The Only Exception
"I became insane, with long intervals of horrible sanity."―Edgar Allan Poe
"Betelgeuse."
He cracked open an eye.
"Betelgeuse."
Whoa now, what was this?
"Betelgeuse!"
He rolled out of bed...and onto the hardwood floor of the Deetz house living room. "A warning would be helpful, babes."
She was sitting on the chair near the fireplace, wrapped in an old afghan and sipping something that was steaming from a mug. It wasn't coffee, he could smell that much. Hot chocolate?
Betelgeuse pulled himself to his feet and righted his tie. He glanced around awkwardly before deciding to settle into the couch across from her. "So, what's the occasion, babe?"
She stared down at her cup, hair falling to frame her face. "No reason, really. Just felt like chatting, is all." She didn't have to justify herself to him. She'd spent nearly the entire day slaving over her laptop and nailing down what she'd finally started writing. The character profiles were finished and she was setting up a plot outline. So sue her for only having a glowing screen as company most of the day. She'd never admit it to his face, but she'd gotten a bit lonely and Betelgeuse was a last resort, but a resort nonetheless.
"Chatting?" he scoffed. "Now you want to chat?"
"I'd like to call a truce," she spoke up, lifting her head. "For real this time. Seeing as we're both stuck here together for awhile we might as well get along."
He grinned. "How well do you wanna get along?"
She grimaced. "You're gonna have to work on that pervert stuff. This girl does not appreciate 'your charms' one bit."
"Can't turn off the juice babes. No can do."
"If you want out more often, you'll find a way," she told him. It was amusing to watch his face slacken in confusion, then see his eyes widen in surprise and finally narrow in suspicion. He leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees.
"What do you mean, more often?" he asked lowly.
"Exactly that," she retorted. "You behave and keep your hands to yourself, and I'll say the B-words every now and then."
Betelgeuse leveled with her now. "You're gonna have to be a bit more specific or I'm not agreeing to anything."
Autumn set her feet down onto the floor and threw back the last of the liquid in her cup before answering him. "When I'm around and not frightfully busy, I'll let you out to wander around and do...whatever," when she saw him about to speak, she clarified. "within the confines of the house!"
"What?!" he cried. "What if I wanna go outside and take a walk?"
She scoffed loudly, "Take a walk? Please...you mean terrorize all of Winter River."
Betelgeuse settled back more comfortably into the couch, shifting the cushions around a bit. It wasn't as hard and bulky as it looked. Guess the Maitland's had decent taste when it came to picking up furniture. He looked back up at the girl in front of him, grinning.
"Come on, you don't like 'em any more than I do."
She grinned. "They're growing on me, actually. I've gotten quite fond of this little diner downtown. Haven't checked out the mini-mall yet though."
"They got a mall these days?" he interjected. "See, I need to get out more."
"And I need a beer, if I'm gonna deal with you any longer," she grinned. "Want one?"
He matched her grin and rose from the couch to follow her into the kitchen.
She'd spent a good portion of the evening grilling him on events from the past that he really didn't feel like talking about. However, he was out and they were comfortably settled in the living room.
Her hair had come undone sometime throughout the afternoon and her cheeks were tinted red from all her drinking. She was giggly and loose, so he decided maybe now was a good time to make his move. He slid closer to her and casually slung an arm around her shoulders.
"And then I zapped round boy into a really snazzy pastel suit. Looked good on 'im," Betelgeuse sneered, fondly recalling those last few enjoyable moments before the sandworm chowed down on his moldy ass.
"I only met Otho once," she admitted, making a mental note to remove Betelgeuse's arm from around her person as soon as her body would cooperate. Instead, she found herself taking another swig of beer. She felt woozy and light-headed. She also knew that Betelgeuse was way too close for comfort. "I didn't really like him."
"Yeah," the poltergeist agreed. "He was no fun, didn't stick around for the wedding. Schmuck."
"Did you really even like my cousin?" Autumn wondered aloud. "Or was it just a spur of the moment decision on your part?"
"Jealous, babes?" he quirked an eyebrow at her.
She pushed herself up and away from him. "Of course not! Like I'd want to marry someone...something like...like...you!"
He drew on the most hurt expression he could muster and clutched at where his still heart sat in his chest. "That hurts, babe. I ain't all bad!"
Autumn focused on him once more and really looked. His eyes were extremely green, they almost mesmerizing. The more she looked, the greener they became. For his part, Betelgeuse was rather confounded. The woman was just staring at him and he was having a hard time looking away. And what was with that look on her face?
"No," she smiled then. "You're not all bad." And then she passed out. He sighed. Now what should he do? His sole source of entertainment these days was lying despondently against the couch. He scooted to the edge of the cushion and drummed his fingers on his knee. Well, that was strange.
"S'pose I could poke around in her underwear drawer," he chuckled. He pulled a lit cigarette out of thin air and puffed away at it, anticipating the hour she'd finally wake back up. He wasn't supposed to leave the house or anything...
Wait a blasted minute? He'd never really agreed to anything, had he? And now she was down the count and he was still out, wasn't he? Well damned if this bored stiff (pardon the pun) poltergeist couldn't go anywhere or do anything he pleased. No one could stop him. She was the only one who knew his name around these parts and she was in no position to start spouting it either.
He glanced pensively at his unexpected "keeper". What she didn't know..., as the saying went. With renewed vigor, he sprang up and strode to the door. Betelgeuse could easily phase right into the heart of town and beyond if he wanted, but this was his first unchaperoned outing in a long time and he felt the need to stretch his ghostly legs. So he quietly strolled through Winter River, comparing Adam's model in the attic with the real deal. It seemed that a lot had changed in the past decade or so.
No house of ill-repute though. That was a bummer. He'd been a bit tense lately and could sure use a release. His keeper was nigh unresponsive to his advances, wise to his tricks as she was. Still...
His gaze wandered over to Sally's 24/7 Diner and he flicked the cigarette away. The smoldering ash fizzled out as a booted foot crunched over it. So this was Autumn's little hangout, was it? Maybe he could spook some of the after-hours crew. She'd be pissed if she found out, he cackled darkly. How to do it though – possession? Light tricks? Snakes? Well, couldn't hurt to stroll in and take stock of the place, at least.
The little bell overheard jangled as he opened the door. The place was dimly lit and all of the red vinyl booths were broken or tattered. A dusty jukebox sat in the corner near the restrooms and a bunch of teenagers commandeered the bar stools. Perfect.
Betelgeuse slid into a booth near the door (good view of the joint!) and waved an exhausted looking waitress over.
"What can I get you?" she stifled a yawn.
Just coffee, Susan dear," he drawled, sparing a look at her name tag. "You look like you could use some."
She glanced over her shoulder at the rowdy group of youths. "No kidding."
"Don't like kids much, huh?" he started fiddling with the napkin dispenser. "I don't care for 'em myself, really. Too much trouble."
Susan smiled. "Got any of your own?"
"Ha, no way babes," Betelgeuse guffawed. "M'not exactly the family type, you know what I mean?"
She nodded. "Yes, I know what you mean. I'll be right back with that coffee."
He sat back, toying with a piece of paper in his pocket. Well, it wasn't paper so much as a scribbled on napkin. He'd filched it the first night she let him out and she never even noticed it was gone. What a great distraction he was turning out to be!
Anyways, the napkin contained the bare components of a story plot and some rough character outlines, one of which he easily recognized as Susan – a haggard waitress waiting for life to happen. The other one made him furrow his brow – a mysterious and crude creature who makes an appearance before the waitress and whisks her away into some crazy adventure. Certainly she hadn't been thinking of him and there's no way she could have known he'd make his way here. It had to be a coincidence, of course.
Still, his eyes slid in the direction of the approaching Susan, who was skirting the group of teens anxiously. He had no plans regarding this woman or her life. If there was anyone in this lazy town who warranted a Betelgeuse styled adventure, it was the slumbering form in the house on the hill.
"Thanks, Susan," he smirked as she gingerly set the coffee down before him.
"No problem," she yawned again and meandered back into the kitchen. Well, it wasn't an adventure but the juices were flowing freely and he was itching to let loose.
With barely a twitch of his fingers, the light-bulb in the fixture hanging above the kids exploded. Two of the girls yelped and one of the boys cursed. It was a start. Next came the spiders, big hairy ones crawling out from under plates and behind classes. Oh, there was screaming now. Betelgeuse leaned back into the booth, smiling openly now and exposing his gnarly teeth.
The youngsters made to flee but as soon as they set foot on the tile floor, snakes slithered over them. It only took a few more seconds and some fancy footwork before the bell jangled once more. Susan stood at the kitchen's threshold, gaping at him. He winked before disappearing into thin air, leaving all the teenager's wallets behind on the table.
Don't say he never did nothing for nobody.
The sun was coming up over the horizon when he finally reached the top of the hill. He stood on the porch and watched it for a while, another cigarette dangling from the corner of his mouth. The sun's ray were probably warm in the chilled air of late November, but he couldn't feel it. He didn't even really notice the cold either or the fact that snow flakes were starting to swirl around him.
He didn't even notice that Autumn had joined him on the porch, clad in only a pair of jeans and a long black cardigan, until she spoke. "It's snowing."
Betelgeuse didn't want to admit that she'd surprised him, but he did jump a bit. Startled, that was the word. He looked down at her, the way the morning sun lit up her porcelain skin and reflected in her dark eyes. He wasn't sappy or poetic, but she looked beautiful to him in that moment. Almost inhuman.
And then she turned to look up at him and he was doomed. He couldn't help himself. Betelgeuse spit his cigarette away and kissed her.