No one claimed to remember when the tradition...ritual...chore started. As uncomfortable and awkward as it made its honoree, no one really wanted to admit that it was their idea. But one realization led to another.

Dr. McCoy helped them out entirely too much. Sure, Professor Xavier had his degree (was it psychology or genetics? no one was going in his office to find out for certain but psychology felt like cheating for a telepath) but Dr. McCoy was a genius. Since Forge was still in the closet, the technology the X-Men as a team ran on was all Dr. McCoy's design even though everyone was sure Dr. McCoy's actual degree was actually in evolutionary biology despite he was evidently a licensed medical practitioner. The man quite clearly would have been anything he wanted in the field of science, if it were not for what non X-gene positive people thought of his appearance. So the man quietly and professionally also saw to the medical needs of children that saw way too much combat, enough to make a Danger Room break even as an investment, and hospitals were very reluctant to admit - potentially lethal skin, uncontrollable eye beams, nightmares that could quite literally sleep walk into psychiatric wards, etc.

But while Beast could move himself through nearly any environment with the greatest of ease, moving around himself (particularly after his mutation advanced) was somewhat problematic. Adding in that washing mats of human blue fur was not something most shampoos let alone combs were designed for, appearances and occasional smells showed how problematic. No one would admit they remembered who callously asked Nightcrawler about his fur or who noticed Kitty's blushing expression. Everyone just sort of came to a two plus two equals four conclusion about the situation.

At first, Dr. McCoy would somehow figure out what the girls of the school intended. Back then, he would lock himself in his office and then either Jean would unlock the lock or Kitty would nudge him through the floor. Back then, he would use a lot of five dollar words to carefully not reproach the girls about their attire and then Boom Boom made a point of it in a truly scandalous microkini and Dr. McCoy never suggested their team uniforms again.

So now Wash Night did not happen every Thursday night. But when one of them noticed an untended blue furred tangle, an itch that just would not abate despite those claws, or even just a look in a mirror that lingered too long one of the girls would make what a teenage girl thought was a subtle gesture to another and the message would spread. They never caught on to how Dr. McCoy figured out that it was coming. But now with both Rhaine and X-23 able to search for him by scent instead of Jean's telepathy, finding Dr. McCoy (who had long ago learned that hiding in his office was as useless as appealing to his authority as an instructor) was much easier. And despite his strength, the multiple powers of the female student body got the large man back to the school's infirmary with only minimal bickering.

Most followed Jean's lead with a simple pony tail, a tank top that might get a bit clingy when wet but was an opaque enough color, and a pair of shorts. Some followed Tabitha's use of a swim suit, even if no one tried to keep up with her audacity. (She would cheekily defend her choice of attire by first pointing out that the United States did not have universal healthcare and she understood she no longer attended the school for gifted youngsters and secondly shaking parts of her anatomy and reminding of the word cheekily). Of course Rogue was confined to a wet suit, although she had tried a burkini once. Paige tried simply being rubber but after bouncing off the walls literally and after ripping the wrapping off of herself, she was bouncing off the walls metaphorically for hours more.

One thing that people did remember was that Jean came up with gossiping during the entire enterprise. They remembered a time when Dr. McCoy was awkwardly trying to ignore several well exercised, teen but still under age, students of his grooming his entire body and their resultant awkward silence. But now everyone could quite plausibly agree that the grown man was adamantly ignoring teenage schoolgirl babble.

X-23 did not see the need for it. "Left foot.", she commanded in a tone that brooked no argument. Dr. McCoy placed his foot to the wash stool in front of her own. X-23 turned to the tray of files and wire brushes more appropriate to a metal shop than an infirmary, leave alone a shower, and selected one while wandering fingers over his smallest talon.

"So, like, Amanda, like, wanted, like, Kurt, like, to go, like, with her, like, to the, like, movies.", Kitty complained while trying to phase individual locks of fur through others to untangle the knots that would sometimes form on Dr. McCoy's back. "But uh-uh. I, like, was so, like, like, nu-uh. That was, like, our, like movie night. I, like, might not, like, be, like, dating him but, like, he's, like, my, like friend too."

Jubillee paused in her combing. "How am I actually from the Valley and you're from 'like' Chicago?"

"You know you don't need to worry about 'mandy, Kitty-cat.", Tabitha declared from her leaning post while not actually putting any work in except for the occasional preening or jiggle.

Annoyed, Pryde responded. "I know that. And I get that she should get priority as his girlfriend. I'm just saying, like, I should get some time with him too. She wouldn't even be dating him if I had chosen to first."

X-23 looked up from the claw she was polishing to glare questioningly at the girl.

"I'm not dating him!", Kitty admonished.

X-23 remembered the last time she sought clarity about two people smelling of a combination of prophylatics and pharmacueticals were the only thing keeping them from being underage parents and decided on other words. "Rogue, do you think we should take Toad to the movies?"

Rogue set down the buckets of soapy water she had made. Because how else was she going to contribute? Get in the middle of a bunch of scantily clad people washing someone with her skin? "Huh. Ah actually hadn't considered it. Maybe. What do think he'd want to see?"

"Your breasts."

Rogue sputtered. "I meant which movie.", she told everyone.

X-23 furrowed her brow. "But Magma said/"

"Oh, no she didn't.", Amara cut off.

"that Americans say/"

Amara nodded. "Okay, I might have actually said that."

"that teenagers don't go to the movie theaters for movies."

"The logistics wouldn't be good for a first date, X-23.", Paige informed. "With you on one side of Todd and Rogue on the other, how would he get to know me?"

Silence. Utter silence. Every girl besides Rogue and X-23 herself turned to the now absolutely motionless Guthrie.

"You haven't forgotten that you can't turn into a statue without removing your skin, right lass?", Rhaine asked.

"Sh!", Paige breated while still hoping to just blend into the background. "People'll notice me if you're looking at me."

X-23 worked a rag and auto wax to, having worked the file and sand paper, polish Beast's nail. "I've heard tell that teenage girls wish to disappear from social circumstances that are embarrassing. Are you embarressed by wanting to date Todd. Because if that's the case/"

"It's not the case, Lau...X-23.", Paige stated. "It's my first date. I don't need anyone making fun of me. Particularly for trying to be someone's third girlfriend."

Kitty giggled. "That's right. Toad would be dating three girls."

Silence. Everyone stared at Kitty including Tabitha. "Like, what?"

"Two things, Guthrie.", Rogue told her. "First, we're mutants. People are going to say whatever about us anyway. If you're going to let that bother you, then you'll need the Professor's therapy more than any of us. Second, it's like Magnus says, we're mutants. We're making up our culture as we go along and we're going to be doing things are own ways. And considering how many males need a pop in the mouth, doubling up's inevitable."

"Excuse me, young Rogue.", Dr. McCoy interjected.

"Sorry, doc.", Rogue apologized. "Considering how many males are inherently undatable, doubling up's gonna be inevitable."

Jean raised an eyebrow.

"Lookit. We're about even here in the school, right?", Rogue continued. "Boys to girls."

Jean thought a moment. Rogue, Kitty, herself on the other side of Scott and Nightcrawler. Paige and her brother. Jaime and Rhaine. Amara, X-23, Jubille...lation and Bobby, Ray, and Roberto. Huh.

"And mark off Bobby once he comes out the closet."

"Bobby's not gay.", Jean objected.

X-23 laughed. When the girls turned to her, she explained. "'Marvel Girl's a telepath. Hm...Marvel Girl?"

Jean bulldozed over the sentiment. "I've caught him checking out me wearing a skirt. He'd like to get under it."

"So he can wear it."

"Hush, you.", Rogue ordered. "Now consider the Brotherhood. Todd, of course. But Pietro is as prickly as his tomcat father with none of the gravitas of his father and comes part and parcel with Wanda. Who's volunteering for Fred? Lance?"

"I've been, like, down that road. Never again.", Kitty muttered.

Silence. "Lance, not Fred." More silence. "Look at Jean like that. She tried Fred."

"I certainly have not 'tried Fed'.", Jean defended. "But I concede that one and only one point."

"Okay, take the Acolytes of Magnus. And these are the people we know can be actually socialized enough to operate as somewhat of a team. Pyro. Sabretooth. Mastermind./"

"Piotr's not a bad guy.", Tabitha interjected. "Mag's just...well, went all Mags on his sister."

"Lord, is there anything that man hasn't stooped to?", Rogue breathed. "Okay, so one out of how many? And they're all male. Besides a new sister."

"What about Gambit?", Jubilee smiled.

Rogue frowned. "What about that swamp rat?

"Wait, is 'swamp rat'...?"

X-23 looked up from her next nail. "Racist?" Rogue nodded. "Not against black people."

"Goldangit."

"European descendants.", the girl explained.

"Ah'm white.", Rogue shrugged. "Okay, so to balance them off. Who do you got? My moms. And that's not enough. Then add in Apocalypse unless one of you have some fetishes left best not understood. The Morlocks, do they have a ratio that favors boys and are we putting them on the table as datable?"

"Morlocks?", X-23 asked.

"Evan joined them. They live in the sewers of New York and make a point of telling everyone that they're 'not presentable' because they 'can't pass'.", Jean explained as she continued to comb out Beasts hair, not fur. "Which is complete b...aloney. And Scaleface was dating...well, Ray. And, okay, they don't have a male heavy ratio either."

"Alright, shug.", Rogue said. "Go on. Name somebody else X-gene positive you spent more than twenty minutes with."

"Forge!"

"Who's going to build his own girlfriends.", Rogue countered. "Next?"

"Mr. Warrington.", Jean remembered. "You can't say that no one wants to date him."

Rogue nodded. "And you can't say that he wouldn't be able to have more than one girlfriend. But just to balance it, Danielle."

"Oh, right, Danielle.", Jean acknowledge. "Um...Mr. Logan's people don't help this."

"Omega Red, Maverick, and Kestrel?", X-23 recounted. "No, they do not. Unless you meant Itsu, Atsuko, Mariko, Yukio, Yuriko, Lin...", she trailed off. X-23 snapped her fingers in front of Jubilee's face and the girl seemingly woke up. "But that bolsters Rogue's point."

"Fine.", Jean conceded. "But there's more than us out there."

"That also favor's Rogue's idea.", X-23 said. "Magneto has children by more than one woman."

"Uh, the Maximoff twins are twins.", Jubilee stated.

"There's also...pol...Polarizer? Poles? their younger half-sister.", X-23 announced. Jean caught the next thought and glared at her. "And there was his first daughter, Anya Eisenhardt. She never manifested before her village burned her alive."

"Omigod.", Kitty exclaimed. "How do you find that out?"

"I heard him sobbing on her birthday.", X-23 replied while moving on to the next nail. "Didn't you?" She paused. "Oh. My senses."

"Yes. 'Oh.'", Jean spat while still glaring at X-23.

"Normally, you drag your hand across your throat.", X-23 cautioned.

Jean grew even madder. "Normally, I expect people to keep the traumatic family events they learn about through their powers private!"

X-23 looked down. "This is airing dirty laundry?"

Rogue grimaced. "Not quite, but the same neighborhood."

"I need to apologize to Magneto."

Tabitha stepped in. "No, no, no. If he finds out, he will kill you. Xavier and surrender or no Xavier."

X-23 scoffed. "I can't be killed."

"Even when he rips your very metal bones out, stabs you into mush with them, and runs a hundred thousand volts through two hundred and six now lightning rods until he's good and tired of it?", Rogue asked.

"Huh.", X-23 considered. She returned to Beast's talon that she began quietly working on. "Huh."

"I hate to say it, but does anyone want the memory plucked?", Jean offered. "I mean, we're all immediately sworn to secrecy on this. But if Mr. Lensherr finds out..."

"I actually can't.", Rogue lamented. "Lord knows I don't want to get on that man's bad side for personal reasons after seeing what he can bring himself to do because of ideological ones. But this noggin is in deep enough trouble without anyone going around messing with it."

"My programming might make that a difficult proposition as well.", X-23 admitted. "And I'll have to remember not to blurt it out the next time I learn it. So no from me as well."

"We can keep a secret.", Kitty said. "After all, it was the Brotherhood that outed us. And Dr. McCoy's does like, doctor patient confidentiality all the time."

"With that settled, what do you suggest for our date, Paige?", Rogue asked.

"I don't know. Is the carnival back in town?", she replied.

"And put the pressure on Todd to win each of us something at games he knows are rigged better than us but can't tell us without looking like he's trying to talk his way out of it while everyone accuses him of cheating by using powers that are more in their own heads than in his genes?", Rogue explained. "uh, no, shug."

"A walk down by the creek?"

Rogue frowned. "I think he'd take that as a step too far for a first date."

"Dang.", Paige lamented. "Back on the farm, I was good at catching toads down by the creek."

"Groan, Guthrie.", Jubilee told her.