So I know the ending to this chap eng. I got lazy. I still hope you enjoy. I'd really like to know how you all feel about Sully over Daryl. I mean come on I need opinions on where to go with it. I'm so scared to make them serious but eng IDK. Any way I'll let you to it. Enjoy!

And leave a review ;)

Chapter 5: Memories of feelings

(Sully)

You're a living inspiration for what I never wanna be,
and I see you've been blinded by what you believe
And now back up and sit down, shut up and act like you need to be. (Godsmack- the enemy)

(Angel)

Who really knows what rights all the wrongs anyway?
Who really cares what people do or say?
No matter where this life takes me
I'll never let it compromise
Too much luck to bet it on do or die. I've seen everything that I could see.

Lived by the rules you that you gave me and fell apart
All the wrong turns down a dead end street so far
I stretch my wings and breathe in different day
Alone and broken is the price I pay
But that's ok. (Godsmack- Good day to die)

The still morning was calm and almost immaculate; if the dead weren't walking around it would've been the perfect world. The birds chirped in harmony with the bees buzzing around in the wisteria. Everything in the trees untouched unlike the rest of the world that had been tainted with death.

Sunlight seeped through the cracks on the door of the small tree house. The room was hot and between the light and heat Angel awoke drenched in sweat. Angel set up slowly not to wake Sully who was sleeping soundly minus the small spouts of snoring. His face was buried in the pillows.

She quickly slid off the bed grabbing up her rifle and strapping it back on. If she was going to leave without him she had to be quick. She faintly thought about the group back at the prison. Did they even miss her? She didn't think about it too hard as she stood stretching.

"Trying to slip off?" Sully asked faintly. Angel turned starring at him with a bit of disappointment. She wasn't quick enough. He laid out holding his head up with his hand smiling at her. She sighed.

"You can't go . . . I can handle myself." She frowned letting her gaze fall to the wooden floor beneath her feet as she pulled her rifle tighter on her back. He cocked his eyebrow up as his smile faded. He pushed himself up and rested one elbow on his knee.

"Sweetheart I never said you couldn't handle yourself . . . it's just." He was searching desperately for words as she slid down the wall to the floor grabbing her head.

"I said no!" She was getting a bit angry with him now. It was the first time she was ever truly mad at him. She glared up at him and he returned the gesture with his one of a kind go-to-hell looks. It sent a chill down her spine but she didn't let her glare die.

"Angel what the fuck?" He rolled off the bed sluggishly landing on his feet and leaned against the wall across from her. "I just found you after twelve years of not hearing from you! Not knowing if you were dead or alive! I missed you! Don't you understand that?" He wiped his hand over his face in disgust. "Oh I fucking forgot!" He pushed away from the wall and stomped his foot tugging on his short hair. "You're Angel Hellfire! The most inconsiderate bitch on the planet! You don't give two shits about what other people think!"

She stood then her violet eyes sifting to a dark red. She bit her lip trying to not make things worse but she couldn't help herself. "If I recall right you never came once to see Jade in the hospital cuz' you were too busy jacking off! The day she died I begged you to come with me to see her but you were too busy fucking what's her face!"

"You can't remember her name either?" He was trying really hard not to show how much guilt he felt about that. Her words hit home and it hurt worse then anything that haunted him. He tried to smile but he couldn't A silence fell and he couldn't look at Angel or it would've broke him. He crossed his arms trying to put up a wall he could never seem to hold up around her. Why would it work now?

Angel sighed seeing the hurt in his eyes. She wasn't going to feel sorry for them though. She turned and reached for the door. "Please don't do this to me again," he said in a whisper, as silent tears threatened to spill over. She paused biting her lip begging herself just to open the door and leave but she couldn't. Something had nailed her feet to the ground.

"Sully don't put me through this. You need to stay here with your brother and Jewel . . . these people need me as much as Jewel and Sammy need you. You made the mistake of leaving Sammy behind before don't do it to him again." She gave a side ways glance and could almost see all the regret Sully was living at the moment.

"He's a big boy now . . . I need you."

"We're the type of people that don't get to have needs like that. We gotta be there for others."

"Maybe you . . . and look what it's done to you. You used to be so sweet and care free when you were sober . . . Why can't that girl be here again? I needed you after Jade passed . . . Sammy did too. Why weren't you there then?" She sighed.

"I haven't changed I just grew up saw how cruel the world was . . . I wasn't strong enough back then to help anyone."

"Well I need your help now! I need you to be here with me! You don't get to be here one day and gone the next!" He pushed away from the wall angrily. The hurt in his voice clearly visible.

"What if you die? Anything could happen!" She raised her voice throwing her arm out. "Nothing is going to happen to me until I'm good and damn ready for it to! Maybe not even then!" She was letting things out that she hadn't in a long time. "Everyone I care about seems so fucking fragile but I've never died and I got scars to prove I should've! Do you have any idea what it'd do to me to have your blood on my hands!" She teared up.

"The same fucking thing if I never saw you again and didn't know what happened to you! You remember back in NC when we were kids? Pantera playing on the radio you cried in my arms because we thought all of us were going to get separated in foster care so we ran away! You, Jade, Sammy, and me! Do you remember what you told me that night before we took off with that crappy ass band?" She remembered it perfectly like any other memory. It was bitter sweet, something she could never forget.

Angel waited quietly behind the large building like she had done many nights before. She hated the damn place worse then she hated the cold. It explained why she was in torn silky pajamas in the middle of winter waiting as patiently as she could instead of being inside in the heat.

She bit her lip hard trying to stop her teeth from chattering. She shivered a lot hugging herself tightly. Tears pooled down her cheeks after a few moments as she thought about what could happen in the next few days. She could loose all her friends, all shipped off to another foster home because no one wanted to adopt them.

A figure walked from around the dark corner of the building. She was scarred it was one of the staff finding out she had slipped out. She relaxed a bit as a young Sully appeared under the moonlight. He frowned at her when he got closer carrying a small duffle bag. He glared at her when he noticed she was bare foot. "You trying to catch your death?" he whispered. She tried to smile but her teeth chattered.

He gave a loud sigh before taking his coat off and wrapped it around her. He quickly kicked off his raggedy brown boots and and kicked them toward her. "Put those on," he ordered being left in his socks, a thin t-shirt, and tore up jeans.

"I'm not taking your shoes," she hissed giving the best glare she could manage. He cocked an eyebrow.

"Well we're not going to the river then." She rolled her eyes at him and he smiled lightly.

"Fine ok." She quickly stuck her feet in them and followed him as he walked towards the woods. Being scared of the dark she grasped his hand and he didn't argue. The walk was silent but somewhat peaceful besides Angel jumping at every branch and twig that snapped.

They came to a clearing and the sound of running water over powered the sound of hooting howls talking and crickets chirping. Sully quickly fled over to a stack of half burnt wood and brought out a lighter.

He snatched some dried out grass nearby and lit it placing it under the wood. Shortly a fire blazed. He threw the bag to the side as Angel came closer. He plopped down and brought out a blanket from the bag. He patted the ground softly beside him silently asking her to sit. She complied sitting close to him and he wrapped the blanket around them pulling her, hugging her tight.

He reached over and turned on a small hand held radio and it played some heavy music. Angel brought out a pack of cigarettes from her bra and a lighter. "Oh you don't put on any damn clothes but you had time to remember the smokes," he said sending her a mischievous look. She laughed lightly starring into the fire. She lit one up and handed it to him before lighting her own.

A silence fell for a bit. Angel started sobbing into his shoulder. "Sully they going to separate us! What are we going to do?" He hugged her tight and planted a small kiss on her forehead.

"No they're not . . . We're leaving tonight. All of us. My cousin knows this shitty band going on tour and they're looking for a crew. I know enough to get us all by."

"Really?" She sniffed and wiped her tears away looking up to him. He nodded sending her a smile.

"I told you no one could ever come between our little family. No one can ever separate me and you." Pantera played one of their softer songs and the moment was something that couldn't be forgotten.

"Promise me you'll never leave me," she said tearing up again looking up at him with pale blue eyes.

"Only if you promise."

"I promise." She let her head rest on his shoulder.

"And I promise." He lifted her head up and planted a kiss on her lips and she blushed. "I'll always be there to take care of you sweet heart."

"I love you Sully."

"Love you more Angel."

Angel almost teared up at the memory. It reminded her just how much Sully did for her. He did everything for her. He took care of her when she was helpless. She could hardly believe she was that helpless at once. How much she used to fall and he would always be there to catch her.

"I never broke my promise," he said bitterly. "I never left you . . . you left me and it broke my fucking heart and you're doing it again! You're not the same Angel I knew back then. You're a heartless bitch now . . . You know what." He shoved past her and stopped at the door shoving it open angrily. "Just leave! Go on you love seeing me cry over you!" He stepped out and slammed the door shut behind him. It almost knocked her back.

She plopped on the floor losing the ability to stand. What the hell had she done? "This is what I wanted though," she said to herself starring at the floor with an emotionless face.

She had forgotten who she used to be. How much Sully really meant to her. Still the fact stood that in this world he could be ripped away so easily in an instant just like Sunny.

It was safe here though in the trees. It was a little piece of paradise that no one could taint. They were all safe here. Why couldn't he see that? She finally managed to stand again.

She opened the door hesitantly. Sammy stood outside with his arms crossed. He looked like he had just woken up. His hair was a mess and his eyes half open. "What?" she asked a bit more hatefully then she meant.

"Why you gotta give my brother so much hell?" He went straight to the point.

"Cuz' he wants to come with me and he doesn't need to." Samuel rolled his eyes and leaned against the rails of the small walkway. He gave a sigh.

"You have to remember Sully was the big brother to all of us . . . he took care of us made sure we had food in our bellies, a roof over our heads . . . Jewel made sure I knew that you're perfectly capable of handling yourself. Sully though he doesn't know that he thinks you still need someone to look out for you. You weren't always this bad ass even though you acted like it around a lot of people . . . he loves you and still finds it a must to look after you . . . You can't blame him for that."

"I know . . . I know. He's means a lot to me that's why I'd rather him stay here. I've lost a lot of people that meant something to me in this world. I can't lose him too."

"Did you ever think about what it'd do to him if you never came back . . . not just him but Jewel too. Sully can handle himself he just wants to by you through this." She got angry then. Samuel didn't know what the hell he was talking about to her. He didn't know. He didn't understand what she was trying to say. She slung up her arm pointing to her bite by a messed up tattoo.

"You see this? I got bit and lived. I'm immune to the virus because people pumped me full of experimental drugs and got lucky. Can he say that if he got the tiniest scratch that he'd be ok?" Samuel looked at the scar then Angel with a shocked expression. His face losing some color. "No I didn't think so!" she continued, losing all her patience. "A friend of mine got bit in the early days of the outbreak. I had to shoot him! Could you do that if he got bit?"

"No . . . no I couldn't."

"So you think I could? You're all safe here. Nothing can touch you up here! Down there though it's hell on earth. It's not just the walkers people have to worry about anymore. Living people are turning into monsters too, fighting over who deserves to live more."

They both grew silent as Sully slung open the door open across from them carrying a small bag. He wore a long black leather coat with the sleeves rolled up. A semi automatic machine gun strapped to his back. A pistol hung loosely out the front of his belt and a long machete hung off his side. "We're going Angel," he said leaving no room for objections in his tone of voice. "The only way I'm staying is if you stay."

Jewel ran out then latching on Sully's leg. "Uncle Sully you can't go! Angel will come back but you can't go!" she cried. He patted the girl's head feeling a bit guilty.

"Jewel I'll come back with her . . . I promise." He shrugged her off his leg and walked over to where the ladder was giving Angel an unidentified look.

"He'll be ok. He has to do this," Samuel said before walking to his brother. He hugged him tight patting his back. "I love you brother."

"I love you too Sammy don't let anything happen to Jewel. I'll be back." He pushed his brother away with a small smile. Angel walked over to Jewel and snatched her up as the small girl cried.

"Angel please don't let anyone hurt Sully," she said hugging Angel's neck.

"I won't." She set Jewel down and placed a small kiss on her forehead. She turned and walked over to Sully seeing that Aylen was watching them leaning against one of the houses.

"I love you!" Jewel called out from across the way still crying a little.

"I love you too!" Angel replied as Sully smirked kicking the rolled up ladder down. He went down. As Angel went to leave Samuel caught her hand. "Be careful and take care of each other," he said lightly.

"Didn't we always?" She squeezed his hand offering a small smile before letting go and going down.

At the bottom the ladder was rolled back up at the top. She sent Sully a dirty look that he didn't catch. "Lead the way," he said pulling the backpack higher on his shoulder. She sighed and walked back toward the way she had come. The walk was silent and they didn't even look at each other for the most part.

A group of five walkers got in their path. Sully quickly pulled Angel behind a tree. "We'll go around them," he whispered pointing in a nother direction away from them.

"The hell we will." She snatched his machete out of its case and he tried grabbing her arm but she charged at the things blade raised with a maniac way about it. She cut one down through the middle of its head before kicking one on the ground stabbing it through the eye. She cut another in half through the stomach landing her boot in its head smashing its skull.

She cut the other two heads off with one swing. Sully ran up snatching the blade away and glared at her. A bit shock but the rest was anger. She did it for one reason. To prove to the man she knew what she was doing. She was proud of her work. "What the fuck?" Sully said angrily sleeving the blade after wiping it off on one of the bodies clothes.

"Proving a point," she answered with a small smile.

"Said you weren't reckless anymore. That two damn lies." He turned to walk away but Angel caught his shoulder and spun him around to face her.

"Yea maybe I lied. You don't have to rub it in my face. I'm sorry I grew up and learned how to take care of myself, but don't be mad at me for it. I get that you took care of me back in the day but you can't hate me for learning my own way." He glared at her and slapped her hand away.

"And I'm so fucking sorry I still care about the big bad wolf," he said sarcastically turning and walking away.

"Fuck!" she growled sending her fist into the side of a tree and busted one of her knuckles. She quickly followed and walked past him tying a rag around her hand.

"What the hell happened to your hand?" he asked starring at her broke hand not the one she just wrapped a rag around.

"I busted my knuckle."

"No I mean the cast."

"Broke my hand. Speaking of which I think it's about better."

"Don't take it off! It might still be."

"No matter how long I leave it on it'll still be messed up. Asshole who wrapped it didn't do it right. I think I just dislocated my joints. Yet he wrapped it like I splintered the bones."

"Glad you know so much about being a doctor now." He said it sarcastically looking away.

"Fuck you Sully."

"I wish you would." He hid his smirk at the look she threw at him. Silence fell after his words and that was just fine between both of them.

Angel slowly walked up to the prison gate with Sully following closely behind. He was actually a bit nervous about the place. Something didn't sit right. Then again he had been to prison once and he promised himself he'd never go back. But there he was following in line right behind this woman into only god knows.

Angel quickly dodged the walkers and he followed. She opened the gate and pushed him in. He wanted to yell at her for it but he said nothing as a bullet whizzed by him and hit the dirt beside his foot. Angel quickly stepped in front of him starring up at one of the watchtowers with a glare.

"Hey not cool!" She called up. She could see Rick pointing his gun at them. He came down the ladder and approached them gun raised.

"Who the hell is that?" Rick demanded looking past her at the man.

"Who the hell are you?" Sully retorted in a deeper voice glaring at him.

"His name is Sully I knew him before all this. He was with his brother; he was taking care of Jewel with him . . . I thought he could come back and help." The thing was Rick didn't trust any outsiders even on Angel's word. He relaxed his gun for a second upon hearing Jewel was still alive. He quickly raised it back up.

"Take your weapons off," Rick demanded as Angel stepped out of the way a little.

"What the fuck?" Sully said taking a step forward towards the man. "Listen to him," Angel begged putting her arm out to stop him. Sully glared at her then back at Rick. He quickly took off all his weapons and threw them in the dirt. "Happy?" he questioned sending her an 'I hate you right now' look.

Without any warning Rick used one of his cop moves and took Sully down laying him flat in the dirt and zipped tied his hands together. Sully said nothing but sent Angel a glare as he was in the dirt. Rick quickly pulled him to his feet. "Is this all necessary?" Angel questioned placing her hand on her hip. He just sent her a quick glance before taking Sully into the yard. Angel quickly followed behind them.

Sully look absolutely pissed as he leaned against the bars of the cell Rick had placed him in. "These are the nicest people I've ever had the pleasure of knowing," he said sarcastically. Angel shrugged before taking her knife out and cutting the zip ties of his hands. "Thanks," he mumbled rubbing his wrists.

Glen walked in the cellblock kicked the door shut behind him, carrying Sully's weapons. He shot a quick look at Angel but looked away. "Angel!" Rick called from the top of the stairs. She quickly fled up and stopped as everyone stood watching her. She gave a fake smile.

"Yes?" She leaned against the rails.

"Why did you bring him here? We don't know anything about him."

"He's not dangerous or a threat I swear on my name. He could help us . . . Since Daryl's gone now we need man power against those people. You do understand we've started a war don't you?" Rick glared at her for a long time but she held her ground just starring back at him with crossed arms.

"This is your shot to prove you know what the hell you're talking about." He relaxed a bit. "Don't make me regret it." She smiled. Big step up from how he treated her word in the past. She didn't want to think about that now though.

"You won't," she stated. "You gonna let him out?" Rick nodded a yes. He quickly walked down carrying Sully's pistol. Angel followed behind him. She leaned against the wall as Rick whispered something to Sully. Angel could hear it just fine.

"You hurt anyone. I mean anyone that isn't shooting at you first and I'll shoot you on the spot," Rick said glaring at Sully. He bit his lip starring back as Rick unlocked the door.

"You have my word Warden. Only here to look out for Angel." Rick almost smiled but didn't let his frown linger. Sully stepped out slowly with his hands at his sides looking at Angel.

"So where's my dog?" Angel asked referring to Mutt as she starred at Rick. "Is he been behaving."

"Uh . . . yea. He's probably hanging around Judith's crib. He let's us feed Judith now without trying to kill us. He never leaves her side." Rick gave a small weak smile. He turned back to Sully and held the gun out. "I meant what I said." Sully smiled.

"And I gave you my word." Sully took the pistol slowly and stuck it in the front of his belt.

"I gave you your chance Angel," Rick said looking at her before going back up the stairs.

"Come on. I'm the new Warden," she said going to the door and unlocking it.

"I fucking think not," he replied stepping out. "Don't even want to imagine what you'd have me do." She had to smile and he smiled in return.

Angel took him outside to the yard. "I don't see what's here that you had to come back to," he said looking the place over. He noticed Michonne near the overturned buss doing something. "Who's that? She's . . . reminds me of Aylen."

"That's Michonne . . . she's a quiet one."

"Where the Camaro come from? Sweet ride."

"It's mine . . . No I didn't steal it." Rick came out then and they ignored him and he did the same. He was uneasy about Sully being there but he was going to trust Angel on this one.

"What's his story?" Sully asked starring after the man as he went out of the safety of the fences over to a little marsh.

"Why don't you ask him? Come on give you a good view. Doesn't really do the tree house justice but eng." She shrugged and walked over to one of the watchtowers climbing it quickly with him following her.

At the top a silence fell. It wasn't one Angel could stick with. "Wanna check out my sound system?" she asked.

"Got some good music? I'll follow you to hell to here some good music." He smiled as she laughed.

"Course I do. Come on." She quickly stepped down on the ladder and went to her car. She jumped in the driver's seat and Sully jumped in the passenger's side slamming the door shut. She quickly put a cd in and Sully smiled as the music flowed out the speakers. Next thing Angel had a bottle of whiskey out the back seat. Sully cocked his eyebrow and crossed his arms as she took a big swallow.

"Celebrating is over . . . you gotta be on point now," he said, disapproving her drinking. She didn't look at him.

"I'm always on point. Been drinking just about everyday for the last ten years of my life." She frowned at her excuse for it as it ran through her mind. She had a problem but it was the only medication she had left to keep her sane. He would never understand it. "You wouldn't understand if I told you."

"I could try." She stayed silent for a long time collecting her thoughts remembering all kind of terrible things.

"Well after Jade passed I started drowning myself when Axel took me in to the organization I thought everything was gonna be alright . . . That's until I went on my first job. The horror I seen and brought about didn't faze me at first. Then it just happened over night I couldn't eat . . . couldn't sleep without nightmares without reliving it, had a bit to do with the drugs they were pumping into me but. . . I started drinking again to fill my stomach, and sometimes I got lucky and fell into a dead sleep." She paused starring at the bottle. It's the only thing she could ever depend on because people died and left her to live her misery alone. The bottle was her only friend.

"This guy came in," she continued. "Straight out of prison thought he was the badest mother fucker to walk the earth but he became my best friend. He helped a lot . . . helped me keep my mind because I was losing it. I learned how to live again you know cuz' I had something to believe in."

"What did you believe in?" He rested his elbow against the door starring at her. She took another drink trying to not let all that ran through her head get the better of her emotions.

"I believed in helping people. Trying to make the world better. He made me believe that. He just wanted to help me and all I did was get him killed on a job. I had to watch him die." She teared up a bit but wiped them away before they fell. " 'The bullet pierced his lung,' Jeff yelled at me when I was crying and do anything I could to keep him alive."

Sully stayed silent trying to imagine what it must've been like. He felt guilty. He wasn't there for her then. He couldn't blame her for becoming what she was now. She had to watch Jade die then someone else.

"Really started drowning in it then," she said trying to smile. "I couldn't close my eyes without seeing him. He made me promise to keep going until the end. So I have. I thought after that life couldn't get any worse. There were many times when a bullet screamed at me. The only thing I had was booze to keep me from pulling the trigger." She took another swallow starting to feel the warmth comforting her scared heart.

"Did you get over it?" he asked.

"Nope but I had hope. Hope that maybe one day I'd find someone who could help me. After the outbreak Sunny did."

"Who's he?"

"Another guy I trained in there. One of my brothers, my comrade. Made it so hard to shoot him after he got bit. Tiny is dead too . . . Jeff . . . they're all gone." A single tear drooled down her cheek. Jeff had to die it was only justifiable that way. "I want to be with them . . . I'm so scared. Scared I'll lose someone else. I should be dead right now . . . seems like everyone I care for dies. Like there put on death's shit list and then just ripped away . . . right out of my hands. I can't do anything but watch cuz' no matter how hard I try I can't keep them safe. That's why I wanted you to stay."

"I won't die I promise. I won't leave you alone."

"No Sully! Don't promise me that!" She threw her hand on the wheel starring at him with silent tears falling. "Don't make that promise because you might not be able to keep it. You never know when you're going to die could be slow and painful or quick and fair. I shouldn't have made that promise that night. I lied to you and I'm so sorry."

"It's ok." He reached over and wiped a few stray tears trying to comfort her. "I forgive you."

"No." She pushed his hand away wiping them herself. "I don't deserve it. All you ever did was try to take care of me, keep me safe just like Daryl did. All I gave in return was hurtful words and pain to both of you." He wanted to know who the hell Daryl was but he found it best not to question it. He could clearly see Angel was in a fragile state of mind at the moment. She took another drink trying to put up a wall to fool everyone that she was ok. In time it would be but a the moment she felt weak.

"I'll do whatever I damn well please." He smiled as she looked away. "I'm not holding it against you. Dealt with the hand you were given ya' know."

"Love you Sully," she mumbled throwing the bottle in the back seat lighting up a cigarette.

"Love you too sweet heart . . . now you're losing that cigarette." He quickly snatched it out of her hand. She gave him a cholly horse. "Owe," he moaned not being able to hold in laughter. She had to laugh too. She quickly lit up another.

Chaos began then. Angel happened to look over and see Carol standing with the blonde ex-prisoner when a bullet shot straight through his head. "Holy shit!" She yelled ducking down as gun fire began.

"Stay down!" Sully yelled jumping out of the car drawing his pistol.

"No!" she cried after him, jumping out herself.