Hey everyone,

thanks for reading!

Feel free to review, I love to hear your thoughts :)

much love,

W.


Your heart, I'll carry it with me …

Bella Swan moves to Forks where she meets Edward Cullen. But this is not your typical Bella and this is not the story you know.

Twilight fanfiction; I own nothing.


CHAPTER ELEVEN

People are born and die every day. It's a fact and everyone who has reached high school should be aware of that. So, why are people making such a big deal out of someone's lifespan expanding for some additional time? They should focus on poor conditions in Africa; donate their time to saving orphans; or, even better, they should drown themselves in textbooks and maybe end up finding miraculous cure for malaria!

Honestly, pretty much everything would be better than indulging in staring at me. I ODed on hugs and the sympathy looks were twisting my stomach. I want to be that inconspicuous girl in the background, wearing the grey sweater and hiding behind a book; high heels, fake boobs and peroxide are too bright of a spotlight for me.

Now I was one of those people on the cover of magazines who tell the world their story of a survival. Hey, People, backboard tried to kill me because I hate sports but I am fine now; bruises are healed, my blood is free of any meds and I forgave my assassin. It wasn't its fault; it got carried away by its emotions. It didn't think things through. I am alive and I forgave. Plus I got thousands for speaking out and making a fool out of myself. Everything for the money!

Mike certainly took the cherry off the top of my survival cake. Now that it was evident that I was attracting falling backboards he appointed himself as my personal bodyguard. It was just dreadful. He blocked the light when I was studying in the library. He was constantly buying me chocolates as if more sugar in my body would build anti-attack guns on my head. At Geography he was the one pointing on mentioned places on the map as if I was illiterate. At PE, well, at least there he didn't do anything. I could almost kiss the professor when I got excused from participating for a week while getting over PTSD.

I thought Biology at least would be a holiday for me, without Mike in the classroom. I was such Emma Bovary, living in ideals, ignoring the truth. Somehow I managed to transform Tyler into a harmless extra. Of course, the salary wasn't big enough for him to sign the contract.

I don't know much about collaborating since I am an only child and cooking edible things in our home means 0% involvement from anyone that isn't me, but I do think the effort I put into the project didn't match Tyler's. All I did was color the letters of the title; the headlines, the pictures, even the paper and pens were his. I wish I could say it felt like holding margarita in my hands and lying on a sandy beach somewhere on Vanuatu but really, it just made me feel bad.

Guilty consciousness is a bitch. And Tyler is not a saint for inflicting me one, either! It was a hostage situation and I was all out of money. Of course, I could not say no when he asked me to give him my jewellery – I mean, when he invited himself over to my house to finish the project.

I almost wished Brenda Spencer would appear on the roof of Forks High School and shoot me dead.

Charlie is a cop. a cop in a really small town but I guess he did have to pass some basic training. There was no way I could hide the urgent vacuuming after coming home from school.

"Dad … my friend, Tyler, is coming over today," I mumbled when Charlie came home. Even I wanted to be deaf and not hear the words I was saying so I can't imagine how Charlie must have been feeling.

He put the car keys down very slowly and it was totally the nails on the black board moment. Was I about to get grounded? I hoped so.

"Tyler?" he finally said.

"Yeah … we're working on a biology project together." Well, Tyler is most likely also preparing PowerPoint presentations of our wedding but for me it is strictly business.

"I thought Edward Cullen is your partner," Charlie said, still clearly lost in his thought. If he was wondering where the bullets to his gun were, well, they are in the top drawer of his night stand. I checked. I really needed one in my cardiac ventricle, like right now.

Apparently I do need a personal body guard by my side at all times. I tripped over the vacuum cleaner and how I managed not to fall on the glass table and bleed to death, is a million dollars question.

No, it wasn't obvious at all.

"I was tutoring him maths," I corrected him.

"Well, whatever you two were doing, he is certainly not acting gratefully."

My head turned into a major tomato. If someone was willing to eat it and relieve me of this embarrassment, I would truly be grateful for life.

My mission of spreading hatred for Edward Cullen is apparently on the right track; only, I didn't infect me but Charlie. Ever since Edward 'abducted' me from the hospital bed and drove me home, something, according to Charlie's transparent eyes, that is father's duty, he put Edward on his crap list. Not sure of he's numero uno, but I'm certain he's in top 3.

"It wasn't his idea, dad, I wanted to get out of the hospital but I really didn't want to meet anyone …" I repeated for like the billionth time.

"Yeah, sure," he shrugged, trying to look unaffected but his sweaty forehead revealed he was drowning in discomfort. "So why didn't you ask Tyler to drive you home?"

"Why would I ask Tyler to drive me home?"

"Well, didn't you say he's your Biology partner?"

"I didn't choose him to be my partner, dad, we're not exactly friends. Professor selected pairs."

"Oh, so Edward Cullen is your friend?"

I don't know what a friend is in police jargon, but from the sound of Charlie's voice, it didn't mean anything particularly good. I always excel at this kind of exercises at exams but I felt like I was going to fail this one, whichever way I chose.

"Can we talk about this later? I still have to clean…"

Men. Didn't Oprah once say they weren't that much into talking? Charlie was breaking down all the stereotypes. He looked willing to stand there and talk until the apocalypse came. Well, at least the stereotype about men hating chores was still true. He could offer to put glasses on the table, but no, I guess he could stretch a muscle.

"Look, Bella …" I hope mum told him that there was no need to give me that sex talk every parent dreads. Mum had already given me one and, gosh, I wish I didn't know as much as I do. Sometimes being knowledgeable really makes you a smartass. A heart-broken smartass. "I am aware that you are a teenage girl and … if you want to …. Have … boyfriends … or go out on dates … you can. I won't stop you, just … be careful, alright?"

"I don't want Tyler to be my boyfriend!" I exclaimed. did we switch places? Is this Freaky Friday 2.0, no, I mean 3.0 and I am supposed to be Lindsay Lohan? Then I'll just go clone myself and send my twin sister here coz this high school dating world freaks the hell out of me! Comparing to Phoenix, the Forks people certainly make up for the difference in weather temperature with heated romance talks! I don't even want to know how the actual romancing looks like!

"It's got nothing to do with me!" of course, like any real man, when troubles are on the horizon, it was time for Charlie to back off. "Do whatever you want, Bella."

"I will."

Well, if I was a tomato, that afternoon certainly changed into a strained mess. Tyler was very nice and he is a guy any girl would … hell, who am I kidding? I don't want anyone. Well, I don't want Tyler or Mike; I just can't make myself tell that to me because they are both your sooooooooooooooooo nice to me. So, yes, I am a damned leech! I suck Tyler's enthusiasm and willingness to do school work for me and I suck Mike's kindness and his selfless sacrifice … I make both think that I am grateful … I am, don't get me wrong, I just don't want to get married because of this gratitude… where are we, in India? Why does everyone here sees a wedding as a refund?!

I couldn't focus on the task in front of me. I just nodded every time Tyler asked me something. I blankly stared into the photo of Dolly the sheep and wished I had a clone myself. I would just pass this terrible burden to her and go away and never come back. Yes, I wanted to run away! This feminist, this stand up for yourself and screw what everyone else thinks girl wanted to back down and run away, preferably limbo dance style! I wanted to throw away all my beliefs just because I was on the radar of two guys! I know I should just tell Tyler that he ain't gonna make bread out of this flower. But then I would hurt his feelings and since revenge is a bitch I would … end up with an F at Biology coz he would tell the professor the real driving force behind the project …

As I grabbed a glass of water and drank it down, I wanted to just drown in it. Just let it flow into my lungs; I wouldn't fight, I wouldn't cough. I would walk straight into death, leave all my problems behind. Let someone else deal with them. Observe from the hell the battle of my wannabe husbands, all fighting for the title of the most grief-stricken.

I'm such a bitch.

"Listen, Bella …" Tyler was either a mind reader or maybe I was a long way from having a poker face. "You and Newton … are you two … you know … together?"

Santa almost granted me a wish! A sip I was taking went down the wrong way and I know my face turned blue as I tried to show it the right highway. Yay, I still wanted to live, apparently! I want to see my children graduate and hold their babies in my arms! I certainly won't let one boy take these dreams away from me!

"Together? Why would you say that?" I said in a voice of a perishing lady.

"Well ... you just seem to be very close …"

"No, we're not together … we're just … friends …"

Only that Mike probably expected some benefits. He did save my life; I should know that in 21st century people don't just do things and expect nothing in return.

"Oh, ok!" he exclaimed. Oh, if only cheerfulness could kill! This seed had to be derived any water before it dared to sprouts.

"But Tyler … I am not really into dating any one right now … school work is kinda killing me …"

"Yeah, yeah, I understand …"

I could see maths on his face. If I help her with some other project, she will have more free time and we could shag … well, I don't think there are enough numbers to depict the latter.

I should just say that I am Bianca Stratford and I am not allowed to date.

Or that I have some medical condition, like, migraines. Who wants a girl who always has headaches?

Ah, well, maybe I should just try the truth. Once the project is safely graded already, of course.

Yeah, I was so blissfully unaware of what was just around the corner …


To Be Continued.

Broughttoyouby:::winter.