Chapter 3

Hey guys! Sorry for the delay; I had exams and a bit of a writer's block. It sucks! Some of you said that you missed Bartimaeus' sarcasm, so I will try to fix that. Apologies if he's a bit out of character. It was actually really fun to make him mischievous! xx

BARTIMAEUS

Two things had changed since I had been pulled back to the Other Place after the Crystal Palace incident.

First of all, I now understood all those damned emotions, thoughts and feelings I had experienced after Nathaniel had dismissed me, kicking and screaming, to the Other Place. They were now so clear, so obvious to me that I felt a fool for not understanding them before. There were no other explanations. I was deeply in love with Nathaniel.

Secondly, those feelings had practically doubled. I now felt more relieved, happier, angrier, more everything! It was like someone had amplified my ability to feel emotions. They now almost completely controlled my words, my actions, my thoughts. It was quite scary, really.

I was sitting awkwardly on a long, thick branch in a tree in a nearby park thinking, pondering, mulling over it all. I really needed that; a long time to think. It gave me a break. It helped me understand things, helped me to answer my questions. Most of all, it helped me to calm down, since I had been anything but calm the past day or so. My essence was sore from being constantly stimulated in so many different ways. If I'd had a heart, I would have probably suffered a heart attack by now.

Dawn was steadily approaching. A golden glow was cast over the London. Birds were chirruping happily in the nearby trees. I didn't feel their glee. I was angry at myself for running away. Again. No wonder the kid suspected so much; I was acting like a girl in middle school running away, blushing like crazy, from her crush. Except this was worse. Nathaniel was not my crush; he was my love.

I angrily kicked out at the branch opposite. This wasn't fair. I had never – not once – in my entire existence heard of a djinni falling for a human (there was the occasional human that fell for a djinni – honestly, who could blame them – but never the opposite). The phrase 'there's a first time for everything' came to mind. Why did I have to be the 'first time' for a djinni to love a human? Why me? What had I done to deserve this? Why couldn't I have regular spirit problems?

There was one big question that I hadn't answered yet. I'd been so caught up with sorting out my own feelings that I hadn't stopped to consider Nathaniel's. Why did he care if I loved him or not? He surely didn't...love me?

I hissed disapprovingly at the hope that had emerged at that last thought. Of course Nathaniel didn't love me. He was just trying to find out whether or not it was safe for him and his job to keep me around. That's all he cared about.

What really got me is how I was reacting to this whole affair. I certainly wasn't acting how I should have been; like a mature, wise djinni. No, I was acting in denial. The way I had succumbed to my feelings by kissing him really wasn't what I should be doing, even if I wanted to. What I should be doing is trying to return to the Other Place, ignoring my feelings and ignoring Nathaniel.

This whole emotion – love – really was new to me. I had never experienced love like this before; I had loved Ptolemy like one would love a friend, a family member. I had never felt such feelings towards Ptolemy, the only human in my existence who had ever treated me with respect and friendship. I certainly never had felt this kind of love for anyone...until now.

It wasn't as if I was unfamiliar with the actual act of intercourse – I have had my share or rather promiscuous masters who abused the power of enslaving spirits. In fact, I had plenty of experience in that area; I would consider myself an expert. However, making love was different; I was inexperienced with the intimacy, the vulnerability, the trust. I didn't know if my essence could handle so much at once. Spirits are able to feel physical pleasure just as much as humans; however, the type of pleasure spirits respond most to is emotional pleasure.

"Stop it!" I growled angrily, clenching the branch I was sitting on. "What are you doing!?" This definitely wasn't what I ought to be thinking about right now since I was, at this moment, continuously thinking about Nathaniel, so pondering whether or not I am capable of making love certainly wasn't going to help me. At all. It would only make my inner turmoil worse. Much worse. Those kinds of thoughts, undoubtedly, would lead on to other not so pure thoughts. "It would never happen anyway," I told myself bitterly. "So stop wishing."

However, the subject got me thinking. If Nathaniel, by some miraculous chance did love me, and wanted something more, would I comply? I seriously needed to get all my thoughts and feelings sorted, so why not ask the inevitable questions now?

Did I love Nathaniel? "Yes." I muttered. Did I want something more? "...Yes."

The air was getting warmer as the sun rose. I guessed it must be around six in the morning. It was still too early to see any citizens out and about. The boy wouldn't need me until a couple of hours...I hoped. I wasn't ready to face him again. I had probably given too much away already. But I couldn't stay here all day. With the feeling of accumulating dread, I dropped down from the tree, landing on the soft grass below. Swiftly turning into a - beautiful, I must say - robin, I took flight, slowly making my way to the boy's apartment, taking my time on purpose. When I landed quietly on his window, I took a moment to gather myself before fluttering in and changing into Ptolemy. Shutting the window behind me, I turned around. It wasn't early enough for the sun to be a bright light; it cast a gentle glow on the room.

The first thing I noticed was that Nathaniel wasn't in his bed; it was neatly made. I heard the shower running in the bathroom which joined his room. Singing was coming from the bathroom; in all truth, it sounded more like it was coming from a diseased horse than a human. I resisted the urge to march right up to the door and smash my fist through it to make him shut up. Instead I settled myself in the big puffy armchair in the corner of the room, watching the bathroom door, waiting for Nathaniel to come walking out.

I told myself to act completely normal; cracking jokes, being sarcastic etc. I had to do my best to convince him that I did not love him. He must not know; the last thing I needed right now was to know that I loved him. I was to act like I would normally do in other circumstances, being sarcastic and a bit of a prick.

Hopefully I would also be able to make myself forget my feelings for him.

When Nathaniel finally did emerge with a bathrobe on, he jumped when he saw me.

"Bartimaeus!" he squeaked, desperately pulling the robe tighter around himself. "What are you doing here?" He demanded, scowling at me. I don't like to admit it, but the sight of him in a bathrobe made me feel odd. Not odd in a bad way. No, odd in a...strangely good way. I pushed down the feeling, trying to ignore it. Instead, I winked at him, smirking mischeviously.

"Did it slip your pretty little mind that you didn't actually dismiss me?" He frowned at me.

"No, of course not." He said, shaking his head. "What I meant was what are you doing waiting for me?" Not really wanting to answer that question – as I'm sure he wouldn't like the answer – I yawned loudly and rolled onto my back, looking at him upside down.

"You look so much better upside down, you know? Your hair looks far less abnormal this way." He grimaced at this, subconsciously running his hands through his hair.

"Don't be so immature!" He snapped, stamping his foot angrily. Then he scurried across the room to his drawers, grabbing a handful of clothes.

"Don't worry; I won't look!" I said as if I was talking to a little kid. But I continued to watch him, a smile playing at my lips. This was fun!

"No way! I am not getting changed with you in the room," he growled, giving me a hateful stare.

As I watched him from my upside down position on the armchair, an idea came to me. I guess that somehow this plan made perfect sense in my head; it wasn't the best of my ideas, but still pretty darn good. Its purpose was to once and for all convince Nathaniel that I didn't love him. It didn't quite fit in the 'not strange' category. It wasn't exactly what you would call... acceptable...

I was going to attempt to scare him by acting in a way which he would find repulsive; basically, I was going to make him extremely uncomfortable by making sexual comments and acting in a slightly...demonic way – if you catch my drift. Then after repulsing him, I would point at his face and laugh, saying how it was all a joke. I wasn't sure how, but I hoped it would cause him to get off my back once and for all. Now, it would probably be hard for me to say things like that to him without exerting a lot of self control to keep me from going too far. No, going too far would just have the opposite effect.

Nathaniel turned and as if to make his way the bathroom...but then he stopped. He turned his face towards me. His blue eyes met mine, and I gazed into his soul, not wanting to tear my gaze away. He looked calculating, cautious. I couldn't help it; the smile on my face was growing with every passing moment.

"Pity."

NATHANIEL

In all honesty, I wasn't in the best of moods this morning. I had woken early, tired and slightly confused about last night's events. I don't know why the spirit had tried to hide the fact that it had kissed me. Nevertheless, I had had enough of these mind games. I was no longer going to try to get it to tell me what it felt, to tell me if it loved me or not. I wasn't even sure myself now. Of course, I was still in love with Bartimaeus – even though I wished it was not the case – but I wasn't going to it that. In fact, I was going to act like nothing out of the ordinary had happened. Despite the pang I felt in my heart, I told myself that that was what this whole thing probably was to the djinni; nothing at all. It was just playing with me.

However, the memories were soon dismissed from my consciousness when I stubbed my toe on the foot of my bed. Next, the shower had been extremely cold. And if that wasn't enough, I had been scared out of my wits by the very being I wanted to avoid. Bartimaeus.

It was acting strangely...but could I really say that? It was acting normal compared to before the Crystal Palace incident, yet it was acting strangely compared to how it had been acting ever since it had been resummoned; cracking jokes, generally being obnoxious – yet its actions seemed oddly forced, strained. False. They seemed unnatural when a year ago it would have been odd for the djinni not to be acting the way it was. Anyway, despite my obvious annoyance, it insisted on getting on my nerves.

Ignoring the demon, I crossed the room quickly, collecting my clothes for the day. I wasn't in the mood to play along.

"Don't worry; I won't look!" I heard the smile in its voice. I peeked at the entity out of the corner of my eyes. It was still surveying me from upside down; a small smile was on its face, but an odd emotion was shining in its eyes. What was with the spirit? The copper gaze sent shivers down my spine – as it often did. Trying to ignore them, I growled.

"No way! I am not getting changed with you in the room," I gathered all my clothes up in a bundle, preparing to dash back to the bathroom. However, something made me stop. Bartimaeus had not replied as I had been expecting. I sneaked a peak. The look on its face was honestly terrifying. On the surface, it looked like a mischievous stare. But I knew Bartimaeus well; behind the mask, an unrestricted desperation glowed. Then, a smile slowly crept its way across the demon's face which made my heart skip a beat with fear.

"Pity."

The demon's playful actions suddenly seemed intimidating. Ever so slowly, almost like a predator, it rolled over onto its stomach, those copper eyes never leaving mine. Then it stood from the sofa.

I dashed. I just about made it to the bathroom door before Bartimaeus reached the handle. I quickly locked the door, panicking. I knew that Bartimaeus could easily break down the door, locked or not. My heart was pumping fast, my breath coming in short, fast puffs. I backed away from the door, my clothes still bundled in my arms. What had gotten into the djinni?

A long pause. Then, after the door hadn't been bashed down as I had expected, I let out a long breath. Then, before anything else happened, I quickly changed into my clothes. When I had finished, I took my time washing my face and getting ready for the day. I wasn't particularly looking forward to going back into the bedroom – I didn't want to find out what Bartimaeus had had in mind. I looked at myself in the bathroom mirror, trying to calm my frenzy of a heartbeat. I met a pale complexion, framed by a slightly red flush on the cheeks. Dark, tired eyes gazed back. I continued to breath deep and slow, preparing myself for going back out there. When I felt as if I was ready, I unlocked the bathroom door as quietly as I could and cautiously poked my head around it.

There was no sign of Bartimaeus. Fortunately. I inspected the room. There weren't any suspicious pieces of furniture or new ornaments in the room. Even so, I still kept my guard up. The spirit could be anywhere. I stepped out and shut the bathroom door behind me, my eyes never leaving the room. Then, I stealthily made my way across the room to my briefcase, snatching it up quickly and holding it to my chest as if it was some sort of armour.

Just then, I felt a short, warm, gentle blast of air on the back of my neck. Did I also here a quiet chuckle? I spun around, neck hair standing on end, scrutinising the room fiercely. The window was open, a gently breeze ruffling the curtains. Was I just imagining things now? Furrowing my brows, I looked around. Still no sign of that blasted spirit.

I took a cautious step forward, still observing my surroundings. I was expecting Bartimaeus to come leaping out at me from under the bed or from behind the chairs, hoping to scare me. But it didn't. And that was making me feel uneasy. I continued my way to the door.

Just then, I heard my closet door creeeaaak open. I turned instantly, glaring at the door. It gently swung open. Putting down my briefcase, I walked over to the door. I looked inside the closet to see if anything in there had been pushing on the closet door, causing it to open. Nothing. I was about to close the door when I felt warm the hairs on the back of my neck standing even more straight. A tingling sensation made its way down my body. I twisted around. Then I backed up against the closet, letting out a small gasp of shock.

Bartimaeus was standing in front of me. Close in front of me. Too close. Far too close.

It was staring right into my eyes, its forehead only millimetres from mine. I felt like it was reading my mind. I remained tense, frozen at the proximity of the spirit. I could smell the scent of dust, of old books coming from the demon. I also got a faint whiff of spices. The proximity was making my heart beat rise.

The spirit gazed at me, copper eyes searching my face, a smile tugging at the ends of its mouth. I gazed back, too shocked to move. Then Bartimaeus' mischievous smile grew a fraction, and I caught sight of white teeth.

Bartimaeus stepped in closer. I leaned back, pressing myself harder against the closet. My breath was coming out faster and shallower. I couldn't ignore how close the demon was. There were only a couple of inches between us now. Any further and we would be pressed up against each other. It was getting harder to breathe. Bartimaeus leaned further forward until our chests were gently touching. And he stayed there, still surveying me. I felt my breath hitch in my throat. I felt slightly faint, my heart hammering against my chest, its rate getting faster and faster with each passing minute.

Bartimaeus slowly moved hand to touch my arm, its eyes still locked with mine. I felt a blush forming on my cheeks as the hand caressed my lower arm. Embarrassed, I screwed my eyes shut and turned my face away from Bartimaeus', trying to stop my body from reacting the way it was. I felt my chest vibrate as the djinni let out a low chuckle.

"Embarrassed, are we?" It purred quietly, continuing to trace patterns on my arm through my shirt. The suggestive tone in its voice caused me to shiver. I felt the djinni press against me a fraction harder. The blush in my cheeks darkened as I let out a tiny gasp.

"N-no..." I mouthed soundlessly, more a desperate plea than an answer. It was, of course, a complete lie. I knew it all too well. And so did Bartimaeus. The feeling of Bartimaeus' form against me was causing my body to react extremely strangely. I knew why, of course. But the djinni had no idea what its touch was doing to me.

"No?" It breathed in my ear, its breath cool and gentle. My heart jumped as the djinni's hand made its way to my shoulders, gently scratching nails across my collar bone. "You don't look too comfortable. Maybe if I–" It dragged its hand unhurriedly down my chest. "–do this." Bartimaeus whispered seductively. I visibly trembled as the hand, little by little, got lower. And lower. Lower it went, past my stomach, past my belt, nearer to my–

"STOP!" I gasped, my eyes snapping open. I grabbed the demon's hand and forced it away from my body, panting hard. I felt tears in my eyes and I stared, breathing heavily, at Bartimaeus. It looked a little shocked, but recovered quickly.

"What's wrong, Natty boy?" It teased. "Afraid of a little bit of fun?" I blinked, still extremely flustered. My brain wasn't functioning properly. I managed to form a coherent sentence in my head.

"W-what w-were..." I trailed off. Bartimaeus was closing the distance between us again.

"Lost for words, Nat?" It smirked. "Cat got–" The djinni licked its lips tantalizingly. "–your tongue?"

That last gesture proved too much. The sight of Bartimaeus licking its lips set my head spinning. I had to get out of here. Flustered beyond control, I shoved my way past Bartimaeus and made a run for the door. The spirit made no move to stop me. It remained where it was, watching me go.

Mind, body and soul in disarray, I ran out of my apartment. Panting hard, heart beating wildly and sweating slightly, I made my way down the flight of stairs, not looking back once.

BARTIMAEUS

I watched the teary eyed boy hurry off, flustered and confused. I was a little uneasy too. My essence was racing through my body, quaking. Nathaniel just didn't know because djinn can't blush. Or cry. Or sweat.

He hadn't reacted in the way I had expected; I thought he was going to get angry instead of embarrassed, try to punch me instead of squeezing his eyes shut. Why? I had felt his heart when our chests had been touching. I could also hear it. It had been beating so fast...

Had I gone too far? I had a sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach that I probably did.

And I could tell I was going to regret it greatly when the boy came home...if he ever did.

What did you guys think? Please leave a review, it would really help me! Next chapter up soon! xx