Shoot Me

It had been a week now since Hotch had returned from being AWOL. He'd been even sharper and more serious than before and the team wondered what had got into him. Obviously something had happened in his few days of being AWOL.

They were out on a case in Washington when the UnSub got him alone just like he'd planned. This woman was shooting authoritative figures that reminded her of her abusive husband who had been a cop and her first victim. HOTCH HAD TOLD THE PUBLIC THE FBI were involved knowing she'd come after him and had sent his team away. He wanted to be alone with her.

He looked her straight in the eye and taunted, "Come on then shoot me or aren't you brave enough to shoot an FBI agent?" she brought her gun it to face him and her ginger on the trigger. "Come on, then. Shoot me."

The killer looked intimidated but the gun went off and hit him in the chest. He fell back while out of the blue Morgan tackled the UnSub and Rossi rushed to Hotch to try and stop the blood so he wouldn't lose too much while the paramedics were called. Hotch tried to fight Rossi's hands off while Rossi got frustrated and Morgan looked in concern and alarm. What the hell did Hotch just do? Did their usually calm and collected leader really have a death wish?

"What the fuck is going on with Hotch, man?" he asked. "He got a death wish or something?"

"I don't know. He hasn't been the same since he returned," Rossi answered looking up at him then fought with his best friend again who was losing consciousness. "Don't you dare, Aaron. Don't you dare die on us. Jack and the team need you."

He closed his eyes and they couldn't feel a pulse. He stood back and looked down in shock. He couldn't be gone. The paramedics soon arrived and got to work reviving him until they got a heartbeat. He opened his eyes again and became hysterical. Why did they bring him back? Couldn't they just let him stay dead and not carry on living in pain? Couldn't they see how much pain he was in?

He'd lost the woman he loved and their son before he even knew they had one. He didn't know how much more he could bear. His life felt empty. No-one needed him even Jack wouldn't need him one day. He couldn't live alone again; it was far too lonely. Didn't everybody know he needed both his children but yet Emily had signed away his legal rights to his youngest son and didn't want him in the picture? They didn't want him interfering in Adam's life and he didn't have a legal say. There was nothing he could do within the law.

They put him in the ambulance and he stared blankly at the ceiling while Rossi accompanied him.

"Aaron, how could you be so bloody selfish? What's got into you? This isn't like you! Jack needs you. We need you. You need to stop this bullshit," he said to him sternly.

"Who cares? It's not like she loves me. She doesn't even want me to have anything to do with our son," he replied keeping his gaze on the roof of the ambulance not taking anything in.

"Aaron, you have to pull yourself together. This isn't fair on Jack."

"Look after him for me."

"Don't talk like this, Aaron. You will raise Jack. I'm going to make damn well sure of it. That boy's already lost a mother I won't let him lose a father."

He watched as a tear trickled down his best friend's face. It pained him to see him in so much pain but there must have been some misunderstanding. He had deduced he'd meant Emily and this wasn't like her either. If they had a son surely she wanted him in his life even if she was most probably married to Daniel now. If she'd signed over legal rights there must have been a damn good reason most probably Doyle. He'd been annihilating families and would have taken great pleasure in killing Emily's baby.

At the hospital he met up with Morgan and they agreed to call Emily. Only she could sort out this mess.