So it's been awhile since I've updated, and I'm super sorry. Really, I am!
Unfortunately, I lent my older brother the flashdrive that had this chapter on it so that he could scan computer programs that he needs onto it. Then he decides, "Oh, there's not enough room on this. I'll just delete EVERYTHING so that my stuff fits."
You can thank SicklyPerverted, because her review made me realize that I was being "one of those people" who starts a story and then doesn't finish it. I feel animosity towards those people; I refuse to become one of them.
It's not half as good as it was originally, and I'm sorry for that. It's been so long that I don't even really remember what I wrote… so this is a sad imitation of what it was supposed to be.
Chapter Nineteen
Nowaki dropped his knife when he heard a loud moan come from the bathroom. All kinds of horrible images running through his mind, he bolted out of the kitchen.
He reached he entranceway to their bathroom. Then he froze.
"Hiro-san?"
At the mention of his name, Hiroki turned around.
"Go away," he muttered. "I'm fine."
He was flushed a brilliant red, but Nowaki wasn't sure why.
"What's wrong?" He took a step forward, holding out his arms to take the man into a hug.
"I told you, I'm fine!" Hiroki yelled, bolted backwards. "Leave me alone!"
Nowaki ignored him.
"Stop! Don't take another step!"
"Hiro-san, what's wrong?"
Hiroki debated for a moment whether to continue, but then he sunk to the floor and gave up. Nowaki was going to see sooner or later. He might as well get the embarrassment over with.
Nowaki leaned down in front of him. He put two fingers under his chin and lifted up.
Hiroki swallowed. "You don't have to look at it, you know." He closed his eyes tightly, not wanting to see the laughter in Nowaki's eyes.
But no laughter came. "Isn't what horrible?"
Hiroki rolled his eyes like it was obvious. "My face. Don't pretend like you don't see it."
"Hiro-san. You are beautiful."
He stroked his hands over Hiroki's cheeks, trying to soothe the man, but it only seemed to freak him out further.
Hiroki grabbed the hands on his face and yanked them away. "Don't touch it. That's so gross."
Nowaki frowned. "You could never be gross. Now tell me what's wrong."
Hiroki took a deep breath. Then, slowly, he pointed to his face, right where Nowaki's hands were moments before.
"What? Do you mean your pimples?"
Hiroki balked. Oh my god. He just said the p-word. This was beyond mortifying.
"It's not that bad, Hiro-san. Don't worry."
He pushed Nowaki's hands away. "Not that bad? How do you consider this as not bad?"
Nowaki grimaced. He hated it when Hiroki degraded himself. Why couldn't the man see that he was perfect? "Please, Hiro-san, don't worry. Really, I wouldn't have noticed except that you pointed them out."
"Come on, don't pretend they're not obvious."
"Don't say that…"
"I would never lie to you." They really weren't that bad. True, his skin looked worse than Nowaki had ever seen it, but he was still beautiful. Hiroki had mentally exacerbated the few blemishes on his face until he thought they were practically small mountains.
"They're huge. And now my face is red and ugly."
"Pimples are quite common around the two month period. Your hormones are just trying to adjust. And you could never be ugly, Hiro-san. Don't worry."
Hiroki doubled over, hiding his face in his palms. "And I was supposed to go drop some papers off at Miyagi's today too! I can't face him like this."
"Don't touch them. It'll make it worse," Nowaki said softly. He reached out to grab the man's hands and bring them down off his face.
Hiroki just went on like he didn't hear Nowaki speak. "I just won't go. He probably won't even remember I was coming." He nodded viciously like it was the perfect solution."
"Hiro-san, I don't think it's a good idea for you to ignore your work. Miyagi won't notice your pimples. They're really very small." Nowaki smiled to calm him down. "I can go with you if you want?"
Hiroki laughed. "Won't notice? Oh, he'll notice all right. That man is like a vulture when it comes to my humiliation."
Nowaki didn't comment. He didn't like Miyagi. Whenever Nowaki saw them together, Miyagi was hanging off of his Hiro-san like a leech. Their touchy feely attitude irritated him. Nobody else was allowed to touch Hiro-san like that.
He had already told Hiroki his concerns, but they were brushed off. He insisted that Miyagi wasn't serious.
Nowaki didn't really care if Miyagi was serious or not. Regardless, no matter the intentions, he didn't want anyone else touching Hiro-san.
He didn't want to be annoying though, so he didn't comment on his distaste for Hiroki's coworker.
"Do you want me to get you some cucumbers for your face?"
"What'll that do?"
Nowaki shrugged. "I heard that it was good for inflammation."
The man scowled. "Fine. I'll stay here, awaiting my doom."
"You're so cute, Hiro-san."
Hiroki just sank down further into the ground.
o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.
"Hiro-san, what's that on your head? You'll overheat!"
"It's just a beanie. It won't kill me."
Nowaki frowned. "The head is one of the major heat releasing points in the body. It's too hot outside; the accumulating warmth won't be good for the baby."
"And how big is the fetus right now?" he asked sarcastically. "A grain of rice? A jellybean? It'll be fine."
"Hiro-san, why are you even wearing a beanie? You usually don't wear it except in winter."
He reached over to snatch the hat off of Hiroki's head, but the man held it tightly to his head. "No! Don't take it!" But Nowaki was taller and stronger; he easily pulled it off. "Miyagi will see! Give it back!"
"Hiro-san, you have more self-confidence than that. Don't try to cover up your forehead pimples with a silly hat. You are beautiful no matter what. In fact"— he smiled as he decided how to phrase the next sentence— "you are so beautiful that every moment I get to spend with you makes my heart feels as though it is going to burst." He spread his arms wide to simulate how full he was of love.
Hiroki just scowled. There is no reasoning with Nowaki when he is like this, when he is all Ah, my Hiro-san is so cute! I just want to hug him and cuddle him and love him all day long! Hiroki scoffed. He was a man. Men weren't cute. Or beautiful.
But he did love Nowaki. And if there was one thing that he knew for sure, it was that Nowaki was the most beautiful man he had ever seen. So maybe, just maybe, it was possible for a man to be called beautiful. But Nowaki was an exception…
"You too. I love you too."
o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o
Hiroki eyed the doorbell. Maybe he should just leave it on the doorstep. He wouldn't have to see Miyagi and he'd be spared his humiliation. But then there'd be no way to guarantee that the man got the documents.
He debated with himself until Nowaki put a hand on his shoulder. Before Hiroki could stop him, he reached out and rang the doorbell.
"Stupid Nowaki!" he hisssed, "What'd you do that for? Now he's gonna answer!"
"Oh. I'm sorry, Hiro-san. I thought you wanted him to answer."
Damn. Why did Nowaki have to look at him with those big eyes? Those big puppy dog eyes that made it impossible to be mad at him. Hiroki looked away so that he didn't get drawn further into their depths.
"No, I actually didn't want him to answer." He furrowed his brows into an angry line. "Don't assume you know what I want."
Now it was Nowaki's turn to look away. His shoulders slumped, and Hiroki immediately felt bad for getting angry.
"Hey, don't worry. It's okay, you didn't do anything wrong."
Nowaki's face blossomed into a giant smile. "Oh, Hiro-san, you make me so happy."
Then the shorter man was swept up into a tight embrace, their chests pressing together. He couldn't breathe, so he tried to wiggle a little to make some space for his rib cage to expand.
But then, the door opened.
Nowaki's face slowly turned to face Miyagi. He tried not to glare at the man, he really did. It was just so hard to keep his smile intact while looking at Miyagi.
Hiroki immediately pushed Nowaki away. Now that Miyagi was here, he wanted to get out of there as fast as he could. Every moment was another moment that he risked exposing his blemished face.
He didn't look Miyagi in the eye, creating as much distance between them as possible.
"Here's some documents you need," he said quickly. "Everything is in the folder. Call me if you need something else." He then grabbed Nowaki's hand and began to drag him off the doorstep.
"Hey, wait. Kamijou! What's the rush?"
"No, no, there's no rush. I'm just—"
As screech from inside stopped Hiroki mid-sentence.
A boy appeared next to Miyagi in the doorframe. When he saw Hiroki, he immediately glowered and narrowed his eyes.
"Miyagi, what are you doing talking to him?" The spat the word like Hiroki was vile.
Hiroki felt hot anger rising in his body. Where'd the little brat get off saying things like that? He wanted to throw something at him, something big and heavy. His hands clenched and released, itching to feel a hardback book between his fingers.
Miyagi would be angry when he was done with the boy, but it didn't matter. It was a necessary sacrifice.
Miyagi turned to face the boy. "Come now, Shinobu-chin, don't be like that. Kamijou isn't that bad."
Shinobu lowered his voice in an angry whisper, but Hiroki could still hear.
"I don't want you talking to that man-whore, Miyagi. Every time you see him you—"
"No, it's not like that!" Miyagi opened his eyes wide and shook his head. "You know I'm just playing with him!"
Shinobu's hand shot out to wrap around Miyagi's tie. He pulled the man down.
He spoke through gritted teeth. "Well, maybe if you weren't playing with him so much, then you'd be home more to play with me." His eyes flashed as he heaved in anger.
Miyagi sighed, running a hand through his hair. "I've never… It's not like that." He tried to worm his way out of the impending argument— Shinobu could be rather aggressive when it came to Hiroki—but his defeat was imminent.
His head was pulled down even further. They were almost level now.
Shinobu looked him straight in the eye and growled low in his chest. "Make him go away."
Miyagi looked at Hiroki sheepishly, silently pleading him to do as the boy asked.
They were all too happy to comply. Shinobu made them both uncomfortable. The boy was so small compared to how scary he was. It was creepy.
They were walking away when a shout came from behind them.
"Hey Kamijou, I think you need to switch face soaps." Hiroki heard Miyagi giggle. "I'm not sure whether you're washing your face with pizza or fried chicken, but whatever it is, it's not working."
Hiroki froze, absolutely mortified.
Nowaki felt his hands clench into fists. He looked down, trying to calm himself.
Violence is bad. Violence is bad. He repeated the words to himself. Punching is not okay.
There was another chuckle from behind them.
Nowaki took a deep breath, but the laughter continued.
He turned around, feeling his anger bursting. His face was red and angry as he yelled, "Don't talk to Hiro-san like that!"
The two in the doorframe stilled, shocked by Nowaki's outburst. He was usually so calm and passive…
"No matter what Hiro-san looks like, he will always be infinitely more beautiful than you. Not only on the outside, but also on the inside!" Once the words started, they poured from his mouth like a waterfall. "You are an adult! Learn to act like one! Stop being a bully and get over yourself!" When he was finished, Nowaki stood still. His breathing was fast and erratic. He had never said something so reckless and mean…
He felt Hiroki's hand come around his wrist. He let himself be pulled away from Miyagi's apartment.
They walked in silence. Neither knew what to say. Hiroki was embarrassed about his skin; Nowaki was embarrassed about his actions.
Hiroki was the first to break the silence.
"You didn't have to do that, you know." He looked down at his shoes as he mumbled the words.
"Actually, I did."
They walked past a few stores without saying more. The sun was just beginning it's descent, casting shadows on the sidewalk. Nowaki watched the black outlines as they walked along. Their height difference was accentuated from the low position of the sun, stretching out their bodies. It made Nowaki feel strangely protective of Hiroki. He put his arms around Hiroki's shoulders and pulled him closer as they walked. The silence wasn't awkward; rather, it was comforting. They had both always been able to find solace in each other's mere presence.
A few minutes passed before Nowaki continued.
"I've never liked Miyagi. This just reaffirms my feelings towards him."
He moved his hand over to ruffle Hiroki's hair.
Feeling the hand resting in his hair, the shorter man looked away. Then, he slowly grabbed Nowaki's arm and trailed his fingers down the length until their hands were next to close. He entwined their fingers together and squeezed.
Nowaki squeezed back and didn't let go until they reached their apartment.
As I was re-typing this… I realized that mpreg is kinda one of the weirdest things I've ever encountered. And then I realized that all mpregs kinda sound the same.
I realize that this chapter is cliché. It was less cliché before my brother deleted the file, I promise.
Since I had to write this twice, you should all be good little reviewers. It would make me super duper happy!