I know what you're thinking another chapter so quickly? I know. I'm totally spoiling you all but I couldn't help it. This chapter is the yin to the last chapter's yang. For all the heavy feels in this chapter it didn't take me that long to write.

As always I' like to thank all the lovely people who read the last chapter. I've had quite a few new followers and favs and I'm very grateful that so many people are enjoying my story.

Last chapter was an Eric chapter, this one is a Sookie chapter but if you're very good our favorite big blond viking just might make an appearance ;)

Chapter 4 When Did Life Get So Hard?

Sookie

Trying to get back into the swing of things I plastered a big smile on my face as I walked into Merlotte's on my second day back working. It was only part-time but I didn't care. I belonged here, these people were my family.

I was still young but I couldn't imagine myself doing anything else. From what Lafayette had said Tara had left town for good and started a life somewhere else, away from all the craziness here. Today I envied her. Too much had happened to me in this little town. Even if I did the same job I'd be somewhere else.

I had thought about just leaving several times since I'd met Bill Compton and vampires had become a part of my life. I wished I could leave all the pain behind, I even started packing sometimes but something always stopped me. In the end I could never leave, this was my home.

I had people here that I cared about, I couldn't bear the thought of leaving them behind. So I stayed and fought and fought and fought. People have never thought much of me, they think even less now. Ever since I got myself involved with vampires their opinion of me steadily grew worse.

Tonight it was in full swing as word spread that I was back. Not much happened around here so when something gossip-worthy happened they were all over it. I was able to block them out mostly. At least it was good for business, that was something right?

Another thing in my favor was that I was working the day shift. That meant that not many were drinking and those that were generally kept it to a minimum. I was looking forward to later though. Arlene said she'd bring her son so I could meet him even though she wasn't working today.

That happy thought kept me going through most of my shift. Some a the thins people were thinkin bothered me but some a the thins they thought I was doing while I was gone were so funny.

Like most days today was a mix of good and bad, neither one outweighing the other too much. However I still found myself fighting through a gray haze and keeping my barriers up was taking its toll. For once the everyday routine of it all did not bring me comfort.

I'd had many days like today and I knew they only got so bad and that tomorrow things would be better as things quieted down and people processed the news of my return. Soon I would be yesterday's news and all this would be forgotten, I would once more be crazy Sookie and nothing more.

*Forgetting*

I sat down to have a quick dinner at 6, my shift was over at 9. Soon Arlene and Terry would stop by and I would get to see Mickey for the first time. I went through the last leg of my shift happier and lighter than I had been all day.

Time flew by and soon Arlene walked in with her baby in the kiddie carrier strapped to her chest and Terry by her side. He was the cutest little thing I'd ever seen! Then he smiled at me and I was lost. Colby and Lisa were little angels but this little guy was her masterpiece.

I was looking forward to babysitting for him and hoped I'd get to see him grown up. Both his parents had troubles aplenty but together they seemed stronger and happier than I'd ever seen him. I hoped that things stayed that way for them. They deserved that after all they'd been through.

I was happy for them but I knew then that I'd never have what they did, I'd never belong with anyone. Instead of wallowing in my impending solitude I focused on Mickey. There was something about a baby's smile that can make you feel better no matter what.

Duty intruded too soon. I had to go back to work. Arlene and Terry said goodbye and left. I waved as they moved out the door and didn't stop til I couldn't see them anymore. I went back to serving customers but I was on automatic. I didn't trust myself to think right now.

I focused on my work and before I knew it 9 o'clock arrived and my shift was over. I went to go get my things in Sam's office. He was waiting for me. As usual he was concerned about me.

He said to take it slow, things have a way of working out they just need time. I just needed some time to catch up, to get back into the rhythm of things. It may seem overwhelming now but things were never as bad as they seem. Its just another day, another month, another year.

Nodding I assured him that it was just stress and those damn gossip mongers. On my way home I decided to rent a movie. Turns out that Blockbuster had gone under while I was away. The other video store was still open, my only other option was Redbox.

I may not be Jimbo Henry's biggest fan but I'd pick him over a machine I didn't know how to use any day. Tomorrow I could figure out how to use a Redbox but tonight I just wanted to have a movie night, no fuss. I'd had a long day and I was all thinked out. His shop was on the other end of town so I turned the car around.

Town wasn't large so I got to the other end of it in a matter of minutes. Jimbo was happy to see me alive and well. He helped me personally and in less than five minutes I was walking out the door still thanking Jimbo for being so helpful. I wasn't sure what I'd rented exactly but Jimbo said it was the movie of the year.

*Forgetting*

Pulling into my driveway I sighed. Home again. I turned off my La Sabre and made sure I got everything out of it before I moved to the back door to unlock it. I didn't bother locking my car, the passenger door wouldn't lock so there was no point. I did make sure I never left anything in my car because of it though.

Once I got inside and had put my things away, I stretched. Then I changed into my bedclothes so I'd be more comfortable. Now that I'd made myself comfortable I went about getting my movie night going. While the popcorn was popping I got a bowl ready.

I heard a noise behind me and I turned around to face Eric Northman. Apparently that noise was his way of announcing his presence. He picked a good night because tonight I just didn't care anymore.

I always felt calmer around him for some strange reason so I thought about inviting him to stay and watch my movie with me. Besides its not like I could kick him out so I might as well enjoy his company while he was offering it.

Looking at him now I could see a worn expression stretched across his face similar to my own. It seems that I wasn't the only one who'd had a hard day today. Damn that sad puppy face, I couldn't turn him away when he looks so sad, the southern lady in me won't allow it.

Grabbing my bowl of popcorn I went into the living room. He followed just like I knew he would.

"I was just about to watch a movie do you want to join me?"

His brow quirked up as he responded, "Really? I wasn't exactly expecting a warm welcome but it is a most welcome surprise."

"Not that it would work but I've had too long a day to bother with trying to kick you out of my house. You want to be here and as long as you don't cause trouble you can stay."

His face breaking out in a true smile, "Well then Miss Stackhouse what are we watching?" As a response to his query I handed him the DVD I'd rented at Jimbo's. Beaming even wider now he said as he handed the case back to me so I could load it into the player, "This should be interesting. This was the biggest movie of last year. It would have been a shame if you had missed this. I'm not fond of modern cinema and even I enjoyed this film."

Rolling my eyes I loaded the disk into the player and sat beside him on the couch.

So how did you like that lovelies? R&R