Harry Potter and the Goblin King

Summary: ? During-HP(canon through HP6, AU HP7+), Post-Labyrinth, major/constant spoilers

Chapter One

The punishment for rearranging time and changing reality was immense. This was something Jareth, as a King and a Fae, had known for as long as he had lived, just as every Magick-infused being knew for as long as he lived. There were rules in place to prevent that from happening for a reason; a screw-up could destroy whole planes of existances without any sort of malicious intent.

Thus it was that Jareth knew he would face serious reprecutions as soon as he was done with his 13 hours with his dearest Sarah. Too bad he wasn't prepared for what the Labyrinth had in store for him...

Months after his punishment had been enacted, Jareth, in his owl form, huffed and clicked his beak in annoyance. He was quickly becoming tired and angry with being kept where he was, even if he did technically deserve it. For his punishment was not simply to remain in his owl form (something he could easily deal with despite anything else); oh, no. It was to remain in his owl form, in magical London, in a human's magical owl shop. Not only that, but he was to be bought by a magical human-a "wizard" or a "witch", as they called themselves-and then proceed to learn a freakin' lesson by being with that "wizard"/"witch".

Needless to say, Jareth was unhappy with that decision.

Even more needless to say, Jareth was pissed off when he spent five and a half months or so without being adopted(*).

The increase in anger and/or annoyance from Jareth quickly gained him some negative side effects. He had been rather bad-tempered to start out with, taking out his anger on those who entered the shop, but the result of this was that he was placed in the back of the store far from where most "wizards" and "witches" bothered to travel in their search for a Post Owl and/or Familiar and that everyone who took a subsequent interest in him were warned that he had shown "dangerous tendencies".

That's right, "dangerous tendencies"! Who in the hell would dare accuse Jareth the Goblin King of having "dangerous tendencies", eh?!

...don't answer that.

Anyway, the point is that Jareth was beginning to give up hope of ever being chosen as a Post Owl and/or Familiar. This brings us back to the point of time where Jareth huffed and clicked his beak in annoyance.

'Honestly, it's not like I asked to be here,' he thought acidly as he lounged as best he could on the perch in his cage. His talons glistened menacingly when he shifted his grip but he took no notice, blinking his large, two-toned eyes disgustedly at the squalor many of the normal owls allowed themselves to be in. 'Why couldn't the Labyrinth just sentence me to a dip in the Bog or something? I would be more than willing to smell horribly for however long my Magick will allow instead of being in this nasty situation...'

These thoughts broke away when Jareth realized this was probably the hundreth time he had thought them and he clicked his beak again in annoyance, hooting a warning when one of the owls gave him a sadistically amused look. Then he realized what he was doing and groaned in his head, showing his self-disgust only by tucking his head under his wing.

'And now I'm making these stupid, if majestic, creatures out to be more intelligent than they are. I truly need to get out of here...preferably soon...'

"Well, ain't ye a pretty li'l thing," a booming voice said from just above Jareth. The Goblin King instantly withdrew his head from his wing and stared openly at the one who was apparently speaking to/about him. The monster of a man was tall, taller than most mortals in existence, with a mass of straggly hair and beard to his name and twinkling black eyes. He was also wearing a moleskin coat and had the stench of Giant in his aura.

Jareth gave a sharp snap of his beak as his feathers fluffed up warningly, unnerved and angered. He, like pretty much every other creature in existence, wasn't a fan of Giants and their brutal ways, although he was forced to tolerate them due to his position as a King. But tolerating them did not mean that Jareth would allow himself to be "owned" by one, even if he was only half.

But the half-Giant merely laughed at the display. "Spitfire, ain't ye?"

'You have no idea,' Jareth mentally snarled, glowering at the large man with burning blue eyes. He could picture the slit pupil in his right eye thinning and the normal one in his left enlarging as they always did when he was trying to be truly intimidating. The only problem was that the half-Giant was still unaffected and instead nodded thoughtfully.

"Ye seem in good health, an' yer stilla beaute, even if ye migh' give 'im some trouble wit' that attitude of yers," the half-Giant said to himself. He smiled widely from under his beard and nodded. "Righ'! Then I'll buy ye for 'im!"

Despite himself, Jareth slowly began to smooth down his feathers at these words. 'So then you're not buying me for yourself? Interesting...' If he had been human, Jareth would have smirked, but as it was he merely hooted lightly and bowed his head slightly in the direction of the half-Giant. 'Then I suppose I'll calm down and let you buy me, if only to satisfy my curiosity. Besides, clearly it's the Will of the Labyrinth for you to take me to whoever-you-wish, if you want to purchase this "owl" despite my fierce warnings...'

And thus Hagrid the half-Giant adopted Jareth the Goblin King for one Harry James Potter, soon to be enrolled in Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.

-END-

(*) Okay, this was just for my own amusement, but 13x13=169 and 169/30=5.6333(etc.), which is where I got "five and a half months or so" from. Yeah, I know, I'm pathetic. ;)

MKL's Post-Production Notes (10-3-13): Jareth. Oh Lord, Jareth. All...of my love. ALL OF IT. -drools to fantasies of Bowie's voice and tight leather pants-

SPOILERS: It would just be a few snippets of periods in Harry's life through Jareth/Hedwig's eyes, up until he's struck with the killing curse in book 7. This would set him free from his bindings as Hedwig and send him back to the Labyrinth, where he'd spend a day or so making sure everything was up to scruff before jumping back to help Harry (who he, being the obsessive fae he is, would have become super possessive of). He wouldn't really do much, to be honest...most of what he'd do during the 7th book would be behind the scenes until the trio were captured, which is when he would have jumped in and heroically saved the day and stuff. It'd be a sort of familial/friendship JarethHarry with a side of JarethSarah (who may or may not have appeared in later chapters).

:END SPOILERS So I'm going to go rewatch Labyrinth now, 'cause it's been FAR too long~ -whistles 'Dance Magic Dance' happily-