MER LOVELIES! How have you been? I trust everyone had a SAFE holiday! It was a big day for us Americans, haha. I had a blast with my friends. We had a big get together in my hometown, and I saw some people I haven't seen in over a year. It was super great! And not to mention we had a TON of fireworks. Lemme just rephrase that for a second so you know what I'm saying. We had a shit ton of fireworks. Shot them for two hours straight, actually. And this one douchespit kept throwing firecrackers at everyone. I'm too jumpy for that mess! DX But, personal fun aside, you're all here for an update, not to hear about all that! So let's move onto your love! More follows, more new reviewers, and more love than I can handle has earned you an early update! TRUE TO MY WORD, YO. luckycat222, right? Blue ring pops are the best! I'm glad you love my Pesterchums, haha. They're really fun to write! Kira-Lime Orijima, that would be a hell of a wedding. Is there anyone who doesn't love Chef Boyardee? He's like, the best. He's the fucking Mayor of the real world. lovemahBF, you make me so happy! :D Really, it means so much! *loves* NyaddieLove, I'm in Alabama, haha. Born and raised. I don't really have an accent unless I'm mad though. Then I go full redneck. My fourth was excellent! I hope yours was too! DimintheMoonlight, haha, John is a little slow on the uptake, but hopefully he'll catch on. Poor Dave. Thank you! 73245, ahhhh, thank you! You're so kind! KimmXx, hey, I love hearing from you, so feel free to drop by anytime! You don't even know how happy it made me, thank yoooouuuu! Chandinee Richards, ah! Oh, man, she's so hard to write too! Her and Dave are the hardest for me to write, believe it or not. So thank you for that one! OHMIGAHHH, it means so much! Rai Rai Blue, you're such a Karkat lover, hehe. Of course, it's hard not to love him. He's so hostile. Of course John gets pestered like Dave does! Silly, it'll be in this chapter. I'm so sorry you can't have fireworks where you are! Blowing shit up is the best. turntech1Godhead, AHHHHHHHH, you like my Dave?! THANK YOU! I try so hard on him it's almost not even funny. With all of this said, thank you all for the love! New reviews are the best! Now, on with the story!

Safe and Sound

(Capital Cities)

[I could lift you up. I could show you what you want to see and take you where you want to be. You could be my luck, even if the sky is falling down, I know that we'll be safe and sound. Safe and sound. I could fill your cup. You know my river won't evaporate this world we still appreciate. You could be my luck even in a hurricane of frowns, I know that we'll be safe and sound. Safe and sound, safe and sound. Safe and sound, safe and sound.]

You're John Egbert, and you're bored as hell. Being stuck at work while your best bro is visiting isn't exactly your idea of a good time. Not to mention Karkat has been relentless because he's still pissed off about Dave bargaining for you to be off tomorrow, so your night has pretty much gone to hell before it even started.

You're slow tonight, which isn't surprising, since it's almost always slow in the store. Not many people appreciate comic books the way they used to. It's easier to read them online, but for you, it's never been the same. You enjoy the feel of them in your hands, and the ability to dog ear the pages, even though you know you're not supposed to. You're passionate about them, and you enjoy being surrounded by them, so you put up with all the shit your boss throws at you, because even Karkat Vantas can't destroy the serenity this place brings you. Still, tonight, you wish you were home with Dave. You might sneak and pester him later, but for now, you don't want to wake him up. He was pretty jetlagged.

You and Gamzee are behind the counter right now. Karkat is in the office. He goes in there sometimes to count the money from the register earlier, or just to yell at inanimate objects since yelling at Gamzee doesn't seem to accomplish much. You aren't exactly sure what he does when he's not pissed off. You've never seen him calm.

"I love when things are like this," Gamzee says suddenly. You look up at him.

"Like what?"

"All calm and shit. Not a motherfuckin' sound."

"Oh, yeah, I guess. I wish we'd do something though. I'm pretty bored," you sigh, leaning against the counter.

"Oh, right, you got what's his face at home. Dave, right? He your boyfriend?"

"What? No! He's my best friend! Gamzee, oh my god, I can't believe you!"

"No need to get all red, motherfucker. It was a question, not an insult."

Your heart is beating really fast, but you will it to calm down. Gamzee may be a pretty zoned out pothead, but he's oddly intuitive when it comes to certain things. You don't want him getting the wrong impression about you and Dave's relationship. If he does, you'll never hear the end of it. Your phone vibrates against your leg. It's a pester from Rose.

-tentacleTherapist [TT] began pestering ectoBiologist [EB] at 21:35-

TT: It might interest you to know Mr. Strider is awake in your apartment. He's probably going to go through your things.

EB: that's cool. there's not much to find.

TT: No journals with the words 'John Strider' written in them? Surrounded by hearts, perhaps?

EB: oh, haha. yes, rose. stacks of journals.

TT: He informed me that he proposed to you with a Ring Pop, and you said yes. Then he said I wasn't invited to the wedding. I don't think that's fair.

EB: there was no ring pop!

EB: now i feel cheated! and if there was a wedding, you could totally come.

TT: Thank you.

TT: I will plan out the entire thing. Kanaya is rather good with decorations, as you know. The two of us could provide you with the most lavish homosexual wedding of your dreams.

EB: oh, wow.

EB: now you've got me curious! :B

TT: I trust you're enjoying the visit that Dave rudely imposed on you?

EB: of course! he's so fun!

EB: he danced with me in my car. did he ever tell you about slam dancing?

TT: No, but I'm sure if it's something he invented, I'm not going to be too surprised by the idiotic name.

EB: yeah it's pretty stupid. hilarious though! he's also really…cuddly.

TT: Oh?

EB: yeah, like, he's always touching me. i never pegged him as a touchy feely guy.

TT: I don't think he is, John.

EB: huh?

TT: At least not to everyone.

EB: are you saying he's only that way with me?

TT: Am I?

EB: bluh!

TT: All joking aside, John, I really must be going. Kanaya has made me dinner, and she gets horribly impatient the longer she has to wait. I hope work is smooth for you.

EB: thanks rose!

TT: One last thing. Isn't tomorrow night the night you're going to the dance club with Dave?

EB: oh, yeah. i'm really nervous about it though. all those lights and loud noises!

TT: Yes, it can be overwhelming. Do be careful, and stick close to Dave, alright? Seattle can be dangerous at night, just as New York City can be.

EB: i know. my dad always says he'd rather me not go there if i can help it. dave will protect me though!

TT: Of course he will. He may be an immature narcissist, but he truly cares for you.

EB: uh…

TT: Goodnight, John.

-tentacleTherapist [TT] ceased pestering ectoBiologist [EB] at 21:54-

You scroll back up and review the messages. Her and Jade are both always saying things like that, and it confuses you. Rose talks to Dave every now and then, but lately it seems much more frequent. She's told you before he only talks to her when he's trying to decide something. It makes you wonder what he's thinking about. As for Jade, you're not sure when the last time they talked was. You yourself haven't talked to her since Dave informed you of his visit. You'll have to pester her later. But right now, you're going to pester Dave.

Alright, so that wasn't the best idea. Karkat held onto your phone for the rest of the night, and you just know he's talking to your contacts. You really should have signed out of Pesterchum before he yanked it from your hands. At least you know your friends will know the messages aren't from you. Only Karkat speaks in all caps like what he has to say is so important. The shift goes by even more slowly without your phone to keep you company, and you and Gamzee resort to building a card castle.

"What the fuck are you two numbskulls doing?" Karkat asks as he walks to the front of the register.

"Card castle, motherfucker," Gamzee says. "Building a mansion fit for a king."

"No, you're going to make a mess when it falls. Put the cards back in the box."

"C'mon, Karkat, you're being meaner than normal tonight," you whine.

"Oh, am I? It couldn't be because I have a brain dead juggalo wannabe and a love sick dickwad as employees, can it? No, it must all be me, because I'm just that much of an asshole. Yes, I love being mad, that has to be it. Thank you, Egbert. I'm simply enlightened."

"I think it's about time for a smoke break, Karbro," Gamzee grins. Karkat punches him in the shoulder.

"It's about time to close, you stupid insufferable nimrod. I don't have time to smoke. And Egbert, I'll give your phone back this time, but next time, I'm sending a mass message to every sexual offender in our area with your chumhandle on it, and they'll send you nude requests every day until you bless the earth with your rotting corpse."

"Um, thanks?" you say, holding your hand out for your phone. Before you put it in your pocket, you notice a few new messages, and sigh to yourself. You'll answer them on the way home.

Closing is easy, as it always is. You only made a few sales, so the drawer is fairly easy to count. Before you leave, Gamzee gives you a hug, like he always does. You don't know who's more cuddly, him or Dave. As soon as he lets you go, he wraps around Karkat, who reins fists upon him while yelling curses that would make Marilyn Manson uncomfortable, and you make your exit before they both involve you in the conversation.

As you get in your car, you check your messages.

-gardenGnostic [GG] began pestering ectoBiologist [EB] at 23:00-

GG: joooooohhhhnnnnn!

GG: i miss you!

GG: i know youre working right now but message me later!

GG: dont let dave take you from me D:

-gardenGnostic [GG] ceased pestering ectoBiologist [EB] at 23:03-

That was only an hour ago. Maybe she'll still be awake when you get home. Speaking of Dave, he's been messaging you all night, it seems.

-turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering ectoBiologist [EB] at 22:30-

TG: does karkitty still have your phone

TG: cause hes not answering it

TG: or does clown dude have it

TG: i get confused by all the typing you know cant follow that shit

TG: still not answering huh

TG: its almost midnight so you better let me know when youre on the way back

TG: okay its past midnight now egbert

You smile at the messages. It's just like him to be concerned, but act like he's not. Maybe you are getting better at reading him. Rose Lalonde would be proud.

EB: on the way now man.

TG: there you are

EB: karkat had my phone all night sorry.

TG: s cool

TG: so like

TG: hurry and shit

EB: yeah, yeah. we all know you miss me so much!

TG: whatever man im just bored

EB: i'm coming! jeeeeeeeeeeez.

You place your phone on the seat next to you, and drive home, all while fighting butterflies in your stomach.

As you walk through the threshold of your apartment, you catch a glance of Dave. He's on his back, sprawled on the couch with the remote in one hand. He's channel surfing, and doesn't notice you come in. You idly consider pranking him by sneaking up on him, but then realize you're too tired. Dealing with Karkat does that to you. So instead, you pad over to the couch quietly, and flop on top of him, your face in the crook of his neck. You expect him to be surprised, but he just stretches an arm around your waist and continues channel surfing.

"Long day?" he asks.

"So fucking long," you sigh. "Karkat vs Gamzee all night. I'm thinking of selling tickets for everyone to see what I go through."

"Yeah, I was kinda surprised by them too. They both messaged me over your chumhandle, and added me to theirs. That Gamzee is something else, man."

"He's a good guy, he's just…"

"A druggie?"

"Something like that. He's on some pretty strong medications for anger issues, so it keeps him pretty mellow. Plus all the weed he smokes adds to that, I guess. He's really nice though. Karkat lets him work there because no one else will hire him, and they went to school together. They both have hearts of gold."

"That's just like you to see the good in everybody. I could introduce you to a serial killer, and you'd invite him over to watch Ghostbusters."

"Someone has to see the good in people. It's too easy to see the bad, y'know?" you mumble, rolling your head to see the TV screen as the picture continues to flash through different networks. Dave's hand is rubbing circles on your back, and it's lulling you into a sense of calm you're not used to. His heart is beating in your ear, and you can't help but notice how fast it is.

"Yeah, that's true," he says quietly. "You goin' to sleep on me?"

"Mmmhmm…"

"Sweet. Platonic bro cuddles all night it is, then."

Both arms wrapping around you is the last thing you remember.

The next time you wake, it's bright in the apartment. The TV is still on, playing some special on Comedy Central. Dave's snoring quietly under you, and it's only then you notice your position. Your legs are tangled in his, and you're sleeping chest to chest, your hands curled under his shoulders while his are wrapped around you, one arm on your hip, and the other at the base of your neck.

Blushing furiously, you try to wriggle free of his grasp, but he only grips you tighter, mumbling sleepily. Finally, you manage to get your feet on the floor, and slap his arms away as they continuously try to grab you.

"Dammit, Dave, let go!" you hiss when he successfully pulls you back against him.

"Blankets aren't s'posed to move, Egbert…"

"I'm not a blanket! And if you want breakfast, you'll let me up!"

Grumbling, he does so, and then he rolls over to face the back of the couch and passes out again. Sighing, you drape the blanket over him, and make your way to the refrigerator. You're thinking about making pancakes, though you're not sure if Dave likes those or not. You consider asking him, but you doubt you'd get a straightforward answer from him right now, so you just decide to make them and see.

The smell must wake him up, because he's soon at the stove beside you, rubbing his eyes behind his shades sleepily.

"Why're you always up so early?" he groans. "'M still tired…"

"You're always tired. Besides, don't we have a long trip to Seattle today?"

"Oh, yeah… You makin' pancakes?"

"You like those, right?"

"Doesn't everyone?"

He jumps up on the small counter space and watches you as you continue to fry the batter, flipping it every now and then. Then you pull a plate from the cabinet, and begin piling them for Dave, who seems to almost be drooling.

"Syrup's in the cabinet over there," you point, laughing slightly when he hops off the counter to find it. You're just about to turn and hand him the plate when you feel wiry limbs wrap around you from behind, pulling your back into his chest.

"Thanks for the pancakes, babe," he mumbles, kissing the back of your head. You freeze where you stand, sputtering like an idiot while he reaches for the plate and takes it from you, spinning around to journey back to the couch. He's eating the pancakes ravenously while you try to control your heartbeat and breathing. Did that seriously just happen? How tired must he be? Does he know he did that? Is he messing with you?

Deciding not to mention it, you quickly make a few more pancakes, and join him on the couch. Dave has switched it to Animal Planet, watching some documentary on snakes, and you have to reach over him to snatch the syrup.

"I can't decide if snakes are hilarious, or terrifying," he says between bites. "I mean, they're fucking tubes with fangs, shimmying on the ground to kill shit."

"Terrifying," you say. "They're scary as hell."

"I think the only animal more ironic than a snake is a platypus. I'd kill for a pet platypus."

"Are you being serious right now?"

He looks over at you, and you can see your reflection in his shades.

"They have duck bills, have claws, and are poisonous. Fuck yeah, I'm serious! I'd hide that badass in Bro's apartment. Get back at him for all the Smuppet incidents."

"Wouldn't it kill him if they're poisonous?"

"Nah, not much can kill Dirk. He'd probably get some pills and then come kill me with a shitty sword. It's our blood feud, y'know. Strider shit."

"Sometimes I'm glad I'm an only child," you laugh. "But it would've been cool to have a brother."

You finish your breakfast while he scarfs his down at record speed. He leans back against the cushions while you lean over him to grab his plate, and make your way back to the sink. His head is leaned towards you, and you can tell he's watching you through his shades.

"I guess I'll shower and then we can get ready," you say. It's past noon, so you need to get moving soon. It's about an hour drive, and you don't know how long it takes to set up for such things as these. He nods.

"I took a shower last night, so I'm good. Just gotta get dressed," he says. "Better hurry along now, Egderp. Can't have you stinking up the car."

You stick your tongue out at him, and make your way to the bathroom, stopping to grab some clean clothes. The water is hot as it pours over you, and like always, your mind wanders under the steady stream of water.

You're having a hard time keeping up with Dave's sense of irony. Are all his tender displays of affection simply his way of testing the irony waters? How would you know anyway? You've never understood the Strider sense of ironic behavior. For the longest time, you doubted whether or not Dave actually even knew what irony was.

It's not that you don't welcome the embraces and the 'platonic bro cuddles'. It's just…making you feel a little odd. Not necessarily in a bad way, just in a way you aren't used to. Your heart is still beating furiously just thinking of the deep southern accented voice calling you 'babe'.

Maybe it could be something you get used to.

… Maybe it's something you'd like to get used to.

As you towel dry your hair and pull on a clean T-shirt, you exit the bathroom to see him propped against the counter, wearing a white shirt with a red plaid over shirt. His black jeans are tight, and there are holes in them, from strifes with his bro, you bet.

You both stare at each other for a minute, and then he walks over to you.

"Ready?" he asks.

"…Yeah," you say, and you are ready, just nervous. But you'll be with Dave, and there's no reason to feel too out of place.

He may be an immature narcissist, but he truly cares for you, Rose had said. And when his hand grabs yours to pull you from the building, you can't help but agree.

[I could show you love, in a tidal wave of mystery, you'll still be standing next to me. You could be my luck, even if we're six feet underground, I know that we'll be safe and sound. Safe and sound, safe and sound. Safe and sound, safe and sound. I could lift you up, I could show you what you want to see, and take you where you want to be. You could be my luck, even if the sky is falling down, I know that we'll be safe and sound, safe and sound.]

Sachi: Yay, we're getting into the gig scene! The night will be crazy, my friends. It'll be an epic next couple of chapters! I got so much feedback last time, I hope to do the same this time! Haha, reviews are a drug, yo! Gimme my fix!