go of her lips, he then proceeded to hug her, holding her to him like she was a lifeline.
"God, I've missed you," he whispered shakily. Bella wrapped her free arm around his waist, squeezing him to her, soaking in his presence. Her hand slipped under his cotton t-shirt, and she touched the warm skin of his lower back.
"Oi, can you move aside?" someone shouted behind them. It quickly burst their little bubble of happiness.
"Can't you just relax?" snapped Edward to the man with an annoyed frown – if people were all so self-centered and egotistical, then he could be too – but turned back to Bella and Juliet with a genuine smile.
"Dadada!" the little lady exclaimed joyfully. She was still wearing a pyjama – pink, with grey elephants – as that was the coziest way to travel.
His baby girl really was the cutest.
Edward chuckled and reached for her. "Come here, you." He took the baby out of Bella's arms, which allowed her to replace her backpack and purse, and he bend forwards to grab the luggage that was falling off the stroller. Now that the dead weigh was off, Bella could replace the stroller in the right direction and position it safely for the escalator.
"Was Emma asleep when you got off the plane?" Edward asked worriedly. He imagined how she would have had to deal with a sleeping five-year-old and a baby all on her own and frowned.
"No." Bella shook her head with a soft smile. "She just sat in the stroller… I don't even believe she's truly asleep," Bella confessed as they let the stairs bring them all down.
Edward raised both eyebrows and bend forwards to look at his eldest. Wearing a cute summer dress over leggings, Emma's red hair was up in the same hairstyle than her mom's. Her eyes were closed, but a devilish grin was slowly appearing on her lips.
"Oh you, little devil! You could have helped your mom, y'know!" He tickled her belly and Emma jumped awake with a shriek.
"Edward," Bella warned, conscious of all the stares they were attracting and how they were, once more, creating a small commotion in the escalator now that they were reaching the bottom of it. But Edward didn't seem to realise, and he took upon himself to take Emma out of the stroller and put her on his hip. The little girl instantly wrapped her arms around her dad's neck.
Taking the luggage out of Edward's loaded arms and placing it back into the now-empty stroller, Bella looked at her husband and smiled at how adorable he was with their two daughters up in his arms.
"So, how was Forks?" Edward asked Emma, adding an amusing grimace at the end. "Was it cold? Was it –ugh– rainy?"
Emma giggled. "Yes."
Edward pinched his lips and shook his head. "Tsk. I knew it."
Emma giggled some more. "Daddy! It's always rainy, that's just how it is."
Just as she said those words – her mom's words, really –, they'd walked outside of LAX airport and the heat wave hit them hard. Bella chuckled.
"You made your point," she said to Edward, smirking. His only response was to give her a cheeky grin. He hadn't smiled at all in the last three days, and he welcomed the change.
"The car's this way," he told Bella, and she followed.
Edward was the one to buckle Juliet up in her car seat while Bella put both the stroller and the luggage in the trunk. She watched him pat the baby's diaper and make a face, but ultimately, he seemed to think she could handle the ride home with her soiled diaper. It couldn't have been that bad, Bella thought, as she had changed her as soon as they got off the plane.
Emma was ransacking through her mom's purse and Edward stopped her. "What are you looking for, Em? Buckle your seatbelt."
"But I'm hungry," whined the red-haired girl.
"And your mom is not the snack-lady! Get out of her purse."
Bella chuckled to herself. This was exactly how she felt sometime. The snack lady. The responsible parent. The one carrying the mental load. But she wasn't being very fair, was she? Edward was a huge help. He had been incredibly busy lately, but he was still an amazing father, and he was on her side more often than not. She needed to start acknowledging what he did right and not only reproach him what he did wrong.
As parents, they were a great team. They always have been.
They all took place in the car and, ultimately, Bella got two packs of honey cookies in the shape of Minions out of her purse and gave it to the girls. Edward just chuckled, passing his fingers through his bronze-ish hair. Bella shrugged, "What?"
The words "snack lady" could be heard into Edward's fake cough.
-:-:-
Bella looked at her husband as he navigated them through the traffic. He looked clean and recently shaved, though exhausted. His gorgeous green eyes seemed lifeless when he wasn't making an effort to smile at her or at the kids, and he had dark circles under them. And even though it was impossible – for it had only been two days – he seemed older.
Noticing that his wife was staring at him, Edward forced a smile as he quickly peeked at her. He tentatively reached towards her and put his hand on her thigh, which seemed to startle her. But eventually, she smiled and placed her fingers through his. This simple gesture reassured Edward more than anything else had so far.
"Did it help?" he finally found the courage to ask.
Without having to ask what he meant, Bella answered without missing a beat. "Yes."
Edward's jaw went tight for a second, before he relaxed. Her quick reply could mean anything, really. It didn't mean that she had actually been happier in Seattle... happier without him.
"I'm glad," he said genuinely, and was rewarded by Bella squeezing his fingers gently. "Who did you visit?"
Bella smiled fondly. "Pretty much everyone."
Edward's smile didn't reach his eyes. "And… how are they?"
"They're great," said Bella with a nod. "They, uh—they miss us, but I think they're starting to realise that we're pretty serious about it all. The move. Your career."
Edward scoffed. "Yeah, well… about damn time."
"Yeah," Bella agreed awkwardly. They both could have use more support a few months ago.
"Your parents miss you," Bella dared to say after a few moments of silence. She didn't want to play the devil's advocate, but he needed to know.
Edward took his hand back from hers in order to grab the steering wheel as he looked into his left side mirror and switched lane to overtake a few cars.
"They know where to find me," he said, not caring that he sounded bitter. His parents hadn't minded flying to L.A. when his sister had moved here, in her early twenties. They had helped her and accompanied her during the move and visited often as she'd started University. Granted she had been a few years younger than what he now was, but she hadn't had two kids who missed their grandparents, though.
No. His parents were punishing him and hurting both he and his children. Edward wasn't going to be the one to offer the olive branch.
"He apologized for stopping lending us money, you know," Bella tried, hoping this would ease their discussion about his dad. Both men had said horrible things to each other.
"I don't give a fuck about his money," Edward growled.
Bella frowned at his language and turned her torso to look diagonally at Emma in the backseat. Directly behind herself, Juliet's seat was facing the other way; having reached the age to turn the seat around but not the weight, it was safer to keep her facing the back. Emma blinked her gorgeous green eyes at her mom and smiled, oblivious of her parent's heated discussion.
"You're not being fair," Bella said, turning back towards the front of the car and biting her lower lip.
"I'm not being fair?!" Edward blinked.
His wife shrugged awkwardly, and he was quite aware of her being uncomfortable by the turn their discussion had taken. "Your dad is your biggest fan, Edward. You know that. He just…"
She trailed off and he scoffed. "Just what?"
"He was just, er— startled by your hasty decision. We all were. You have to understand where we were coming from; no one really knew that you were being miserable."
She hated using that word. It was the word he had used to describe their life that infamous night and it had cut Bella deeper than she'd ever want to admit.
"Oh, that's rich," muttered Edward under his breath as he switched lane again and looked in his rear-mirror. For a moment, Bella wasn't sure if he was replying to her or commenting the traffic. "Is that what he told you?"
Bella didn't answer as she looked at the speeding red car that overtake them. Edward let it pass and swiftly switched lane to follow it.
"They are such hypocrites. My family knew perfectly well that I was discontent with the way things were, Bella," he went on, explaining it to her. "Hell, not two years ago, they were the ones suggesting that I do something about it! They even implied that I should divorce you. As if—"
"What?!"
Bella's startled outrage wasn't louder than a whisper, but Edward heard it for what it was: a distressed plea for him to rectify the meaning of that suggestion. He looked at her swiftly. She was gobsmacked and white, as if her blood had left her face, with dark eyes wide.
"They were mistaken, Bella. They got it all wrong." He passed a hand in his bronze-ish hair, remembering how annoyed he had been when his sister had approached him with that idea. "I mean, they saw how depressed I was, and they foolishly thought our marriage was the cause – heaven forbid it was the prospect of being a lawyer – and they suggested it, not knowing what they were talking about."
"They wanted you to divorce me," Bella repeated, ill-looking. Edward could see her mind working, probably reassessing all of her encounters with his parents, his family, and wondering how she never realised that they all thought he would be happier without her. Sweet, adoring Carlisle and Esme, charming Alice – all thinking she made their 'miracle boy' unhappy.
"They didn't. They tried to find a reason for my state of mind and jumped to the worst, wrong conclusion."
"But they thought that I was the one making you miserable." She hyperventilated.
"They really didn't," Edward repeated. "You were not. Bella." He waited for her to look at him, brown, deer-like eyes finding his. He looked back at her fiercely. "I never would've divorced you," he told her.
She blinked, shocked by his vehemence, and looked away. It was then she noticed all the red lights on the cars around them.
"EDWARD, WATCH OUT!"
The traffic in front of them had suddenly stopped. Edward's right foot crushed the break pedal in a rush of pure adrenaline. Their tires screeched. They plunged forwards; all of their torso being held by their seatbelt as they went from 77 miles an hour to zero.
They stopped only a few inches away from the red car in front of them.
"OI!" Emma cried in the back, startled. Juliet started to wail.
Bella's hands were in front of her on the glove compartment as if to steady herself. Edward left hand was on the steering wheel, his fingers stiff and white, his golden wedding ring cutting his fourth finger. His right hand was on Bella's chest, his instinct having kicked in and had futilely tried to protect his wife. His eyes snapped to the rear-mirror, checking if the car behind him was about to stop in time or if they should brace themselves for impact.
Fortunately, the traffic all slowed down without incident. Only Edward had been distracted.
"Shit," he exhaled, relieved. "Is everyone okay?" He turned in his seat to look at his crying baby girl in her car seat. His hand was still on Bella's heart which was beating hard.
"Yeah," his wife answered, turning to look at Emma who sat behind her dad. "You okay, Baby?"
Emma nodded, her eyes big and still frightened. "Daddy drives too fast," she whined.
"You're right. I'm sorry," said Edward, exchanging a glance with Bella. "I'm sorry," he repeated, meaning it.
"I know. It's okay." Bella forced a smile and turned in her seat in order to pass her fingers in Juliet's short hair and trying to calm her down despite her useless position. "Hush, hush, Jules. It's over, now, Sweetheart."
Edward focused back on the traffic who was slowly starting to move again. He passed his left hand on his mouth and jaw and cursing under his breath. Killing his entire family had not been in the plans for today.
They stayed silent for the rest of the ride, Juliet's startled wails subsiding to soft cries after a while. Eventually, she felt asleep.
BPOV
Bella's thoughts were reeling. At some point in time, Edward's family had suggested that he should divorce her. That shattered Bella's entire belief about the Cullens.
Things hadn't been all that great then. Hell, things weren't all that great now! But never Bella had thought about divorcing her husband. Nor did Edward, for all she knew.
Are you leaving me? He had asked her on the phone barely a few days ago, as if she could ever have answered 'yes'. It had never even crossed her mind. To separate for a while in order to think about their lives and reorganise them had been a heartbreaking possibility, but not an actual divorce. No. Never.
Just the word sounded so… final. She couldn't wrap her mind around it. And to think it had been so carelessly suggested by the Cullens – the family that had became hers – it felt like a betrayal.
"You okay, love?" Edward asked softly. Bella looked around, realising they had arrived home, and forced a smile.
"Yeah." Her voice was barely a whisper, and her smile didn't last. She willed herself to unbuckle her seatbelt and got out of the car. She opened Juliet's door to take her baby out and sighed when she realised that she was still fast asleep. Juliet didn't exactly need her morning nap anymore and usually just got by until after lunch, but today, she could use a nap alright, especially after her early morning and the plane travel. But her daughter always woke up when someone was transferring her from her car seat to a bed. Each time Bella, or her dad, or Seth had tried to take the sleeping toddler out of the car over the weekend, Juliet had blinked her gorgeous, full-of-lashes eyes to them and smiled.
Nonetheless, Bella started to gently remove the straps holding the baby, hoping to let her sleep. Jules wriggled right away.
"Hush," Bella sighed softly.
"Here, let me try," said Edward behind her. Bella took a step back and let Edward try his luck. The one-year-old fussed in her sleep as he grabbed her, but soon enough her head found Edward's shoulder and she rested there against his chest without so much as opening her eyes. Her little face and nose buried in her father's neck to keep the daylight out.
Bella went to the trunk and got her bag out, until Edward told her he was going to take care of it all once he got Juliet settled. Bella didn't wait for him to tell her twice. She grabbed Emma and followed Edward into the house. He quickly disappeared into the kids' bedroom and Emma ran to the bathroom with a shriek Bella was convinced would wake Juliet up. She grimaced. But when Edward exited the bedroom, he grinned and said, "Sleeps like a rock."
"Huh!"
Edward truly had some magnificent skills in moving slumbering babies.
He went back outside to retrieve the rest of their luggage as Bella looked around. The dishwasher she had filled and started on Friday was still full, with its "clean" light on. In her room, the bed was spotlessly made, the same way she would do it and not at all in the way Edward was known to do it – blanket just pulled up over the pillows in a hasty way. Walking toward the bathroom to see if Emma needed help with anything, Bella noticed the near-empty laundry basket, Edward's clothes from last Friday being its only items.
It looked like her house hadn't been lived in at all over the weekend. It was sad that she noticed such things so fast but having lived here – mostly alone – for the past few months, she tended to notice the changes Edward and the girls brought around the house. Now, it looked like their 2 bedrooms apartment had stayed unoccupied for the whole weekend.
"Hey," Edward said as he entered the bathroom and threw some of the girls' dirty clothes from their bags into the laundry basket. "What are you doing?"
Emma was long gone from the room, now, and Bella must've looked weird, lost in her thoughts in the middle of the bathroom. She looked at her husband as he was eyeing her worriedly.
"You're oddly silent," he pointed out, his eyes searching hers. "It is because of the divorce-talk or the quasi-accident?"
Without warning, Bella's eyes filled with tears. She had come so close to lose it all, in more ways than one, and her heart suddenly ached.
"Oh, Bells," Edward exclaimed before he wrapped her in his arms. "Wha—"
Bella's breath ended up on a sob and she buried her face in his shirt, passing her arms around his waist. Edward stopped talking and just held her for a moment.
Bella closed her eyes and two big drops of tears rolled down her cheeks, but that was the extend of it. While Edward held her to him as if she truly was one of his most precious possessions, she realised that what she felt, more than anything, was relief.
There was no car accident.
There was no divorce.
Edward's family didn't matter; he was the one who'd chosen to stay married to her.
Her breathing calmed and she straightened in his embrace.
"When was it?" she asked after a while, her hand coming flat on his chest. She didn't meet his eyes, focusing on her wedding ring instead.
"When was what?"
"When did your parents suggest the divorce?" she found the courage to ask, coming back to the conversation that had almost caused the accident.
She could feel the way he tensed. He looked angry for a moment, his features hardening.
"It was Alice, actually," he confessed, and Bella's heart dropped. She absolutely adored Edward's adopted sister and used to think it was reciprocated. "During the summer I came to L.A. to visit her with Emma."
Bella remembered that summer. She had just started an internship and hadn't been able to join them. Then she had gotten very sick… then pregnant.
Oh!
She took a step back, horrified, and looked up at her husband, wondering for a moment if people had had the right of it; had he stayed with her only for the sake of her second, unplanned pregnancy?
"I know what you're thinking," Edward said urgently. He took a step towards her and grabbed her face between his palms, not unlike at the airport earlier in the day. His expression, though, was more intense and serious. "Juliet wasn't the reason. You were. You were my wife, Bella. I wanted you to be my wife, remember?"
"Why?" she choked.
"Why?" he repeated, incredulous. "You have to ask?"
Bella wetted her lips. "Because of Emma?"
Could it be that he had married her because he had knocked her up and ended up not divorcing her for the exact same reason?
It all made sense, didn't it?
"Because of Em—" He repeated in a growl, so offended he didn't finish his sentence.
He looked like he was angry at her, and Bella didn't exactly know why. Getting pregnant – both times – hadn't been more of her fault than his. They had always agreed on that. Why was he resenting her, now?
And then she realised that it wasn't exactly 'resentment' he was feeling when his lips crashed on hers. The kiss was rough and desperate, passionate, and urgent. It was driven by their previous rush of adrenaline after their near-death experience and Edward's resolve to prove her something.
One of his hands left her face to wrap around her waist and he held her against him in an almost painful grip. His tongue invaded her mouth and Bella couldn't held back a moan. Her brain couldn't find a reasonable explanation for his behavior, but her body knew instantly how to react to such an 'attack'. Her hands caressed his abs and chest all the way up until they wrapped around his neck and grabbed a handful of hair. Edward's hands went down, kneading her bum until he grabbed the back of her tights and lifted her. He turned towards the sink and sat her down on the edge of the counter as he kept snogging her.
His big hands with long fingers raised once more and got tangled up in her heavy brown hair – she'd removed the scrunchies holding them up in a bun earlier in the car – and he pushed the strands out of his way as he descended his lips towards her jaw and neck. Bella's own hands pulled on his blue t-shirt to get it up and over his head. Both his hands and lips removed themselves from her body in order to get rid off of the bothering clothing, but they came back on her with a vengeance. Edward grabbed her breast hungrily and didn't even bother to unbutton her blouse before he forced it open, his lips descending from her throat to her cleavage.
With his red-hair head out of the way, Bella got a view of the bathroom. The door was open, she noticed, and she could hear Emma play in the living room. She gave the door a kick with her foot, not minding when her sneaker fell off on the floor. The 'bang' made Edward's head snap up. He looked at her, startled, before he looked at the door, then back at her with a sexy smirk, knowing her move was his cue.
He extended his hand and locked the door before swiftly grabbing Bella's waist and making her stand up. She removed her pants herself and looked at Edward as he struggled with his belt. She sat back up on the sink, trying not to mind the cold on her skin, and invited Edward between her spread knees when his own jeans and underwear rolled down to his ankles.
"God, I missed you," he breathed before she forced his lips down to hers once more. His hands were on her hips as he aligned himself with her and thrusted in. Both moaned.
It was uncomfortable. Bella would almost felt backwards into the sink itself if it hadn't been for Edward's hurtful hold on her waist. His thrusts were hard and impatient, chasing a quick release before their kids could interrupt them. His lips were everywhere on her lips, jaw, and neck, kissing and licking and sometimes even, biting. It was raw, and lust-filled, and fucking perfect!
Bella's orgasm crashed on her without warning. Her cries got stuck in her throat and all she could do was hug her husband to her, her small hands caressing his hair and back. Edward felt her. He relished in her reaction. His ardor calmed a bit, and he leveled his gaze to hers.
"Look at me," he told her tenderly. Bella blinked heavy eyelids but looked right back into his dark, green eyes. The side of his mouth lifted in a smile as kept up sliding in and out of her, making her gasp softly.
Having had her thirst quenched, Bella's mind geared up. He had missed her. He was making love to her – this was not just hungry sex anymore – and two years ago, when everyone told him it would be ok to divorce her, not only he'd refused, he'd never brough it up. Bella was starting to realise that Edward's way of not talking about a subject wasn't avoidance, but rather that it was unimportant to him. The same way he never told her about his music because he truly and sincerely believed nothing could come of it and it wasn't worth upsetting her. The same way he never clarified his reasons for marrying her in the first place.
Because to him it was obvious.
And he tended to take things for granted…
"Edward," Bella breathed, not sure she was believing what her brain was telling her. Could it be possible that he cared for her? More so than a boy who'd knocked a girl up and who was taught to do the right thing? Everyone had noticed how unhappy he was in Seattle. Everyone but her… and perhaps Seth. Was it because they were incredibly unobservant? Or was it because when Edward was with his family, his friends – with her – he did feel contented?
"Edward?" she repeated, wanting him to confirm her suspicions.
But of course, Edward had no idea what was going on in her head.
"Isabella?" he breathed with a frown, his eyes not leaving hers but quite clearly wondering what the hell she wanted to talk about right this moment while he was chasing his release. To shut her up, he kissed her some more. Deeply.
Bella moaned and arched under his tender assault, responding in kind, kissing him, and suckling on his tongue, his lips, and moving her pelvis. By the time Edward reached his peak and emptied deep inside her, Bella was rocking a second, smaller orgasm, feeling very contented herself.
Edward chastely kissed her shoulder, which amused her after the activity they just took part in. He straightened and took a slow step back. He caressed her cheek with his knuckles, savoring the moment before breaking the spell as he bent to retrieve his jeans.
Bella tried to button her shirt back up on her chest, frowning when she noticed that a few buttons were gone.
"We need to talk," she told him matter-of-factly. Gosh, they needed to talk indeed. If Edward had a habit to take things for granted, she was known to jump to conclusions and really, didn't that sum it all? They couldn't go on like this.
Besides, he couldn't keep on distracting her this way. It was fun, but unhealthy. How many times had he turned her away from a well-past due conversation by luring her into sex? If it was his way to communicate, she didn't always receive the message clear.
"Uh-oh," Edward responded, eyeing her with a smirk. "Am I in trouble?" He grabbed a button that was on the counter and handed it to her.
He was beautiful, Bella thought. His eyes were shining, his smirk was wicked and satisfied. He looked younger and more relaxed. But then his eyes met hers and he realised then that she was not talking about her shredded clothes. His grin fell.
"Right," he deadpanned.
Bella was opening her mouth to say more when the doorknob turned. They held their breath, but the locked door didn't open. That got the two parents moving faster and Bella quickly slip her pants back up as Emma's high-pitched voice reached them.
"Mommy, you do laundry?"
"Huh… yes, Hon," she called back. Edward sniggered, putting his t-shirt back on. He finished tying his belt, glanced at her to make sure she was presentable – she was only missing her shoes and a few buttons – and opened the door.
Emma grinned at him. "Daddy, I'm hungry. Can we go to the park?"
Edward chuckled, reaching towards his daughter to prevent her from entering the room, lifting her up on his hip. "What would you like to eat? I think there is not a lot left in the fridge."
Bella didn't keep on listening to their conversation; Edward had distracted Emma to give her some time alone. She used the toilet, then went to her bedroom in search of a new blouse as she tied her disheveled hair back into a bun.
When she reached them in the kitchen, Edward was filling a bowl with crackers. Emma smiled at her, and Bella went to kiss her forehead, passing her fingers in her gorgeous red hair, several strands of it getting out of her messy bun.
"Is that our lunch, then?" Bella asked playfully.
Edward eyed her. "Um," he hesitated, "there isn't much. I threw away our leftovers since it's been a few days…"
He turned his head toward the front door and Bella followed his gaze, seeing the garbage bag with the few leftovers from last week. She couldn't help wondering what he had eaten over the weekend, only to be remembered that it didn't seem like he had been home at all during that time.
She pursed her lips.
"Where did you go?" she asked. When he didn't answer right away, she tried, "Alice's?"
His green eyes avoided hers and he clenched his teeth. "The studio," he confessed as if afraid she would judge him or something.
Bella blinked. "All three days?"
He nodded stiffly. "I just left this morning."
"But you came back home Friday night?" She wanted to be sure.
He nodded.
"And you went back to the studio," she realised. He had called her, made sure she wasn't coming back right away, and gone back to his music. Must've been nice to have no obligations. "Alright," she said with an attitude, not succeeding in hiding her hurt feelings.
"Don't do that," warned Edward. "Don't jump to conclusions," he chastised her.
Bella shrugged. "What am I supposed to think?"
She'd confessed she was unhappy. Told him she wanted to go home. Left to clear her head and take a step back to think about their lives, hopes and dreams. And all he had done was to use the 'free time' to write more music. Like he had done all summer long. Like he had done since Aro had contacted him. No more, no less. It was all the same to him. Her feelings didn't matter. She didn't matter—
Edward was suddenly beside her. He grabbed her chin and make her look at him.
"If you think for one second that I didn't care that you were hurting, didn't care that you'd left, then you're wrong," he told her vehemently, putting a stop to her tormenting thoughts. "Look, I couldn't stop thinking about you. I didn't know what to do with myself with you gone." His eyes shone and vibrated with emotions. "I was trying to give you time. To give you your space, but I couldn't cope with it all. So yeah, I went to the only solace I could think of and spent the entire weekend at the studio, creating." He bent forwards touching her forehead with his. "Every one of those melodies is yours, Bella," he confessed. "Couldn't get you out of my mind."
When Edward stopped talking, Bella realised that they were both breathing hard. It wasn't even noon yet that this day had already taken an emotional toll on both of them. Edward had never been that chatty and open about his feelings and reasons before. Surely, he sensed that things were about to change – would need to change – if they wanted to move forwards.
Bella heard crunching sounds and chewing sounds and turned her head to look at their five-year-old daughter. Edward also raised his head to look at their kid, frowning a bit, as if he'd forgotten she was even there. Emma was silently eating her crackers at the counter, looking at both her parents with big, innocent eyes, clearly intrigued.
Bella stifled a laugh, giving Edward her attention once more. "Thank you for telling me this," she said.
Edward's focus went from Emma, back to her. They were close, almost hugging. They hadn't hugged in weeks, but today, it seemed, they couldn't get close enough. Perhaps that was why Emma was eyeing them, completely captivated.
"I thought about you a lot too, while I was in Seattle," Bella confessed. "Every one of my conversations ended up to be about you."
Edward frowned. That could work against him, and he knew it.
Bella reassured him, cupping his chiseled jaw in her small palm. "I chose to follow you here for your dream; I'm not turning on my words."
Edward let out a sigh of relief. "Thank you." A pause. "I know that you are hoping to hear me say that I chose you, too. I know it doesn't look like it at the moment, but Bella, I—I would be lost without you."
He hugged her.
Bella couldn't help but smile. He needed her. He cared for her. Perhaps as much as she did him. The past weeks – months, really – had been hard. A rollercoaster. It had made Bella doubt her choice, her relationship, her husband's feelings for her and worst yet, her own feelings for her husband!
A saying Renée used to say to her when she was younger suddenly came to mind.
"Love me when I least deserve it, because that's when I really need it."
Bella had always thought it referred to someone who was having some sort of break-down or depression, a sort of 'if someone is at rock-bottom, that's when they need you'. But now she realised that it could also refer to someone who was hard to love, who made questionable choices and was uncharacteristically selfish.
For Edward hadn't been very loveable lately. He had uprooted her whole life and had expected her to be happy about it. She'd tried to be optimistic and supportive, yet he'd called her bluff and it'd made him angry. He'd fight with his folks, ditched his friends, been careless with their money. He was becoming an absent father. He was selfish and a bit uncaring, belittling her needs. He was exigent.
Love me when I least deserve it…
He needed her more now than ever, that was obvious, for all those faults weren't usually his. She just wished she could understand why he was at his worst, now. Hadn't he gotten all he ever wanted?
-:-:-
Bella readjusted Juliet on her hip as she made sure the mac and cheese in the saucepan wasn't stuck to the bottom. It was the only meal she could think of, given her poor resources. Her groceries list was growing longer and longer.
Having had her fill with the crackers, along with some slices of cucumber that Bella had discovered in the back of the fridge, Emma was now back entertaining herself with her toys. She was such an independent little kiddo – not unlike herself, Charlie had pointed out one day.
Bella surprised herself thinking that she would have loved to hear Emma's thoughts on the conversation she and Edward had just had in front of her. If only she'd been older. She didn't doubt that her little girl would have been their own private cheerleader, hoping and rooting for them to patch things up nicely. For now, though, Emma was pretty oblivious to it all; Seattle or L.A., mom and dad were still together and loved her and took care of her. It was all that mattered.
On that front, Bella mused, they had done something right. Their small daughters didn't need to know about Mommy's inner turmoil and all of her doubts.
Bella looked at Juliet in her arms as the baby was chewing on a slice of cucumber full of saliva, using it to relieve the ache in her teeth, more like.
"What say you, Jules? Is Daddy worth it?" asked Bella with good humour.
"Cum-cum," blabbed her toddler.
Bella cracked up, her mind conjuring some salacious comebacks as she handed the little brunette another slice of cucumber.
It was at that moment that Edward re-entered the house, looking somewhat bewilderedly at his phone. It had rung earlier, stopping their conversation, and waking Juliet up. Edward had gone outside to talk in peaceful silence while Bella went to get and change their daughter.
"What's so funny?" Edward asked, looking at her somewhat fondly.
"Juliet is," Bella answered noncommittally. "Who was it?"
"Aro."
Bella made a face. "And what did he want?" She used the fact that Edward had walked closer to give him the baby and went to get some plates out of the kitchen cabinet.
"He listened to the work I've been doing over the weekend," her husband told her as he placed Juliet into her seat and gave her a cup of milk. Juliet trashed it on the floor on purpose, giggling. "Ah, come on, Baby," Edward whined. "You could've said no."
"You mean, my songs," Bella inquired with a smile, sucking on a finger that had gotten cheese on. Edward grinned back from his crouched position, wiping up Juliet's mess with a wet cloth.
"Yeah." He didn't offer more.
"Well, what did he say?" Bella asked impatiently after a while. She came from around the counter and placed the filled plates on the table. "Emma! Lunch's ready."
Edward took his place between both girls, in front of Bella, and made sure Juliet wasn't about to throw her mac and cheese bowl on the floor, too.
"He said it was my best work, yet. He's very pleased."
Bella grinned at him, a warm feeling of pride spreading in her chest. Her husband truly had a gift.
Edward didn't seem that excited though, which confused her. She eyed him openly while he fidgeted uncomfortably, as if there was more to say but didn't know how to bring it up.
Eventually, Bella got it, losing her appetite.
"You have to go."
Edward nodded. "Yeah…"
It was Monday. Normally, the girls would've been at daycare and Edward at work. He'd had his entire morning off; it shouldn't have surprised her that his boss was asking him to come in for the afternoon. The fact that he'd spent the whole weekend over was irrelevant for a man like Aro Volturi.
"I could stay," offered Edward.
Bella's answering smile was mellow.
"No, you can't," stated Bella, knowing perfectly well that if their situation were reversed, he wouldn't hold her back and she wouldn't have stay. Her thoughts went to Zafrina's contact card in her purse, and she realised that she still had a lot to tell her husband.
"We will talk when you come back," she told him, but somehow, it sounded like a question. The prospect of the two of them actually talking was both exciting and terrifying.
"Yes. We will," confirmed Edward.
EPOV
When Edward walked into the studio, he instantly noticed the effervescence in the air. Co-workers stopped doing whatever it was they were doing and looked at him with smiles or thumbs up.
Jane Moretti grinned at him when she saw him, looking a bit uncomfortable, but before Edward could ask any question, she grabbed her phone and signaled his arrival to Mr. Volturi.
"Send him in," Aro's voice reached them both with a jovial tone.
"What happened?" Edward asked with a frown. "Did you make sure no one touched my work? I wasn't quite done saving it."
Jane only nodded with a cryptic smile. She opened Aro's office door and let him in.
They were in a meeting, that much was obvious. If Edward hadn't been introduced to all of them, yet, he knew most of them by reputation only.
Aro Volturi, owner of Volturi Studio, film producer; Caius Volturi, film producer and director; Marcus Volturi, lawyer; Demitri Papadopoulos, film director; Felix McClean, music editor; James Hunter, sound effects editor (and renowned jerk!) There was another man that Edward didn't know, though he looked a bit like Jane with a different coloring – whereas Jane was pale and blond, this man had dark eyes and ebony hair.
"Ah, Edward! Misters, here comes our score composer," exclaimed Aro.
Edward's eyebrow raised high. "Oh, uhm—"
Aro cackled. "There is no need to act coy, my boy. What you wrote over the weekend is pure genius." He handed Edward a sheet of music scale – his own handwriting, his own song. At the top, scribbled hastily, was the title which taunted him.
i lose what i am when youre not around
Bella's song.
"I didn't write this for any movie," Edward started to explain, cautiously.
"Nonsense, boy. Come with me. Felix."
Aro pushed Edward out of his office and down the corridor with a paternal pat to his shoulder. Felix, Demitri, and the unknown man followed. They reached a studio booth and entered. Edward looked around curiously as Felix went and sat at the desk in front of many computer screens and an audio mixer. A movie started to play – Demitri's new film – and an angsty scene with skilled actors played out in front of Edward's eyes. In the background, going through a heavy crescendo, his composition played beautifully, fitting perfectly with the atmosphere of the scene.
"Of course, right now it's only the piano version," explained Felix. "Eventually, once you sign over the rights for us to use your work, Alec here would re-arrange the whole thing with a more epic, cinematic sound. Full orchestra, three or four violons for sure."
The man, Alec Moretti, nodded solemnly.
Edward just blinked.
"This, Edward," exclaimed Aro. "This is exactly why we wanted you to be on our team! Music theory can be taught. But a talent like yours is rare."
-:-:-
What a day, thought Edward when he went home later that night. He'd call his wife to tell her he would be late, and she'd been weirdly silent and unsurprised. She'd been accommodating him so much these past months, and her change in character had gone unnoticed by her husband until that morning three days ago when she had confronted him.
'Confronted' was a big word. They didn't argue or anything, she just told him she was being unhappy, and he had taken it like a personal attack. Then she'd left and took his children with her.
That had been a major wake-up call.
And now Aro just told him that, having been officially signed on a movie project, they were expecting him to work more hours, Edward dreaded announcing that news to Bella.
Sighing, he passed a hand in his hair and entered his home. The lights were turned off, except for the one above the oven. Delicious smell reached his nose; his wife had baked some goods for the upcoming week. If he had to guest, he would say those were blueberry muffins and perhaps a lasagna. She had done the groceries and the laundry.
With Bella having no job yet, she had taken upon herself to do more housework around the appartement. It had seemed like a logical balance and Edward knew that if she were to find work soon, he would've to take his load back.
He decided that he was going to bring her breakfast in bed, tomorrow morning.
He walked to his daughter's room, eyeing Emma sleeping peaceful in her bed, her cover stumbled on the floor. He went and replaced her blanket on her. Emma stirred but kept on sleeping. Edward kissed her head and turned to look at his baby… only to find her crib empty.
Frowning, Edward walked out and went to his own bedroom. Bella was on the bed, lying on her side, with her long, naked legs tangled in their sheets, her head in the palm of her hand as she watched the tv in the corner. In the curve her body formed with her knees bent, Juliet sat peacefully, playing with a soft tissue book which made crunchies sounds. Bella was caressing her little back absently, running a finger around one of the duck printings.
"Can't sleep?"
Both Bella and Juliet turned their head towards him at the sound of his voice, two pair of gorgeous brown eyes fixing on him.
"Teething," explained Bella. She was calm but tired, her expression a mix between exasperation and understanding. "I gave her Tylenol twenty minutes ago."
Edward nodded. At one-year-old, Juliet was almost done with teething. It didn't mean it was easier, as her gums were somewhat more solid and hard to perforate. It was what their pediatrician had explained, anyway.
"I'm gonna go get a shower, and then I'll take care of her," proposed Edward at which Bella gladly accepted.
He hurried in the shower, only wearing pyjama pants when he got out. He brushed his teeth and went to get Juliet, his mood instantly lightening up when he lifted her.
It was way past 9 PM and his baby was obviously tired. Her little brown head found his shoulder as soon as he cradled her in his arms, and he could feel her little mouth suckling on her fingers in the crook of his neck. He walked out of the room with the babe, going to the living room to the rocking chair. Behind him, Bella stretched in the bed.
If he thought she would go to sleep, he was surprised to see her walk out of their bedroom a few minutes later, wearing only one of his old shirts, as was her habit. She tip-toed into the kitchen and put some water to boil.
So, she really wanted to talk, tonight.
"Shush," he gently hummed when Juliet stirred in his arms. He grabbed her blanket and rolled it against her little body, so she'll feel safer and more comfortable. He placed it strategically to block the kitchen light out of her eyes.
His eyes followed his wife as she made two mugs of tea and brough them into the living room, placing his on the low table. She sat on the couch, her legs crossed under her, holding her mug as she looked at him and Juliet with a cautious but affectionate smile.
Neither of them said a word while he put the baby to sleep. It was a reprieve, a peaceful moment filled with anticipation.
Eventually, though, Juliet did fall asleep. The hand she had in her mouth went limp and her arm fell on Edward's chest. Her whole body was soft, her breathing deep, her long eyelashes on her chubby cheeks.
Edward knew he was biased, but Gosh, he and Bella made the most beautiful babies.
Bella chuckled, as if she could guess what it was he was thinking right now, and he got the idea that it was pretty obvious just by the way he was currently admiring his daughter in awe. He winked at his wife, and she huffed a laugh. Slowly, he stood up and brough the little darling to her bed.
When Edward walked back into the living room, Bella hadn't moved, silently drinking her tea. He sat beside her on the couch, took one sip of his own mug, before he placed it back on the table.
"You wanted to talk," he said tentatively.
She nodded, eyeing him. She was on the side of the kitchen, which mean the feeble light was in her back, hiding her features from him.
"Shall I start, or you want to do it?" Bella asked him. It was a fair demand, for there was a lot he wanted to tell her. And then there were stuff he ought to tell her – starting with the new project Aro had just signed him on that was about to take even more of his time.
"You can go first," he said instead. Cowardly.
She made a face, not that Edward could really see it. "There are a number of things," she warned. Edward nodded, bracing himself for it.
"I—I sort of came upon a realisation today," she started feebly. "You told me your parents were aware that you've been discontent with the way things were."
"Yes."
"Because of me, they'd thought."
"They were wrong," he restated. "It wasn't because of you. Never."
She nodded with what he thought was a small smile, not that he had a clear view. "I've been talking with Seth over the weekend and realized that, like me, he didn't see it coming at all. We both thought you were alright with the way things were, which was why it surprised us so much when you didn't even take the time to think things over."
Edward nodded. Bella went on, "Neither one of us realised you were unhappy. Not this last year, not even before Juliet was" – conceived – "born."
Somehow, she seemed ashamed of that fact, as if as his wife and closest friend, they should've known. Edward cringed inwardly. 'Of course not,' he wanted to say. His miserable state was mostly reserved for his classes and team's project. At home, with his girls, with his hobby and keyboard, as well as with his best friends and their surfing adventures, he was happy. Truly.
"I couldn't help but wonder if it meant that… you weren't miserable when you were with me – with us."
Edward blinked, not believing what she was telling him; that she didn't know!
"Bella," he sighed. "I thought that was obvious."
"Was it?"
There was a long silence. It stretched long enough to make Edward uncomfortable as a realization descended on him.
"If you didn't think so," he started, his mouth dry, "it means you thought that my being miserable in Seattle was because of you…?"
Bella blushed and shrugged.
"If so, then what went through your head, exactly, when you asked me to choose between you and my music? You—God, Isabella—you thought I was using this to get away from you, didn't you?"
He placed a hand on his mouth, disbelieve and apprehensive, his eyes fixed on their mugs of tea. "Fuck," he breathed with horror.
"It would've made sense," Bella whispered, hurt. "You were only with me out of obligations, after all."
"Would you stop saying that!" His outburst surprised them both. Bella stayed silent for a few seconds, allowing him to elaborate if he'd wanted to, but Edward chose not to.
Sighing, Bella went on. "Angela—"
Edward groaned, and Bella stopped, eyeing him harshly. "Angela," she started again, "said something that made me reflect on our situation."
His wife's best friend hated him. Anything Angela Weber had to say couldn't be used in his favor.
"You said something similar this morning," Bella continued, making him frown.
"What did she say?" Hell, what did he say that would agree with Angela Weber?
"She said that, while I'd chosen to follow you here, you went and choose your music career. And I think that she's right, and that, if I hadn't made the choice to follow you, you still would've chosen your music career. Over me and our family."
Shit. Was he supposed to reply something like that?
He didn't have to, Bella continued: "She said that – hopefully - you were grateful that I went with it, but couldn't bother to show it. You're taking me for granted."
Edward sat closer and took her hand, but before he could open his mouth, Bella continued.
"She also said that it was natural to feel the way I do, because we decided so fast and changed our whole lives and left our jobs, family and friends behind. Our whole support system. It was supposed to be an adventure that we would live together but… you're the only one living it."
"Bella—"
"You yourself said, this morning," she continued, not letting him interrupt, "that you were aware that I wanted you to pick me, but that you couldn't at the moment—"
"No," Edward interrupted. "That's not what I said." Bella frowned, confused, but let him speak. "I said that it didn't look like it at the moment, but that I needed you."
"Needing someone and picking them above all else aren't the same thing."
"You're right." After all, she had picked him above all else, but she didn't need him.
Not the same way he needed her. But she had chosen him, why? Because she loved him? Could that be the reason? She'd never told him as much, but neither did he and he loved her like crazy. Had loved her for years!
The door was wide open, now. All he needed to do was to get the words out.
He sat closer to her and passed his free hand on the nape of her neck, as if he couldn't help but touch her. His second hand was still holding hers.
"Bella," he sighed her name, trying to reassemble his thoughts. "I understand what you're saying. I get what you'd tried to do back in April, when you asked me to chose between you and my possible music career. And I want to tell you that I would have picked you, but I can't be certain. I remember my state of mind when I thought you were giving me an ultimatum, and Bella, I was a mess. It's not far-fetched to think I would've done something foolish."
"You wouldn't have chosen me," Bella restated, sounding like she'd just received a fist in the stomach. "You would've left.
"I don't know," admitted Edward unwillingly, hating himself. "But if I had, it would've been the biggest mistake of my life."
She'd saved their marriage with her decision; he knew that at least. He'd asked a lot out of her, she was right when she said she'd put her whole life on hold to accommodate him, and he had thanked her poorly.
"You gave up so much for me," he whispered, in awe, his forehand landed softly on her.
His wife shrugged, admitting with a small voice, "It wasn't so bad of a sacrifice, at first."
At first. Edward's heart missed a beat.
"But you expected more?"
Bella's lips pinched. They were short on money, their apartment wasn't their dream house, she struggled to find a job. None of those facts were unexpected. Edward's change of demeanor had been the biggest let down, to be honest. She wished she could understand it. "No. Not more. I just wanted you," she clarified.
Edward's eyes scrutinized her face. "You have me," he said.
"It doesn't feel like I do." She closed her eyes.
"Ah, but you do, Bella." His hand on her neck tilted her head up and he kissed her lips. The kiss was soft, and filled with tenderness, and yet Bella pushed him away.
"Don't do that," she said, echeoing his words from that very morning when he had chastised her for jumping to conclusions.
Edward frowned at her sudden plea. "What?"
"Don't let your actions speak for you," Bella explained. "Use your words, Edward."
"My words?"
Bella nodded with her eyes strangely wet. "Don't make me guess…"
"I don't understand—"
"Yes, you do!" She argued feebly. "Just tell me."
Edward's brain geared back, trying to understand what it was she wanted to hear. What were they even talking about before? "You have me, Bella. I'm yours."
Bella's hopeful expression felt, as if she'd wanted to hear something else. But then her shoulders straightened, and she continued the conversation without missing a beat.
"You are never here. The girls miss you; I miss you. You pushed everyone back home away, you're impatient, you're one-minded, you're ungrateful. I don't feel like one of your priorities and I want that to change."
Edward blinked at the assault and his hands left Bella's body in order to run them both into his dishevelled hair.
"Wow, okay."
Bella chuckled nervously. "Sorry."
"No, no. That needed to come out."
Bella gave him a sheepish smile. "I just don't understand you, Edward. You wanted to come here for your music career, you uprooted our whole life for it, and now you're here, you made it, and it changed you… well, not for the better."
"I haven't made it yet, though."
"What?" Bella frowned.
Her husband sighed deeply. "It's just… I can't mess this up. If I fail, it means everyone was right, and I'm just a foolish boy with my head up in the cloud." They both knew that that 'everyone' referred especially to his Dad, though it was thoughts Charlie, Angela and Seth had also shared at some point. Her husband was having daddy-issues, she realised. It just served to remind her how young he was. They both were, really. "It'd mean that I'd asked you to quit your life in Seattle, your friends and career, all for nothing," Edward continued. "If I fail, all our sacrifices would've been done for no-fucking-thing."
He had become agitated while he was speaking and Bella grabbed both his moving hands in hers, bringing them to her lap.
"Edward," she said, rising on her knee on the couch in front of him and put both her small hands on his jaw, palms on his neck and fingers on his rough cheek. Edward's hands automatically grabbed her waist.
She tilted his face up to hers.
"You're putting too much pressure on yourself. No one is expecting you to become world-renown famous. There is no way you can fail this. I followed you here for your dream job; I would've done this even if you'd told me you wanted to be a Mickey Mouse mascot at Disneyland. As long as you're happy, this move is worth it. You're worth it. And you got nothing to prove to anyone."
Edward's eyes blinked on their own accord as he looked at his beautiful, amazing wife. All the pressure he had been under since last April just seemed to lift his shoulders. Aro was impressed by his work and so far, things were going smoothly in the way he had hoped, but had he come to L.A. just to write silly music and jiggles or others, Bella would still be here at his side. She'd chosen him. For better or for worse, she'd picked him. He had nothing to prove. He had nothing to prove to her.
Edward's arms encircled her waist and back, and held her to him, his face hugging her chest as he exhaled a sob. Bella just held him close, her fingers caressing his hair.
"Hush," she was saying softly. "It's okay. We're gonna be okay."
Edward wondered a moment why she was consoling him like he was a small child when he realised that all the relief had left him crying in her nightshirt. She must've felt the tears through the fabric.
"I'm sorry, Bella," he said in her embrace, his voice muffled. "I haven't been a good husband lately, but I love you so much."
Bella's fingers on his scalp stopped moving. Her whole body became immobile. Edward realised and pushed his torso away. Bella's eyes found his, wide but guarded, her lips open on a silent question.
Edward smirked, self-depreciatively, well aware that he had never told her in so little words, in such a clear fashion. "I do. I love you. So fucking much—"
His last word was muffled by Bella's attack of his lips with hers. He chuckled as his whole body was pushed backward toward the arm of the couch. Bella climbed on him, her naked thigh advancing on his pyjama-clothed lap, and attacking his lips, his face once more imprisoned between her soft palms. He let his own hand roam over her body until they grabbed her face also, reciprocating the kiss with emotion.
What a day!
She deepened the kiss for a few moments before she had to let go to breath. Her soft cheek grazed his rough one as she brought her mouth to his ear, and there, very softly murmured, as if she'd never dare the words before and didn't quite feel comfortable to say them out loud just yet, she breathed, "I love you, too."
Gosh, this felt glorious.
Edward closed his eyes and held her to him in a sort of hug, even though their position reflected more of a sexual pose. This moment was more than that.
BPOV
Later that night, as they lay naked and sated in their bed, Bella's head turned his way. Edward was slowly dozing off, a hand on his chest, the other over his head on the pillow. He was looking at the ceiling, pensive, but then his eyes closed off as if on their own accord, his long eyelashes touching his cheek.
Bella still couldn't believe he had told her he loved her. It had seemed, all through the day, as if he did, and was on the verge of telling her but didn't dare. But Bella had pushed for it, again and again, to the point where it wasn't subtle anymore. Fortunately for her, Edward had finally seemed to catch up and said the words she'd needed to hear.
What she hadn't expected was for how hard it was for her to say it back. For years, she had kept those feeling to herself, hiding them, even. Now that it was the moment to say them out loud, she struggled.
Which was absurd because she truly loved him. Oh, gosh, how she loved him! Even at his worst, which was a relieve to finally understand why he had been this way lately. The pressure he had put on himself, the fear of failure, she could hardly imagine what that must've feel like.
Bella turned towards her husband and brushed a stand of hair out of his face with the tip of her fingers. His green eyes opened again, and he send a lazy smile her way.
"A Mickey Mouse mascot as Disneyland, really?" he suddenly asked with mirth.
Bella giggled. She never giggled like that. So girly and amused and care-free. But Edward's train of thought had startled her. She understood his confusion; had he asked for that specific profession the same way he had his music career, of course she wouldn't had taken it seriously and would have jumped to the same conclusion than she did at first, last April, when he'd told her about his music – that he was just trying to get rid of her. But had he told her of his dream and aspiration… well, why the fuck not? She was honest when she'd said she only wanted him to be happy.
"You would have made a good Mickey Mouse," she simply said.
Edward smirked and turned on his side to face her. "Are you kidding? I would have been a great Mickey Mouse," he deadpanned.
She smiled and saw Edward's eyes be drawn to her lips, which was his telltale sign that he was about to kiss her. And indeed, his mouth landed on hers a second later.
"I want you to be happy, too, you know," he confessed in a caress, his face still so close to hers.
She nodded; she knew that.
"I'll get there." She was trying to convince them both. "Oh! I forgot to tell you: I met Zafrina in Seattle."
Edward's drowsiness seemed to leave him as he looked at her with renew interest. "Yeah?"
"She said I could use her name to back me up in my research of a job. She even gave me a name. Senna. I think she must work for the branch of my editing house here in L.A."
"That's great, Love!"
"Yeah," said Bella with a hopeful smile.
Edward's smile didn't disappear per se, but it diminished as his eyes moved over her naked body, which was only hidden by a light coton sheet. Though he was admiring the view, Bella realised it was his way to avoid looking at her eyes.
"You know, this afternoon, when I had to go back to work…" he started tentatively.
"Uh-uh," Bella encouraged him to continue.
"Well, they signed me on a film project. I'll be the main score composer for it."
"Edward! That's even greater!" she exclaimed, awkwardly wrapping her arms around his neck and shoulders in a congratulations hug.
"Thanks," he chuckled, exhaling a relieved breath. He pushed her away a bit to look back at her. "But… that also means I will have to be at work – a lot."
Bella opened her mouth to say something, but Edward cut her short.
"I know you told me I had nothing to prove to anybody, but we're still working on a schedule for the movie's release date. If only for myself, I cannot screw this up, Bella."
"I know," she said. "I understand, babe." And she did. For their whole marriage, she had been the one career-oriented while Edward was depressingly going to law-school, excelling at it but not being motivated. To see him so invested and wanting to succeed in his career of choice was a nice change, and one Bella could hardly begrudge him. "And I'll be there to support you."
He smiled then, his lips stretching up to reveal his slightly crooked but perfect teeth, his green eyes shinning with youth and happiness. "I love you," he said, his palm cupping Bella's cheek.
Bella's response was to kiss him. He chuckled, a low sound in the back of his throat, as she attacked him back to his pillow, half-climbing on top of him. It was a mirror image of the reaction she'd had earlier on the couch and he seemed to enjoy the effect his words had on her. Bella realised that she'd just given him a new weapon to get away from a fight, but at the moment, she couldn't care less.
The kiss ended but Edward still held her to him. She was laying on his chest, her face away from his in the crook of his shoulder, her fingers wrapped around his bicep.
His fingers half-caressed, half-tickled her spine.
"Bella?"
"Hmm?"
"You told me you didn't feel like one of my priorities." A pause. "How do I change that?"
Bella smiled but stayed silent for a minute, thinking her response through.
"Be here during the evenings; the girls need you. Be the father I know you are."
"I'll try."
"Don't just try, Edward. This is non-negotiable. You could go back to work at night, or early in the morning – I can manage the morning-routine on my own – even the weekend if need be. But be there for your children each day, not just when you have time. They grow-up so fast."
They both thought back to a few days ago when she'd announced to him that Juliet had walked and how anti-climatic this event had been.
"You're right. Of course, you're right."
Bella smiled, though Edward couldn't see her. "What else?" He asked.
Tentatively, she said, "Call your Mom?"
He signed, but ultimately, he said, "Agreed. What about you, though?"
All her conditions so far had been about his children and his parents. Though they were important ones, it was true it wasn't about her per se.
"Uhm… Stop taking me for granted. Don't live your life parallele to mine; include me. Show up to important events and occassions." She remembered his and Emma's birthday with a bitter taste in her mouth. What else did she want from him? Would she dare to ask? Oh, yes, she would: "Tell me you love me once a day, so I don't forget."
"Done," Edward answered without missing a beat, a smile in his voice. Then he added, "I love you."
Bella giggled. The mood had suddenly shifted, and after those simple but important conditions, she added a few more silly ones: "I want to change the color of this room. Paint it green or something."
Edward laughed, looking around at the mustard colored-walls of their bedroom.
"That goes without saying."
"I want to go to the beach more."
"Alright!"
They both stopped talking then, and Edward moved them in order to be able to see her face. Her chin laid on her hands on his chest.
"Is that all?"
Bella bit her lips, not quite knowing what to add. "For now."
Edward nodded solemnly. "That shouldn't be too hard then. I don't know what I was expecting, but you have reasonable demands."
Bella rolled her eyes. She didn't think she ever was an exigent wife, anyway.
"Who would have thought," she deadpanned with a sarcastic smile, "communication truly is key!"
To be continued…