Chapter 10: The Lonely

I'm so grateful for the mass of reviewers I had last chapter: Rucky, sandiw1875, jessnicole, SittingOnTheEdgeOfTheUniverse, klaroline-maybe1day, chloe. quinn. 96, and freshly caught Cornish pixies.

It was two days after Caroline came home and found out that Bonnie had passed away the night she'd left. It turned out that she had sacrificed herself so that Jeremy could come back to life. Romantic Caroline wished that someday she would be able to love someone enough to die for them. Bonnie's friend Caroline, however, would rather that kind of love not exist than her having to face the rest of her life without her best friend, the girl who she loved like a sister. She wished she could stay in bed and cry for days and days. She had already been feeling awful when she'd left New Orleans but this was a whole different story. This was more than agony; it was despair.

The worst part was that she couldn't wallow in self-pity. She had to be the strong one, the one who took grief with gracious acceptance. She'd been planning a memorial for Bonnie for the last few days. In a way, it was good to be back in her old stomping ground, organising an event and then a reception at the Lockwood House. If only it wasn't this event she was planning.

At the end of a long day of Caroline burying herself in plans, she drove back to the Salvatore Boarding House. She'd decided to not move back into her mother's house and opted to stay with Elena, Jeremy and (regrettably) Damon. It was hard at first for her to so much as look Jeremy in the face after he had purposefully kept Bonnie's death a secret but he wasn't a particularly bad housemate, particularly since he shared her disgust towards Damon and Elena. As for the couple themselves, while she was glad to be there for Elena, it was hard for her to see them with each other. Caroline thought that she'd gotten over their being together, but somehow whenever they started acting couple-y, she found a reason to leave.

Presently, she walked in on the two of them cuddling on the couch. She almost looked away but instead cleared her throat and asked, "Have you managed to contact Stefan yet?"

Damon looked at her as if dumbstruck but proceeded to shake his head and reply, "Sorry."

Caroline pursed her lips. Since his departure, Stefan had been answering a total of zero of their phone calls, texts and emails. Caroline must have left at least a dozen messages telling him about Bonnie's memorial service and still, he was silent.

Caroline was drawn back down to earth as her phone started to vibrate in her pocket. It was Matt. "Hi, Matt!" she said, throwing down her bag and heading for her room. "You're coming to the service Saturday, right?"

"Yeah, of course, I wouldn't miss it, Care."

There was an awkward pause during which Matt failed to explain his motives for calling. Finally, Caroline had to ask exasperatedly, "So, what's up?"

"You're back," Matt stated, as if that explained everything.

"Yeah."

"Why? I mean, why did you leave New-"

Caroline cut him off to hush him. She was all too aware of the presence of two other vampires in the house. She turned on the tap in the en suite bathroom to drown out their conversation. "New Orleans is a bad place filled with really awful people," Caroline testified. "I didn't want to become one of them."

"By 'one of them', you mean Klaus," Matt perceived. He could hear her surprise from the other end and said, "Rebekah talks a lot about her brothers' drama."

"Pretty messed up, huh? I mean, he's the last guy in the world I'd imagine myself going on vacation with, let alone actually living with," Caroline divulged, "and somehow I wanted to. I was happy over there. And then I guess reality caught up with me."

"What happened?" Matt persisted.

"It doesn't matter what happened Matt. Klaus is a bad guy with a lot of baggage and I don't know how to handle that right now. "

"You're Caroline Forbes, hopscotch champion and possibly one of the strongest people I've ever met. You don't have to put up with Klaus and his problems."

"That's true," she replied. "But you don't have to put up with my problems either, and Damon has to put up with Elena's problems and Tyler had to put up with yours. What I'm trying to say is that Klaus and I formed a bond out there and I don't know what to make of it."

Matt took a deep breath. "Speaking of Elena and Damon, when are you going to tell them the truth about New Orleans?"

Caroline immediately jumped to the guilty part of her conscience. While her moving into the Salvatore House had been severely influenced by her mother knowing about her stay in New Orleans, it had been hard to stay without revealing her secret to Elena. That said, it wasn't like she was planning on telling her anything anytime soon. "Would it really be that bad if they didn't know?"

"She has a right to," Matt said. "Besides, I don't like keeping secrets for you."

"After everything between her and Damon, you know she's going to judge me!"

"But isn't it better that she hears it from you instead of from someone who'll make it into something it's not?" he pointed out.

Caroline thought it over for a moment. She couldn't just say no to Matt like that. After all, she didn't have any right to ask him to cover for her. Finally, she said, "Fine, I'll tell them after Bonnie's ceremony."

It was past noon on the same day in New Orleans. Klaus was tossing in bed, trying to convince himself to rise and face the day but coming to the conclusion over and over again that all he would be facing would be the life Caroline Forbes chose to leave behind. He was going to be the father of an illegitimate child, he was controlled by his former protégé and on top of that, he was certain that the sun which had burst into his life last year was now gone for good. Since Elijah had left to settle some business out of town, he'd spent his time between his bed, his studio and his bottle of vodka.

The minute his head left the pillow, his eyes flew instinctively to the spot where him and Caroline had fought and then kissed.

"Did it ever occur to you that I was just thirsty? We're vampires, Caroline, it's what we do."

"No, no, that's not it. I know you, you strike out because you're angry at the world, and most of all because you're hurt. I'm sorry that I hurt you, Klaus, but you can't be mad at me because I'm trying to protect the man that I care for."

Klaus buried his head back into his pillow. Caroline was incessant, or at least, his memories of her were. Unfortunately, Marcel was forcing him to come to a meeting outside of the French Quarter. While it wasn't strictly necessary for him to be there, Marcel liked to show off his control of the Original Hybrid.

Finally, he rolled out of bed and got himself some coffee to cure his searing headache. Twenty minutes later, he was sitting in a conference room talking over new policies for feeding during the day. He was bored out of his mind and almost-subconsciously started to text Caroline under the table:

To: Caroline 3

From: Klaus

If it makes you feel any better, I am being forced to do Marcel's bidding.

A minute later, Caroline fished out her vibrating phone and frowned as she saw that it was from Klaus. Muttering a "Seriously?!", she begrudgingly opened it and couldn't help but laugh when she read its contents. Without stopping to think, she quickly replied.

To: Klaus

From: Caroline

Marcel's new little bitch, huh? If Tyler knew, he'd be laughing!

Caroline instantly regretted having sent the message. It was childish and petty, not to mention that it opened a line of communication between her and Klaus.

Klaus, on his end, was thrilled. This was the third or fourth message he'd sent her that week and it was the only one she'd actually answered.

To: Caroline 3

From: Klaus

The silence is broken.

This was met with total silence. Klaus tried to turn his attention back to the conference but Caroline remained on the back of his mind. He loved her spirit, how she wasn't afraid to challenge him and to defy him. He had an urge to smooth their relationship out again.

Klaus: Come on, love, you can't be mad at me for protecting my family. I kept you out of it so that you wouldn't be involved.

I became involved the minute you kissed me, Caroline texted furiously back. She waited for his answer impatiently. It came rather quickly:

Klaus: Ah! But you kissed me. I was an innocent victim.

Caroline slammed the phone back onto the mattress and pushed her body away from it. She didn't see why Klaus would dare bringing up that day in the woods when they'd technically had their first ever kiss. She turned to go to the bathroom and get into the shower.

"Oh my God, you're Klaus! You're disgusting!"

"And you're a glorious kisser. Listen, I didn't have to risk exposure to come save you."

"Oh, you do one semi-decent thing and now you're my hero? Ugh, I need to go sanitize my mouth!"

"Your mouth was all over me. I was an innocent victim."

"Put Tyler back!"

"Gladly. Then maybe I'll take you up on your offer of hot hybrid sex."

Caroline was hit by a sudden wave of memories from that very day. She'd been disgusted by Klaus then but now she was literally daydreaming about him! Caroline shivered self-consciously and rushed downstairs to join the company of the sane.

Damon and Elena were in the kitchen, cooking some kind of non-vampire meal. They were laughing and Damon had his arms around her. Caroline looked at them weird. The vampires in the house were kept pretty well fed by the cooler in the basement and Jeremy mostly lived on pizza or take-out. "What's all this for?" she asked.

Elena raised her head from chopping and her smile fell from her face. "We thought we'd take a casserole to Mayor Hopkins' house."

Caroline frowned. She'd been on the receiving end of sympathy casseroles barely a year ago. "A casserole won't bring Bonnie back Elena," she commented.

"What happened to the eternal optimist, Little Miss Sunshine?" commented Damon.

Caroline didn't know what was coming over her but suddenly she felt really angry for some reason or another. "Let me think, our best friend died and you two are standing there playing Happy Families!" she said.

Damon and Elena exchanged worried looks. Elena seemed hurt. "Come on, Blondie. You didn't turn it off, did you?" asked Damon, slightly worried though probably mostly for Elena's sake.

"No!" Caroline protested. She saw Elena visibly sigh in relief. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm just in kind of a bad mood. I didn't mean to snap at you like that." There was an awkward pause between the three of them and Caroline quickly tried to shift the subject away from herself. "All the invites arrived today. All of Mystic Falls knows now."

"The sooner we can get this memorial over with, the sooner we can put this all behind us," Elena said grimly. Caroline frowned and turned away. What had come over her earlier? She had seen the couple and instantly seen red. It was like she was going crazy. Or you're jealous, whispered a little voice inside her head.

Klaus was feeding from a young woman behind the bar where Caroline used to work. It was his third drink that evening. He intended to get drunk on blood. He wanted his bloodlust to be more powerful than his lust for the blonde who'd captivated him and who had left him. He snarled as someone pulled the body out from under him. It was Rebekah.

"I wasn't finished," he growled.

"Yeah, well you're getting sloppy," snapped Rebekah. "I had to get rid of the two other bodies you drained myself!"

"I didn't ask you to do that, sister," he said wearily. He wasn't in the mood to get a lecture from Rebekah of all people. After all, it had been she who'd committed murders around the world each time she'd been heartbroken by one of her many boyfriends. Deciding to ignore his sister, Klaus went back to his drink. Rebekah waited patiently next to him for him to finish and when he did, she pulled him home.

After she'd made him take a long shower to erase all the blood, she sat him down with a cup of vintage, barely-counts-as-liquor wine and asked, "What happened?"

"Christ, is nobody allowed to drink anymore without somebody thinking it's an opportunity to psycho-analyse them?" he exclaimed.

"So it's a total coincidence that Caroline Forbes arrived home two days ago and now you're drowning your sorrows like some cheap drunk?"

"And what is it to you, little sister?" Klaus' face contorted into an ugly sneer. "Have you come here to enjoy my pain after all the times you suffered? Well, guess what? I'm fine!" He relaxed into a smirk. "You can leave now, Rebekah. I assure you, you're not wanted here."

Rebekah shook her head. "You are such a guy! Why won't you admit that you're in love with her?"

Klaus grinned and started to chortle into his glass. He couldn't stop himself. Rebekah was just so ridiculous sometimes. His sister was, of course, staring at him as if he'd gone bonkers. When she asked him what the hell the matter was, he answered, "You aren't even being vindictive! You may have lived a hundred lifetimes and yet you still believe we're family enough for me to tell you all my gooey little secrets!"

Rebekah, got up, ready to flounce out of Klaus' loft but she wasn't leaving with getting the last word. "You're a fool," she spat. "You're closer to happiness- to experiencing an epic love- than I've been in a very long time and yet you sit here, on your ass, getting drunk and high on blood." Klaus didn't even look up at her, but flinched as the door slammed behind her.

Still, what Rebekah had said stuck with him for a long time. Was Caroline really his epic love? Ever since he'd turned into a vampire, he'd avoided the 'L' word like the plague. The drama with Tatia as well as her death had haunted him. But, then again, Caroline haunted him now. That time when he'd almost killed her, she'd said that he could be saved. She'd said:

"It's because you're hurt, which means that there is a part of you that is human."

"How could you possibly think that?"

"Because I've seen it. Because I've caught myself wishing that I could forget all the horrible things that you've done."

"But you can't...can you?"

"I know that you're in love with me... and anybody capable of love is capable of being saved."

For the better part of an hour, he replayed those words in his head again and again in the back of his head. Finally, he stood up and looked at the couch, picturing the one in the Gilbert House. As he watched, he saw Caroline take her last breaths and when she was lying still, he bolted from the room. Now he knew: he was in love with Caroline Forbes.

Caroline gazed at her reflection in the full-length mirror in the Salvatore's guest room with a critical eye. She was dressed from head to toe in black, which contrasted pleasingly with her fair skin and blond hair but was still a jump from the flower prints and bright colours she usually wore. Unfortunately, the dress code to Bonnie's memorial presented her with few options in the way of fashion. Satisfied, she turned to the vanity table where she sat, examining the bags underlining her eyes. The hours of organising flowers and receptions to mourn her best friend had had a straining effect on her. Despite the sleep she'd gotten last night, her muscles were rigid and cramped.

She moaned with a sigh of relief when cool hands rested on her shoulders and began to massage her neck. Slowly, Klaus bended and his lips started caressing her collar, working his way up finally to her mouth...

Caroline jerked awake, panting heavily. She realised quite quickly that it had all been a dream. Her outfit for the service lay on the chair where she'd left it the night before and it was only barely sunrise. Irked by the dream, she climbed begrudgingly out of bed and began to get ready. Though, as a vampire, much less time was needed to get ready than before, today, she went extra slowly, as if readying herself for the long day in front of her. By the time she'd applied her makeup, she could already hear noise downstairs.

After her outburst the day before, she wasn't looking forward to coming face to face with her friends if she was to control herself today, she would need at least one of those bags of B+ that Damon kept in the cooler. Caroline resolved to act as if nothing had happened.

She arrived in the kitchen as Elena and Damon were having their own breakfast. Ignoring the older Salvatore, Caroline flung her arms around her best friend. "Thank you so much for coming today, Elena."

"Of course," Elena said, hugging her back. "Are you ready?"

Caroline nodded. Grabbing her purse, she answered, "As I'll ever be."

Bonnie Bennett's memorial service was in Fell's Church. Almost the entire town showed up thanks to Caroline bullying most of them into attending and because Bonnie had grown up in Mystic Falls, where everyone knew her. Many spoke, sharing memories of school trips, dances, and birthdays, including Elena, Matt, Mr. Bennett, and an aunt. She cried and she laughed and she felt closure. Before, she couldn't move past Bonnie's death, couldn't even think about what might happen next for her. Now, she felt she could continue with her life, though she would never forget her friend.

After the service, the congregation moved to the Lockwood Estate, which was only a short walk away, for the reception. Caroline, surprisingly enough, wasn't needed to interfere with almost any major event catastrophes and was free to mingle. Surprisingly, she actually had fun. She'd missed the small-town community atmosphere of Mystic Falls. Though there were many, many faces missing, she was still happy to around the people who'd practically raised her.

After the last couple of people left the party, she returned to the Salvatore Boarding House, knowing what she finally was to reveal to her friends. Damon and Elena were on the couch. They'd left the party early because Elena was so upset by Bonnie's memorial.

"Damon, Elena," she said with a deep sigh, "There's something I need to tell you."

The couple turned around to look at her. Elena nodded apprehensively, signalling her to continue.

"For the past few weeks, I haven't been at my dad's boyfriend's house like I said. I've been with Klaus in New Orleans," Caroline explained.

"What?!" exclaimed Damon. "You shacked up with the Original Hybrid?"

"Well, not at first. I only moved into the loft when Marcel, the so-called King of New Orleans, threatened me."

"Yeah," Damon muttered, "And I'm sure Klaus didn't take advantage of that." Caroline stared daggers at Damon, knowing perfectly well what he was insinuating.

She was about to rebuke him when Elena murmured, "Damon, that's not fair."

"Whatever. I don't need this crap!" Damon exited his house, slamming the door behind him.

Elena, avoiding Caroline's eyes, patting the seat beside her and Caroline sat. Caroline could feel a disconnect between her and her friend. She could tell there was suspicion there. "Elena, nothing happened between me and Klaus."

When Elena finally spoke, her voice was heavy and hoarse. "Nothing? How can you expect me to believe that when he's obviously in love with you and you lived together?"

"Okay, fine, I kissed him once. But that was before he proved what a really, really awful person he was," Caroline confessed.

"How could you after everything he's done to all of us? And what about Tyler?"

"Tyler left me, Elena," Caroline said.

Elena looked sympathetically towards her and Caroline remembered when she had been so torn up because Stefan had left her. "I know, Caroline," said Elena. "But it's Klaus!" She shuddered.

"And what about all the horrible things Damon did to me?" Caroline accused.

Elena frowned, offended. She protested, "People change!"

"And I thought Klaus had too! I made a mistake!"

Elena turned away. "I don't think Damon would be comfortable with having you stay here anymore. I think you should probably go."

Caroline replied, "Okay." Then, she went upstairs to get her things. After Caroline had packed up all her stuff and walked proudly out of the Salvatore House, she drove home to the house she'd grown up in. She felt so very, very stupid. How could she have let herself go to New Orleans of all places with Klaus of all people after everything he'd done to her friends? Now Damon was mad at her and Elena wouldn't answer her calls.

As Caroline strode into her bedroom, she realised that all she wanted to do was crawl into a ball and cry. Stefan was MIA, Damon and Elena had kicked her out of their lives probably for good and Matt had just texted her to tell her that he was joining Rebekah in Peru or something, not to mention that since he'd given her his house, Tyler hadn't contacted her. Was this going to be her life for the next thousand years? Just surviving, but forever having to live with that loneliness.

No, she wouldn't let it be! She remembered less than a year ago when she'd been in this very room, packing to start her life away from this town with Tyler Lockwood. Caroline decided to find Tyler and they could be together forever. Maybe they could discover the world, like Matt and Rebekah.

Caroline repacked her suitcase and turned to leave only to see a figure in the doorway. "Hello, love," Klaus said.

Wow! I didn't expect this chapter to be so long! It was a pretty challenging chapter but I'm happy with the way it turned out. I'm sorry about the lack of Klaroline in this chapter but, by the cliffy, I'm sure you can tell that the next chapter will be full of it.

I like how in this chapter we see really how Klaus' feelings for Caroline affect him personally. Also, I think Caroline's also starting to understand the loneliness that Klaus feels.

Next chapter: get ready for the return of Tyler Lockwood!

Please, please, review, comment, predict how Caroline reacts to Klaus' reappearance, etc!

-Brianne