(Watch for POV changes)
"Pass me the peas, Aunt Bee?" Opie asked Aunt Bee at the table. Andy had invited Barney and Thelma Lou over for dinner. It had been since before Andy and Helen broke up two months before that they all last spent time over a meal together.
"Well, this is nice," Thelma Lou asserted. There was a bit of an awkward pause. "Everyone back together, here at the table, just having a nice meal together."
"Well, not everyone." Barney said quietly. Thelma Lou thumped Barney's leg under the table and Andy glared.
"What was that, Barney?" Aunt Bee asked worried he needed something.
"Oh, it was nothing, Aunt Bee," Thelma Lou assured her.
"So how've you two young'uns been? Staying out of trouble, I hope?" Aunt Bee asked Barney and Thelma, with a pleasant smile.
"We've been swell," Thelma replied with gratitude.
"Well, as swell as we can be..." Barney muttered as he took a drink, "under the circumstances..."
"'Under the circumstances?" Andy chirped curiously, somehow knowing where this was going.
"Oh, it's nothing," Barney said, but seeing as everyone was not as curious as he expected them to be and simply carried on with their dinners, he pressed on, "It's just that... three friends can't be happy when they know one of them is lonely."
"Barney!" Thelma Lou tried to hush him.
"Oh, will you stop worryin' about my romantic life for once in your life?!"
"I'm simply concerned for your well-being, it's my job as your friend-"
"Your job? Since when did I ever tell you it was your job to make sure I am fixed up with someone before..."
"Before what, Andy? You see, you see? You've got to act quick! You've gotta get hitched before... Well, Andy, you had Helen in the palm of your hand, if you just would have-"
"Helen and I are broken up beyond repair, and it's all my fault. There ain't no goin' back, y'hear?" There were a few seconds of even more intensely awkward silence. "Now just... drop it. An' enjoy the meal Aunt Bee worked hard to lay out in front o' you." Andy began digging into his food angrily.
Thelma Lou nudged Barney's shoulder and motioned her head toward the kitchen. Barney looked confused, to which Thelma Lou answered with another more animated motion, which was read with the same amount of misunderstanding.
"Oh, for heaven's sake, would you see me in the kitchen, please?" Thelma stood up and marched into the kitchen, and Barney got up.
"Gotta obey the old girl sometimes..." Barney laughed nervously.
"BARNEY," Thelma Lou barked from the kitchen. Barney jumped.
"If you'll excuse me," and he walked quickly to the kitchen, where he faced a less-than-impressed girlfriend.
"Well?"
"Well, what?"
"How are you going to lighten the mood after that catastrophe?"
"Thelma, the man has to find out sooner or later, I just thought I'd tell him sooner so's to keep him-"
"That doesn't answer my question, Barney. You've just made it completely awkward for everyone. And- and it's not like you're hurrying to get married either, is it?"
"Now, hold on just a minute! You and me are a totally different story, we're an entirely different can of worms!"
"And can you tell me exactly how so?"
"Well-"
"Oh, Andy you should be ashamed of yourself, losing your temper at the dinner table."
"Aunt Bee, you have to admit that Barney was bein' ridiculous!"
"Andy, I admit that he was ridiculous... but I can just as confidently say he is the definition of ridiculous."
"Pa, may I be excused?"
"Yes, Opie, you may."
"No, Opie, you may not," Aunt Bee quipped.
"Opie ain't a part of any of this, Aunt Bee!"
"No, he isn't, but he's got to finish his potatoes before he can be excused."
"What?"
"You heard me? ...H-how 'bout it, Thel?"
"I- I'm sorry, I just need to sit down for a second..." Thelma Lou sat on a small stool next to the counter.
"Y'see, if Andy were to see us, maybe he wouldn't drag his feet so much..." Barney said quietly.
"Well, that's hardly the reason I'd want to be asked for," Thelma Lou sighed.
"Oh, Thelma, you know how I feel about you. It wouldn't be the only reason at all. I mean... I love you, don't I?" Thelma Lou smiled big.
"Andy, that's a horrible thing to say! Opie, go on up to your room, you've eaten quite enough," Aunt Bee said.
"Sometimes the truth feels horrible, Aunt Bee," Andy muttered as Opie walked to the stairs. Suddenly, the kitchen door swung wide open.
"Opie, come down off those stairs! I've got an announcement to make," Barney hollered to Opie.
"Aww, man," Opie said, and reluctantly came back down and stood in the livingroom.
"Th-Thelma Lou... and I... Thelma Lou and me, we... See, the thing is-" Barney stumbled.
"We're getting married!" Thelma Lou helped Barney. Immediately, Aunt Bee skyrocketed out of her chair and she and Opie ran up to the couple to congratulate them. Andy looked slightly skeptical for a second, then slapped on a half-grin and stood up to follow suit. The small group exchanged many hugs, handshakes and laughs.