AN: thank you for the reviews...sorry for the long update but i didn't have a computer...
Chapter 14: Trouble on my mind
When Danny entered his office and saw that letter on his desk he knew something was wrong, he could feel it in his gut and then he opened it and saw Steve's handwriting. It hit him like a ton of bricks-he never saw this coming. The past few weeks had been great-they had two engagement parties;one in Jersey with his parents-that was funit was loud, a lot of family and friends showed up and there was tons of food, Steve had never felt more loved or cherised in his life and it brought him to tears because he hadn't felt that way since his mother died; Danny thought this was so sweet seeing this side of him that they rarely get to see and he enjoyed it. The other party was back in Hawaii-man that was something else-lots of food, a lot of family and friends also attended and they had an amazing time: laughing, talking, slow dancing in each others arms.
Now it seemed like these past few weeks ment nothing to him, just up and leaving a 'Dear Danno' letter for Danny to find and yeah it hurt, cut him deep. But before he could even deal with it they got a case, a case that hit home with Max. Chin knew something was wrong when Danny showed up to the scene without Steve and when Danny answered him about where Steve was he could hear the hurt and and confusion in his voice and it made Chin's heart go out to him but they had this case to deal with first then he'll talk to Danny about it. They closed it and didn't have to make an arrest because Max killed the guy in self-defense.
As Danny was sitting in his car, he called him again for what seemed like the thousandth time that day. He felt hurt and angry and for some reason there was this part of himself that he was blaming himself for not seeing it, not seeing what was going on inside Steve's head. He left another v-mail, "Steven...baby please call us back, call me back. I understand why you're doing this-you need the truth and if I was in the same position I'd possibly do the same thing expect I would certainly tell the person I was going to marry where the hell I was going! I can't get hurt again babe, so please call or even text me to at least let me know you're still alive and breathing-I...I can't bury you. YOU HAVE TO COME BACK IN ONE PIECE AND ALIVE! I'm going to keep calling you until I get an answer Steven Jack McGarrett ya hear me. I'm not giving up this easily. I LOVE YOU AND I'M GOING TO MARRY YOU...YOU IDOIT...OKAY YOU KNOW WHAT YOU MAKE ME SO ANGRY SOMETIMES THAT I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT TO DO WITH YOU BUT EVEN THEN I STILL LOVE YOU AND I STILL LET YOU KNOW WHERE I AM! NOW CALL ME BACK!"
Danny slammed the phone shut and threw it in the passenger seat as he hit the steering wheel over and over and finally let out a gutterial scream. He rested his head against the steering wheel until his breathing was even again. He was a complete mess-his hair was messed up, his eyes were red and puffy, he had tear tracks on his cheeks and his knuckles were white from gripping the wheel so tightly. He looked at himself in the mirror and kind of cleaned himself up before leaving the parking lot and going to their home but it didn't feel like home not without the big goof around, it just felt big and empty.
Grabbing a bottle of scotch from the back of the cabinet, Danny headed out to the lenai and sat down in Steve's chair, he just wanted to forget-forget the hurt, pain and anger he was feeling. He knew this wasn't the right answer but right now he could care less, wanted to get extremly wasted and forget about that stupid damn letter and worrying about if Steve was alive or not.
A few hours passed Chin was getting worried because now he couldn't get a hold of Danny. He knew this affected him harder than anyone else. Yeah he was coping and Kono was just going to surf it out, he didn't like the way he just up and left them like that but he knew that this was something he had to do on his own. Driving up the McGarret-Williams place, he noticed no lights were on but Danny's car was there so figured he must be out back on the lenai.
"Heyyyyy Chin..." Danny slurred out. Chin just shook his head because he knew that Danny was completely wasted as he sat down beside him.
"Hey brah...so-'nnnnoooooo...not gonna talk about it...idoit just ups and leaves me and taking my heart with him...well fine...so lonnnnnggg McGarrett...never want to see you again'
Chin sighed knowing this was the Sctoch talking. "Okay Daniel...I think you've had enough...come on lets get you to bed."
"Fine...take aaddvantage of me, IIII don't care anymore"
Ignoring that last comment from him, Chin takes the now empty bottle from him and helps him up in which Danny leans against him, "Hmmm you smmmmelll good babe"
Chin stops in his tracks and takes Danny by the shoulders, "Daniel look at me...are you trying to make a pass at me?"
Danny smiles, "Nooooo Chin...if I wanted to make a pass I'd do this-" Before Chin could react Danny was crashing his lips againsit his, needless to say this did surprise Chin but he quickly pulled him off, "DAMMIT DANNY WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?"
Danny's taken aback, "You don't want me?"
Chin rolls his eyes, "I'm married remember?"
"Ohh..haha yeah I uhh forgot..."
"Look Daniel...you are marrying the most wonderful man. Yeah he left but he has to do this on his own, he has to find the truth on his own and hopefully this whole mess will done with when he gets back. Geez Danny...you really need to get your shit together and no we are NOT going to talk about what just happened; if Steve ever found out about what happened, he will possibly kill you and me and our bodies would never be found."
"He wouldn't kill me...I have Gracie and I'd stop him from killing you. Look I'm sorry I did that...I'm a little a drunk"
"A little?" Chin responds with his eyebrows raised
"Okay I'm wasted but still I shouldn't have done that...please forgive me"
"I do brah I do forgive you but you've gotta stop blaming yourself."
Danny bows his head, "I should've known"
"Look at me...you couldn't have known, hell we all didn't know what he was thinking but trust me when I say this-when he's like this, it's a great thing because he has surprise on his side and then the bad guys don't know what hits them so take comfort in that. It's just that he probably felt like he couldn't lead 5-0 with this whole mess hanging around but right now he's laser-focused and he won't stop until he gets the truth. Okay?"
"Okay...you're right...it's just that we were planning on going to LA and see an old Navy SEAL buddy of his-Sam something and drop in on his sister and just spend time with each other. It's just not fair then again life isn't fair so I shouldn't be complaining but I can't help it."
"Yeah I know but if you didn't complain then you wouldn't be Danny."
They both laughed at this as Chin helped him up to his bedroom then went back downstairs and slept on the couch. He felt like Danny needed to be looked after, felt like Steve would want someone to look after Danny while he was away. Just before he fell asleep he sent a prayer up to the heavens to keep Steve safe and alive.
AN: okay I know this is shorter than the others but I needed to get this out espicially after last night...i felt so sorry for danny. he needs a hug.