Authors note: Alright, is finally caught up with the Ao3, so that means that this and the Ao3 story can be updated at the same time until this can catch up with the story over at space battles. I hope you enjoy it!

Chapter Eight
Who taught monkeys how to form an army?

Experience has reached the required level. Scouting Drone, Roger, has increased from LV 5 to LV 6. Skill proficiency level-up bonus acquired. Proficiency has reached the required level. Skill [Intimidation LV 6] has become [Intimidation LV 7]. Skill [Fire Manipulation LV 7] has become [Fire Manipulation LV 8]. Skill [Hovering LV 5] has become [Hovering LV 6]. Skill Points Acquired.

Experience has reached the required level. Scouting Drone, Roger, has increased from LV 6 to LV 7. Skill proficiency level-up bonus acquired. Proficiency has reached the required level. Skill [Mind Control Resistance LV 1] has become [Mind Control Resistance LV 2]. Skill [Pain Resistance LV 1] has become [Pain Resistance LV 2]. Skill [Arithmetic Processing LV 1] has become [Arithemetic Processing LV 2]. Skill Points Acquired.

Experience has reached the required level. Scouting Drone, Roger, has increased from LV 7 to LV 8. Skill proficiency level-up bonus acquired. Proficiency has reached the required level. Skill [Mind Control Resistance LV 2] has become [Mind Control Resistance LV 3]. Skill [Pain Resistance LV 2] has become [Pain Resistance LV 3]. Skill [Flame Manipulation LV 8] has become [Flame Manipulation LV 9]. Skill Points Acquired.

"Ah, the sight of burning monkeys, what a beautiful sight... if only I could still smell their roasting bodies, oh well!" I spoke aloud before looking for my companion, who fled from the scene. I had reached level eight. I was looking forward to spending some skill points on new stuff I could get. I can't exactly buy magic-related abilities, mainly because of the nonexistence that was my MP. How exactly does a robot utilize magic if it couldn't use them?

As I looked for the spider that was my friend, I heard a blood-curdling scream, almost sounding like that of a person in distress or something. It almost sounded like the brutish monkeys screaming, only in a different vocal range. 'Wonder what that was?' I thought before moving to the source of the noise. For all I knew, more EXP was available to be at hand.

Turned out that it was my friend who had killed a monkey. She greeted me as I approached her and the freshly made kill, and I laid down to look at the appraisal skills progress.

Scouting Drone
LV 8 Roger
HP: 40/40
MP: 0/0
SP: 76/90

Attack: 30 (+15)
Magic: 0 (-9000)
Speed: 90
Defense: 40
Resistance: 60

That's definitely new and all. Looking over all my stats, they're pretty good, besides magic. Need to up my defense if I want to confront more enemies head-on. My attack's pretty good, but not good enough to see where we are. Plus, look at my resistance! It's at a perfect sixty, and at a level of eight, that's pretty good. Speed looks like it needs some work. The only thing right now that's really bad here is my magic... and it's being lessened to zero because of a debuff by, oh, a negative nine thousand. That can't be good, right? I mean, by what it says, this only meant that I couldn't use magic, period, whatsoever.

Should I tell my only friend in this hellhole that? I mean... This was a huge debuff, and it's a permanent issue. Never mind that if my companion has MP at all, that subtracts me from the dynamic of using magic... or she could be the spell caster. I could be the tank... eh, I'll figure it out later.

Meanwhile, my only friend here yawned, before looking to the ceiling, probably with an idea in mind. 'I wonder what she has in mind? Hopefully, it doesn't involve heights.' I wondered, after the whole Araba thing back there. If I didn't want to go through a situation involving great heights again. I'd be better off.

Turns out it did involve heights again. Anyway, my spider friend had crafted a barely big enough platform that the both of us could fit on together. Now, you might be wondering how I got up here. Well, you see... she used her web to pull me up here so I could be on the same platform as her. It also gives me a unique opportunity to level up my hovering ability. Let me tell you, it can be helpful.

Just how would the hovering plus a great height equal helpful? Well, all I can say is that morning I woke up, I was met with an unwelcoming gathering below.

Monkeys, angry ones at that, were grouping up from below. They didn't seem accepting, probably mad that I massacred, like four or so of their own... wait, fuck, that's why they're here. Is it? They want revenge. If they're seeking revenge, it was too bad I didn't care. If those stupid monkeys try anything, it will be their last moments living on this planet.

Turning on intimidation, I shouted at the stupid monkeys to go away. That only made them angrier... why is this skill, at a level seven, causing me so much trouble!

Then out of nowhere, a small pebble was thrown at my face, and I decided enough was enough. My friend, who was now awake, probably because of me shouting at the monkeys to go away, looked over the edge of the platform and saw what I saw.

"If you fucking dare throw another rock at me, I'm going to make your life past tense, make you see the gates of heaven, and make your free trial at life end abruptly!" I shouted at the group of monkeys, not caring about the fact that the monkeys didn't understand me. For a moment, everything was quiet, peaceful even. 'Ok, maybe now they'll sto-' my thoughts were immediately interrupted as six pebbles made contact with my face. It was at this moment that I snapped.

As I brought out all of my blowtorches, several monkeys began to climb up the stone wall to try and reach us. My spider friend provided a defense by shooting some web that would stop the monkeys in their tracks. She started using magical poison attacks. Me, however? Well, let's say I also started up my propellers.

Before I could get into the air, monkeys with more rocks began to throw even more rocks into the sky. Well, then... guess I'll attack from here instead. Now, let's see if I can use fire manipulation to make a fireball to throw at those dumb monkeys.

Charging up one blow torch, I then pointed the blow torch over the edge of the platform and shot out a single ball of fire at a monkey throwing a rock in our direction. The ball of fire landed on the monkey, resulting in said monkey catching on fire. Then I readied the other blow torches to rain hell fire over these brainless apes. But as I got ready to do so, I saw more monkeys now than there initially were. Almost as if they were forming an... army. Well then, looks like we're about to have a bloody blood bath!

Balls of liquid poison and fireballs were slowly killing off the monkeys, but they were not going to be enough if more monkeys kept showing up. My friend tried to take out the monkeys climbing up the wall while I sniped any monkeys that kept throwing rocks at us. The only bad thing was that by using the blow torches I had built into me, I was also using up my SP. The same thing I need to live.

Yeah, if anything, I was not purposely built to fight an entire army, whether they were monkeys or men. At any rate, I could handle a handful of these guys, and maybe I could wipe the floor with them. I only needed to get rid of the rock throwers to use the unique technique using flame thrower + helicopter = war crimes and success.

So that's what I did! There were fewer monkeys throwing rocks down there than before, so that meant carrying out simple removals of ranged-based enemies, and then I was clear for takeoff. As I started up my propellers once again, A monkey had managed to reach the platform and looked at the two of us, only to be wrapped up in webbing and then met the furious flames of death, catching on fire... only for it to launch itself off the platform and far away from the wall itself.

That stupid monkey... just killed themself so that he couldn't be in a car accident, causing a three-mile-long traffic jam. 'What? I'm American and an American from the industrialized midwest, so what do you expect?' I thought to absolutely no one. Why aren't there people like that darn monkey? Anyways, this only caused me to have one thought to fly through what took place for a skull:

'These monkeys really want to fight, then I will give them an unfair one.' I thought before taking off from the platform. Then, I turned my body around, prepped the blow torches, and directed them at the monkeys climbing the wall. The next thing I saw was a wall of fire. Monkey after monkey, blistering and burning heat... and then a random thought popped up in my brain(Processor?), and the thought made me pause. 'I sure am using a lot of fire... does this make me a pyromaniac?' I thought until a roar caught my attention. Turning around, I saw a familiar sight.

They were the same monkeys from before. The same kind of monkeys that I killed earlier. And they looked extra pissed off at me... given how there were seven of them.

Proficiency has reached the required level. Skill [Flame Manipulation LV 9] has become [Flame Manipulation LV 10].

Condition satisfied. Skill [Flame Control LV 1] has been derived from skill [Fire Manipulation LV 10].

Condition satisfied. Acquired Title [Pyromaniac]. Acquired skills [Taboo LV 1] and [Lesser Fire Magic LV 1], and [Heretic Magic LV 1] as a result of title [Pyromaniac]. Error: As a result of the title [Mana-less Machine], you gain a +100 to magic.

Well, well, well. Turns out I can get more skills by maxing out other skills. Well then, looks like I'm about to have fun killing some donkey kongs!

But before I could do anything, I had barely dodged a giant boulder thrown at me. Looks like these silly Dk's want to brawl, huh? Unfortunately for them, they were all going down in flames.

If you were to ask me if there was anyone I could trust, but only with wiping out my enemies and cooking me food, I would have to say, Roger. Sure, he had the title [Pyromaniac], causing him to mentally be akin to fire. With his cooking and with his innate ability to wipe out armies in our way, he could be trusted to take out anyone in our way. He certainly did come a long way from being a tiny drone compared to what he was now.

Though he wasn't entrusted with leading an entire army. Sure, he was good with fighting armies, but taking charge of an army? That wasn't his kind of thing.

And if I have to tell a secret, his chocolate cake is the best, thanks to his cooking skill.