Author's Note: I only wrote half of this story! Jenna, aka DragonGirl323, is the author of the chapters from Edward's POV; she contributed all of Edward's dialogue; & she gets beta credit for this as well.
We tore each other's clothes off frantically, desperate to have no barriers between us, but once we were fully exposed and vulnerable, knowing there was no turning back, there was an uncomfortable pause. He was hovering over me and we locked gazes for a long moment. Edward looked like he was deep in thought, and I was trying to clear my mind, push away the very complicated mess of thoughts in my head.
Perhaps he caught my deep-seated sense of affection beneath all the worry because he began running his fingertips over my skin—across my shoulder and over the swell of my breasts and down my stomach, where I felt the tension gathering. He slid his hand over, pressing the side of his palm into the dip between the curve of my stomach and edge of my hipbone and I felt a flutter beneath his hand. A tremor vibrated in the cradle of my hips as he explored me with his eyes and fingers, his gaze fixed on my body. His lips curled into a wicked smile and he glanced up, his eyes blazing as they met mine. I didn't need to read his mind to know what he was thinking.
I was rapidly growing desperate for it. I started panting—such a human thing to do. Carlisle and I had discussed almost every seemingly surprising detail of this, what happened and why. The escalated breathing was likely a sexual reflex, like when we hunted so you were infiltrated with the smell of your prey, making you completely focused. And it was working beautifully. So many reminders of humanity occurred, but swift and captivating enough for my vampire senses.
Edward let out a sigh and it almost seemed like a signal, the tiny muscles of his eyes contracting, widening the pupils, making his eyes look darker, like a hungry predator in the night. I knew that meant he could see me even better, and I noted my vision sharpen as well. I inhaled on his exhale, his scent infiltrating me to the point where I could almost taste him. I felt the venom collect underneath my tongue, leak down the back of my throat, creating a feigning sense of thirst. I bit my lip, an unconscious reaction to the desire to have something to sink my teeth into. He growled low in his throat, crouched over me, completely focused on my every reaction, waiting for the perfect moment to make his move. I clenched my teeth and exhaled through them-both of us making sounds that came out as inviting when made so slightly, but given just a little more force, they would have been bestial and threatening. It was all I could do not to just shove him on his back and pounce on him. The time it took for me to take two breaths—that is how quickly it happened.
For almost ninety years I hadn't been with anyone except Carlisle, and an unexpected shyness overtook me as Edward stared at my body suddenly. I shifted my hips slightly, probably only bringing more attention to my nervousness. He moved above me, lowering his hips down between my thighs. I licked my lips, my eyes locked on his erection, and I felt myself open deep inside, aching to be filled. He grinned at me as his body slid up over mine and he propped himself up with one arm, his elbow tucked beneath my arm so we were eye to eye. I felt him aroused and trembling against my lower abdomen, making me gasp.
"Edward," I whispered as his hand slipped down between my legs, not without some trepidation. But I opened them wide beneath him in invitation, thinking about how I liked to be touched.
My reaction was violent as he explored me, a flood of pleasure pooled in the depths of my hips almost instantly, and with the first tender, explorative brushes of his fingertips over the center of my desire, I cried out, the instant tightening between my legs shocking. I couldn't remember the last time I had responded so passionately to so little attention.
"Esme," he hissed, likely just as surprised as I was, massaging me harder and faster as I peaked. I liked that because he could read my thoughts, he knew I wasn't calculating it—that it was my honest, helpless reaction to his touch.
I felt the rush of wetness between my legs, and I began to tremble. Though it was impossible, I quickly began to feel overheated as I pushed my hips up into his hand. I was desperate to have him inside of me, but another wave of pleasure washed over me quickly, making me gasp then moan on the exhale. I closed my eyes tightly, my lips parting as I sucked in a breath while his fingers entered me. Wrapping my arms around his body, holding onto him firmly, rocking my hips up to meet each thrust as he buried three of his fingers into me as far as they would go. It was thrilling, but it wasn't enough. Still, he carried on until I was mad with being taunted.
Just as I was on the verge of begging for it, he pulled his fingers out swiftly. Our eyes met briefly, and it happened so quickly, maybe he was worried he would lose his nerve, but he was slowly inching his way inside of me. He brought his hand to my cheek, gently rubbing his thumb over my skin before tracing my parted lips with his finger. Then, he slid his hands across my body as if I was delicate, not the unbreakable thing I really am. It made me feel nearly human again—the tender way he moved inside of me at first, the small sound of shock that escaped his lips when he had entered me fully.
I wasn't sure if he had done it on purpose, if he was reading my thoughts, the faint undercurrent beneath my worry, if he was making an effort, or if it was just a complete accident, but he moved deeper inside of me, hitting a spot that made me whimper. And he responded with a surprised sound of pleasure.
"There," I sighed and he obediently thrusted into me again. "Oh, yes," I moaned, my passion escalating at an alarming rate once again. I felt it sear though my veins like heated blood.
He sighed my name again, a somewhat pained expression crossing his features.
I slid one hand around his lower back and gripped his shoulder with the other. His reply was to grab my hip with one hand as he held himself up with the other arm. He pulled me up toward him. I elevated my hips so that he could drive down into me. The new position allowed him to go deeper into my body and I bit back a scream, my bottom lip between my teeth.
"Take me, Edward," I gasped.
That seemed to excite him. Perhaps he was still hanging onto the idea that I was a lady, even so far into this. I looked up at him to see his eyes dark and seething with passion. He looked close to frantic. I knew we were both more than primed and pining for it, but I think he began to hold back on purpose. I tipped my head back as he reached up to lace his fingers through my hair.
I allowed myself to let go then, I sank fully into my fantasies, pretending that he wasn't just inside of me for release but because he found me irresistible. I told myself that the sounds that escaped his lips were my body giving him thrills, hoping that the fact that what we were doing was so wrong gave him the same delicious chills that it was giving me. I made no effort to shield my thoughts. We had both tried so hard to keep ourselves restrained in so many ways. I just wanted him to go wild on me.
He must have heard my thoughts because he growled—a guttural sound emerging from deep in his chest. I dropped my hips and he pounded into me.
"Don't break the couch," I said as he reached up to brace himself against the armrest.
He chuckled, shaking his head and smiling. "Don't break the couch. Right."
I was surprised at my own reaction, that his sweet little laugh caused a shot of delight to race through me. My body tightened around his and we both cried out. I reached up, running my hands over his shoulders, digging my fingers into his flesh as he lowered his body over mine. He had shed his inhibitions, and I liked watching him use me to pleasure himself. I outright laughed with a mixture of joy and relief when I felt my passion crescendo. We peaked together and I screamed with the release, my eyes closing tightly, the ecstasy so forceful that I thought the rush of it might rupture my arteries as it coursed through my entire body. I wasn't sure if his delayed reaction was because I had surprised him or not. But there was a short silence before he gasped, exhaling in a long, deep throated moan as we rode out the final waves of rapture.
We both relaxed and it was a moment before he eased out of me, reaching for a blanket on the back of the couch to cover us. I cuddled up to him as he wrapped his arm around me. It was a protective gesture; one that I settled into thankfully.