Cheeriosity
Characters/Pairings: Sue, Brittany/Santana, Sugar, Quinn/Jesse, Beth, Rachel, Harmony, Mercedes/Sam, Aphasia, Kurt, Rory
Summary: Sue Sylvester didn't become the biggest name in the dance world by going easy on her students, but now that some of her former stars have enrolled their kids in her class, the shit's about to hit the fan.
A/N: I have ADD or something because this is totally not what I was going to work on next.

It's the morning of the competition and the group should've left thirty minutes ago, yet Rachel is nowhere to be found so all they can do is wait—which has never been one of Sugar's strong suits.

"Can't you ride with me?" Sugar pleads with her mama in the studio parking lot.

"Sorry, sweet pea; Coach Sue won't let me step foot on that bus. She threatened to shoot me out of a cannon if I did," Brittany tells her. She's used to Sugar's endless barrage of questions, but that doesn't stop her from wishing Rachel would hurry up. "I'll still see you compete, Sug. I wouldn't miss it for the world. I just have to drive myself there."

"But Mami always falls asleep and I always get stuck by the window."

"That's because we're always up late the night before… packing our suitcases."

"If you had at least bought me that iPod like I asked, I wouldn't have to listen to her snore all the way to Chicago."

Brittany considers it for a moment. Her wife has a tendency to spoil their daughter, but she will absolutely not cave in… yet. "Maybe for your birthday, but for now you're just going to have to deal with the snoring."

"But my birthday's three months away! That's…" Sugar counts in her head. "At least six more competitions!"

"Fine," Brittany says. "If your solo routine places in the top three, I'll get you that iPod. But under no circumstances can you tell Mami."

Sugar holds out her pinkie finger. "Make it an iPad and you've got yourself a deal."

On the other side of the parking lot, Aphasia is about to have a meltdown. "Why I gotta share a hotel room with him?" she says about her stepfather, Sam. "If people see us together, they gonna think he kidnapped me. It's happened before."

"Because you were screaming, He's kidnappin' me! He's kidnappin' me!" Mercedes recounts, flailing her arms. "Then I had to explain to the police that it was just a misunderstanding."

"They should've gone all SVU on his ass," Aphasia sulks.

"Look, Sam's part of our family now whether you like it or not, but I won't force you to share a room with him. That's why I booked y'all a suite. Give him a chance, Aphasia. He would never do anything to hurt you."

Aphasia glances over her shoulder where Sam is chatting with her Auntie Tana. "Fine, but you let him know that this ain't no video game. He only gets one chance."

"Always waiting on Rachel," Santana murmurs. She has one hand in her pocket while the other holds her morning cigarette. "Y'know, for a fucking perfectionist, you'd think she'd be here before any of us."

Sam shivers. "At least Harmony's here. If we leave now, we'll still have time to eat before we check in for the competition."

"But then Rachel will have to ride in Brittany's car," Santana says.

"What's wrong with that?"

Santana snorts. "Are you kidding me? Brittany hates that woman even more than I do."

Before she can go into greater detail, Sugar tugs at her sleeve. "I want coffee."

"You know the rules. No coffee until just before you go on stage," Santana reminds her. "If you drink some now, you'll crash before we even get to Cook County."

"What if I get a Dunkaccino from over there? It's half coffee, half hot chocolate," Sugar says, pointing to the Dunkin Donuts across the street.

"That sounds disgusting. Get me one too," Santana says as she hands her daughter a twenty dollar bill. "Use the crosswalk and take a buddy." Then she adds, "And Sugar Britches? I want my change."

Sugar shrugs. "I make no promises," she says sassily before prancing off to find Rory.

"Can I ask you something?" Sam asks Santana and she can tell just from the troubled look on his face where this conversation is headed. "She…" He struggles to voice his concern. "She doesn't hold it against you that you didn't… you know… give birth to her, does she?"

"I am and always have been Sugar's Mami," Santana says. "And just because you're not Aphasia's father doesn't mean you can't be a good parent to her. Personally, I think you should just lay down the law."

"Like you do with Sugar?" Sam jokes.

Santana flicks her cigarette butt at him.

"Did you put your bags on the bus, kiddo?" Quinn asks, placing her hand on Beth's shoulder. She quickly retracts it when she sees her daughter is on the phone.

"Sorry," Beth apologizes once she hangs up, "Daddy was telling me to break a leg."

"Oh, it's fine," Quinn recovers. "You haven't seen Rachel—I mean, Ms. Berry yet, have you?"

"No, but Harmony says she doesn't get home some mornings until right before school."

For a moment, Quinn's heart stops. "So Harmony's home alone those nights?"

"Her grandpas always come over. They just couldn't watch her last night," Beth explains.

"Good," Quinn breathes out. "That's good."

"Any sign of your mom yet, Melody?" Sue barks at Harmony.

"She'll be here," Harmony says unconvincingly.

Sue squints. "In the meantime, entertain me."

"Okay!" Harmony agrees. "Would you like me to sing or dance? Or both?"

"None of the above," Sue says. "I want you to gnaw on this comically large carrot like Bugs Bunny."

Harmony's eyes light up at the suggestion. "An acting exercise! Why didn't I think of that?" She slips into character. "What's up, doc?"

Sue smiles in spite of herself. "Yeah, yeah, yeah. Less yappin' and more snappin'."

Thirty more minutes pass and there's still no sign of Rachel.

"We need to get going," Sue announces to the group. "Everybody on the bus."

Although she tries not to show it, Harmony's starting to panic when Quinn steps in to comfort her.

"She's never this late," Harmony says as tears begin to form in her eyes.

Quinn only holds her tighter. "Maybe they really needed her at work."

"Maybe," Harmony whispers, "but I need her more."

Santana watches as Quinn leads Harmony onto the bus and she pulls her wife aside. "It pains me to do this, Britt, but I think you need to wait here for Rachel."

To her surprise, Brittany nods. "It's a boring trip alone, anyway." She kisses her wife and daughter goodbye. "See you in the Windy City."