A cat was perfect for spying on the Sharing meeting. For one thing, cats are known for their excellent night vision. And I assumed they had hearing more or less on par with that of humans, so I'd be able to understand anything I overheard. Once it got dark out, I'd be practically invisible. If somebody did see me, who would really think twice about a scruffy little stray prowling around? And then there was the simple fact that the only other morph I had so far was a raven. As much as I enjoyed that morph, I didn't want to rely on it being my only option.

Tobias disappeared out into the hallway, and returned a minute later, gently placing Dude down on his bed. Dude briefly glanced around the room, and started licking the back of his left paw.

"Hey there, gato pequeño, how are you today?"

The little grey cat looked up at me and stared with an air of supreme indifference to my existence. I put my hand between Dude's ears, and focused on acquiring his DNA. He went into a trance, and I could almost feel something electric flowing up through my arm.

"Think I got it," I said, pulling my hand away. Tobias picked up the still entranced Dude, put him out into the hallway, and closed the door.

Trying not to feel self-conscious, I took off my jacket and jeans, leaving just the skintight tank top and shorts I'd picked for my morphing outfit. I sat down on the floor, closed my eyes, took a deep breath, and focused on a mental image of Dude.

The first thing that happened was that my skin changed color, going from my dark brown to Dude's gray-and-black stripes. As I felt myself beginning to shrink, the stripes began sprouting soft fur. My ears crawled up the sides of my head, and a tail shot out of my back. My hands and feet twisted and crunched, rearranging themselves into paws. All the while, I kept shrinking until I was no bigger than a loaf of bread. The last thing that changed was my eyes. I still had normal human vision right up to the end. But then, colors began to fade, and I couldn't even distinguish between red and green.

I was a cat. Muscled, grey, with steel-green eyes, tail balancing at half-mast.

(Woah.)

I felt powerful. My body was a coiled spring, ready to leap into action. Nothing was out of bounds, and there was no obstacle I couldn't climb over or crawl under. And I could hear everything around me, too. I could hear Tobias breathing, his uncle Carl snoring at the other end of the house, a radio blasting bad country music, the real Dude prowling around in the kitchen, another radio in a neighbor's house, the faint buzz of traffic on the highway... but most of all, I could hear something alive scurrying around in the back yard.

Acting on pure impulse, I leapt up onto the windowsill and stared out into the back yard.

(There's mice hiding in the roots under that tree in the corner,) I said, more to myself than to Tobias.

"Uh-oh. Lee? Don't let-"

I ignored him, flew out the window, and raced across the yard. The mice had retreated underground, but there was a small hole under one of the tree roots. The smell told me it was in current use, so I probed in with my front paw, claws extended, ready to rake a furrow red. Licensed to mutilate.

Before I could make any progress, I felt two big hands reach around my ribs and lift me up.

"It's bad enough I had to train the real Dude not to keep doing this, I don't need to go through it with you as well."

Tobias carried me back to the house, dropped me back through the window, and climbed through, closing the window quickly before I could escape again. OK, so there was one obstacle I couldn't conquer.

"What did you think you were doing out there?"

(I am the Mouse Police!)

"Get a grip, Lee. You're letting the animal instincts take over. Remember, you're a girl, not a cat."

Just for a moment, my own reflexes merged with the cat instincts, and I couldn't stop myself from letting out a loud, angry hiss. Tobias jumped back.

(Oh. Sorry.)

I leaped up to the top of the bookshelf - four feet straight up, just like that! - back up to Tobias's eye level.

(Yeah, I didn't realize how strong that impulse was to chase mice. I think I've got it under control now.)

"I know. First time I morphed cat, I had the window closed. Good thing, too, because I didn't have anyone around to help me get back in control. I mean, if I'd actually caught a mouse that first time... I don't want to think how that would've ended."

(Well, thanks for being here to spare me the horrors of mouse-and-apple pie. And I think this morph will do just fine for the mission tonight.)

I bounced down onto the bed and started to demorph. The last of the cat features melted away, and suddenly there was that feeling of nausea. It was really bad this time, and I couldn't stop myself from shaking as I fought to calm my churning stomach. And Tobias was right next to me - there was no hiding any of my distress.

"Hey, are you alright?"

"Do I really look that bad?"

He nodded his head.

"Yep. You're as white as a sheet, and you look like you're trying not to puke. Actually, you looked the same way that first time you demorphed, too."

Well, I couldn't hide it anymore. Not from him, at least.

"I know we've only been doing this for a day, but do you ever feel sick when you demorph?"

He thought about it for a moment.

"Well... it always feels a little bit itchy, but it stops as soon as the morphing is over."

"Hmm. I think I might be the only one, then. I didn't want to say anything the first time because I didn't want Marco to get scared since he's barely willing to do this in the first place. But then it kept happening. Every single time I demorph, I feel a wave of nausea."

"Huh. Why would just one of us get sick like that?"

"Well, I've got one theory, but..." I really, really wanted to tell him - to tell SOMEBODY. But I'd only tried to tell somebody once before, and it just resulted in a shouting match between me and my parents. If I lost Tobias or any of the others as friends over this, I don't think I could've dealt with that loss. Still, he seemed like a decent person... "Look, before I tell you, you've got to promise to keep it a secret, OK? Even from Jake and Marco and the others."

"Oh. I, uh... maybe?"

"Look, it's not something that's going to get us all killed or worse if the wrong people find out. I'm just not ready for more than one person to know about this."

He was very quiet for a few minutes.

"All right, you've got my promise. I won't tell another soul without your permission."

My stomach was churning again, and my limbs went numb. The back of my throat ached terribly, and beads of sweat began dripping down my temples. As willing as I was to finally share my big secret, the psychological stress just might prevent my being able to speak at all - if it didn't just kill me outright. I took a deep breath...

"Short version, I think I was born in the wrong body. Like, I can feel on the inside that I'm supposed to be a boy, but..." I pointed at my chest. "Obviously the outside doesn't match. I've never met anyone else like this, and I don't know if there's even a word for people like me... oh, I don't care what anatomy I've got, I KNOW I'm a boy, I've had this feeling my whole life like my body just isn't right and the only time I've been free of that feeling is when I morphed and... and..."

It was all I could muster up the courage to say for the moment. I looked him straight in the eye, silently pleading, all right, the ball's in your court. Please don't think I'm a freak.

"Hey, you're not a freak."

I could a chill run down my spine - I'd accidentally said that last part out loud! Tobias reached out to put a comforting hand on my shoulder.

"I have no idea what the right word is to describe you, but it's definitely not 'freak'. Well, not because you want to be a boy, anyway. I mean, you can turn into animals, and that's kind of freaky, but then that makes me a freak, too. And Jake, Marco, Rachel, and Cassie."

I couldn't help laughing a little bit at his detour in logic.

"Yeah, that's my best guess about what's going on. Disorientation from a masculine mind reconnecting to a female body. And seriously, don't tell anyone."

"Lee, it doesn't matter if you're a boy or a girl, you're still my friend. I'd feel horrible if I betrayed your trust."

"Well... thanks for hearing me out."

I stood up to retrieve my street clothes, but noticed Tobias was still staring at me.

"Something wrong?" I asked.

"No, I'm trying to imagine you with a moustache."

"You're going to need a lot of imagination for that," I said, as I started pulling my jeans back on, "I'm three parts Indian and one part Asian. Even if I did have a Y chromosome, I don't think facial hair would ever be an option."

"No, I can totally see it - one of those pencil-thin ones. Kind of like Vincent Price."

"Hah!"

I'd heard the word 'euphoria' a few times - a state of great happiness and bliss. And for the first time in my life, I had an idea of what euphoria actually felt like. After sharing my secret, I was feeling better than I had in months. It was the first time since leaving Albuquerque that I'd actually felt happy. And then our mission to spy on the Sharing meeting completely spoiled it.