Author's notes:

Thank you to master writer Sue Shay for her beta-reading, insight, and encouragement on this and other projects! Without Sue's help I would not have undertaken this story. Writing suspense is new for me, and her expert guidance has helped me with difficult parts in this chapter as well as the whole story.

I do not own the TV show The Mentalist and get no compensation from it. This story is written purely for entertainment purposes only.

Notes on the chapter title follow the end of the chapter.

Chapter 3: My Heart Stood Still

"Sir? Sir! You need to let go of her."

Jane sat beside Lisbon gripping her hand while tears poured down his cheeks. He stared at her face, its peaceful expression a stark contrast to the chaos around them. The EMTs jostled against him as they attended to Lisbon. Yet Jane had only a vague awareness of them.

"Sir! We need to use the defibrillator. You have to let go of her. Now!"

Still, Jane couldn't release Lisbon's hand.

I can't. I can't let go of Teresa.

"Jane, Jane! Let go of her. The EMTs need to work with Lisbon," said Cho as he yanked Jane away from Lisbon. With no support, her hand fell limp, palm up on the grass beneath her. At the same time, her head sagged to the turf, her neck twisted at an awkward angle.

The EMTs still took a few more moments to prepare the equipment. One EMT reached over to her body to rip open the blouse she was wearing. Once done with that, he placed the paddles on her chest. Jane cringed at the indignity of those actions but knew the EMT had no choice but to do it.

Without thinking, Jane began to reach for her again. Cho wrapped his arms around Jane's body to restrain him.

"Clear."

"Snap. Errrrrrrrrrw."

The defibrillator sent a shock through Lisbon. Jane winced at the violence when her body jerked upward then dropped back to the ground.

"Nothing," the lead EMT said as his team resumed a whirl of actions to ready another shock. Jane heard the dial click as they increased the juice.

Cho's grip loosened as Jane reached out again. His hand trembled as he touched Lisbon's cheek, running his fingers across her cold, damp skin. A thought that had lurked in the background of his mind charged to the front.

It's my fault she's laying here…

Jane had caused this horror. If he had stayed with her, Lisbon would not have gone looking for him. Instead, he would have stood beside her ready to help. Later they would share breakfast at the diner down the road. There the gentle tinkle of Teresa's laugh, one that she saved only for her moments alone with him, would accent the brightening skies to the east. When at last they left the diner they'd drive ahead of the sunrise back to Sacramento, tired but alive.

"Sir! Please move away."

The voice carried greater urgency than before, and Cho grabbed Jane tight enough to push air out of his lungs.

"Clear."

"Snap. Errrrrrrrrrw."

Lisbon's body jumped higher this time, only to descend again as a twisted mass of arms and legs. Amid all the bedlam her face remained placid. Jane looked for something, anything from Lisbon - a twitch, a grimace, a breath - but saw no signs of life.

"Nothing."

The EMTs glanced among themselves, then they barked out numbers. The mix of readings and settings they shouted to each other meant nothing to Jane, but the tone of their voices had changed in a way so slight that only someone who had often seen - and heard - crews working an emergency could detect. This is what we do when we're out of options. He sensed this would be the EMTs' last attempt to revive her with any hope of success. Too much time had passed already. Jane heard the lead EMT make even more clicks on the defibrillator controls while the others repositioned Lisbon's body for one more shock. From the corner of his eye Jane saw the EMT hunched beside him steal a look at his watch. Jane realized that he was already writing their case report in his head.

Teresa Lisbon was now the third…

Teresa Lisbon was now the third victim of Jane's thoughtlessness. First his arrogance had stirred Red John to murder Angela and Charlotte, and tonight his impulsiveness had left Lisbon floating face-down in a lake.

The three people dearest to him in life were gone because of him. Jane had barely survived losing his Angela and Charlotte years ago, and a deep ache had never left his heart since. Now he knew he would not survive the added pain of losing his Teresa.

Jane eased back on his own into Cho's arms. Cho's grasp itself differed from before, the strength that had held Jane back now gone. The two men slumped away from Lisbon and the EMTs as the final preparations ended.

"Clear."

"Snap. Errrrrrrrrrw."

Lisbon's body arced high in the air. As she dropped back to the ground her torso shifted to one side and her face tilted downward.

"Uhhhhh. Baaaa. Uhhh-uhhh."

Unbidden by the EMTs, water spilled out of Lisbon's mouth. Her head jerked upward while phlegm dribbled from her lips. As Jane marveled at the scene, Lisbon's eyes fluttered open to meet his own. Jane's heart leapt.

Teresa was alive!

"Let's go!"

The EMTs swung into action again to stabilize her. Jane sat hunched over, staring at Lisbon in wonder. He reached over to hold her hand in his. Her fingers gave the weakest of movements, but that was enough for Jane to break out in a smile. Around him the EMTs bumped into his shoulders, strapping a mask across Lisbon's face and bringing up a gurney. It didn't disturb him in the least. His best friend was back.

"Sir, we're ready to move her," the lead EMT said as he patted Jane's arm. Looking up at the man, Jane saw the hint of a smile. Cho, who had already stood up, extended his hand to Jane. He gladly accepted.

"On three. One. Two. Three." On the staccato cadence of the lead EMT, the team lifted Lisbon onto the gurney. With practiced speed they strapped her down for the bumpy trip to the parking lot.

Jane surveyed the renewed hubbub around him. The EMTs had pointed the gurney toward the hiking trail, local police were already scouring the area for clues, and Cho was on his phone.

"…Yeah, she's about ready for transport. You go to the hospital. All of us will meet up as soon as we can," Cho said into the phone.

"Van Pelt?" asked Jane.

"Yeah. She'll go to the hospital. Rigsby's coming out here. Someone should ride with Lisbon."

Jane acknowledged Cho's words with a nod and a smile.

"I'm with her."

"Good. We'll meet up at the hospital after Rigsby and I secure the operations here."

With that, Jane turned and sprinted after the gurney. The EMTs had already begun their slow trek along the trail. The wheels on the gurney clattered along as pebbles continually knocked them off their forward motion. The pace was slow but steady.

When Jane reached them, he looked at Lisbon. The oxygen mask that she wore obscured her face except for her eyes. But her eyes alone were enough to tell Jane that the whole scene had her bewildered. By instinct he clasped her hand in his again. Her eyes looked first to their hands then to his eyes, and Jane persuaded himself that they had brightened in response.

When at last the group reached the ambulance, one of the EMTs loading the gurney on board looked at Jane with disapproval when Jane grasped the handle bar to hoist himself into the rear cabin. In a flash, Jane thumped the CBI badge on his lapel and prayed that the man wouldn't inspect it too closely, in particular the word "Consultant." Jane caught a break; the man waved him aboard without a word.

"Sir. Did you know you were soaked?"

Only when he heard those words from the EMT did Jane consider his own condition. Looking at his water-logged clothes, he realized that his body had broken into an uncontrolled shiver.

"I didn't even think about it until you brought it up," Jane replied.

The EMT opened an overhead trunk to pull out two blankets. As he handed one to Jane he draped the other around Lisbon's body.

"Thanks," Jane said as he clutched his blanket close around himself.

Once he felt the engine on the ambulance rumble to life, Jane relaxed a little. At last, they were underway. The crackle of tires on gravel had never sounded sweeter to his ears.

Jane knew enough of medical sensors to tell that Lisbon, even if hurt, was at least stable. He watched the gentle, rhythmic rise and fall of her chest as she took in normal breaths of oxygen. Now when he held her hand he could feel the strength return to her grasp.

Suddenly the ambulance hit a pothole. By the way the whole rear cabin shuddered, Jane judged that it must have been the size of the Grand Canyon. A box of bandages flew across the space and landed with a thud beside the gurney. Dozens of mauve-colored strips littered the floor, but clean-up would wait until later. Seeing the mess all around them, the EMT and Jane looked at each other, smiled, and shook their heads.

"Um-um-um."

Lisbon's grunting prompted both men to redirect their gaze back to her. The oxygen mask had gone askew, the strap around one ear having snapped. With the adept nonchalance of a professional who had done it scores of times before, the EMT reached behind him without looking, opened a drawer, and pulled out a fresh mask. With his other hand, he pulled the defective one from around Lisbon's head.

Jane looked at Lisbon's full face for the first time since they had been lakeside. The blue tinge that had so frightened him before had vanished, replaced by a rosiness that colored her cheeks. Her eyes, the beautiful emerald orbs that he looked forward to seeing each day, met his.

Smiling up at him, Teresa Lisbon squeezed his hand. And winked.

To be continued.

Be sure to check out Sue Shay's current project, "Ready or Not," a great Jane-and-Lisbon romance!

Richard Rodgers and Lorenz Hart wrote "My Heart Stood Still" in 1927. While the lyrics of the song have little to do with the action of the chapter, the title fits. Ella Fitzgerald's version of the song from her landmark album Ella Fitzgerald Sings the Rodgers & Hart Songbook is a favorite recording. I leave it to the reader to decide whether the chapter title applies to Lisbon or Jane or both.

A reader asked if I were a musician. Sadly I'm not, but I have always enjoyed listening to a wide range of music. That range includes the genres used for chapter titles in this story - pop standards, country, and classical music.