We'll fight, we'll never give up

Santana had to be a really cynical to say she had no idea how they got to this point. The point where Rachel said the words she'd been afraid to hear for three years, and it was her damn fault. She was so stupid for giving all of those people who never thought they would work together the right to brag about how right they were when they said it. She screwed up the best relationship she'd ever had because she couldn't just keep it in her pants. She was a cheater and she didn't know how to beg for forgiveness knowing she didn't deserve it. She didn't have the courage to even look Rachel in the eyes.

"I'm waiting for you to say something, Santana."

Santana shook her head. Rachel was always waiting for her. Rachel was always fighting for her. Santana could see how much it hurt Rachel to have all her efforts waste at the end when she got disappointed over and over again. Santana needed to stop hurting Rachel, but that only meant losing Rachel and she didn't want that either.

"I forgive you" Rachel said after a moment, making Santana look up quickly.

"What?"

Rachel started to pace in front of her, nodding. "Yeah, I'll—I'll forget about this, and I—-"

"Rachel, no—"

"Shut up, Santana, shut up!" Rachel snapped. "We're not going anywhere if we just sit here thinking in how miserable this whole situation is making us. I have to do something!"

"I cheated on you, how can you—-"

"I am aware you fuck someone else, Santana, I don't need a reminder, don't be such a cynical bitch!"

Santana huffed looking away from Rachel, crossing her arms. She heard Rachel take a sharp breath and the couch dip beside her.

"Look at me" Rachel said, her voice soft this time. Santana obliged, her gaze softening when she saw Rachel's wet eyes. She swallowed hard because she preferred Rachel yelling than crying. It was just so unbearable. She squeezed her sides to stop herself from pulling Rachel towards her body and hold her.

"I love you, and I—" Rachel's voice broke and Santana reached out hesitantly to take her hand. She sighed with relief when Rachel squeezed her hand tightly instead of pushing her away. "I need to fight for you, I need to—I want you with me. We're getting married, Santana."

Santana shook her head when Rachel broke down in sobs, and after thinking it too much, she pulled her towards her body, embracing her tightly. Rachel sobbed uncontrollably, clutching at the front of her shirt.

"I'm so sorry" Santana whispered, kissing her head. "I'm so, so sorry"

She let her tears rolled down her cheeks, closing her eyes. She didn't have the right to ask for another chance. Rachel gave her too many chances; even more than she deserved.

Rachel pulled away, and kneeled on the couch, taking Santana's face on her hands. "I'm not giving up. I decided and you don't have a say in it"

"Rachel—"

"Shut it" Rachel said, putting one of her thumbs over Santana's lips. "She doesn't mean anything to you. She doesn't mean anything to you." Rachel made a pause to take a deep breath, looking desperately into Santana's eyes. "She doesn't. Say it"

"Rachel—"

"Say it!" Rachel snapped, shaking Santana's face.

"Of course, she doesn't, Rachel. She doesn't mean anything to me."

"Then it's alright. You have another chance. You can't screw it up this time"

This saddened Santana so much. Rachel was trying to save something that was doomed to break apart. Santana wasn't about to let her.

"I don't think we should do this anymore. You deserve someone better. You have given me too many chances and I think this is too much for you to forgive." Santana told her, sincerely. Any other time she would have accepted without saying anything. This time it was too much, she wouldn't be able to live with the guilt.

"We'll fight, we'll never give up" Rachel said, her voice breaking. Santana felt a knot in her throat remembering Rachel's marriage proposal that never failed to make her weak at the knees. "We promised that, remember? I can forgive this because I care about you, I love you."

"I love you, too"

"Then fight with me." Rachel told her, kissing her on the lips. "Fight with me"

Santana nodded, receiving her in her arms again. Rachel rested her head on Santana's chest, her body trembling slightly. Santana closed her eyes, feeling so miserable for making her cry, for hurting her. What she did was unforgivable. She didn't deserve for Rachel to take her back. She deserved to be thrown out of Rachel's life; but as she held her, she prayed for them to be able to get through this, or for Rachel to realize she deserved better, because as long as Rachel kept finding reasons to stay, even when she was so good at giving her reasons not to, Santana wasn't letting her go.

A/N: I know, I know I have to update LCIL, but I've been so busy with college. I have the next chapter almost done, but something is still missing and I don't want to put it up just because I need to update. Be patient with me, okay? When this crazy semester ends I'm gonna be able to update the story.

Also, this is my entry to Pezberry-week AU. Luckily I had this one already written and it fits, so that's good.