Pain
Luke had been visiting his father with the Healers every day for a month. His father was in grave pain, although physically he was healthy. Luke couldn't seem to get past the barriers in his father's mind. Even through the pain, Anakin remained motionless except for one word that continuously escaped his father's lips. "Padme." Luke and Leia's mother.
The meeting between Anakin and the Empire was on hold until his father awoke. Some of the smaller bases had taken hits, some of them had been captured. Luke, Han, and Lando along with other fighters had done what they could. Even Rex, Ahsoka, and Padme Tano had left the base to fight. There were huge bounties on their head to be taken dead or alive. Some of the retired Clones from the Clone Wars had sworn to Rex that the Emperor lived, and he didn't know whether to take this as speculation or something that had gone wrong in their engineering.
When Luke visited his father, sometimes Leia accompanied. She couldn't hate the man lying before her. He didn't remind her of Darth Vader when he was vulnerable, when he was suffering, when he was unable or unwilling to speak to her. Between them, the twins had discussed their different strong experiences of that day and they were both weary of what that suggested for the Future of the Republic. The twins were both fighting and would never give up fighting for freedom.
Luke got up as he did every day and trained before showering and going to visit his father. Sometimes his sister would come with him, sometimes she wouldn't. His father's hair had grown, it was both longer and darker than Luke's own. His father's skin had darkened so that the paleness had left it. Sometimes Mara Jade would accompany him, but most of the time he barely noticed him. This time however was different. "Padme," his father whispered again. But this time Luke felt a stirring from the Force. Anakin's eyelids fluttered and suddenly they opened staring straight at him. "She's alive, Luke. You felt it?" Anakin pleaded.
"I don't think I felt her. I think I felt the Emperor," Luke responded sadly.
"He's got her," Anakin whispered, running his hands through his tangled hair. "We've got to save her."
"We don't know where to look!" Luke cried, exasperated.
"He would have her. We follow her presence," Anakin said as if stating the obvious as he pulled himself into a sitting position. "First, I must construct a new lightsaber. You know where Obi-Wan hid during Exile?" Anakin asked his son. He noticed the hesitation and it angered him. "What harm can I do to Obi-Wan now? I know Obi-Wan he would have kept something to construct a lightsaber. I cannot go rescuing your mother without a proper Jedi weapon, son."
"I'll take you."
"Thank you."
"But you should rest."
"I have rested enough already."
"You will need to put a team together," Leia stated, coming from behind. She had sensed something and had followed him.
"Never needed anyone but myself before," Anakin grumbled. "I killed him once, I will destroy him again. Sithspit on my destiny. Can I never escape it?"
"What destiny?" Leia asked curiously. Anakin ignored her, it wasn't something he liked to talk about. He didn't want to be the Chosen One. He never had.
"Prepare a TIE fighter for me," he ordered as he went down to the mess hall to eat. He ate quickly and quietly and showered and changed into a flight suit. He reached out, he felt her. She had been subdued before, but now, her presence was burning. He couldn't fight Sidious without his weapon, his grip on the Dark Side wasn't what it had been, and even then it had never been as strong as Sidious.
"I'm coming with you," Leia stated.
"Princess, that's not necessary," Anakin replied as he readied Artoo and did an inspection of his star ship.
"Why not? She's my mother. That's who you are going to save, isn't it?"
"Yes," Anakin answered. "You aren't ready. I wouldn't want anything to happen to you," he replied quietly. "You have no idea what you will be dealing with."
"He nearly killed you before."
"That's inconsequential, Princess."
"I'm going," she stated again. "I am one of the Leaders of the New Republic and if I don't go I will make it very difficult for you to leave."
"Blackmail, Leia?"
"Whatever works."
"Fine. Tell Captain Solo that I will be leaving in 30 minutes."
"I'm not leaving your side. I don't trust you." Anakin turned around to face her.
"You think I would hurt Luke?" he asked, his eyes betraying hurt and betrayal as if she had betrayed him. She was finding it hard to hate him. Yes, she could be angry with him, but hate him, it was like hating Luke. So Luke, Leia, Anakin and Artoo set off for Tattooine. Finally, they arrived. Anakin lamented the bright orange of his flight suit and Luke wished for lighter colored clothes against the twin suns of Tattooine. Only Leia was dressed in white.
Meanwhile, on Naboo, Amidala as she knew herself sat down enjoying a meal in Theed Palace. She was waited on hand and foot, and had developed a friendship with Cos. She devoted her time to finding her son. "Tell me about your apprentice," she told Cos. He motioned for her to sit in her lap and she obliged. It seemed the only time he would tell her anything was when she would submit to his will. She sighed as she allowed him to stroke her. Thankfully, he hadn't moved too far, he seemed content to nuzzle and kiss her, and her heart pounded loudly with lust? Fear? Whenever she allowed such touches. She sat on his lap as he undid her top and began to talk to her, fondling her breasts quite harshly. There were days that she had bruises on them but she had to hear what he had to say and if she refused he would become silent...like someone else she had known. "My dear, my apprentice, Vader, was once a Jedi. He doesn't believe in anything. He slaughtered the Jedi against my Orders."
"You were a Jedi?"
"No," he drew his fingers to her nipples tugging painfully on one of them. "I was a Force-wielder, feared by the Jedi, they feared what they did not understand. I had hoped that we could live together peacefully, but Vader had other plans. He slaughtered them and he didn't stop with the masters," he said and stopped as he bit her flesh, and she recoiled. She had already learned that voicing any pain only amused him, so she didn't squawk even though something told her this was wrong, this wasn't how it was supposed to be. She blinked back tears when he bit into her flesh...for Luke. "He murdered the children. He tried to kill you and our child," he said tearing the material of her gown.
She was sitting there on his lap, unsure how to respond to him. A voice inside of her, whispered of the longing she had once felt, of the kindness once shown. Had losing their child done this to him? Had he always been this way? Had she been lovers with Vader? Had he found out? Was that why he was so rough with her? Did he love her? Did she love him? "Stand up," he said, his voice turning harsh as he pushed her from him. "Take off you clothes," he ordered. She stood, clutching the remnants of her dress. She thought about refusing but she could feel herself moving to do what was commanded of her. There was a way to block him, she felt and instantly she mentally pushed against him forcing the power away from her. Where had she learned this?
"You allowed him to seduce you, to turn you against me," he bit out. So that was it.
"I'm sorry. No," she shook her head. "I wouldn't, Ani." Suddenly, she found Cos's hands gentle as he removed the rest of her clothes, he scooped her up and carried her to their bedroom.
"My dear, I am sorry," he said. "Forgive me," he said, but she felt as if a snake were crawling in her brain. He lowered his lips to hers and began teasing her lips. "I have a lot of responsibility on me for one so young. We both do. I am the Emperor and you will become my Empress. We will rule the world. No one will take anything from us again. Ever. We will together destroy Vader, and get our son back. Everything will be perfect." He untied the rope binding her chest. "I can't bare to lose you," he told her. "I will change, I will be different. This thing with my apprentice will not get the best of me. Forgive me?" Padme nodded and kissed him back. How could she not? She had betrayed him with the very man who had tried to kill him, kill them both. She gave herself over to her lover. He would change. It was really her fault after all.
"Tell me about Luke." She would endure anything to find her child.
"Luke was strong in the Force. It was the reason I became Emperor to keep the Jedi from taking him. They did that. They took infants from their parents. Vader killed them all. He tried to kill me. He was only concerned with power. He thought that by killing the Jedi he gained their power. I thought he was going to kill you and our child. I was worried about you. While I tended to you, he kidnapped our infant son, turned him on us. He thinks we are the bad guys. He's just like you, Amidala," Cos told her.
"Luke believes he's Vader's son. He was obsessed with you, he believed you should have been his. I confess, I was friends with my apprentice. I cared for him. His betrayal hurt me, but to take our child. I went out of my mind. I couldn't think, couldn't eat. I searched for him, but only found him recently. Even after murdering the Jedi, he trained him as a Jedi. The boy, our son, is the last of the Jedi."
"Why would Vader do that?" Amidala asked.
"Take off my clothes," he ordered and she did as was ask shaking and feeling violently ill as she did so. She expected him to hurt her but he just laid there and she realized when she had finished disrobing her that he had fallen asleep. She sighed in relief, as she went to fresher to vomit. She couldn't stop shaking, why was she so afraid of this man? Even after all he had told her she couldn't seem to react toward him as she should. There was something she had said earlier that had changed his attitude what was it? What had she said. Think, Amidala, think, she was sorry that she had betrayed him. She sagged on the door frame and watched him. She was going to see what she could do on her own. She quickly dressed. Black. Her whole wardrobe was black. In her mind she saw a flash of color, but disregarded it. She moved silently throughout the castle wondering what she would accomplish by going to Theed.
Meanwhile, on Tattooine, Luke led the way. "Obi-Wan settled here?" Anakin asked, as he saw the small hut. He could feel Obi-Wan's presence, radiating in the Force. He knew that once-again he would meet his old master. He entered the hovel and looked around, feeling the steps Obi-Wan took. He began his meditation as he awaited Obi-Wan's presence. Luke and Leia hung back as they watched him.
"Is he alright?" Leia asked her brother. "I mean he is the one that murdered Obi-Wan."
"It wasn't him. It was Vader," Luke argued. Leia rolled her eyes. Anakin pulled out several black robes and changed.
"I can't believe he kept these." He was taking the trunk with him. Obi-Wan would have left it to him anyway. He had been Anakin's true master.
"Anakin," he heard from behind him.
"Master Obi-Wan," he said happily. "I was hoping to find you here. All those years I searched and you were here all that time."
"Yes, I knew it was the one place you would never look."
"It was risky. It was the only reason I cooperated with the Death Star, I was going to destroy this planet once and for all. There were only bad memories buried here."
"Surely, there was some good memories. This is where we met, after all. There will be time to reminiscent later. You must save your wife."
"Padme...is she alright?" Anakin asked slowly, feeling as if he didn't have the right to ask.
"Physically she's healthy, but the longer you wait the more emotional damage is befalling her."
"Because of me."
"Not directly. I cannot tell you anymore than that. She is on Naboo, Anakin. You must hurry."
"I will. Master, I will do whatever I can to undo what I have done."
"The Force will always be with you, and so will I." Anakin found his lightsaber. It seemed impossible but there it was clipped to his belt. Anakin picked up the chest and took it back to the starship silent except for giving the coordinates.