Chapter 17

Had it really only been 4 ½ hours since she found Piper on the bathroom floor? So much had happened; so much had changed in such a short time. She was a mom; she almost lost Piper; Piper had to have a hysterectomy. She couldn't get the image of a scared and crying Piper begging her to stay with her out of her mind. She was on her way to meet their son yet all she could see was Piper. She needed to see her and touch her to reassure herself that she was really okay. But first, Liam.

The doctor led her into the NICU and handed her off to one of the nurses. The nurse showed her how to wash her hands and gave her a gown to put over her clothes. Leading her to the back of the room, the nurse stopped them in front of a small bassinet. Peering in, the world fell away for Alex. She could no longer hear the beeping of monitors, the quiet footsteps or the nurse softly talking to her. All she could focus on was the tiniest being she had ever seen.

He was beautiful. He had a dusting of dark down all over his little head. Alex had been right, he had Piper's nose and chin. Perfect pink lips puckered in sleep. Two arms; two hands. Two tiny legs and two feet. Ten impossibly small fingers and toes. He was perfect. Alex's heart swelled and her body began to hum slightly. Her son. Her Blob.

"Can I touch him?" Alex asked

"Of course. Talk to him. He will know your voice. Let him know you're here."

With tears in her eyes and a trembling hand, she reached out and gently ran her fingertips over his head. Squirming, he turned his head towards her touch. "Just like Piper already" Alex thought. "Hey little man. Hi Liam. I'm here buddy. Mama's here. And Mommy will come for you soon. She needs to rest a little bit first. She loves you so much though, and she can't wait to come see you and hold you. I love you too little man."

Stroking his head, she moved her fingers over his cheek and down across his shoulders; down his arm to his little hand. Taking his hand between her fingers, she held on and continued talking to him. Alex felt him grip her finger and she broke out in a grin. "That's right little man, you hold on. Hold on to me, I won't let you go." Alex felt the fiercest desire to shelter and protect him rise up in her as she said those words. Falling in love with him was the easiest and most natural thing she had ever done.

"When can I hold him?" she asked a nurse that was passing by.

"If his numbers stay strong, you should be able to later tonight."

"You hear that buddy? Keep doing what you're doing and I'll hold you tonight." She crooned to him.

Her arms actually ached to hold him. She didn't think it would be like this. Until she laid eyes on him, she had still been scared; scared of everything he represented. Now the only thing she was scared of with him was not having him. She never imagined a love like this. So pure and all consuming; so selfless and complete. She loved Piper to the point of distraction, but not like this. This was completely different. It was a whole new level of love.

She stayed with him for about another hour, then she needed to see Piper. Snapping a quick picture with her phone, she bent to kiss him on the head and told him she would be back soon. She asked if she could send Polly in to sit with him while she was with Piper. She couldn't stand the thought of him being alone. The nurse told her typically it was immediate family only, but considering the circumstances she would allow it and for her to leave the name at the front.

Walking back towards the waiting room where everyone was, Alex stared at the picture of Liam. He truly was amazing. She couldn't wait for Piper to see him. Piper. At the thought of her, Alex's chest constricted and a sob wracked her body. Slamming a hand against the wall, she bent over fighting for control. She had to be strong; keep it together. Piper needed her. And now so did Liam.

Steeling herself, she wiped her eyes and went to the waiting room. Stopping just inside the doorway, she looked at all the people in there. These people who came out to help them celebrate the start of their family and were now waiting to hear something from her had become HER family. Maybe it happened slowly over time; maybe it just happened tonight. But she knew without a doubt that these were people she and Piper would need forever.

Stepping further into the room, Polly was the first person to notice her. She went to Alex and put her hands on her arms.

"He's…perfect Polly. Here, I took a picture for you guys." Alex said

Everyone gathered around then and they passed the phone around. "They said if his numbers stay good I can hold him later tonight. I've got to go be with Piper right now though." She told them. Turning to Polly, Alex asked "Will you please go be with him? He's so small. I don't want him to be alone." Alex could feel tears threatening again.

"Oh Alex, you don't even have to ask. Of course I will." Hugging her, Polly whispered "Kiss our girl for me and tell her I'm kicking her ass for this."

Alex cracked a smile and thanked Polly then made her way to the Critical Care Unit. The hallway seemed endless and the elevator ride took forever but Alex eventually found herself standing in front of the nurses station. Identifying herself and asking for Piper's room, the nurse directed her to room 604. Placing a hand on Alex's shoulder to stop her, the nurse asked to speak with Alex for a moment.

"She's sleeping right now. The recovery nurse told us that she got pretty upset and somewhat combative when they told her she couldn't see you or baby yet. They were afraid she was going to hurt herself so they had to sedate her. She lost a lot of blood and even though she received two bags of blood in the OR, she's still going to be very weak. The best thing for her is rest right now."

Alex nodded her understanding and went in search of her Piper. Finding the room, she hesitated at the door. Shoring up every ounce of strength she had, she quietly went into the room. Closing the door behind her, Alex waited a moment before turning around to face Piper.

The room was dimly lit from the small light above Piper's head. She was pale and had dark circles under her eyes. Even in sleep, her face was drawn in pain. An IV ran from her left hand and Alex could see wires from the heart monitor running out of her gown and attaching to a machine on the far side of the bed. She went to the side of the bed and softly stroked her hair. Leaning down, she pressed a tender kiss to Piper's mouth then gently placed her forehead against hers. "I'm here now baby. Everything's going to be ok now. I won't leave you again." Alex let herself stay there for a while just taking in the feel of her skin and feeling her breath across her face.

Forcing herself to move away from her, Alex went to the corner of the room and grabbed the lone chair. Dragging it up to the bed, she positioned it as close as she could get it and sat down. Taking Piper's hand in hers, she held on tight and began to talk to her. First she told her about Liam, how adorable and perfect he was; how much he weighed; the color of his hair; how she was right and he did have her chin and nose. She told her how much she instantly loved him.

"You were right, Kid. Aside from loving you, it's the most natural thing in the world." She whispered.

Alex continued talking to her into the night, with no reaction from Piper. She told her how much she loved and needed her; now more than ever. Eventually she started reliving their adventures together. She was in the middle of talking about Piper getting the virus in Java when her voice broke.

"Piper, please, please wake up. I need you. Liam needs you. I love you, now please just open your eyes. Please babe…"