Author's Note: Hiya! Here is the 2nd (and last part) of this twoshot! (Why do you think it's called a twoshot? I mean, really?) I'm terribly sorry for keeping you waiting! And thanks to the people who reviewed, followed and favourited!
So, all I can say is…
It's here.
What we've all been waiting for…
GET READY FOR SOME HUGHES AND SPIRIT AWESOMENESS! XD (And a little mentioning of Ed and Al for fun :D)
Random Did You Know fact of the day:
Did you know that if Death the Kid wrote his entire name in capitals, all the letters would be symmetrical? I'm serious! Take a look at each letter and you'll find they're all symmetrical in capitals! Some of them are only symmetrical when cut in half vertically, some only when cut in half horizontally, but they're all still symmetrical!
Death the Kid (no symmetry D:)
DEATH THE KID (symmetry! :D)
ANYWHO!
Chapter 2
Normal POV
The negotiations with Lord Death were over, and Roy Mustang and Maes Hughes were exiting the DWMA, with help from the death scythe Spirit Albarn, of course, seeing as Kid was now in class.
They had made it to the main entrance when Spirit gave the two Amestrians a wave.
"What are you gonna do now?" Spirit asked. "Your flight back to Amestris is in 4 hours, you have plenty of time to kill."
"We're going to have something to eat." Roy answered, without even turning around. "Let's go Hughes." He turned around only to find Hughes right in front of Spirit.
"Hughes, what are you doing?" the Colonel asked, slightly irritated.
"I really need to show you something. It's important." Hughes said to the Death Scythe, his eyebrows furrowed in seriousness and a glare shining on the lenses of his glasses; which reminded the redhead Albarn of a certain professor. Roy knew where this was going, and he didn't want to see it again.
Hughes then gained a cheerful, admiring look and pulled out a little envelope; opening it up in less than a second and a long slip of paper with photos going down it unfolded and hung from the envelope, reaching the ground. "Take a look at my gorgeous wife Gracia and my adorable little daughter Elicia! AREN'T THEY SO LOVELY?!" Maes exclaimed; the glare fading from his glasses, revealing a pair of shining hazel orbs behind them.
Most people who Hughes showed the photos to, as Roy Mustang knew, just either got irritated and walked off or got annoyed and growled at Hughes to get lost and go back to work. However, it seemed, to the Colonel's surprise, that Spirit was a complete exception.
"AWW!" Spirit squealed. "THE DAUGHTER IS ADORABLE!" it was his turn to boast about his family with shining eyes (think about his shiny-eyes face from Soul Eater episode 40 when he sees Medusa's baby bloomers/pumpkin panties). "You know, I have a gorgeous daughter called Maka! She's a one-star meister in this Academy's EAT class! She's so smart and skilled, just like her mama, Kami!"
Hughes got the same shiny-eyed face as Spirit. "REALLY?!" He exclaimed in excitement.
"YEAH!" Spirit answered equally as excited. He pulled out a photo of his daughter from her fifteenth birthday (Maka didn't want him at the celebration so Spirit had to kinda stalk his daughter in order to get the picture).
"OH MY GOSH!" Hughes exclaimed. The two of them did a high five with both hands and sang in perfect unison "Our daughters are wonderfuuuuull~!
Lord Death came out to the main entrance and stood next to Roy.
"Looks like Hughes found a kindred spirit." The flame alchemist said plainly, both he and the reaper sweatdropping. "No pun intended."
"Hey, Roy!" Hughes called to the Colonel with a wave. "I'm gonna go with Spirit for a while. We'll meet back up here okay? See ya later!"
He and Spirit ran down the Academy steps while Lord Death and Roy Mustang both stood at the main entrance, right next to each other.
"Those two are so alike." The grim reaper and state alchemist both said at the same time, sweatdropping once more.
Spirit and Hughes babbled on about their families until they got to the Death Scythe's apartment. Spirit turned the key in the lock and flung the door open with a loud slam. Spirit rushed to his bedroom and pulled out a photo album. He grabbed Hughes' wrist until the Lieutenant Colonel followed by himself. Both of them went back up to the Academy, which was no more than a ten minute walk, seeing as how Spirit was a Death Scythe and he needed to live close to the DWMA in case of an emergency where he was needed by Lord Death. When they got back to the Academy, they sat on seats in one of the hallways and began babbling away even more.
"So this is Elicia when she was born," Maes said with starry eyes, showing his new found friend a picture of Elicia as a newborn infant. "And this is her when she turned three AAAAAH! ISN'T SHE ADORABLE!"
"REALLY!" Spirit squealed.
"This is my wonderful Maka when she was born!" Spirit made his classic 'ooh-it's-Medusa-wiff-adorable-widdle-baby-bwoomer s!' face and opened to the first page in the album. The first photo was Maka as a baby, wrapped up in a cloth as olive green as her eyes and she was sucking her thumb.
"AWW!" Maes exclaimed. "THAT'S ADORABAWE! She's sucking her thumb!~" he adapted the same stupid-and-somewhat-creepy-yet-absolutely-make-you -piss-your-pants-laughing-hilarious facial expression as Spirit.
(A/N: Try to imagine Hughes adorning the baby bloomers face without grinning or busting out laughing. I bet it's impossible XD. If you DO manage to do it, then watch on YouTube a video about John Swasey (Lord Death's voice actor) answering the question 'Who is Kid's mum?' asked by a Death the Kid cosplayer (I don't own it though), it's funny, but even though it's in English they put subtitles in just in case the video viewer couldn't hear what they were saying, and the subtitles may or may not ruin the joke before you hear them say it. IF you can survive that too, as well as the Roy Mustang 'I love dogs' and 'tiny miniskirt' lines, then you surely must do absolutely nothing with your life.)
"And this is when she turned two!" Spirit pointed to another photo.
"AWWWW!" Hughes exclaimed. He pulled out another photo of Elicia. "This is Elicia eating apple pie! It's so cute how she's got the pastry on her face!~"
"Mh hmn!" Spirit nodded. "Adowable!"
"Check this out!" the Death Scythe flipped a page in his album and pointed to another picture. "Little Maka is angry!"
"Haha!" Hughes laughed. "She's puffing out her cute widdle cheeks!"
The Lieutenant Colonel then proceeded to show Spirit several pictures of Elicia eating and playing with a ball, while in return, Spirit showed Hughes some pictures of Maka on her six birthday, seventh, eighth, ninth, tenth and eleventh. In the picture of Maka's eighth birthday, the young Albarn girl was wearing a party hat and blowing a party whistle with a birthday cake in front of her, which made the two daughter-obsessed fathers, two grown men, squeal like Royai fangirls finding out that Royai was a cannon pairing. Spirit then flipped onto a page in his album with pictures of himself reading to his four-year-old Maka.
"So cute!" Maes cooed. "You're reading to Maka!"
"Yup!" Spirit smiled proudly. "Today, Maka loves to read books. She's practically a bookworm. I love to look back at her to when I used to read her stories and think of how good a papa I was for giving her that love of books that she has today! It makes me proud! She's the top of her class in tests, which makes me even more proud!"
Hughes than pulled out a picture but turned it so that the plain back was facing Spirit.
"Hey?!" the Albarn exclaimed. "Aren't you gonna show me the picture?" he reached out to take the photo off of Maes but the Amestrian just pulled it close to his chest so Spirit couldn't see it.
"Uh, uh u~uh!" Hughes teased. "No peekies~!"
Spirit urged him to. "Why aren't you showing me?!"
"Okay. I'm ready to show you." The Lieutenant Colonel answered. He slowly turned the picture around, that's when….
"OH MY GOSH THAT'S ADORABLE!" Spirit exclaimed with a squeal. It was a picture of Elicia in nappies (A/N: Diapers) with a dummy in her mouth and she was playing with a stuffed bear, hugging it with a cute and innocent look on her face. The Death Scythe was sick of sitting still. He got up, and twirled around like a dancer on short notice.
"Ahhhh!" he cooed. "Elicia Hughes… is SOOO~… CUUUUTE!"
Hughes joined in and they both sang that Elicia was cute. Suddenly, Spirit regained his soul's maturity and dignity as a man and he got serious. He then moved over to his photo album, on the chair and picked it up, flipping pages until he got to one of Maka's first visit to the park.
His new, bespectacled Amestrian friend gaped in awe at the picture. For one reason: there was NO chance that he could ever handle THAT sort of cuteness.
They started spinning around in happiness, the same thing as before, but this time saying: "Ahhhhh! Maka Albarn…is SOOO~… CUUUUTE!"
"OOH! Elicia playing with an old tin soldier!" Spirit exclaimed as Hughes showed him another picture. Maes pulled out another picture of Elicia. In the picture she was with a short, blonde, golden-eyed boy wearing a black 'vest' (A/N: I think that's what it is), pants and a red trench coat with the alchemy flamel on the back. The boy also had gloves on his hands and was smirking in the photo with his hands clapped together. Spirit noticed that a bit of the boy's right arm in the photo was showing underneath his sleeve. It appeared to be… metal? Next to Elicia and the short boy was a 'man' who was 'wearing' a suit of armour, with the alchemy flamel on one of the shoulders of the armour. The armoured figure was ruffling Elicia's hair with one hand and making a peace sign with the other.
"Huh?" the Death Scythe asked. "Who are those two?"
"Oh, right!" Hughes answered. "They're Alchemists, the Elric brothers. They're pretty renowned in Amestris. The older brother, Edward, is a State Alchemist, the Fullmetal Alchemist; and is under Roy's command. His younger brother, Alphonse, is also an alchemist, but is not a member of the State. They're good alchemists and can perform Alchemy without a transmutation circle, which is something all normal alchemists need to use in order to perform alchemy. That alchemic technique is what got Ed certified as a State Alchemist. That's why he's got that pocket watch, the official State Alchemist pocket watch. You can see its chain hanging from his pocket in the photo. I'm not an alchemist. Roy is, so ask him if you want more info about alchemy."
"Is Fullmetal like Ed's codename or something?" Spirit asked. "Because Roy said the Flame Alchemist is his."
"Yup." Maes replied.
"Well I can see where he got the name Fullmetal." Spirit said. "After all, he is wearing a giant suit of ar–"
Hughes' laugh interrupted the Death Scythe.
"No! No! No! No! No!" Maes said with a chuckle. "That's what everyone thinks at first sight, but the one in the armour is actually Al, the younger brother! The older brother, Ed, is the blonde guy!"
"Seriously?!" Spirit gaped. "Then one, why is he called Fullmetal; and two, why is he a midget?"
"You know," Hughes said, "you and Ed have extremely similar voices! And to answer your questions. Firstly, he's called Fullmetal because he has metal prosthetic limbs called automail; he has an automail right arm and left leg. And secondly, nobody knows why Ed is so short, but the people that Ed knows all think it's because he doesn't drink milk. Either that, or his automail weighs him down and stops him from growing too much in height. But if you ever go to Amestris and see Ed in person, never call him short, a runt, microscopic, half-pint, bean sprout, midget, half-pint bean sprout midget, little, tiny, flea, shrimp, tiny amoeba or anything along those lines; basically anything that could imply that he's small or vertically challenged. Because he absolutely hates people bringing it up, and will lose his temper and attempt to brutally murder anyone who calls him anything meaning short. Ed and Al like spending time with Elicia."
"Anyway," Death Scythe changed the subject. He pointed to a picture in his album, "here is Maka with her mama when she was little."
"AWWW!" Hughes exclaimed. "So, that's what her mother looks like?"
Spirit nodded and blushed. "Kami!"
The two of them started sharing even more cute pictures.
"Ooh!" Hughes grinned. "Take a look at Eliciaaaaa~!" in the picture, Maes was tickling his daughter under the arms. Spirit burst out laughing at Elicia's red cheeks in the photo and fell off his chair whilst still laughing.
The two continued to share photos of the precious and adorable daughters. Their chuckling and chatting was cut off, however, when a bell rang.
"Huh?" Maes raised an eyebrow while frozen in a position of holding up a picture of a one-year-old Elicia sleeping against her mother's chest, "What's that bell for?"
"It signifies the start of lunch." Spirit explained. "The students will be heading out of class now."
They continued to look at photos of their daughters.
IN THE DWMA CAFETERIA
Maka, Soul, Black Star, Tsubaki, Death the Kid, Liz, Patty and Crona were seated at a table and eating lunch. They were conversing with each other when Maka decided to bring up something with Kid.
"Hey Kid," The Albarn scythe meister said.
"What is it?" Kid asked.
"Why were you late for class?" Maka asked.
"Yeah," Tsubaki said, "I was worried. I'm sure everyone was a bit worried, right?"
Liz, Crona and Maka nodded in agreement to Tsubaki's statement while Patty just laughed, Soul just kept cool and Black Star boasted that "Worrying was too below a big star."
"So, why were you late?" Soul asked. "You gonna tell us or what?"
"Was it something important?" Maka asked.
Kid nodded and everyone looked at him, ready to listen.
"Well," the young reaper answered, "my father asked me to escort to the Death Room some people here for negotiations."
"People here for negotiations?" Liz repeated.
"Who were they?" Maka asked.
"They were people from the military of a foreign country called Amestris that is well-developed in Alchemy."
"Alchemy?" Tsubaki asked. "What do you mean?"
"I'm not very sure what it does exactly." Kid answered. "My father mentioned a little bit about alchemy to me. He said it was a science, so it's not actually magic. It revolves around the principle of equivalent exchange; that mankind cannot gain something without giving something in return. This basically means, I guess, that your input must be of the same mass or value as your output; I don't know. It is quite complicated, and involves learning the chemical structures of the object you're transmuting by analysing its structure, deconstructing the matter and reconstructing it into something else. That's all he told me, as well as that the military in that country, called the State, certifies skilled alchemists who pass an alchemy exam and become part of the State as State Alchemists. Two people were coming from Amestris to represent the State."
"Who were the people?" Maka asked.
"One of them has black hair and grey eyes. He's a State Alchemist, known as the Flame Alchemist; Colonel Roy Mustang. The second person isn't a State Alchemist, just a normal soldier or State member. From what he told me, he heads the research and investigation division in the State, and is known as Lieutenant Colonel Maes Hughes. Maes has side-and-back-slicked black hair as well as hazel eyes and glasses. They're wearing the State uniform, which is blue. It is hard to describe what it looks like, but you can tell from sight that it's a military uniform." The young reaper answered.
"Okay." Maka nodded, satisfied with the answer.
"Also," Kid added, "I learnt a bit about how they act when talking to them. Roy is focused, serious and stern. (A/N: Yeah, right! You haven't even seen the 'tiny miniskirts' or 'I love dogs' speeches yet, Kid!) Hughes however, appears like he could be serious if he wanted, but is generally quite laid-back. He was scared of the guillotine gates on the way to the Death Room and even somewhat scared of me when he found out that I was a grim reaper and the son of Death himself."
"Guess he's not used to stuff like that where he's from." Liz said as she chowed down a slice of bread.
Kid nodded.
"Ha ha! That guy must be such a dumb coward!" Ragnarock remarked, coming out of Crona's back.
Maka shot the demon sword a threatening look which caused Ragnarock to roll his eyes and retreat back into Crona's body, bored about the conversation.
"S-sorry about Ragnarock." Crona stuttered, "He's m-more b-bored than usual."
"Nah, it's fine!" Patty chimed; then she looked over at the display food the cafeteria staff were putting out. "OOH! SIS THEY HAVE GIRAFFE SHAPED CHOCY-CHIP COOKIES! CAN I HAVE ONE PWEEEAAAASE?!" the younger Thompson sister made puppy dog eyes to her older sister.
"Okay," Liz said with a sigh, "But only three maximum, okay?"
Patty nodded eagerly. "Okie dokie sis." She said innocently. Then Liz went off to the cafeteria line with Patty following behind, bouncing like a puppy.
The eight of them (including Liz and Patty once they bought the cookies and sat back down) continued to talk through lunch in the cafeteria.
~ONE LUNCH TIME OF CHATTING AND PATTY EATING *munch munch* *speaks with mouth full* SURPRISINGLY REALLY GOOD GIRAFFE-SHAPED CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIES LATER
The eight friends ended their chatter and left the table to get their belongings ready for class. Maka was walking through the halls and pondered for a minute.
'What Kid was talking about in lunch. Alchemy and that country, Amestris, it sounds interesting. Maybe I should go to Amestris some time and start studying alchemy. I'm good with science and I'm a straight A student, I'm sure I could get someone to teach me. I learn very fast too. I'm sure getting a basic transmutation done shouldn't take more than half a week of studying.' She was cut out of her thoughts, however, when she bumped into someone.
"I'm sorry! I–" she began to apologize but she was silenced when she saw who she bumped into. The figure Maka bumped into was a man about her father's height. He had black hair with bangs that fell over his forehead and startling, sharp, dark-grey eyes. On his hands he had bleach-white gloves with patterned circles etched on them that reminded the scythe meister of magic circles and the man was in a blue, obviously-military uniform that had light grey on the borders. Maka immediately realized that the man was one of the Amestrian military officers that Kid described. She recognized the man out of the descriptions Kid gave her of both men. The military man put a hand on Maka's shoulder to help her steady.
"You're alright, I see miss." The man said, "Luckily."
"You're…" Maka blinked, "Colonel Roy Mustang, the Flame Alchemist. That State Alchemist military officer from Amestris."
Roy raised an eyebrow. "You know about me?" he asked, "No one here knows much about people from Amestris. Have you travelled to Amestris before?"
"No, actually." Maka shook her head. "But I heard about you a while ago in lunch from my friend, Kid."
"Kid?" Roy asked, "You mean Death the Kid?"
Maka nodded. "He said he escorted you to the Death Room on the way here."
"I see. You're a friend of his." Roy said, "What's your name?"
"Ah! Of course!" Maka answered, "I'm Maka Albarn, one-star scythe meister, from the EAT class."
Roy raised an eyebrow again. "Albarn? Like that Death Scythe, Spirit Albarn?"
"Yes." Maka answered, glancing at the ground in annoyance, "Looks like you've already met my good-for-nothing papa." She spoke 'good-for-nothing papa' in a low and annoyed tone.
"So you're the daughter of Spirit that he was talking about to Hughes!" Mustang realized, remembering Spirit's reaction and addition to the conversation he had with Hughes when the Lieutenant Colonel showed him a picture of Gracia and Elicia.
"My papa was talking about me to the other officer who came with you, Lieutenant Colonel Maes Hughes?" Maka asked.
"Yes." Roy answered, "and let me guess, Death the Kid told you about Hughes as well?"
Maka nodded. "Just call him Kid. It's fine. By the way, you're a State Alchemist, and I just thought."
"Yes, what is it?" Mustang asked.
"I find the concept of alchemy very interesting," The scythe meister answered, "and I was wondering if there was any way I could study alchemy."
Roy raised an eyebrow. "You want to study alchemy?"
Maka nodded, and rubbed the back of her neck. "I don't like bragging or anything, but I'm the top of my class. I'm a straight-A student so everything is quite easy for me in class. I learn very well, love books and I do quite well in science, so I thought that taking a look at learning about alchemy might be useful and interesting."
"I see." The Amestrian Colonel thought for a few moments. "If you get time, you can travel to Amestris and borrow out books on Alchemy at a local library. Or you could get someone to teach you, though there aren't many people who actually teach alchemy. Though one of my subordinates, a State Alchemist like me, the Fullmetal Alchemist Edward Elric, is your age. He's a prodigy in Alchemy and he doesn't mind helping people out at all. If you want, you could go to Amestris some time and see him or talk to him over the phone and see if he'll teach you. I'm sure he wouldn't mind. But just be aware that if you do see him, don't call him short, little, tiny, beansprout, midget anything that means short or vertically-challenged otherwise he will lose his temper." (A/N: Hypocrite! HE loves calling Ed short!) Mustang pulled out from his pocket a small piece of paper and a pencil and wrote down a sequence of numbers on it. He handed the paper to Maka. "If you want to see him, you can contact him by this phone number."
"Okay, thanks." Maka put the paper in the pocket of her yellow sweater (A/N: The one that she wears over her white-long sleeved shirt. It's more of a vest I guess because it doesn't have a collar or sleeves)
"Well," Roy said, turning and starting to walk off, "I'm starting to wonder what Hughes is even doing. He said that he was going off to do something with your father and that he would meet me back at the front of the building but he didn't give any other details."
"Wait," Maka began before Mustang turned back around, "you said earlier that my papa was with Lieutenant Colonel Hughes talking about me. What exactly went on?"
"Well, I can tell you this," Roy replied, "Maes can get serious when he needs to, but most of the time he is laid back and can get a bit more than annoying. Reason being that he is absolutely obsessed with his wife Gracia and daughter Elicia. He carries around photos of them everywhere he goes and loves to show people pictures of them for no apparent reason other than what appears to be showing off his family. He showed a picture of his wife and daughter to your father who pulled out a picture of you and showed it to Hughes. I don't know where they are now though."
A tick mark formed on Maka's head. "Why he…" she growled.
"What grudge do you hold against your dad anyway?" Colonel Mustang asked.
"He is a pervert who can't help but flirt and he cheated all the time on my mama. I absolutely hate his half-witted guts! My mama called a divorce. I look up to her so much. She defended herself so strong and sternly. She was practically the second-best meister to ever graduate from here, second to Professor Stein. She and Stein were also both Spirit's meisters, Stein was his first one and my mama second. Mama was the one who made my good-for-nothing papa into a Death Scythe." The pigtailed scythe meister answered. She turned and looked at Roy. "You're looking for Lieutenant Colonel Maes Hughes, and you said that he went off with my papa right?"
"Yes," Roy answered "Why?"
"I have a special ability to see souls called Soul Perception." Maka explained, "It's a technique I got from my mama. Mine is quite advanced and I can see souls within a radius larger than Death City. I can also recognize the souls of people I know by looking at their personalities which are displayed through their souls. Hughes and my papa are both off somewhere in the same place; so if I find my papa's soul with my soul perception, I can pinpoint where he is and find him easily. Hughes will also be there with him."
"That sounds like a good idea." Mustang answered, "Besides, staying with you is probably the best thing I can do since I don't know this place and could easily get lost."
Maka nodded. "I'll look for their souls now." She closed her eyes, opened them again and focused. She glanced around the hall until she caught sight of Hughes and Spirit's souls. "Found them! They're this way." She walked in the direction of the two passionate fathers, Roy following behind. What Spirit didn't know, was that he really had something coming.
BACK TO SPIRIT AND HUGHES' BABY PHOTO GOODNESS
"Ooh!" Hughes was gaping in awe at a picture of a little toddler Maka playing with a pile of building blocks.
"Oh yeah?" Spirit looked at his Amestrian friend. He pulled out what appeared to be eight to ten photos and held them in his hands, fanned out like they were playing cards. "Little Maka TENFOLD!"
"Little Elicia tenfooolldd~" Hughes sang, doing the same as Spirit but with photos of Elicia. He made the infamous Medusa-Baby-Bloomers face "Cuute~".
"OOH!" Spirit squealed. "Elicia in Bloomers! How adorable! My Maka wore those when she was widdle! So cute and sweet widdle Baby Bloomers!" he also made the shiny-eyed face heavily notorious for making people dead through suffocation by laughing.
"What's she doing in that one?" he asked Hughes, pointing to one of the pictures.
"She was trying to practice some sort of movement thing that she started making up. I think it's supposed to be some sort of martial art. Elicia-te or A-do-rable."
Spirit giggled. "Really suits the names! It sure is cute! Love the word play! HAHA!"
They continued to search through photos. However, then…
Maka CHOP!
In the blink of an eye, Spirit was on the ground with blood comically spurting from his head while Hughes was staring in confusion and Maka was shooting her father a death glare, with a thick book in her hand.
"YOU IDIOT!" Maka roared. "WHY THE HECK DID YOU DO THIS?!"
Spirit immediately went to the nearest emo corner, which just happened to be about five metres down to the end of the hallway (should've chosen a place further away). Maka stormed over to her father and growled at him, getting him out of the emo corner.
"I can't believe you! You idiot! You constantly flirted with other women when you already had my mama! You had to divorce mama on her call, then you go flirt with more women, try to then get my love back when you still flirt, and now you're showing photos of me when I was young to a LIEUTENANT COLONEL of a FOREIGN MILITARY?! WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU, YOU PERVERT?!" Maka gave Spirit another Maka-Chop to the head. Roy and Hughes looked on plainly, keeping out of an Albarn family feud, obviously by miracle having figured it out that soon, though it wasn't really a feud unless Spirit started 'fighting'.
Lord Death came down the hallway from the Death Room to see what Spirit and Hughes were doing; and when he got there, he heard the whole thing. Including Maka's mini rant:
"I can't believe you! You idiot! You constantly flirted with other women when you already had my mama! You had to divorce mama on her call, then you go flirt with more women, try to then get my love back when you still flirt, and now you're showing photos of me when I was young to a LIEUTENANT COLONEL of a FOREIGN MILITARY?! WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU, YOU PERVERT?!" the grim reaper went over to Roy and Hughes and looked at the two Albarns as well.
"What happened here?" Lord Death asked Roy.
"I'm not sure, but I think what Maka's shouting is self-explanatory." Roy answered.
"So you met Maka, hmm?" the reaper said, cocking his head to the side.
"That's what Maka acts like?" Hughes was surprised.
"Yes." Lord Death answered plainly. "You see, Maka and Spirit's family life and relationship are a little bit… complicated. Maka is an EAT class student and one star scythe meister who has a special and rare grigori soul along with an anti-magic wavelength. It was her who defeated the powerful Kishin, Asura."
"I heard about that kishin." Roy said.
"Well, that's enough now! Maka!" Lord Death called to Maka, but she didn't hear him. Maka picked up the photo album, this time, shoved loose photos back in it and raised it above Spirit's head.
"Makaaaaaa…"
CHOP!
"He got OWNED dude!" Soul said quietly from behind the corner.
"FOOL! A father-daughter feud can have a tragic backstory! Do you want to wield me and receive glory?"
"No thanks, I'm a weapon, not a meister. Wait– What the hell?! Excalibur?!"
~WE ARE CURRENTLY EXPERIENCING TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES, PLEASE STAND BY *BEEEEEEEEEEPPPPPPPP* SO TO FILL YOUR DAY UNTIL THIS DIFFICULTY IS FIXED, HERE IS A MONTAGE OF BLACK STAR FAILING~
Black Star is thrown up into the air by an enemy. "Hey look! I can fly!"
The assassin is trying to sneak up on Tsubaki at a hot spring mountain area. He climbs the wall, looks in at Tsubaki, but sees that she's in the water with only a towel wrapped around her and that the hot spring is full of NOTHING BUT GIRLS. The girls start panicking and screaming at the 'peeking tom'. Black Star starts shouting "AAAAAAHHHHHH!" but then Tsubaki, with an annoyed look on her face, throws a small shuriken at Black Star without even turning around and it hits the assassin square centre in the forehead. "If you want to be an assassin, you have to learn to be quiet!" She said in an annoyed tone. Black Star fell off the wall. The girls started praising Tsubaki. "Oh wow!" "Thanks so much!" "You're awesome!" "You got rid of the peeking tom so calmly!" Tsubaki started trying to tell the other girls that it was nothing at all. Black Star's muffled shout came from the other side of the wall.
"I'm okay!"
Soul and Black Star run to each other in slow motion (sadly their voices weren't slowed down. It would have been hilarious if they were). "Black Star!" "Oh Soul!" "Black Star!" "Oh Soul!" "Black Star!" "Oh Soul!" The two hugged with the utmost bromance they could muster for the fangirls but they didn't stay embracing for too long until… BANG! Kid shot the two of them down with the excuse of:
"Oops, sorry, my fingers slipped."
~TECHNICAL DIFFICULTY RESOLVED! BACK TO THE STORY!~
~Several hours later
Spirit was in bed in his apartment, holding an ice pack to his throbbing head.
"Ow." He whined lowly. "Makaaaa! Why do you hate your papa so?!" he looked at the phone. Hughes and Roy had gone on their flight back to Amestris an hour or so earlier. He also looked at a photo that he got taken with Hughes before he had headed home himself with his hurting head. He and Maes were both grinning.
'Now that you think about it, Maes and I are a bit similar.' The Death Scythe realized. 'We both love our daughters so much. Ah, my wonderful Maka!~' Suddenly, a thought came to mind. After the incident with Maka, Roy explained his goal to become Fuhrer of the State and his promise that when he becomes Fuhrer, all female military officers will be required to wear tiny miniskirts. 'Hughes...' Spirit suddenly thought of something 'classified' and blood flowed from his nose like his nostrils were city flood gates.
'What the heck?! Where the hell did THAT thought come from?!'
ON THE FLIGHT BACK TO AMESTRIS
Hughes was staring out the window, watching the clouds pass by below him. Roy was sitting next to him, having a sip of Rumba Coffee (as he was recommended by a certain engineer from the DWMA Oceania branch).
'So Maka hates Spirit?' Maes thought. 'Man, poor guy. I should do something. I know!' suddenly he gained starry eyes.
Hours later, they touched down in Amestris, or more specifically, in the new Central Airport (it really amazed the two Amestrians how their country was starting to catch up in technology ever so slowly). Roy and Hughes got off the flight and were greeted by Hawkeye, Havoc, Fuery, Falman, Breda, Edward and Alphonse.
"Nice to see you're back. Colonel Mustang, Lieutenant Colonel Hughes." Hawkeye greeted, smiling at Roy. Roy was a little tinged with pink and greeted back "Yeah. We're back, Lieutenant."
The Colonel then smirked when he saw Edward, with Alphonse (still in the armour) standing next to his older brother.
"Nice to see you, Fullmetal." He looked at Ed. "Sorry, I nearly didn't see you there! You're just so little!"
"WHO ARE YOU CALLING A TINY LITTLE PERSON YOU COULD SQUASH LIKE AN ANT?!" Ed shouted in fury, trying to hit the Colonel, but was being held back by Al. "DON'T CALL ME SMALL! I'LL BREAK OFF YOUR FEET AND STICK 'EM ON YOUR HEAD!"
Hughes turned around and ran.
"Hughes?" Roy looked at his friend, "What are you doing?"
"Going to use the phone!" Hughes called as he ran off.
FINALLY! AFTER ALL THIS TIME, I FINALLY FINISHED IT! Sorry to all those I kept waiting! Please review with what you thought of the story, I would greatly appreciate it! And now since I finished this, I can also post chapter 1 of my Soul Eater/Ouran High School Host Club Xover called 'Secret of the New Host!' I'm looking forward to publishing it! I've had the entire first chapter of 'Secret of the New Host' written for over a month now and I've been waiting to finish some other stories so I wouldn't be putting too much pressure on writing my stories. So I may even get the chapter for 'Secret of the New Host' up in an hour or two! Chapters of my other fanfics will be coming soon too! Along with TWO FMA oneshots and the first chapter of my Soul Eater/Shinryaku! Ika Musume (Squid Girl) Xover which I can now announce is called 'Death the Squid' (which will be published only after the FMA oneshots are posted). I am also now working on a collaborated Soul Eater fanfic with NorthernMage called 'Too Twisted to be Home'. I wrote the first chapter of it and NorthernMage is currently writing chapter 2, but NorthernMage posted the story under her account, so you'll have to check her out to find the story 'Too Twisted to be Home'. I put a link to that collab fanfic on my profile.
I'm also sorry if this chapter isn't as humorous as the first one. I was starting to run out if ideas for jokes, but I DID manage to fit a little joke in at the end of Spirit's part (when he was in bed). Can you guess what 'dirty thought' Spirit was thinking about? Also, the ending may seem like it leaves a plot hole like 'What does Hughes want to do with the phone?', but the reason I've got that ending is because I am making a oneshot sequel to this later on! Maybe published along with the first chapter of 'Death the Squid', I'm not sure.
Anyways, Review and Favourite (this twoshot is complete, so following it after this chapter was posted is pretty silly. Unless you want to follow me as the author, which I'm not exactly sure, but may or may not alert you when I post a new story, which will include the 'Baby Photos' sequel).
This is Pokelolmc… OUT! *Poof*