A./N. Hey! I decided since tomorrow I'll be busy, so I'm giving you all the chapter early! So yay! I hope y'all like it!
Disclaimer: I only own the plot; all things TMI go to Cassandra Clare.
Clary p.o.v.
I was lying on my bed, not doing much of anything when Izzy got there.
"Clary! Oh my God what happened!? What did he do to you!? I'm so soory!"
Izzy was talking so fast I could barely tell what she said.
She quickly ran to my bed and flung herself down next to me, comforting me like a mother comforts a child.
"He-he…" I tried to choke out, without much success.
"Shhh, it's okay, you can tell me." She said.
"He-he said all these me-mean and ho-horrible things about me." I stutter out.
"When, and to whom?" She asks, a little quieter now.
"Se-Sebastian Verlac. They were ta-talking. They didn't he-hear me walking." I say, my shuddering sobs slowing down somewhat.
"I'm so sorry, Sweetie. I'll take that asshole down. Nobody, even Jace, gets to mess with my Clary. I don't care what happened between you two. Nobody gets to say bad things about my best friend." Izzy says, her tone firm.
I just nod, not trusting my voice.
Izzy stayed for two hours, until I was calmed down. She wanted to spend the night, but I wouldn't let her, she had her own things to do.
"If you need me to come back, just call. You know I will." She said.
"I'll be fine Iz, don't worry. I'll see you tomorrow." I tried to smile, though she knew it was forced.
She just hugged me again then left, as quietly as Izzy can.
I went back and lied down on my bed, knowing that I wouldn't be able to fall asleep until when I usually do; even though I'm exhausted.
My mom came into my room a couple minutes later, knocking softly.
"Clary, are you alright, honey?" She asked quietly.
"Not really, but I will be." I said back, not wanting to lie, but not wanting to tell her everything, either.
"Okay, Luke and I are just in the next room, if you need us." She replied.
"Okay, love you, Mom." I say.
"Love you too, Clare Bear." She smiled then left, closing my door quietly.
I just lied back down, staring at my ceiling, the glow in the dark stars not yet glowing, as it was still light outside.
I thought of all the things that had happened in the last few weeks. My life had gone from normal, to amazing, to awful, to not really anything.
Nobody had ever called me those names before; I didn't really stick out enough to be bullied. I wasn't "easy", like Jace had said, I've slept with one guy, him. If anything, he was the whore. I'm sure he's slept with half the girls in our school, maybe more. It's astounding how he hasn't gotten an STD yet. Oh God, what if he has!? We didn't use a condom!
Woahwoahwoah, Clary! Slow down! You would have known if he did. Izzy would have said something. And if he had one, and just didn't tell anyone, then by now he would have gotten it cured, he has the money.
I just nod to myself, trying to calm down.
I just don't understand. I thought we did have a "thing". We definitely weren't "just friends". So why would he try and lie to Sebastian of all people. Sebastian knows everything. He knows it without hearing about it, he's just like that.
I just shake my head, knowing that I'll never figure him out. He's Jace, I was barely even able to break one brick in his wall he put up around himself. Obviously he thought that it was better everyone didn't know. That saying I was a slut who just was good for sex was easier than letting his ego and ranking in the popular scale be hurt. He'll have some new bimbo on his arm by tomorrow, and I'll just become Clary again. His annoying sisters best friend. He'll act like he doesn't remember that night, or any of the nights. Because he's Jace Herondale, Womanizer Player 3000. He got what he wanted, and now it's time to move on.
So I won't get in his way.
I'll pretend nothing's wrong, nothing ever happened between us. I might even try and find a date for Homecoming. Yeah, Jace Herondale wants to forget, I'll forget right along with him.
I just smile to myself, despite the emotions still raging inside of me.
My smile drops when my phone rings, I don't even have to look at it to know it's him.
"What?" I say.
"Clary! Oh thank God you answered. Listen I-"
"It's fine, Jace. If you want to forget what we had, I won't stop you. We'll go back to how we were, like nothing ever happened. I'll see you tomorrow." I say, cutting him off and hanging up before he could answer.
Surprisingly, I start crying again. It doesn't matter that he was calling to end it, I did it first. I crushed the hope at hearing his relieved voice before it could take off. I tore the wings off the angel, and felt the agony of the victim, instead of the rush of power of the executioner.
My head started pounding and the room was spinning. My stomach was churning dangerously, and I knew what was next. I ran to the bathroom and just made it before I started heaving. My whole body ached with each wave, and I felt like I was going to shrivel up and die.
Why did it hurt so bad? We weren't anything to begin with. We had feelings, yes, but it wasn't like I'm in love with him or anything. That would be insane.
I sigh and shudder when it stops, my face covered in a light sheen of sweat from the effort. I close the lid, flush, and wipe the back of my hand across my mouth.
I just lay my head on the lid, not having the strength to get up yet.
My mom comes in soon after, her face a mask of worry.
"Honey, what happened? Are you alright? Do you feel well? Should we go to the hospital? She's quietly ratting off questions, much like Isabelle was.
"I threw up, not really, not really, and no." I say.
Her lips press into a thin line. She says, "Can you stand up on your own?"
"I don't think so." I say back, closing my eyes.
I'm so tired and it's only 7:30.
She just nods then leaves the room for a minute. Luke comes back with her, scoops me up after letting me brush my teeth, and carries me back to my room; his familiar scent calming me.
He sets me down, giving me some pjs, then kisses my forehead and hugs me. My mom does the same. They tell me they love me and close my door.
I get changed, as fast as I can while not having any strength. Once I do, I burrow in my covers, and fall asleep before my head hits the pillow.
I'm woken up for a minute some time later, by voices.
I can hear my parents, and someone else. I don't really know or care who it is, and quickly roll over and fall back asleep.
I wake up sometime the next morning, I look at my clock to see it's 10:30.
Wow, I must have been really tired.
Then I remember that it's Thursday, and I have school.
Crap!
In my scramble to get out of bed I get tangled in my covers and end up falling off, my body tangled in fluffy blankets.
My mom must have heard the thud as I hit the floor, because she comes rushing into my room, dressed how she always is during the day.
"Clary! Are you alright!? I heard something hit the floor." She says, worried.
"Yeah, yeah I'm okay, I tried to get out of bed because of school, and I got tangled. Oh my God, school! I'm late!" I say, my voice hoarse and dry.
My mom walks over to me, helping get me out, then says, "Sweetheart, it's okay. Luke and I called you in sick today; because you seemed in no shape whatsoever for school. You've been out cold since last night, I've been checking on you every hour since I woke up to make sure you weren't dead. You were sick last night, and then seemed like you could barely stay awake long enough to give one word answers. Luke left two hours ago, though he wanted to stay, but I didn't let him." She smiles at me, the fixes my bed and helps me back on it.
I'm surprised I didn't wake up. I'm not the heaviest sleeper in the world. I usually wake up if someone talks too loud in the other room.
I faintly remember waking up last night, but I don't remember anything else, so I just forget it. Whatever it was, it isn't important.
She asks me if I want any breakfast, and I decline. I'm not hungry yet, though I will be later. She says okay and leaves, keeping my door cracked open.
I grab my sketchbook, wanting nothing else than to lose myself in my art.
Jace doesn't cross my mind once.
Near lunch time, I've eaten, showered, hair brushed, clothed, and reading a book when I get a call from Izzy. It must be lunch at school.
"Clarissa Adele Fray! Where the HELL are you!?" She yells through the phone.
"Jezz, Izzy, calm down. I'm at home, my parents let me stay home from school because I felt and looked like shit. I threw up, and then slept for fifteen hours." I say.
"Oh. Well, you could have informed me! I've been worried sick!" Her voice a lot calmer now.
"Well, sorry, but I haven't been thinking about really anything." I say.
She huffs out a breath then says, "Clary, what did you say to Jace last night? He won't come out of his room, and wouldn't come to school today. Whatever happened, he isn't doing well." She says, her voiced hushed and worried.
"I didn't say anything he wasn't thinking." I tell her, my voice still strong even though I get a bad feeling in my stomach.
"Clary, do you know what happened after you left? Jace saw your car, and knew you'd heard him. He didn't even mean any of it. He was going to go and apologize to you but didn't get the chance…" I can hear her going on but the phone has already slipped from my grasp, I don't register it hitting the floor, or her voice calling my name.
The last thing I see is my mom coming into the living room, and her rushing forward before everything goes black.
A./N. MWUAHHAHAHAHAH! YAY DRAMA! I hope y'all liked it! I've noticed with weekly updates, I get A BUNCH of views the first day, and then it's really low for the rest of the week. Ah, well, as long as everyone likes it! Rate/review/favorite/follow! Oh! And when Izzy comes over, she doesn't tell Clary about Jace, because she's expecting him to do it on his own. She's just there to comfort Clary.
Always,
Mari