I do not own Once Upon a Time.
I want to thank you for all the support I'm receiving! :)
When Belle came out of the building, the light rays focused directly on her face, revealing to her eyes one exuberant morning that seemed to mock her.
People were already walking the streets around her, life went on its usual pace without hesitation.
Belle shrank, trying not to draw anyone's attention, wishing she could be invisible, but it seemed that there was a strip on her face saying "German whore", and everyone noticed her presence, as she tried to leave that place unnoticed.
She felt humiliated, devastated... Broken. She had lost all her soul in that damn room, and just thinking in the face of Gaston, the pleasure he felt when deflowered her, as she screamed in agony, made her stomach roll. She could barely walk, feeling that every step she took, her legs became more wobbly; she was almost fainting.
Each person who walked past her, looked at her with disgust, as if she was a prostitute.
But sleeping with a German, with the enemy, did not cause her to be so low as to those women?
What had she done? The only thing she expected was that James and Mary Margaret were well, and that her sacrifice was worth it; she just wanted both were alive...
Perhaps if she had not gone to talk to Ruby nothing would have happened ...
No. She could not stand to think that way. She should learn to live with this emptiness... With this burden she would carry on till the end of her life. Nobody would protect her...
Protect her...
Another thought crossed her mind. Perhaps now she would have strength enough to do it... Gold didn't protected her. He was the culprit. Without a soul or a heart to worry about, Belle could kill Gold. Would not it?
Belle felt her body lose the rest of the force that kept her upright, and she staggered into an alley. She fell to her knees near the wall of one of the buildings, next to a garbage and vomited. Just thinking about all that had happened, she felt a knot were forming in her stomach, and she vomited even harder. She did not hear when a car pulled up next to the street, and steps approached her slowly.
She felt her body extremely weak, the last traces of her strength fade. She knew she wouldn't reach the house of James.
Belle saw a figure in front of her. Trying to compose herself, she tried to focus her vision in the person.
"Miss Chesneau, are you okay?"
Oh, no! She knew that voice... Was the driver of Adrian Gold, the boy named Jefferson. He looked worried, which made her feel even more helpless.
"Yes, I am .." Belle stood tottering, and tried to walk, but her body was too weak.
"No, you're not!" Jefferson caught her before she fell in the floor.
Belle wanted to protest when she realized that Jefferson held her in his lap, lifting her and taking her inside the car. She didn't want to see Adrian Gold. Never again. But she couldn't find her voice, and her eyes were weighed, and she succumbed to exhaustion.
While alternated between consciousness and unconsciousness, accepted that death would soon arrive. But she was dying?
She saw that she was in a car, she was being taken ... Where was she going? Where was she?
And again, she knew she was suffering from hallucinations while her soul was preparing to leave her body. An angel with black hair hung over her, placing a piece of cloth deliciously cold over her forehead and pouring water through her parched lips. The same dream persisted endlessly while the angel lifted her and carried her to a bed, and she began to feel calmer, less hectic and more comfortable.
Belle woke with a jolt, not recognizing the place around her. She needed to know where she was. But when she commanded her body to move she received no response.
"Calm down..." One hand rested on her shoulder, forcing her to lie down again. Belle looked at the person in her front, but her eyesight was blurred, forming a strange blur. But she knew it was a woman and that her voice… Appeared to be a woman about fifty years or more. "Go back to sleep honey. You are very weak... Try to rest."
The woman returned to put the wet towel on her forehead and Belle went back to sleep.
And there was that angel again, making company. At some point, she felt that the angel gently slid his hand across her face, bringing peace to her.
And, again, she woke up, and saw that the roof was still above her head, but not spun and was no longer a blurred image. For the first time, something seemed solid. Belle thought she still was not dead, but was miserably stuck to that life.
"Ah, you're awake!" Said a man's voice beside her.
She turned her head and saw a beautiful pair of brown eyes. The face surrounding the eyes were framed by black hair slightly gray. That was the angel with whom she had dreamed. Actually, it was Adrian Gold.
Belle closed her eyes tightly, trying to give in to sleep again, but she couldn't. She would have to face her fears. How she arrived at the hideout of the beast?
"Isabelle, are you okay?" Gold slowly approached the bed, assuming that she had closed her eyes because she was in pain. "The fever abated somewhat" He vouched, laying his palm on her forehead; his face was serious, and Belle could see the worry etched in his eyes.
Belle posted immediately on alert. She tried to sit up, but he stopped her, shaking his head.
"Please, Isabelle, stay calm. Tell me, how are you feeling?"
"I..." Belle coughed, trying to find her voice, which was stuck in her throat. She would say she was feeling well, but... She was feeling better?
Oh no, she was far from feeling that way. She would never be fine, never would be okay. Gold didn't look away from her, waiting for an answer. The bloody images of last night crossed again in her mind. Before he could see the tears that were forming in her eyes, she turned her face away from him. She would never cry in front of that man. Never. Gold sighed, understanding the silence as a negative response.
Why he looked at her that way? With eyes showing anguish and regret, as if he really cared about her well-being.
They sat in silence for several minutes. Belle sat up in bed, resting her head on the pillow, looking toward the window at the other side of the room, not daring to look at Gold.
She felt her body relax again, and she almost fell asleep again when she was on alert to feel the fingertips of the man gently rubbing her wrist. Belle noticed that her skin was purplish in that region... But, she noted sadly that wasn't just there. Her whole body was marked with those horrible spots. Again she felt sick to remember who had done it to her, and closed her eyes tightly as she felt the softness of the touch of Adrian on her shattered skin.
"Who did this to you, Belle?" Gold asked in a whisper. Belle has not responded, turning her head to the opposite side, with her eyes still closed. She was startled by the way he asked that... With regret... But she wouldn't answer. She could not answer. "Please, Belle, tell me. Who did this to you?" He was pleading for an answer... Why?
Belle took a deep breath, looking at him. He was visibly trembling, consumed by pain.
"No matter... What was done cannot be undone," she replied in a dry tone, without showing any emotion.
Gold seemed to tremble even more with that answer. He stood up, walked to the chair beside the bed, and let himself collapse on it, covering his face with his hands.
"I promised. I promised I would protect you. I promised I would never let anything bad happen to you. I promised and yet I failed. See what that bastard did to you! And it's my fault!" He gasped, letting the words flowed from his mouth. "I wasn't able to fulfill the only promise I made you!"
Belle was silent. He had failed. It was his fault. Absolutely his fault. But a small part of her wanted to say that it was not. That part wish she could hug him and say that she forgave him. That part, however, was very small. Negligible. Nonexistent.
"I wish I could wash myself. I don't want to cause you more problems than I've already caused."
Gold looked agonizing, pain crossing his face.
"Sure... You... Can you stand up?" He asked apprehensively.
"Yes, I can."
"Well .. You will find some towels in that closet." He said, resuming his usual tone of voice, again hiding inside him that anguish he was feeling, and stood "The bathroom is in that door. I will ask for Mrs Potts some clean clothes, so that you can use." He spoke, and asking permission, he left the room; Belle listening to his steps along with the sound of the cane against the wooden floor distancing.
Belle went into the bathroom, closing the door behind her. She opened the taps of the bath, leaving water to almost overflowed the edges. She felt the hot water in her skin tingle pleasantly as she entered. She rubbed every part of her body until they were almost raw. Wanted to get rid of any traces that could have remained in her body that was part of the German. Forcefully, she rubbed her breasts, arms, legs and hair. If she could, she would pluck every inch of her skin that was within reach of the claws of Gaston.
The water had cooled off when she came out of the tub. In the corner of the bathroom, leaning against the wall, there was a mirror in which she could get a view of her entire body, from her feet to her head. Belle stopped in front of the object, looking at her reflection. The water still ran down her body as she watched sadly each spot that marked her body as a tattoo... Like a scar that would never heal.
Belle shuddered with the degradation of her body. Gold had asked who had done this to her... The truth was that it was he who had done this to her; since the first time she met him, her destiny was already laid out for her to suffer in the grip of those monsters.
She noticed that the woman's named Isabelle... The one she used to be, ceased to exist. Or at least she wanted that girl died inside her so she would not suffer even more. The Isabelle which was stared at her in the mirror was a woman completely unknown. Who was that woman? No doubt she had lost all her soul in that bed... Now she was just a puppet who would do whatever is asked, without any feeling for anyone... She didn't feel anything for Adrian Gold or for herself.
It was a coincidence that she had been brought in the house of Gold, and now that she was there, she had the perfect opportunity to scour every inch of that place and finally unravel the mystery and complete her mission...
However, she would really be able to kill him? Ah yes. This Isabelle was able to do anything, and kill Adrian Gold seemed something extremely simple... Very easy.
Who was that woman that insisted on looking at her through the mirror?
Belle left the bathroom and put on the clothes that had been left on the bed for her. A simple dress in a bluish ocher. She still felt weak and her body continued to ache; the interior of her private parts appeared to be raw.
She took advantage of that period of time that she was alone, to examine the inside of the room where she was. It was a simple room, probably only used to receive guests, but that did not make it be poorly maintained. There was a wardrobe with decorative carvings around its outline, but it was empty, and there was also a small dresser next to the window. Belle opened the drawer and found some papers inside. She took them to read, but there was no information that she was looking for, just the same leaflets about the Nazi regime that was being adopted in France.
Sighing, she kept in the drawer again, disappointed. Belle looked out the window and realized that the view she had was of the back of the house and the commencement of a dense forest landscape was the only she could see. Gold's house was on the outskirts of Paris. She also noted that the security at the back was poor and provided an easy access to anyone, including herself. It would be extremely simple sneak in the residence, if she couldn't find any documents before she return to the house of James.
A knock on the door warned her. "Come in" Belle said, recognizing the woman who had taken care of her.
The lady's face was marked by wrinkles, due to old age. The gray hairs were tied in a bun on top of her head, and she looked at Belle surreptitiously. "How are you feeling mademoiselle Chesneau?" The woman asked.
"I'm feeling a little better, ma'am...?"
"You can call me Mrs. Potts" she said. "I am relieved to hear that you are feeling better sweetie. When the young Jefferson brought you here, we thought you would die. I never saw Mr. Carruthers as troubled since the death of his wife..." Mrs. Potts looked worried. "We call him as fast as we could...".
"He was not here?"
Mrs. Potts did not respond immediately, examining her closely. "He had problems to solve..." finally spoke.
Tush, Belle knew exactly what problems were these; help the Germans, betray the United Kingdom, shoot James... The list was endless.
"Since you're feeling better, he asked me to take you to the library. He wished he could talk to the lady for a while."
"Sure," Belle said. She did not want to talk to Gold, but have the possibility to get out of that room and have access to the rest of the house only facilitate her research. She followed Mrs. Potts through the corridors of the house. They were on the second floor and it looked like the house was more extensive than Belle had imagined. The footers were all dark woods, and there were several tapestries adorning the walls. In another era, Belle could even get curious about those details, but here, at this point, she even looked at the objects around her. There were several doors, all closed, then nearing the end of the hall, were in one of the last doors, then Belle knocked and entered the library.
The place seemed empty, but she did not worry about it. She has completely lost her focus. The great room smelled of mold comfortably familiar. Belle studied the shelves, ranging from floor to ceiling. She had no idea how many books the library kept. She walked slowly down the sides of the room, walking in front of shelves that stretched up to four times her own height. Vigilant and stoic, felt as if they observe.
On the bookshelf in front, the books showed a wide variety of authors, from Charles Dickens, through Plato and including Guy de Maupassant.
"Did you find anything interesting here, Isabelle?"
Belle winced, realizing Gold joined her stealthily, pausing behind her, leaning against one of the bookshelves.
"Oh, I'm sorry" Belle tried to awaken those memories. She couldn't let the emotions affect her. "You have a wonderful collection of books here," said, looking admiringly at the shelves.
"I inherited my father's collection, but it is also my passion. I intend to expand the collection, if I can. The Nazis burned thousands and thousands of books across Europe, which makes this collection more valuable than it was a while ago..."
Belle ran her fingertips over the spines of the books' covers, absorbing the texture of those objects.
"Isabelle, please follow me..." Gold called her, waking her from her brief moment of peace. Again, she took her indifferent attitude. "Please sit down." He said, pointing to a chair opposite another leather chair that he occupied.
"Thanks," she said, sitting up.
"Well Miss Chesneau, I want you to know that I've informed James that you are here, lest he be worried. He and his wife were looking for you. He informed me that you had gone with Colonel Gaston last night and had not returned since then."
Belle nodded silently. Maybe she could go away soon, and so would have enough time to plan how would invade the house later.
Gold sighed deeply and stood up. Belle realized that he looked tired and distressed. But why? If he knew she was "Rose", he would never act that way. He would be ecstatic with her disgrace, and if he had the chance, he would make her suffer more.
"Isabelle... I know that I didn't comply with my promise" He spoke again, his voice sounding sorrow. "I cannot turn back the clock and prevent that..." Gold looked sadly at the marks that adorned the body of Belle and were visible. She folded her hands on her legs, entwining her fingers, avoiding looking at the man. "...That damned got his hands on you... But I can prevent him from doing it again. You must stay in this house. I've talked to James and he agreed."
Belle looked to Gold at that instant. She would have to stay in that place?
He was lying. He had not spoken to James. James and Mary Margaret should probably be thinking that Gaston had taken her to the Gestapo headquarters, where she could have been subjected to torture sessions and later be executed.
Ironically, she really had been captured, but not by Gaston, but by Adrian Gold.
"What?" She couldn't hold back the question that escaped her mouth. Gold would keep her in captive in that house?
"It is not safe that you keep walking freely in the streets of Paris while Gaston is also."
"But for how long must I stay here? Till the end of the war?" She asked sarcastically.
"Within a week, Gaston will travel to Germany. But until then, you should stay here. I've made all the necessary arrangements so that Gaston never disturb you again until he comes out of Paris."
"I appreciate that, but I know very well take care of myself alone, Mr. Carruthers," Belle said. She would never allow to be treated as a child, much less for that man in front of her.
"Don't doubt, Miss Chesneau, but look what happened to you," he retorted. Belle had to restrain herself not to speak everything that was stuck in her throat. 'It's your fault! What happened to me was your fault! You promised and you lied! '.
"How do you know that Gaston will travel to Germany?"
Gold smiled scornfully at her; that smile did not reach the lines of his eyes and was loaded with contempt. "This, dearie, is my problem." Speaking that, he turned his back on her, stopping only when he reached the door. "Enjoy your stay here" And saying that, he left the library, leaving her alone, surrounded by thousands of books that looked at her silently.
Some comments:
I would really like to thank you for all the comments I received due to the last chapter. Never thought it would have a repercussion so great.
Now, this chapter is more peaceful because I'll be starting to write a new phase in the life of Belle. And for this I needed to create a base. Now, I'm starting to approach the romance between her and Gold.
Prepare for thrills!
Please, share your thoughts! Review ;)