AN: Man, it's been a while. Maybe I can finally finish this little story of mine.
Today was Friday and the last school day before spring break.
Nothing out of the ordinary happened at school. Neither brother nor sister attempted anything. Once school was out, everyone was excited for their week-long break. And that afternoon, the sisters were all doing their own things while still wary of their brother.
Lori left with Leni to go shopping. Unfortunately, they discovered they were missing their wallets when they got to the mall. They had an idea of what or who the culprit was.
Luna was jamming to some tunes on her laptop while talking to Sam. The two were scheduling a date for Monday. They were going to this sweet concert downtown and it was going to be amazing.
Lucy and, more surprisingly, Lynn didn't bother anyone the entire day. The goth girl was quiet as usual, and Lynn hung out with friends the entire day doing basketball practice. She had plans for an upcoming tournament.
Lana and Lola were the only ones during that day that came up with any ideas for the war. Lana managed to sneak into Lincoln's room and let a bunch of snakes loose inside. To her disappointment, Lincoln handled them with no problem and didn't seem bothered by them. They weren't poisonous and didn't bite, but snakes were still creepy to most people.
On the other hand, Lola initially didn't have anything in mind. But when she got home from school that day, she found one of her tiaras on their bedroom floor smashed. In anger, she declared that she would find any dirt on Lincoln and blackmail him until the end of time and space.
Lisa and Luan, however, were nowhere to be found.
They had a sister meeting that afternoon, and the girls were curious about where they had gone. They had some idea of what Lisa was up to. She had been working on a project for quite a while now, and they doubted that she scrapped it. She must've been working on it now, even if she wasn't in the garage. Luan was a different story. The girls were worried when no one, not even her roommate, said they spoke with her that day. She was completely MIA. The elementary school students saw Lisa at school, but the high schoolers couldn't say the same thing about Luan. They all suspected that she was developing a plan for their brother.
Little did everyone know, Luan felt like her mind was splitting apart.
Going out with Benny didn't fix it. Doing comedy at the local arcade didn't either. Her mind would often drift to the war, namely Lincoln.
She, the Queen of Pranks, was losing against their only brother. She took pride in her pranks and April Fool's jokes and was losing to a sibling with no practice over a decade in the making.
This was a part of her, something that she would sacrifice her entire life for, and she was losing to him.
No matter what she tried, nothing seemed to work on him. He was inside her head, knowing what she would say or do. No, she laughed. She was going easy on him. Yeah, that was it. She, the great older sister she was, was taking it easy on him like he would if they rarely played video games together. Looks like she knew the problem. Now she needed to fix this and show Lincoln what she could do.
"A performance?" Lori asked.
Luan nodded as everyone in the family sat in the living room, minus Lincoln. She had them called for a special announcement that late Friday afternoon. The sisters were glad to see her after worrying all day.
Luan nodded with a smile. "Yup! And I would love everyone to come and attend!"
"We'd love to Luan," Rita said with a smile. "Your father and I should be free on Monday too."
Luan then focused on their parents and said, "Can you tell Lincoln for me? I still have a lot of preparations to do."
"Of course! When I see him." Lynn said, "I think he's working on his homework with his friends."
All her sisters gave Luan a knowing look, but they turned nervous when the comedian's face went insane.
"Excellent."
Just then, her roommate raised her hand.
Luan scowled, which caught some of them off guard. "Yes?"
Luna looked a little sheepish. "I got a date with Sam that night, so I can't come."
"Fine," Luan said with a scoff and roll of her eyes.
Their parents concluded they had another fight and left it at that, but the girls looked on in worry.
The Loud sisters tried and failed to get Lincoln for the next few days. Their brother seemed to predict every one of their moves, which felt impossible.
On Saturday, the first day free of school during the break, Lori realized too late that her sandwich during lunch had too much hot sauce. It burned her tongue and ruined her meal. It didn't help her bowel movements either.
The two fashion girls of the sisters, Leni and Lola, ended up covered in green goo at different parts of the day. Usually, this goo would be Luan's doing, but they knew better.
Other than those three, nothing really happened.
The war was taking a significant toll on the girls. They were getting tired, more anxious, and their emotions were exploding.
Lana, Lucy, Luna, Leni, and Lori were all getting more exhausted as time passed. Their determination to win was dwindling, and they didn't know how much longer they could take dishing out attacks uselessly.
Lisa, Luan, Lola, and Lynn still swore to the skies that they would win no matter what. While it was believed that Lola and Lynn were silently screaming, Lisa and Luan seemed to have something up their sleeves.
The days went by quietly with no attacks from the girls. Lincoln managed to get a few of them, namely, getting some sticky substance in Lola's hair and eating more of Lynn's food. Their parents notified the boy of Luan's upcoming show, but he didn't tell them he already knew.
As Monday was close, the rest of the sisters were starting to get worried about Luan. The girl was starting to seem unhinged. She stopped talking to all of them, even her own roommate. She'd burst out laughing randomly, and her eyes twitched momentarily. They couldn't even get a conversation going with her. It looked as if she didn't even notice they even existed.
The girls had a sister meeting with all nine of them that Sunday afternoon. Lori had an idea she couldn't believe she didn't think about earlier.
Slamming her heel like a gavel, she spoke out to the others.
"Alright, girls. I know this war is getting to everyone—"
Lynn cleared her throat, and both Lisa and Lola frowned. Luan didn't say anything but held the same opinion on the statement.
"—mostly everyone, but I just came up with something that could help us." She pulled out her phone and started typing. "We all know how Lincoln's best friend, Clyde, has a huge crush on me."
A series of confirmations came from her sisters.
"Well, I was thinking to call and negotiate with him," she continued, "If we can get an inside man, things could get much easier for us."
"I don't understand!" Lola shouted in irritation. "How is Lincoln one-upping us?!"
Lisa pushed up her glasses. "I have no idea, quite honestly."
Lori nodded. "It beats me. But clearly, we need something to use against him. Clyde's the perfect chance we got."
Lynn's pride took a hit at that. She never thought she would need outside help to win against her brother. Lola felt the same way, but Lisa had faith in her upcoming plans. Luan sat there too, but she wasn't listening to any conversations. Her mind was racing, and the car couldn't keep itself on the road.
"If no one has any objections, I'll get to calling then." Lori started to punch in Clyde's house number. She had it in case of any emergency.
Meanwhile, near the edge of town, Lincoln stood at a bus stop with Mabel. The two were conversing pleasantly while waiting for a certain bus.
Ever since that date, the two had become very close. While they weren't an official couple as of yet, they still considered each other very close friends. For Lincoln, he wasn't entirely sure if he wanted a romantic relationship with Mabel, but he wouldn't say no if she asked him. She was a lovely girl, and he immensely enjoyed her company. It wouldn't hurt to try being partners with her, but he didn't want to make things awkward by asking her out. The boy was content with being simple friends.
The bus they were waiting for pulled up after ten minutes of waiting. The doors of the large vehicle folded open, and people poured out.
Eyeing the small crowd, Lincoln didn't see who he was looking for. Then, suddenly, someone punched his arm.
"Hey, lame-o!" Ronnie shouted with a smirk. "There's another exit at the back, you know."
Lincoln turned to her, returning the smirk and lightly punching her in the shoulder. "Hey, loser. About time you showed up."
Mabel smiled at the interaction.
Behind Ronnie, her older brother was pulling a couple of suitcases. It looked heavy as he strained himself, trying to pull them out of the bus. "A little help here, sis?"
"Oh! Sorry!" Ronnie widened her eyes as she rushed to him, Lincoln and Mabel following.
She helped him get the suitcases on the sidewalk, and once it was done, the bus driver took off with a nod.
Bobby wiped his forehead of the sweat and looked down at Lincoln. "Hey, little bro!"
The two did a fist bump. Afterwards, Lincoln stepped to the side and introduced the girl standing behind him.
"Guys, this is Mabel, my newest friend. Mabel, this is Ronnie Anne and Bobby, one of my best friends and her cool brother that used to live here."
"Hi." Mabel waved at them.
"Nice to meet you," Ronnie said, returning the wave.
Lincoln told Mabel earlier during the day that these two were coming to visit over spring break. His other friends would have come to see them arrive too, but they were all busy with their stuff.
The thing was, Ronnie managed to tell Lincoln they were coming over before Bobby told Lori, so the Loud asked her to convince Bobby not to tell his oldest sister. The teenage lover was easy to persuade, wanting to surprise his girlfriend.
"Where are you guys staying?" Lincoln asked.
"Oh, there's a nice hotel not far from where you live," Bobby replied. "And since Royal Woods isn't the most popular tourist attraction around, it's pretty cheap."
"Sweet!" Lincoln smiled. "Once you're settled in, I have a bunch of things planned."
"I'm so excited!" Ronnie shouted. "I haven't been here in ages! I can't wait to see some old friends."
Lincoln and Mabel accompanied the two siblings to find where they were staying. After taking another bus for about half an hour, they came across a fantastic hotel that was cheap, as Bobby said. During the trip, Mabel got to know the two a little more, and Lincoln was happy they were getting along.
In the middle of unpacking, they ordered some food. By the time the two Santiagos were finished, their order arrived at the front door hot and ready.
"I can't wait to see my babe," Bobby gushed as he bit into his burger.
Then, a spark of an idea came into Lincoln's mind. "I know! Tomorrow Luan's having a comedy show, and Lori will watch it. You can surprise her there."
"Really? Nice! You have the address bro?"
Lincoln nodded. "I'll send it to Ronnie Anne."
Lincoln noticed Ronnie Anne looking silently at him; the boy knew what was on her mind. She was curious about the war between him and his sisters. A conversation would probably take place later when no one else was around.
It got late when they ate, unwinded, and talked a little, so Lincoln walked Mabel home. After that, he had nothing else planned for the day, so he walked home, sneaking inside the house through his window. Nothing concerning the war happened that day.
Every Loud went to bed when night came. Luna struggled to sleep initially because excitement flowed through her veins due to tomorrow's date. After an hour of tossing, she managed to fall asleep with her headphones on while it played loud music. She couldn't hear her roommate quietly giggling to herself in the wake of night.
It was now Monday, the day of Luan's show. The family stayed home peacefully until lunchtime when they quickly ate and took off in Vanzilla, where it was being held.
"Ah! I practiced all day today!" Lynn said as she relaxed in the van. "My muscles are sore."
Lucy gave her a pat on the shoulder.
The ride wasn't too far from their home, and soon a giant red circus tent appeared. It sat on a plain of grass in a park and towered over the far-off trees and buildings. The sisters and parents looked up at the thing in awe while Lincoln hid a smirk.
A bunch of cars were parked at the front of the tent. At the large entrance, people were walking in, looking excited.
As the Louds parked at a reserved spot in front of the circus tent, Lori looked out the window, and her expression turned into complete joy as she shoved Leni's head out of the way.
Not far from them were two familiar Latinas walking towards the tent. The teenage girl opened the door to Vanzilla, crawling over and eliciting shouts from her sisters.
Before she could jump out of the van, her spine shivered as a hand grabbed the back of her shirt.
"Stay," Luan said coldly. "You'll see him after the show."
Lori looked at her sister with sweat forming on her forehead. The comedian was staring at her with a neutral look, but there was something odd about it. With a gulp, the oldest sister nodded.
The exchange went unnoticed by the parents, who sat at the front of the vehicle, but not the siblings.
"Alright, gang," Lynn Sr. said, "time to show our full support!"
Luan stepped out of the car and looked at the crowd of her sisters and Lincoln once they did the same. The only one who wasn't with them was Luna, who was on her date with Sam. She spotted Lily, who was getting lifted out by their brother, and a thought crossed her mind.
Turning to everyone, she said, "Alright, guys, this way." She walked off, the rest of the Louds following.
Instead of entering through the front like the other people, she led them around the tent and through a small entranceway hidden from the public. The girls, realizing what she was up to, crowded behind Lincoln so he couldn't run off. The boy just nonchalantly continued forward without a care in the world.
The sisters entered after their brother, and right before the parents followed, Luan grabbed them by their shirts and pulled them away. The siblings didn't notice.
None of the siblings spoke as they walked through a small corridor. They noticed a light at the end of it and assumed it was the lights for the show.
Once they finally entered the tent, the sisters all gasped in awe.
In the middle of the tent was a large arena. There were a bunch of obstacles, platforms, trampolines, and ball pits scattered around. At the sides of the tent were the stands in a circular shape. It wrapped around the entire circumference, filled with people who chatted amongst themselves.
The sisters could recognize a bunch of faces. There were people from their schools, including all their close and family friends. There was even that brother-sister duo that Lori caught first.
"Bobby boo-boo-bear!" she shouted, waving a hand high. "What are you doing here?!"
Bobby stopped chatting with Ronnie Anne momentarily, and he waved back lovingly at her.
Lincoln, meanwhile, shared a glance with Ronnie, and smiled up at her. The boy also noticed Mabel, her friends, his friend group, and others from their school. Flip was also there, lugging around a cart with treats to sell.
Lisa furrowed her brows. Why weren't they up there in the stands to watch? No, the proper question was; Why were they down here? She also took her eyes to the stands before coming across their parents sitting among the observers. The two of them were looking down at them in confusion.
A conclusion crossed her mind. Looking at her sisters and Lincoln, she saw they were all in stunned silence. More oddly, Luan was nowhere to be seen. She swiftly approached Lori, tugging on her clothes to gain her attention.
"She has Lincoln right where she wants him!" Lisa shouted in a whisper. "Let's go!"
The other sisters also heard and smiled before the doors behind them slammed shut.
Their hearts skipped a beat as they all realized the same thing. They were caught in Luan's trap meant for their brother. The brother in question didn't look disturbed as he looked on through the arena filled with cool-looking objects.
Suddenly, the entire audience went quiet once everyone heard laughter throughout the room. Confused faces spread like wildfire before the entire tent went dark.
A second later, a spotlight appeared in the middle where the highest blue cylinder platform was. Standing on top of it was Luan, wearing an unhinged look on her face. Her eyes only focused on one thing, and their sisters knew who it was.
Looking at Lincoln, they gasped when they saw him wearing his bomber jacket, staring straight back at her. It was as if only the two of them were in the giant room, and nothing else mattered.
"Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls!" Luan shouted, her voice echoing. "Welcome to my grand show, The Great Conceding!"
An applause erupted from the stands, and her smile turned into a smirk.
"So sit back, relax, and enjoy the show!" She had a crazed look as her attention focused on Lincoln, the boy returning the look with a cheeky grin.
"For my first act," the sisters immediately noticed that Luan was no longer speaking to the crowd. No, instead, her words were directly at Lincoln. On the platform she stood on, a turret-like machine rose up and whirled to life. "We'll see if you can handle some sweet sugar!"
With that insane grin, she aimed the machine at Lincoln by the grips and fired.
The sisters watched as a blue cupcake was shot out of it, heading straight for them.
Lori, thinking quickly, took Lily from Lincoln and sprinted off, yelling, "Luan! What do you think you're doing?!"
Lincoln smiled and dodged the cupcake before taking off in a different direction.
"What a sugar rush! Get it?!" Luan laughed as she pressed a button on a remote, and a few more cannons surrounding the arena went off, shooting cakes, pies, and cupcakes to the air, making them fall on Lincoln and the girls.
"Get to cover!" Lynn yelled, running to get behind a platform.
Lori held Lily as she ducked behind a square platform that was a little taller than her. A few seconds later, Lisa appeared next to her.
As Lincoln ran and dodged the incoming sweets, some other sisters sprinted beside him. They were too occupied with getting away to realize what his next move was.
As a cherry pie was about to make impact, Lincoln picked Lola up off the ground, getting a cry out of her. He used her as a shield, and she shrieked as her face was splattered by pastry.
This didn't affect Luan, who only continued to laugh as she fired her cupcakes from the cannon on her platform.
Lori and Lisa both noticed this and looked at her in shock.
Lincoln dropped a groaning Lola to the ground and slid to get behind a rectangular shape. A few seconds later, Lynn appeared behind a circle next to him.
"You can't hide forever!" Luan said with a cackle.
Lincoln looked up and saw chocolate cake falling toward him.
Lucy, taking the opportunity, snuck behind him and held him still. "Sorry, Lincoln, but the sooner this is over, the better."
Lincoln smiled. "I'm thinking the opposite."
Using the strength of being older and a boy, he took leverage against Lucy and tried to pin her in front of him.
Lynn took notice and sprinted over, doing a front flip to dodge a pie. She grabbed Lincoln's arms to try and stop him.
He reacted fast, using his feet to trip Lynn and make her let go of him.
"Muscles… too sore!" Lynn groaned on the floor.
Then, he managed to flip Lucy in front of him, and her face was covered in dessert seconds later.
Luan laughed as Lincoln took off again. "It's bad having a sweet tooth! Get it?!"
"Has Luan gone nuts?!" Lori yelled as Lisa watched in horror.
The brainiac shouted, "She completely disregarded Lucy. Doesn't she know the meaning of friendly fire?"
As Lincoln ran, his adrenaline surged. To his right, he saw that Leni was quite unlucky. She was kneeling on the ground, holding her ankle in pain while there was some icing on her shoulder and thigh. His face softened briefly before he frowned and turned heel to head for one of the trampolines.
He used it to jump up to a higher platform. Meanwhile, Luan kept her aim locked on him, trying to get a hit any chance she could get.
Lincoln ran across the high square platform, evading multiple cupcakes, before coming across a cylinder bridge, which he had to go slower on to keep his balance. Luckily for him, Luan seemed too out of it to hit her shot when he slowed for a couple of seconds. As he turned the corner on an orange colored L, another trampoline led him to the next level.
Lori turned to Lisa and said, "Watch Lily," before she took off to a trampoline near them.
Lincoln jumped up to the next level of height as Luan missed a few more shots. He noticed a path among the shapes that would lead him to a trampoline directly underneath Luan.
The comedian laughed as she fired more cupcakes at him, her sights only on her sole brother.
He slid under a pink cupcake before hopping over a green one, not halting. Then, a pie came raining down from above and he had to leap forward to dodge it. He noticed someone standing at the top as he jumped across a rectangle to a triangle ramp.
He paused, looking up at Lana as a cupcake passed behind him. He noticed the orange cupcake in her hand.
Lana, knowing how unpredictable some animals were, expected many things. One of the scenarios she predicted came true as Lincoln barrelled straight for her.
Ducking under a cupcake that Luan shot, it barely missed his head, and he locked his eyes on Lana.
The mechanic readied her cupcake before she threw it, and Lincoln managed to tilt to the side to evade it.
As Lisa looked up at them, she noticed something when she stared at Lana and went wide-eyed.
Lana anticipated Lincoln dodging her throw, and now the boy would surely think he was safe to keep going forward.
As she took out a muffin hidden behind her back, Lincoln looked stunned momentarily as he neared her.
Time seemed to slow down as Lincoln tried to stop his sprint. Twisting her hips, Lana gripped the muffin and was seconds away from throwing it at him. She knew that her brother knew how powerful her throw was. It was on par with Lynn's, which wasn't a joke.
But then suddenly, something sticky hit the side of her face, which knocked her off the platform, and she fell into a ball pit. When she landed, a bunch of cream splattered from inside.
Everyone looked up in shock at Luan, her cannon smoking at the tip, who glared daggers at her little sister. "Back off!" she yelled. "He's. Mine!"
Lincoln looked at Lana in stunned silence before her groan from below snapped him out of it. He continued up the ramp and came across another cylinder bridge. At the other end of it was the trampoline he saw from below.
Luan aimed her cannon at Lincoln once more and fired a triplet of cupcakes. Her brother shocked her by diving between them and over the bridge, preventing any of it from slowing him down.
Lisa noticed something in him while watching. When Lana was hit by Luan's cupcake, it was like a switch flipped inside of their brother. He looked faster, more determined, and more calculating.
Lincoln jumped on the trampoline and sprang upwards. When he landed, he was on the same platform as Luan and her cannon.
She turned her weapon at him with a growl and fired rapidly.
Lincoln ran around the cannon as Luan tried to track him, but she couldn't seem to swivel it fast enough.
Soon, the cupcakes stopped flying out, and Luan kept pressing the trigger, which only elicited a click. "Dang it!" she yelled angrily before her expression turned into a crazed smile. "I guess I just had a sugar crash!" Her laughs that followed dripped with insanity.
Suddenly, she stomped on the ground, pressing a button on the floor.
A small blue container quickly rose from the ground, she opened it, and a cold mist escaped. Reaching inside, she pulled out a frozen loaf of ficelle bread. She aimed it at Lincoln like it was a sword.
Lincoln took a wary step back.
Luan laughed. "Surrender! Actually, no, wait, just do me a favor and fall into a ball pit so I don't need to push you into one."
Instead of answering her, Lincoln rolled under the bread and took out one from inside.
Shocked for a second, Luan's face turned into anger as she slashed downwards.
Lincoln held his bread sword sideways to block.
The audience watched in wonder and amazement as the two clashed bakery products.
Luan glowered at Lincoln before her expression turned to glee like a switch. Her brother stared back at her, his own expression as a smirk.
Rita looked at the two children with raised brows and a slack jaw while her husband audibly gulped and started to chew his fingernails.
Luan's smile turned back into a frown as Lincoln blocked three more of her swipes. She couldn't figure out if she wanted to be mad or happy. "Oh, that's just like you! Always wanting to be so difficult! You're annoying like some pest. Why can't you just admit defeat!?"
Lincoln didn't reply to any of that. Instead, he just stared into her eyes.
It was tense in the air as everyone went quiet. Lincoln held his bread up to anticipate his sister, and she scowled at him with her arms slacked to her sides.
A couple silent seconds passed before Luan suddenly gave a battle cry as she struck forward with her bread. Lincoln brought his loaf to counter, and they clashed.
Lisa watched in horror as Luan relentlessly tried to get a hit in, but she figured out something quickly. "Luan, calm down! Your actions are predictable!"
Standing beside Lisa, Lily looked at her brother with sparkling eyes.
Luan didn't seem to hear her nerdy sister. If she did, it wasn't in her interest to respond. She continuously attacked, Lincoln stepping back as he blocked her strikes.
The boy didn't want to walk up to face her wrath. He knew that over time she would let up due to her stamina. Lisa was right. She was way too angry and wasn't thinking straight. She was too dangerous to take head-on, but he could tell her every move, and there may be a moment when she made a mistake.
Lincoln was pushed by her strikes around the platform they stood on. He made some distance between them, running behind the cupcake cannon. He tried to keep it between them as Luan glared at him. When she went clockwise to try and get to him, he did the same to stay away, and she tried to fake him out by going in one direction before suddenly turning the other. He managed to keep the space between them from getting shorter.
Eventually, Luan grew frustrated and growled, jumping on her cannon and hopping off of it, diving down at her brother. Lincoln, who saw an opening, stepped to the side as Luan couldn't change directions in the air and then pushed her back by bracing his bread on her side.
Luan cried as she stumbled near the edge. She barely managed to keep herself from falling into the ball pit filled with cream below. However, as she turned to Lincoln, who was sprinting towards her, she found out that her brother wasn't finished anytime soon.
When he got up to her, he used his bread to try and push her off the edge. Luan brought hers up to try and push back, but Lincoln had the edge due to her awkward stance on the platform.
She was seconds away from being pushed off before a second piece of bread entered the fray and pushed Lincoln back to the center.
"That's enough!" Lori yelled, standing between them.
But what she didn't expect was Luan to get mad at her.
"Lori!" she shouted.
Lori glared at her. "We're on the same side!"
"Just stay out of this!"
"You dragged us into this!"
Lincoln, taking the opportunity, dashed over to the container with frozen bread. He looked inside, and sure enough, there was one last stick. He grabbed it and turned to his sisters, dual wielding them in both hands.
In the stands, his friends put on feared looks. Clyde was even shaking. Whenever the boys would play sword fighting, they were all pretty even. All of them except Lincoln, who could easily best two of them at the same time. One day, Lincoln had the bright idea to use two plastic swords, and by the end of the day, they were forced to ban him from doing so. No one could even compare to him.
Lincoln smirked at his two sisters. "As much as I'd love to watch you girls tear each other apart, how about we get the real show underway?"
Luan turned to him with a glare and growled. She sprinted towards him with a yell.
Lori followed close behind, also slightly irritated by Lincoln's cocky nature.
Together, the two slashed at their brother while he took steps back. Luan's attacks were quick, while Lori's were focused. Even so, Lincoln was able to parry all of them consistently.
The boy backpedaled off the central platform and down a ramp, continuing to block their strikes.
Lynn was shocked as she watched her brother easily handle both of her older sisters above. Even with a numbers disadvantage, the calm boy seemed confident in his abilities. Still, it was only a matter of time until they overwhelmed him. All he could do was retreat slowly while blocking.
After the small ramp downward, the fight was brought across a narrow rectangle bridge. Lincoln kept resisting their barrage as he took a quick look behind him. The platform they were on was about to end. Below, there was a trampoline waiting for someone to drop on.
The two sisters swung at him at the same time, and he blocked them by crossing his bread with each other. Then, he used all of his strength to push them back momentarily.
Hopping backward, he jumped off the platform and onto a trampoline. Using the momentum from the high jump, he bounced onto a different platform of the same height not too far away.
Lori looked on in shock as Luan clenched her fist in anger. The older sister knew that the comedian was going to follow their brother but didn't think it was a good idea. "Luan, wait!"
Luan didn't listen. She jumped down to the trampoline and bounced to the other platform too. Unfortunately for her, this was just what Lincoln was waiting for. As she dropped onto the platform, she couldn't change her direction while Lincoln smirked.
She looked shocked as her brother intercepted her fall, pushing her mid-air. She was pushed back onto the trampoline and bounced high in the air uncontrollably.
Lori gritted her teeth and took the trampoline for a ride as well. She jumped to the platform Lincoln was standing on and managed to land before he could push her. Once she had her footing, she charged forward with her breadstick.
Lincoln smirked as she tried to get a hit in. While in a duo with Luan, they couldn't get anything to land, so he wondered what made her think she could do it alone.
Lori's attacks were knocked away by one of Lincoln's bread-swords. She went wide-eyed once he went on the offensive, trying to land a hit on her instead. Her brother was relentless like Luan, but his attacks were focused like hers. On top of all of that, he was skilled at wielding a long weapon. He swung the bread effortlessly like he had done this for years, much to her shock. Because he had two of them it was tough to defend against.
Lincoln's friends in the stands looked on. They weren't surprised. Their sisters might not have known, but Lincoln was a good sword fighter due to his practice with them. Clyde's focus was on Lori as he felt pity for her. The older girl mostly backstepped to avoid the incoming attacks, but the few she chose to block were met with shock. Lincoln's swings were powerful and honed.
As Lori stepped back from another swing, she looked around frantically for an escape route. She didn't have such high pride as Lynn not to admit she was outmatched.
Noticing a trampoline not far from where she stood, she blocked a couple more strikes from Lincoln before sprinting toward it.
Lincoln laughed before chasing after her.
As the two of them jumped down to a trampoline and landed on another platform, Luan was looking from below. She glared at her sister, but it hardened when her brother appeared in her vision.
Lori didn't have time to try Lincoln's trick and push him off mid-air on the new circle platform. The boy was right behind her, nearly arriving on the platform simultaneously. She sidestepped a couple of his attacks and repositioned herself on the other side of the platform.
Lincoln aimed his bread sword, slowly stalking towards her. His oldest sister mirrored his steps in the opposite direction.
He quickly swung forward, and Lori barely managed to block it with her own bread. But to catch her off guard, he followed up instantly with his other piece of ficelle. She still found a way to block it but didn't get her bread sword in position on time, and her entire arm flailed as it awkwardly defended her.
Lori was on the complete defensive now. They traded blows as she walked backward off the circle platform and onto another narrow rectangle bridge.
From below, Lisa gritted her teeth. "She's outmatched. Did our male sibling take fencing lessons? No, I've seen my fair share and this looks nothing of the sort."
Lincoln managed to push Lori's position to the edge of the bridge. The eldest Loud looked down and saw that it wasn't a trampoline. Instead, it was another cream ball pit.
Lincoln chuckled. "Nowhere else to run."
There was no chance to say anything as Lincoln did a double uppercut with both of his bread swords. She managed to bring hers up to block it, but it proved useless as it was knocked out of her hands and onto the ground below the platform. Looking at her fallen weapon and then back at Lincoln, she noticed Luan, who finally managed to get back up at this level.
Lincoln turned to her comedic sister, and she stared back. He gave her a grin and, without looking back at Lori, spun his bread swords in his hands before jabbing them behind, knocking their older sister off the platform.
Lori screamed as she fell into the ball pit covered in cream.
From below, Lynn peeked out of cover and spotted Lori's bread sword.
Luan didn't seem to care when Lori fell. Instead, she yelled with rage and sprinted toward her brother.
Lisa cringed from below as she watched Luan. "She's too angry to beat him."
Lincoln efficiently parried two incoming swings before knocking her bread sword out of her grip. His sister took a few steps back in shock.
"I win," he said.
"Not yet!" someone yelled.
Lincoln looked up to see none other than Lynn, who was swinging over to them on a rope. She landed between him and Luan with a bread sword in hand. He glanced at where Lori's fell and put the pieces together.
Lynn took a step forward but then felt her sore muscles and wobbled.
Lincoln smiled.
"You must be so tired after all that basketball today, Lynn. I don't think you've realized it yet, but after years of forcing me to play with you, my stamina is just as good. Also, it's required when you live in such a chaotic family, don't you think?"
"Yeah—" Lynn rubbed her legs and strained. "—I can still keep your attention though, huh Stinkin'?"
Suddenly, two arms with stripped sleeves wrapped around his torso. Lincoln whipped his head around to see Lucy holding him still.
Lynn ignored her sore muscles momentarily and used this chance to rush forward.
The boy widened his eyes when he saw Lynn getting close. Thinking quickly, he used all his strength, turning both him and Lucy around. Lynn was moments of slashing forward with her bread but in the middle of her sprint she put on a shocked look at the sight of Lucy being in front.
Lincoln then pushed an astonished Lucy into Lynn, knocking them both back. He needed some distance, so he sprinted past them and jumped down to a low platform, then again to ground level.
Luan ran to Lynn and Lucy, but instead of interacting with her siblings, she ran past them.
"Hey!" Lynn shouted as Lucy dusted her clothes.
Luan continued without replying, chasing after their brother.
Lincoln took a breather as he looked over to Lily, standing behind some cover with Lisa beside her.
He stepped forward, but then he was tackled to the ground by two large arms, his loaf of bread dropping to the floor.
"Gotchu!" Leni said with a triumphant smile.
Lincoln thought she probably intended her smile to be intimidating, but he thought it was adorable. He chuckled as well.
He was trapped underneath her but knew a trick to get him out. Using his finger, he tickled her at the side of her waist.
"Hey!" She laughed uncontrollably. "That's my funny bone!"
He managed to tickle her enough to escape. When she tried to reach over and grab him again, he skipped a few steps back to get away.
*SLAP*
Lincoln's head turned as everyone in the room gasped. His cheek stung, and putting a hand up, he rubbed the reddening skin.
Luan couldn't help but laugh, hugging her sides. "Finally!" she yelled, looking at him with wide and insane eyes. "I. Got. You!" She raised both hands in the air, crying out, "Me! No one can top the Queen of Pranks! What do you have to say about that!?"
She stared at her brother, who looked back at her with a large smirk. Her smile disappeared as she took him in.
Lincoln brought his hands up and clapped in a slow rhythm. "I finally got caught in one of your pranks, Luan. Congratulations." He stopped clapping, gesturing around the arena to the other sisters. "Was it worth it?"
Luan looked to where her brother gestured. Lola was sitting off to the side, trying to get some cherry pie out of her hair. Having pulled herself out of the ball pit, the other twin sat against one of the platforms frowning at her. Lori was currently getting out of the ball pit she fell into. Lynn and Lucy were still at the top of one of the platforms, the goth girl having some chocolate cake on her clothes. Leni held her ankle as she stood up, bouncing on one leg. The only ones who seemed to come out of all this unscathed were Lisa and Lily.
"I guess it was worth it after going friendly fire on all of our sisters. You managed to get me, right?" He chuckled again. "But look at that. The first hit you got me with was with your bare hands. That's so unlike you, Luan."
Luan's eyes were kept on her sisters as Lincoln's question repeated in her head. Was it worth it? Looking at the damage she caused, it was apparent that she had gone too far. Her brother had a point. She did all of this and only got a scummy slap. This was supposed to be a non-violent war, and she went against that.
Lincoln looked at Luan unamusedly as she dropped to the ground on her knees. It seemed she learned her lesson.
"You sure showed everyone how nine sisters treat their only brother." He scoffed and walked past her.
Picking up one of his bread-swords, he went to where the two youngest Louds stood. He stopped when he was about to pass Lisa. The toddler went as still as a rock, afraid to look up at him. Instead, her eyes went downcast. He could tell she realized there was nothing she could do to him.
With all the sisters out of commission, no one stopped Lincoln as he went to Lily and scooped her into his arms.
Even the crowd was utterly silent, all shocked by the events they witnessed.
Before Lincoln left, he made one final statement to the audience, his voice echoing throughout the room. "Thanks for coming, everyone!" he shouted. "I hope you enjoyed your dose of the Loud siblings! I would like to announce to everyone, especially my sisters, that no matter what happens in our Psychological War, I will never surrender. If it takes days, weeks, months, or even years to win, that's what I'll accomplish. Because you all thought it would be so easy in a nine versus one, didn't you? Well, maybe you should rethink that before this drags on too long. I'm not complaining. I'm having a blast, personally. But I can tell that slowly, day by day, it's wearing you all down. And you can't keep this up forever."
Everyone, including his sisters, heard him, and no one interrupted his speech.
Turning, Lincoln walked out of the arena, not without giving a look to his parents that said, "I'll explain later."
His sisters watched his departure, and no one made a move to stop him as he exited through the front.
Minutes later, his parents appeared outside. They spotted Lincoln holding Lily beside Vanzilla and went up to him.
His father spoke cautiously, his voice sounding nervous. "Hey, sport. Your sisters are going to help Luan clean up, so we can take a cab back home. I gave Lori the van keys."
Lincoln nodded and said nothing else.
In the middle of their car ride home, it started to rain. Lincoln even heard thunder in the background.
The driver was paid once they reached back, and the four Louds entered their home.
"Alright," Lincoln said as he stood in the living room before his parents. The two adults sat on the couch with Rita holding Lily. "I guess I'll start from the beginning."
He did just that, telling his parents the story of ever since he ruined their talent show, the war that was under their noses. He told them of some of the attacks they used and admitted he was the one who trapped the girls at bingo.
"Sorry for getting you in the crossfire, Mom," Lincoln said sheepishly. "But anyway, you both saw how it ended with Luan out there. She might be holding off on pranking for a while. It's about time she realized how she overdoes it sometimes. But other than today, the war has been completely harmless."
"I can't believe this has been happening for so long, and we didn't notice." Lynn Sr. said.
"Well, that's a part of it, right?" Lincoln replied. "If one of us were to get grounded, it would be considered a hit."
Rita raised her brows in concern. "And all your sisters have been teaming up on you, Lincoln?"
"Well—" he walked up and tickled Lily's nose. "—not all of them."
He looked at his two parents with a serious look. "I know you don't want to. But I'd suggest staying out of this."
"Lincoln, we can't let this keep happening." Rita shook her head. "What if it gets out of control again? I trust your judgment, but it could tear this family apart."
"That won't happen," Lincoln said. "They won't let it, and neither will I. But I swore to myself I wouldn't surrender."
Lynn furrowed his brows. "But if we ground all of you-"
"I'm sorry," Lincoln cut in. "But that won't stop me either. Unless you want to ground and keep your eyes on me forever, I won't stop until they surrender."
"Why?" They both asked at the same time.
"You try living in a house where all your sisters overshadow you!" Lincoln yelled back angrily, making them shocked. "Finally, I have a chance to prove to myself that I'm not the worthless part of this family!"
Rita stared at him with gentle eyes. "Lincoln…"
"No one realized how awful I felt when I found out they didn't want me to help in the talent show. This war is on the cusp of being over, and I am NOT going to surrender when I'm so close!"
Just then, the front door slammed open. A silhouette of a rockstar stood under the dark rain outside, wet head to toe, and a guitar in hand.
The parents looked fearfully at her while Lincoln slowly turned.
Lightning struck, and everyone saw the wet makeup drooling down her face briefly. Was it due to the rain? Or was there something else just as watery?
Lincoln looked over to the parents, who took their worrying gaze off the livid Luna to stare back. He gave them a promising expression, and they quickly took Lily and went upstairs.
Luna walked in, her boots squeaking and wetting the floor.
Lincoln smiled at her. "How was the date?"
Luna stared back at him with angry, sad eyes, her hair dripping with rain water. She noticed he was wearing a bomber jacket.
Lincoln spoke first. "Sam owed me a favor, so I told her to bail on your date. I was shocked she even considered it, but I managed to convince her. She likes her girlfriend's cute little brother."
Luna gritted her teeth. "So it was you?" she said as if it confirmed her suspicions.
"Yeah," Lincoln replied. "The number of times you all interfered with my love life? Surely one of your plans being ruined isn't all that bad."
Luna gripped the head of her guitar tighter. Which didn't go unnoticed by Lincoln.
The boy chuckled. "I wonder what she'll say when she finds out you're all teaming up on your younger brother. She might even be disappointed."
Luna widened her eyes in anger. Holding her instrument, she was moments away from playing it to ring Lincoln's ears.
But then her brother aimed something at her, a long loaf of bread.
"You've missed a lot at Luan's show. Maybe you can avenge your roommate instead of yourself."
Luna turned shocked. "What did you do?" she asked.
Lincoln shrugged. "They'll let you know eventually, but right now, they're cleaning her mess."
Lori looked at her siblings and sighed, looking around at the dessert-coated floor. "We can wait until later to clean this up, I guess. If that's fine, Luan?"
The comedian nodded, picking herself up. It was the first time the mentally defeated girl had moved since Lincoln left.
They all sat on one of the cushioned platforms. It was comfortable enough. It had been some time since Lincoln and their parents left with their baby sister. No one had said a word until Lori spoke.
By now, the audience left. All the random people believed the performance with drama was exciting, but the ones who knew what was happening believed otherwise.
Lori stood up straight and sighed. "Come on, girls, let's go home."
The drive home was quiet, but the rain pelting against the van's windows was soothing. None of them gave Luan a piece of their mind. It seemed they understood that the girl felt guilty just by looking at her features.
Lori took her time on the wheel, and they soon arrived home without issue.
Stepping out of the vehicle, they all looked to the roof of their house.
Lightning cracked in the sky as Luna and Lincoln traded blows with a bread sword and guitar.
Previously, their fight went through the dining room and kitchen. Lincoln managed to lose her by going upstairs, but Luna chased him into the attic. Now, on the roof, she was beginning to breathe heavily as her stamina caught up to her.
Lincoln chuckled. "Maybe you should have thought twice. I never thought I was going to destroy your guitar too." Then, with his ficelle bread, he struck the guitar in her hands, breaking both the instrument and the loaf in half.
Lincoln stared at her momentarily, his expression filled with pride, before sliding down the roof behind the house, disappearing without a word.
Luna, defeated, climbed down the front of the house. Landing on the front porch, she rubbed her arm as her sisters stared at her wet makeup. She saw the depressed state of them, and knew Lincoln had something to do with it. Her main focus was on Luan, who looked the worst out of all of them.
Lisa, noticing the mood amongst them, pushed her glasses up the bridge of her nose. "Not to worry, girls. It's not over yet. I still have an ace up my sleeve."
The girls all contemplated her words, hoping the war would be over one way or another.