Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or any of its characters. However, since Rowling discarded my favourite characters I picked them up and took them into my care to give them the love and attention they deserve...and occasionally give them reason to need that love and attention no matter how much they deserve it without needing a reason.
Summary: Unable to sleep, Harry joins Sirius and Remus in the kitchen and learns more about them and his own past; there is baking involved.
Warnings: Strong bromance, can't stomach boys being extremely close without it being sexual, then this is not the story for you and you should hit the return button.
Also warnings for Sirius' abusive childhood being discussed.
Contains some Molly and Dumbledore bashing.
This story is part of a series called A Bond of Family. If you are interested in reading the entire series, then the chronological order can be found on my profile. Can mostly be read on its own.
Special thanks to Kitty for beta-ing this story for me repeatedly and giving me endless support and inspiration for this series. Thank you for your endless patience with my grammar and for all the lessons you've taught me and are still trying to stamp into my brain.
Some errors removed and small changes made June 2021.
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Sirius Black had always had the reputation of being completely unpredictable.
Whenever someone thought they had figured the handsome boy out, he would do something to throw them off guard completely again, and usually quite unconsciously, too.
He had a way to surprise even those who knew him for years with ingenious pranks and his unorthodox manner of duelling made many a foe underestimate his abilities until it was too late.
Sirius was many different things in the eyes of just as many different people, but the one thing both allies and enemies always agreed on without a doubt was that he was anything but predictable.
Twelve years in Azkaban had robbed him of many things, his unpredictability however was not one of them; so Remus would not be able to say why he was so surprised to enter the kitchen in the middle of the night to find his old friend baking, but he was.
The dark haired male's sleeves were pushed up to above his elbows, revealing thin, pale scarred arms as he mixed something with his hands.
"Why are you baking?"
The bowl he had been working in almost slipped from the counter as he startled heavily and only his ingrained quick reflexes prevented it from crashing to the ground.
"Remus! Don't sneak up on me!"
Wincing Remus apologised; knowing better than to move quietly around his unexpecting friend as even after two years being away from that horrible prison, the younger man was still easily startled.
"Sorry, I couldn't sleep and was coming down for a drink."
"It's all right, just don't do it again," looking down at his bowl, Sirius returned to his mixing.
"You do realise using magic would make this go a lot quicker, right? Or just transfiguring a mixer would have the same effect."
"I don't like the sound of a mixer and I'm not in a hurry. I don't expect Harry to show up for another hour or so and the twins have already returned to bed."
There was something content in Sirius' voice that made Remus realise the other truly enjoyed the company of the teenage boys and actually looked forward to seeing them each evening, though he pushed his revelation out of his mind in favour of a more pressing question, "You are baking for Harry?"
"Who else would I be baking for in the middle of the night?"
"Right. I'm just surprised to see you baking at all, you haven't done so in years," the moment the words left his mouth he winced; cursing his thoughtless mind as it was all too clear why the other hadn't done so. "Sorry."
An awkward silence fell between then as Sirius nodded; attacking the substance in the bowl a bit more determined and Remus watched him in silence for a long moment until it became unbearable and he untied his tongue. "So what is the occasion for which you are baking?"
"It's his fifteenth birthday tomorrow."
Blinking at the words, Remus looked down at the bowl to see his old friend was making chocolate cake. "Won't Molly want to make a cake for him tomorrow?"
"Why should I care about what she might want to do?" The annoyance in Sirius' voice was clear to hear and Remus shifted his weight, a little unsure of what to say, so ended up watching in silence once more as Sirius checked the texture of the mix before spreading it out onto a form and sliding it into the oven.
He paused in closing the oven door; clearly picking up on the faint footsteps a floor or two above them as someone entered the bathroom, before letting the oven door slide shut and glancing at his pocket watch with a frown before retrieving two pans.
"Chocolate or tea?"
"Chocolate of course. As if I'd ever choose differently with you making it," a smile crossed Remus' lips for the first time since he had entered the kitchen as he watched Sirius pour milk into one pan and another with water to place both on the stove before retrieving a bar of chocolate to dump into a small bowl, placing it onto the pan with water and stirring in it slowly.
Watching him work for a moment longer, Remus realised his friend wasn't going to be the one to break the silence and sighed. "I know you have no reason to care, but why exactly are you inviting yet another argument if you know Molly will want to make Harry a cake?"
"I wasn't aware I had to be asking her permission if I wish to make my godson a birthday cake in my own hellish house or even had to explain myself."
There was little Remus could say to argue with that, because he knew Sirius was right; and although he was sure Molly wouldn't agree or listen to his reasoning at all, it was more than within his right to make one if that was his wish.
And if he was completely honest with himself then he would have to admit it would be well worth sitting through another one of Molly's screaming sessions to have a taste of Sirius' cake.
For more than his unpredictability, his talent for baking was legendary among those who knew him well, and often enough Remus had enjoyed his friend's skills throughout their teenage years.
Mostly Sirius would surprise him after a full moon; somehow having discovered the healing power of chocolate for his tormented body and providing it in the form of a sugary sweet and the young Pure-Blood's unexpected talent for baking and later cooking was something all the Marauders had eagerly made use of.
It had been one of Remus' favourite pastimes to watch Sirius bake; learning from Tiffy and the other House-elves throughout the years and he always got to clear out the used bowl after his friend was done with it.
"Are you going to clean it out or should I just wash it off?"
Being pulled out of his thoughts to see his old friend hold out the empty bowl to him, he couldn't help but smile as Sirius had unknowingly followed his trail of thoughts and snatched it out of his hands to swipe some mixture onto his finger.
"For a moment there, I thought you were sick," haunted grey eyes watched him for a moment before they returned their attention to the melted chocolate he was stirring in.
"I was lost in thought," Remus admitted.
"I noticed, I used to have to defend the bowl from you and James' eager fingers," his gaze found his momentarily. "What were you thinking about?"
Taking a moment to savour the last bit of texture left, Remus moved to the sink to wash the bowl off himself. "I was thinking of how the Prewetts and some others used to almost beg on their knees to bribe you into making something for them."
"Who is begging on their knees?" Harry's familiar voice made Remus spin around to see the boy enter the kitchen; rubbing his eyes underneath his glasses.
"You are up early," ignoring the question, Sirius placed three mugs onto the table after he had filled them with hot chocolate and dumped the used pans in the dish water to soak.
"Ron's snoring was driving me insane," smiling in thanks, Harry folded his fingers around the hot cup. "Thanks."
"Between Ron's snoring and your own weird dreams, you hardly get any sleep at all," Sirius frowned as he took a seat across of Harry at the kitchen table and Remus slid into the seat beside him as the third cup told him he was not unwelcome.
"I really don't see any solution to that, Siri," Harry yawned.
"Why don't you crash in my room? At least that way you would get some sleep," Sirius offered; making Harry look up to him.
"I wouldn't want to intrude."
"You wouldn't. And if it makes you uncomfortable to have me in the room with you, I'll just crash with Remus."
"Then where would he sleep?"
"Don't worry, I'm more than used to his company in my bed," Remus tried to reassure him; flushing as Harry promptly choked on his chocolate and he realised just how his words could be taken. "I didn't….I mean..."
Stumbling over his words in his haste to try and explain, he flushed even worse as Sirius just laughed unhelpfully until he took pity on him.
"We didn't share a bed for the reason you are thinking of," he informed Harry. "There is a lot of comfort to have someone you trust close to you after nightmares and I had my fair share of them."
Harry nodded, more than familiar with the terror and misery he always felt upon waking from one or the lost feeling after his odder dreams, and it was part of the reason he was always relieved to find Sirius in the kitchen with hot chocolate in the after-effects of either.
"Did..." trailing off, Harry wasn't sure if he actually wanted to know the answer to the question on his mind, but Sirius seemed to read his mind.
"Only occasionally, usually whenever I'd gotten hurt, but other than that it was rare. He was always there for me when I woke up from one, though."
"Half way into our fifth year you had so many nightmares that he just gave up all together on sleeping separate for the longest of times and James would just crawl beside you when we'd go to sleep."
"You make it sound like you didn't do the same or didn't just join us both when really bad ones hit," smiling ruefully, Sirius looked down at his cup. "Their close contact always helped a lot in settling me."
"Only you and dad did?"
"I don't think Peter ever even discovered I had nightmares; though he knew we often shared a bed."
"I'm not so sure, if we didn't wake him up before breakfast, he would've slept the entire day. I don't think he ever realised just how often you guys slept together," Remus' tone was angry even as Sirius shrugged and Harry decided a diversion was in order before either man could get overcome with emotion.
"Did it truly help, sleeping in the same bed?"
"It is amazing how much comfort there is to be found in waking up in the arms of someone who makes you feel safe," Sirius said. "Especially when you wake up terrified or lost."
"Why did you have so many nightmares?" He wondered just what might have scared his godfather so much as a teenager that hadn't had the same effect on his own father.
"You really need to ask after having seen what kind of people…." Remus cut himself off as Sirius shot him a glare and his godfather reached out to squeeze his hand over the table as Harry looked down ashamed to have even asked.
"You are allowed to ask questions, if there is one I wish not to answer then I will simply say so," he took a deep breath. "My relatives were horrible; stuck up, sadistic and very cruel. They were never happy with anything I did and even as a toddler I was already a disappointment in the eyes of most of them. And where some parents believed in raising their children happily despite the different views, my relatives weren't like that," the haunted look in his eyes seemed to increase as he looked down at his empty cup and he hesitated for a long moment before continuing.
"Walburga and Orion believed that if a child did not act accordingly to their beliefs, the hard way was the best way. Or in their case...inflicting pain to be forced into submission was their preferred method to handle disobedience."
It seemed difficult for Sirius to speak about the subject even as Harry's heart plummeted at the implications and he tightened his hold on his godfather's hand. He had known Sirius had never seen eye to eye with his relatives and had run away to the Potters; and although he had wondered, he had never worked up the courage to ask what had happened. But even in his deepest and darkest thoughts, he had never imagined what he was hearing now. "They beat you?"
"They never laid a hand on me, despising anything remotely Muggle-like," something dark crossed over Remus' features at this friend's words and he spat out.
"They preferred dark spells to get their point across instead."
"They tortured you?" The almost nonchalant shrug he received in return nearly overwhelmed Harry with anger and revolt; realising just what kind of childhood Sirius must have had.
"We found out in our third year and your father had a whole fit; tried to do everything he could to try and get him out of there," Remus revealed.
"Then why didn't he?" He knew his father hadn't managed or Sirius wouldn't have had to run away and it angered him to think his father had not helped his friend when it was clearly needed.
"It's not that easy, pup. The Blacks belonged to the Noble and Most Ancient of Houses; one of the most powerful and darkest families ever existing and their influence in the Wizarding world widespread. Many of the other houses married into the House of Black, giving them even more political influence and power," Sirius shifted and Harry's eyes fell onto the scars on his godfather's wrists, wondering if the Blacks had inflicted the shackle like wounds there, but couldn't bear to ask as he knew it would mean Sirius would withdraw from him.
"So? Dad came from a powerful house, too, didn't he?"
"It doesn't quite work that way as although the House of Potter was a Noble and Ancient one; they were mostly viewed as blood traitors by most of the darker Pure-Blood society since they were Muggle-friendly. It would have been political suicide if they had interfered in the personal affairs of the House of Black."
It was clear Sirius picked up on his lack of understanding as he elaborated.
"If the Potters had tried to take me from the Blacks without Arcturus' permission and without clear evidence, they would have risked both their seat and what influence they had. Without both, the fragile balance between the Houses would have tipped over to the dark families supporting Voldemort, giving him free reign."
Squeezing his hand in an attempt to comfort him, Sirius smiled faintly. "They tried everything within their limited power to make things easier for me. Your father invited me over for every holiday I couldn't stay at Hogwarts; in ways that the Blacks couldn't refuse or lose face. It forced them to let me go at least a few weeks every year and your grandparents also sent letters and little gifts throughout the school year to let me know I was in their thoughts."
"Didn't Dad do anything?" Although it was comforting to know his family hadn't just left his godfather to rot, it still didn't sit well with him to know they had left him in such a toxic house.
"James did everything he could for me in any way possible. He learned as much healing spells as he could so that he could help me heal any wounds I'd received after the holidays, covered for me during the first weeks as I was recovering and always tried to take care of me."
"Not to mention he was extremely overprotective of you," Remus choked out a laugh. "I can't even remember the amount of times he hexed us for making too much noise when you were finally sleeping."
"But you still ran away before turning seventeen," Harry pointed out. "Why?"
"They went too far when I was fifteen. I had gotten a lot more powerful over the years; learning as much magic as I could and Christmas Eve of our fifth year, we clashed. The result wasn't pretty but I managed to get away and ran to James. It was then that your grandparents could present the evidence needed to get my grandfather to get me away from there for good. Your dad blood adopted me and his parents took me in as one of their own. Your family has been one of the best things to have ever happened to me."
A lump formed in Harry's throat at the intensive warmth displayed in those haunted grey eyes; the love the man felt for the Potter family radiating off of him in waves that made Harry unable not to smile.
"Yeah?...Then what's the best thing that ever happened to you?"
"Your birth," the genuine happiness of his godfather's features made him blush and the older man cleared his throat.
"But we got off track; would you like to try sleeping in my room?" He clearly misinterpreted his blush as discomfort and tried to change the subject so Harry ducked his head with a nod.
"Good, then I will grab my toothbrush before you go back to..."
"You don't have to crash with Remus," flushing even more as Remus gave him an amused look, Harry fought to ignore him. "I uh...I don't mind you being in the bed with me."
"If you are sure, though I will sleep as Padfoot so that you'll be more comfortable," Sirius decided.
"You really don't have to," Harry tried to reassure him, but Sirius waved off his concern and he smiled. "Thank you."
"Anytime, pup."
"Why do you do that?" Harry found himself asking. "I mean, I don't mind and I mean that I really don't mind, but I have to admit that I am curious why you call me pup on occasion. Is it because of Padfoot?"
"I...I do?" Surprised, Sirius turned to Remus. "I call him pup?"
"You have done so since he was a baby," Remus shrugged. "I'm so used to it that I don't even notice any more."
"I hadn't realised, though you might be right in that Padfoot has to do with it," Sirius admitted. "The moment we realised your mum was pregnant, you were family to me. James has always been my brother even before the adoption and once your parents became civil I began to see your mum as my sister."
He hesitated, as if unsure of how to explain properly what he wanted to say without being taken the wrong way. "From the moment I first heard your heartbeat, I knew you were a part of me and the moment I held you as you took your first breaths, I knew you were mine. Sure, you were James' and Lily's baby, but I have always loved you as if you were my own and your parents actually always encouraged it. It's very likely that because of Padfoot, that was translated into you being my pup."
The obvious love and devotion in those warm grey eyes made Harry's heart skip a beat as he knew from the bottom of his heart that Sirius truly loved him unconditionally, always had and that realisation filled him with more happiness than he could ever describe.
"You were there when I was born?" He tried to keep his emotions in check, but if anything his godfather's eyes lit up even more as they shone.
"I was actually the one who brought you into the world. Because of the dangers of the war, your mum couldn't go to St Mungo for the birth and the plan was for your grandmother to be the one to deliver you. But when her waters broke, I was actually the only one there as your father was on a mission," Sirius laughed. "I had only just placed you in your mother's arms when he returned."
Sirius' smile grew as he was pulled into the memory. "He was just standing there, looking absolutely gobsmacked as he saw you and that smile as I placed you into his arms was the most beautiful smile I'd ever seen on him; it was even more radiant than the one he had when your mum first asked him out."
"That..." awe was the only thing Harry could feel upon hearing the story of his birth; warmth rushing through him to know he had been so wanted and loved by his father. "So it was just you and Mum?"
"And me," Remus coughed self-concious. "The moment Lily went into labour I was utterly useless and mostly hid in the kitchen as she was spending the time between her screams divided between cursing him out and apologising for it and I was utterly terrified."
"You were terrified? What about me?" laughing, Sirius took a sip of his hot chocolate. "It was me she was calling things I'd never even heard of and it wasn't even my fault she was pregnant! But when you gave that first wail, she became the proudest and happiest woman in the world and neither of them could stop staring at you."
"Neither could you," Remus accused. "When James arrived I deemed it safe to return so I was present when you were placed back into Sirius' arms; being told that his godfather should be the first to officially hold him after them. He was still kneeling in the middle of Merlin knows what substances; but you'd have thought it was sparkles he was covered in with how he cradled you in his arms and stared down at you as if you were the single most beautiful thing he had ever seen."
"Well, he was...is," there was not the least bit of embarrassment in Sirius' eyes as he was clearly remembering the event in detail and Harry found himself smiling as he couldn't possibly be embarrassed by such an obvious display of love.
It was weird; Harry had always believed male adults did not show emotions other than anger; Snape and Uncle Vernon were fine examples of that, but interacting with his godfather and Remus taught him that wasn't true.
While Remus was more reserved around him, neither were afraid to show what they were feeling and Sirius especially was completely open to Harry and it comforted him in ways he couldn't describe to see the open love and affection displayed in those warm grey eyes.
But the moment was broken by a bell going off softly and Sirius quickly moved from the table to pull a cake out of the oven.
"That smells good," sniffing the air appreciatively, Harry watched his godfather place the cake on the table. "I didn't know you could bake?"
"He is brilliant at baking; and quite a good cook, too," Remus grinned. "When he was staying with your parents and you, they always tried to make him cook."
"Like you were any better," tapping the cake with his wand to cool it, Sirius began to spread icing over it.
"Yeah well, can you blame me? You are a brilliant cook and if we were home at the same time, I always had you make it."
"You lived together?"
"Yes, it was hard to find a place after graduation as people didn't easily rent out to werewolves; registered or not. Sirius had inherited some properties a while before and invited me to stay with him. I kept swearing that I would find a place of my own soon, but never really did. Not that it mattered as he hardly ever came home again after you were born," laughing at Harry's confusion, Remus elaborated.
"You were an absolute terror as you got a little older and would refuse to fall asleep unless Sirius was there and although your parents tried every trick in the book, you would be calmest if he was there. He tried to leave once you had fallen asleep; but if you woke and he wasn't there when he had been before, you would start crying and not stop until your parents would beg Sirius to return."
"That is if you went to sleep at all, as you knew I might leave once you did," Sirius laughed. "I can't even remember how often I spent the night either rocking you or driving through the streets. Or even just flying while you were asleep in my arms, just to keep you calm."
"How did Mum and Dad handle me if you were unavailable?" Harry was torn between being mortified at being such a disastrous toddler and simple curiosity as Sirius obviously hadn't minded.
"We had our ways to remain in contact," came the cryptic answer before Sirius grinned. "I almost blew a mission when you called me on your first birthday; I wasn't supposed to come due to being on a mission, but when you called I couldn't bring myself not to go. You kept calling me to follow you while you flew on your first toy broom."
"James was glad for the moment of respite, though. He told me he had spent hours chasing after you and was happy for Sirius to do the same for the gift he was responsible for in the first place," laughing, Remus brushed his hair out of his face. "Which was an absurd gift anyway as you hated brooms!"
"Just because I disliked brooms didn't mean I'd deny him the chance to fly on one," shrugging, Sirius turned back to Harry. "I should have the photo of it in my room; your mum wrote to me about it in a letter, having just send it off by owl when I unexpectedly arrived."
"How? You ran away when you were fifteen, wouldn't that be elsewhere?"
"I actually had that photo on me when I was arrested so it was returned to me alongside my wand so it's here alongside that letter. Everything else I found precious I kept in my vault; including copies of all my photos. It was a precaution in case Death Eaters attacked. Your family vault should have loads of personal items of your parents in it as well. I wish I could take you there immediately, but seeing the situation as it is, I am afraid it will have to wait until you are seventeen."
"So...there will be photos of my parents in there?"
"Yes, from their early childhood until their last update before everything went to hell. And loads of personal items too, diaries and stuff like that. Your mum kept a diary while she was pregnant with you and that should be there, too," Sirius confirmed.
"I can't wait to see it! Though I prefer to get your freedom before I turn seventeen," Harry asked happily.
"Either way they'll be there. Your trust vault will disappear when you become an adult and I'm supposed to give you your family vault key then."
"You have my key?"
"One of them. Your grandfather gave me access when your dad adopted me so that I could always take money should I want to buy something. I never did outside of school supplies I couldn't afford myself, but I do have the key," Sirius said. "After you were born and we set up your trust vault, James made sure I had a copy of your key as your godfather."
"Then how did Dumbledore come to be in possession of my trust vault key if he was never my guardian?"
"He must have taken it from my possessions as it wasn't among the possessions returned to me. I never made a fuss over it as I knew you had it or you wouldn't have been able to get school supplies. But technically the key should've gone to one of the people on my list after I was thrown in jail."
"People on your list?"
"Your parents had only named me as your guardian in case something happened, but I had named people as well; in case something might happen to me as well. Dumbledore had no right to put you with the Dursleys as not all those on my list were unavailable and he really is lucky I can't have him arrested for breaking a Will or I would."
"Who did you name to look after me if something happened to you?" Harry asked, curious to the people Sirius would have trusted enough to look after him.
"My first choice would've been Alice and Frank Longbottom since they had a kid your age. Then my friends Pandora and Fabian. Minerva McGonagall and Remus were my fourth choices."
Harry didn't know who all of those people were, though the name Longbottom made him think of Neville and he wondered what had happened to the others before registering one of the names properly.
"Professor McGonagall? Seriously?" He was horrified to see his godfather nod. "Why?"
"She was a close friend of your grandparents, so we often saw her outside of school and underneath that strictness, she was actually very kind. She is one of the few people left who I trust without question."
"When you had just escaped, I snuck into Hogsmeade and overheard her talking with some others about you. She couldn't believe you had done what they said you did. Rosmerta too," he remembered.
Sirius frowned. "Rosmerta? I haven't seen her in ages, you hated her guts."
"I did?"
"Oh you did. You were absolutely smitten with your Siri, made many a shop worker go all googly eyed on you both as you'd glare really adorably at anyone so much as daring to smile at him. Rosmerta had the habit of flirting with every handsome young man no matter their age and both your dad and Sirius qualified. You would not stop glaring at her the few times we came across her on our way to The Hog's Head," Remus laughed.
"You didn't care the least bit that she flirted with your dad, but the moment she turned to Sirius, you would puff up your cheeks and hold onto him tightly, babbling 'Siri my!" It was so adorable."
"I remember that," Sirius chuckled. "I never quite realised just what set you off as Fab always flirted with me, too and you never reacted that way to him."
"That was Fab, he was about as dangerous as a flobberworm when it came to your safety," Remus waved him off. "And it's not like anyone had anything left to say but swoon at your standard response anyway."
"It was not that bad!"
"It absolutely was, the sheer levels of adorableness were in full overload any time it happened."
"What did he say in return, then?" Looking between the two arguing men, Harry was thrilled to see a small flush cross his godfather's lips at the huge grin crossing Remus'.
"Yours," laughing again, Remus continued. "No one was allowed to come near him outside of a select few. Not even Moody or Dumbledore were allowed to come within touching range or you would use magic to drive them back and you actually quite liked Moody."
"Even Peter?"
"Especially Peter. You would get hysterical if he came too close to Sirius or you, like you knew he was bad news and wouldn't stop screaming. Even threw up a defensive shield the few times he tried to touch Sirius."
"A defensive shield?" Harry asked confused.
"We eh….we spent months teaching you a small Protego charm, so that if something happened you would be able to at least try to protect yourself. Only you mostly used it to keep the people you disliked away from me."
"You mean that he was utterly possessive of you and that only got worse after the incident."
"What incident?" He knew he should probably feel mortified the more he learned about what a terror he'd been, but instead it only made him more curious and in awe of his family for trying to teach him magic like that to protect him from harm regardless of how young he'd been.
But at the same time that he was curious about said incident Remus referred to, he couldn't help but notice how Sirius suddenly withdrew as if pained by Remus' words as the other man explained.
"You were a little over a year old and Sirius was babysitting you when Death Eaters attacked our apartment. It terrified me when I came home that evening to see the Dark Mark above the building with no sign of either of you. There were clear signs of a struggle and our wards had been torn apart," Remus shuddered as he clearly remembered the sight as if it had happened that very evening.
"James and Sirius had it arranged that if there was ever trouble, they would go to Potter Manor, where your grandparents lived, as a safe haven. But by the time the Order arrived there your grandparents were already dead and Sirius had been tortured by Death Eaters for hours."
And that explained perfectly why Sirius' mood had shifted so abruptly and Harry couldn't help but reach out to squeeze his godfather's hand tightly.
"We managed to drive them away quickly enough, but there was no sign of you anywhere and Sirius wasn't coherent enough to say more than that you were in a safe location before being hurried to St Mungo's. Your parents were beside themselves with fear until James realised what he had meant and led us to the hallway, where your grandfather had installed a hidden room just for him. A place he could go to if he ever got scared and only a Potter could enter, they called it their safe location. Upon entering you were indeed there, scared and hungry but completely unharmed and after that you refused to let Sirius out of your sight for weeks, afraid he would disappear again."
"You actually weren't the only one to feel that way as neither of your parents let me stay anywhere but your home while I recovered from my injuries. We did have loads of fun together, though," a faint smile crossed over Sirius' features at the memories and Harry returned it before frowning.
"You almost died to protect me, didn't you?"
"I would have done anything to keep you and your family safe, pup. If that meant giving up my life then I would've done so in a heartbeat," came the honest reply.
"I know, but you openly tried to protect me despite what they did to you," and it really couldn't have been pretty if he'd been tortured for hours. "How could anyone believe you would have ever betrayed my family when you'd done that?"
"I don't know, I thought everyone knew how much I loved your family and that I would've rather died than betray any of you."
"It were dark times and no one was entirely sure who they could and couldn't trust. Looking back I still wonder how I could have ever believed in your guilt despite knowing how you felt about them."
"Then why did you?" Harry asked, wanting to know what had made Remus doubt one of his closest friends so easily.
"As time passed by Sirius got fairly distant from me while we used to be very close and he would spent a lot of time away from home without telling me where he went, something I now realise had to do with secret missions for the Order. Dumbledore ordered us not to speak to anyone about what we did, not even to each other so that the spy couldn't get any information. We didn't realise that the same precaution was also what made us wary of each other," he cleared his throat and glanced at Sirius.
"I also suspect Peter played a big part in it. Little things he said about you that didn't add up and caused me to question you, despite knowing better. Like he'd seen you at a location where known Death Eaters had been around the same time. I didn't know you were on missions during those times and believed the worst, especially with the way you acted after Tiffy and Fa….," cutting himself off as Sirius tensed, Remus swallowed thickly and Harry wondered what he'd been about to say but didn't dare ask as it was clearly a sore point. "And last of all, I am very much ashamed to say I started to see Sirius as a Black and not as the boy I'd always known and trusted."
There were tears in Remus' eyes as he looked up to Sirius properly. "I truly am sorry for ever doubting you, despite the fact that I should have known better."
Sighing, Sirius nodded. "We were both at fault. You were so hell-bent on following the rules that I simply never bothered telling you where I was going any more while I shared everything with at least James," he paused, hesitating but Remus interrupted before he could continue.
"And the fact that I am a werewolf and the Death Eaters were recruiting them didn't help either."
"No, I'd never have thought you to be a spy because of that. If anything that would have kept you from turning as you knew what the Slytherins thought of werewolves and in their eyes other lesser creatures. You fought me on every little thing I ever tried to do for you, too much darn pride for your own good. Moony would never be the reason you would've turned traitor."
It was clear Remus had no expected that answer at all as he stared at Sirius in shock.
"We were a bunch of fools," he finally whispered as he looked down, missing the pained look in Sirius' eyes before it smoothed over and although Harry really wanted to ask what that had been about, he pushed his questions down as it didn't seem like his godfather had meant for him to see it.
"We paid dearly for our actions."
There was silence for a few moments as Sirius put the finishing touches to the cake he'd been absent-mindedly icing and decorating before he rose to collect something from a drawer.
"But enough small and depressing talks, close your eyes pup," he ordered and Harry did as he was told, hearing rustling as the two men did something before the tunes of the birthday song sounded as the two men sung and surprised Harry opened his eyes to find candles burning on the cake.
"The cake was meant for me?" He asked awed.
"Of course, it's two minutes past midnight and I don't know who else is turning fifteen today," Sirius had risen to his feet to wrap him in a hug, dropping a kiss into his hair. "Happy birthday Harry. Now blow out your candles and make a wish."
Returning the hug, Harry swallowed thickly as he looked at the cake. "You didn't have to go through so much trouble."
"I wanted to and I'm aware I really don't know you as well as I would like to yet, but you used to love this specific cake when you were little and since you mentioned still loving chocolate, I figured why not."
"Thank you...both of you," wiping away a few stray tears, Harry examined the cake before him; chuckling at the tiny brooms and snitches decorating the cake.
"I did..."
"We were delighted to make it for you, now make that wish," Sirius spoke over whatever Remus was trying to say, eagerly beginning to hum the tune of the birthday song again and Remus quickly joined him.
Grinning at them, Harry took a deep breath before blowing the candles out….only to find they didn't go out at all and both men snickered as he attempted to blow them out twice more.
"Very funny, you two," mock glaring, Harry couldn't help but shake his head fondly at the immature prank; secretly loving it.
"Sorry, couldn't resist," Sirius grinned unashamed as he wandlessly gestured over the candles. "Don't forget to make a wish."
Nodding, Harry closed his eyes and wished with all his heart for his godfather to be a free man so they could openly go anywhere they wanted to without fear before blowing at the candles, this time putting them out immediately and laughed as Sirius cheered.
"How about you share a piece with us, birthday boy?" Remus handed over a knife as Sirius retrieved three plates and Harry carefully cut a small piece onto each plate before picking up his fork.
"Mrs Weasley is going to have a nervous breakdown when she learns we are eating cake after midnight," he noted amused.
"Tough luck for her then that this is our house and our rules apply, isn't it?"
Our house.
Harry couldn't help but beam at Sirius' casual words even as he worried for the screaming sure to happen when Mrs. Weasley found the cake.
"You know she will be mad at you tomorrow, right?" He asked just to be sure Sirius knew what was awaiting him. Mrs. Weasley's temper was widely known in most of the Wizarding world, and although that temper had never been directed at him, he knew she often directed it at Sirius.
"When isn't she?" Remus asked and Sirius nodded, not looking the least bit bothered.
"She thinks I'm irresponsible, shouldn't be trusted and a danger to your safety because I don't believe wrapping you in cotton wool and keeping you out of the loop is the way to go."
"Aren't you the least bit afraid of her temper? Almost everyone is."
Remus snorted loudly and Sirius' only answer was a small smile that looked a tiny bit on the insane side if Harry was completely honest.
"What?"
"You're talking about the guy who was given a lecture by McGonagall on an almost daily basis, which often started with her screaming his name throughout the Great Hall, along with your father's of course, before she dragged them off to her office to lecture them."
"That's unfair, it was only twice a month or so that she did that," Sirius protested.
"Still happened often enough," Remus grinned. "But I think the main reason Molly makes absolutely no impression on you is because of what Walburga did in our fifth year."
His expression soured as he grimaced and Sirius winced. "I only had the displease of meeting her up close and personal once when that hag showed up at Hogwarts after the Christmas holidays of fifth year. She caught us by surprise and cornered Sirius in the Great Hall, screaming his ears off about what a disgrace he was and how much of a blood traitor and that the family would forever be disgraced by his actions."
A grin slowly spread over Remus' lips. "And your godfather just stood there before he silenced her when she began to insult the Potters and he pretty much told her she was an old disgusting hag not worth his attention. And that if she wanted to open that big mouth of hers then she should go find her son to yell at because he was not interested in the words of a creature he would be ashamed to be associated with. Then to add insult to injury he spelled her to eat soap because any mouth uttering words like Mudblood and blood traitor could use a bit of a mouth cleaning in his opinion and who knew, it might even clean some of the filth and stench away from her ugly inbred mug. Turned his back on her after that and almost happily skipped away to leave her standing there, surrounded by half the school."
"How do you even remember all that?" Sirius asked incredulous even as Harry could only stare in utter shock at Remus' obvious delight.
"It was a hard to forget experience."
"You scare me sometimes," shooting him a dubious look, Sirius turned back to Harry. "But that's indeed a good reason why Molly fails to impress me."
"You...said all that to her face in front of a full Great Hall?"
"Apparently, I don't remember it too clearly any more but if she didn't have the decency to yell at me in privacy then I probably didn't see why I should give her that luxury."
"You are insane!"
"You know, I've been told that by a variety of people over the years," Sirius told him dryly and Remus chuckled even as Harry was pretty sure he resembled a goldfish as he stared at them.
"Absolutely mad. It was just a shame that he is also so utterly brilliant and clever to combine with that madness. Often us Marauders had to fear for our own sanity if he got an idea he wished to follow."
"Such as?"
"Learning to drive a bike, breaking into Filch's office to paint everything pink, teaching us to drive a car, and stealing Dumbledore's candy."
"You stole Dumbledore's candy?"
"You make it sound like I was the one coming up with that all when James and you were just as bad," Sirius grumbled. "And it really wasn't all that hard as the password to his office has always been based upon some type of candy so it was just a matter of guessing the right one and trying to enter and leave undetected by the Gargoyles."
"Fawkes actually helped me escape once when Dumbledore unexpectedly returned early from a diversion James and Remus had set up elsewhere in the castle to lure him out. Grabbed me and in a flash I was back in Gryffindor Tower, the bag filled with his candy stock in my hands," Sirius grinned.
"We had loads of fun displaying small parts of that stock at various areas in the castle for him to find again. Of course we had to time it perfectly with the Marauder's Map so that we'd be sure Dumbledore was the one who'd find it and not someone else."
Remus snickered. "I was absolutely terrified when the Headmaster picked up his lemon drops and his beard and hair turned blue. Not to mention the colour rainbow they turned when he put a candy into his mouth after testing it with his wand for spells. Awestruck, but terrified he'd know we were responsible."
"He must have known but we were too smart to have him be able to pin it on us. He was fun to try and throw pranks at because he usually took it in his stride. Professor M was not amused whenever we decided to prank her and I remember she got especially mad once time when we charmed a bunch of fishes to swim around her head for a while one day."
"How did you ever survive long enough to become adults?" Harry asked awed at their nerves.
"We never played pranks that would actually hurt people. Changed them different colours, we made them sing opera style for a full day once after James' parents had taken Sirius to see one. Had the entire school talk in limericks or gave various students different body parts and stuff like that," Remus shrugged before he smiled.
"Once your godfather accidentally changed your dad into a bird. James had been annoying us by singing love songs for Lily on Valentine's Day all day. Sirius for some reason I can't remember eventually just snapped at him, telling him that if he wanted to sing so badly he should have become a bird and while he was still speaking James suddenly turned into one. It was quite hilarious and to this day I still don't know who was more shocked, James in his bird form or Sirius at having changed him."
"You hadn't meant to change him into one?" Harry asked surprised.
"No, I just had bad day and wasn't even holding a wand or thinking of a spell to use wandless magic and yet he was a bird. He was as perplexed as I was once we finally managed to change him back again, but did say he had a lot of fun sitting on my shoulder all day, twittering and singing in my ear," Sirius laughed.
"We never did figure out how I'd managed to do it as I really was too old for accidental magic, but James was absolutely sure it had been my magic that changed him," he shook his head fondly. "McGonagall tried to help us change him back but she couldn't undo what I'd done without knowing exactly how I'd done it. Professor Flitwick was eventually the one who suggested that I should think of James in his human form and that did the trick."
Trying to imagine his father as a bird, Harry couldn't help but laugh. "I bet you have a million stories like that."
"If I can access my Vault properly I could actually show you those memories. And maybe I can locate a Pensieve here somewhere, too."
"That would be great," Harry smiled happily.
"But that is for later; let's first eat this cake before turning in for some more sleep, shall we?" Remus suggested so they all took a bite of their cake and Harry's eyes widened as the taste reached his senses and he swallowed quickly.
"Wow! This is really good!" he exclaimed and Sirius smiled.
"Thanks, I'm glad you like it."
"I do! I thought I'd never find any cake that could beat Mrs. Weasley's but this is so much better than any cake she ever made."
Sirius flushed. "I'm not that good."
"You really are," Harry argued and Remus hummed in agreement. "You have to teach me how to make this!"
"If you'd like."
"Does that mean that I can play guinea pig?" The eagerness in Remus' voice made them both laugh and they ate the rest of their pieces in comfortable silence.
Once they were all done Sirius took their plates, cleaning the dishes up while Remus put the rest of the cake into the fridge.
"We will give you your birthday present tomorrow, for now you really need to get some more sleep or I'm certain we will all get some infamous Weasley temper thrown at us if we all fall asleep during your party," Remus smiled.
Sirius and Harry snickered as Sirius threw his arms around Harry from behind. "I will just hide behind Harry."
"Coward," Harry accused teasingly.
"Maybe, but if I don't occasionally hide behind you I might just end up strangling her. This is the safest for her," Sirius answered easily, snuggling against Harry.
Leaning back into the hug, Harry wasn't the least bit uncomfortable by his godfather's affection as the man absolutely showered him in it since the moment they'd reunited and although he wasn't very used to people touching him, he never minded it when Sirius did.
His godfather's presence made him feel safe and content and from the soft hum Sirius produced, he knew the man was happy to be holding him too, just being close to him.
Maybe it was partly because he had just learned just how deeply his godfather loved him or maybe it was because he loved the man just as deeply in return, but either way Harry felt completely content to be near the man as he yawned.
Taking his yawn as an indication it was time for bed, Sirius steered him towards the stairs and as his eyes opened again, Harry realised Remus had been watching them from a distance and only had a moment to realise he wasn't embarrassed to have been seen hugging his godfather when he was suddenly picked up.
"Sirius!" he called out as Sirius picked him up bridal style and Harry automatically flung his arms around his neck to get a grip.
"Oh, so you haven't fallen asleep on me after all," Sirius teased as he shifted him a bit higher in his arms and tickled his side.
"Put me down," Harry laughed as he squirmed away from Sirius' tickling fingers while Remus laughed at them.
"No. It won't do to have you fall down the stairs in your sleepy state," Sirius informed him cheerily as he began to walk up the many flights of stairs, his arms firmly around Harry as if he was going to fall if he loosened his grip slightly.
And although he should probably demand to be let down, Harry found himself simply holding onto his godfather and indulging the man in his clear desire to carry him up the stairs like a small infant. He was too tired all of a sudden to argue and truthfully he didn't really mind Sirius being openly affectionate and caring.
He figured that while he himself hadn't known much or any love in his childhood, Sirius' youth would have been only worse and he vaguely wondered if the occasional touch Remus and he himself shared with him were the only human touches he'd received since his escape.
His godfather always seemed like such a strong person, but he was also obviously deeply affectionate yet Harry didn't have a single memory of Sirius ever touching anyone beside the two of them and occasionally the twins whenever Mrs. Weasley wasn't present and he decided that he really should be more openly affectionate with Sirius, regardless of company.
After all, even if the others would laugh at them for it, should he really care what they thought?
People were always gossiping about him anyway, no matter what he did and it would be nice to be this close to Sirius all the time as his godfather was there for him every night when he woke up and couldn't return to sleep.
Now that he thought of it, Sirius was always in the kitchen when Harry stumbled in, no matter the time and in the aftermath of what he had learned about the man today, it wasn't that unimaginable to think the man was plagued by his own nightmares.
After all, if he'd had so many nightmares as a teenager already, it only stood to reason that those multiplied after twelve years in Azkaban so it really wouldn't only be for his benefit but also that of his godfather that he would like to be more openly affectionate; especially since Sirius himself had revealed just how much it helped to be close in the arms of a loved one.
He got pulled out of his tired thoughts by the feeling of being put down on a bed, Sirius' bed to be exact as there was a clear lack of snoring from the other side of the room and he realised his eyes had closed somewhere along the way.
He was about to open them again but decided they were simply too heavy when he felt Sirius loosely tuck him in and removing his glasses before a soft kiss was pressed to his forehead.
"I love you," was whispered and his heart fluttered happily, but before he could even think of trying to form a reply, Sirius' weight disappeared from the bed and he felt too content to want to fight his heavy eyes on the off chance this had all been a happy dream and he'd wake up on his bed beside Ron again.
In the distance he heard Sirius and Remus converse briefly before the door closed and his heart clenched at the thought of being alone as he really didn't want Sirius to leave.
But before the feeling could truly take hold enough for him to fight sleep properly, the sound of Sirius shifting into Padfoot reached his ears and the weight on the bed dipped a little as Padfoot hopped on.
A soft weight settled on Harry's lower legs as Padfoot curled on against him, clearly resting his head on his legs and the contact was comforting and warm so Harry let himself slide into sleep fully, surrounded by the warmth of his godfather's presence.