Here it is, the last chapter of this story! As I already mentioned, I actually wanted it to be a oneshot, but I think four chapters aren't so bad as well. I hope you like this chapter and the ending, please let me know, that would be amazing! I also enjoyed writing about Percy and Apollo so much, I'm considering writing another oneshot/story in the future.
The song to the first part of this chapter is 'Spending My Time' by Roxette. And, simply because I adore this song, 'Does Heaven Even Know You're Missing?' by Nickelback for the last part.
I don't own the characters or places!
Percy wasn't sure how long he sat on the floor of his flat, face buried in his hands and cried. When the sun finally rose outside, he was still sitting there, the only difference that all his tears seemed to be wasted for now. When the sun normally had a calming effect on him, it only made him feel hollow now.
The conversation between Annabeth and Aphrodite repeated itself in Percy's head over and over. It didn't make him angry that another goddess had interfered in his life. It rather made him feel... sad. Tired. Resigned. He'd hoped that all of that would be over now, but it seemed like he was wrong.
The thought that Apollo might have known anything about all this made him feel sick. A part of him still refused to believe it, but how likely was it? He was a god. He was one of them. They talked. It was nearly impossible that Apollo didn't know anything at all about Aphrodite ruining his relationship with Annabeth.
But then the expression of horror on Apollo's face came back to his mind. How he'd visibly paled. The fear in his eyes, mixed with defeat. As if he'd already feared that one day, Percy would leave him like all the others did. That he'd even hate him. He'd even tried to swear that he didn't know anything about all of that, Percy knew that. However, he'd interrupted him before he could swear on the River Styx. Apollo had broken such an oath once. Percy didn't want to be the reason for that to happen again.
But maybe he really didn't know anything, the voice inside his head said. You could be wrong. Then you've hurt him for nothing.
Percy shook his head furiously. It couldn't be like that. Apollo must have known about it to some extent! Why would Aphrodite talk to Annabeth otherwise? She could have also just watched them being miserable together. She's the goddess of love, the annoying voice inside him whispered. Maybe that was her only reason.
He knew that sitting there and thinking about everything for much longer would only make him go crazy. But for a long time, Percy didn't find the strength to stand up. So he kept remain sitting on the floor despite it being slightly uncomfortable. He watched as clouds appeared in the sky outside, making the sun vanish. Somehow, he was glad about it.
When he finally forced himself to stand up, it was after midday. He made his way to the bathroom, deliberately refusing to look in the mirror, knowing that he must look horrible. After a quick shower, he still didn't feel better, but most probably, he was looking like a normal human being again, so it would have to do. He also considered eating something, but he'd lost his appetite. And there was something else he had to do first.
He found Annabeth sitting in front of a café in New Rome, together with a few people Percy recognized from when he'd accompanied her to one of her classes what felt like a lifetime ago. Annabeth noticed him first and stopped in her explanation about something that sounded far too mathematical. When the others noticed that she was distracted, they also turned around to face him. It made Percy feel slightly uncomfortable that he didn't even know their names.
"Percy, what happened?" Annabeth asked before he could open his mouth. Inwardly, he sighed. Of course she just knew by looking at him that something was wrong. Which shouldn't surprise him, most probably, he really looked terrible.
"Can we talk somewhere?" He asked, glancing at her companions uncomfortably.
To her credit, Annabeth didn't hesitate a single second. She just nodded, excused herself and as soon as she'd collected her books, she followed Percy through the streets. They didn't talk while they walked and he was glad about it. He didn't want to tell her about what happened with an audience. And they always had that, after everything they'd done, they weren't just heroes at Camp Half-Blood.
Since he didn't know where to go, he led her to the only place that made him feel somewhat comfortable. Luckily, at this time of the day there was no one at the lake. In the dim light of the day, the water looked grey instead of blue. In the distance, dark clouds were getting closer and Percy suspected that it was going to rain soon. Or maybe even a storm was coming?
"What's going on?" Annabeth asked in the silence surrounding them. "You look like hell, Percy." He must imagine the concern in her voice. "Is it about Nico and Will -"
"No." He interrupted her quickly, knowing that Hazel had informed her about everything that happened on their quest and afterwards. "I need to ask you something and you have to promise to be honest with me."
She nodded automatically. "What is it?"
"Did Aphrodite visit you?" He asked quickly, knowing that he surely wouldn't like the answer. But he had to know.
Annabeth paled and the sadness on her face told Percy what he needed to know even before she nodded. "Yes." Her voice sounded hoarse and she swallowed. "She did."
"Did you break up with me because of that?" He demanded to know. "Because she said we weren't right for each other?"
"It's not what you think, Percy." Annabeth sighed.
"And what do I think?" Slowly, the anger he couldn't feel back at home returned. He felt the urge to smash something.
"I've been thinking about it before she showed up. About us." It was a rare thing to see Annabeth search for the right words. "It felt different than before."
"Of course it did, after everything we've been through!" He snapped.
"It was different." Somehow, it made him even more furious that her voice was still so soft. "We were so young when we fell in love and so much happened ever since. I think we just grew up."
"Annabeth..." He shook his head, not knowing what to reply to that.
"Where's Apollo, Percy?" She asked quietly.
"Not here." In this moment, he knew that she'd figured out what happened. This time, she didn't even try to hide the sadness on her face.
"Oh Percy, no! He loves you!"
Somehow, her words made everything even worse. "He knew about it! Don't tell me otherwise! I hate it that the gods interfered again!"
"He didn't." Annabeth argued, but Percy already wasn't listening anymore. He clenched his fists and knew that behind him, the water of the lake began to move in soft waves. He had to get away from here before he did something he would regret later.
"You don't even know him!" He snapped and before she could reply, he ran away.
He knew that it was childish, but during the next days, Percy kept hiding in his flat. He skipped all his classes, pretending he was sick. Which he was, in a way. He just wasn't sure if heartbreak was a reason to stay at home. However, he didn't care.
He was angry at Aphrodite for manipulating Annabeth. He was mad at Annabeth for actually doing what the goddess wanted. He was mad at himself because he'd let himself be happy with Apollo. And of course he was angry at Apollo for not telling him about all this. Even if the voice inside his head which whispered that Apollo could have known nothing of it got louder with every day.
He was also incredibly sad. He missed Apollo like crazy. His cheerfulness, the fact that everything seemed to be so easy with him. How he'd always made the cold go away. How he made him happy. Because that's what he did, there was no denying it. He loved the sun god with all his heart. Even if it was broken now.
After four days of hiding, there was suddenly a knock on the door. Percy flinched violently, having sat on his couch in silence for most of the time. No one had visited him ever since his conversation with Annabeth and he suspected that she had something to do with it. However, he didn't care why no one came. He just wanted to be alone.
When the knocking on the door got louder, Percy realized that he didn't have a choice. If he didn't want whoever was there to kick in the door, he had to open it. In this moment, he was glad that he'd changed into clean clothes in the morning. "I'm coming!" He shouted and instantly, the knocking stopped.
A small part of him hoped that maybe, Apollo had come back to him. That he wanted to tell him this was all one big misunderstanding. Or that it had been just another bad dream. But when he opened the door, he realized that the young man with the blond hair and blue eyes wasn't the sun god, but his son.
Will and Nico had come to see him. And from the looks on their faces, they weren't happy at all.
"Percy, what happened?!" Nico asked as soon as his eyes fell on him, a frown on his face. "You look like shit."
"Good to see you too, Nico." Percy muttered and let them inside his flat, ignoring the way how Will's eyes narrowed when he saw the state it was in. Or wasn't in. In fact, Percy had been sitting on the couch ever since he'd sent Apollo away five days ago. Everything was a little dusty and if Percy was honest to himself, it looked like no one even lived inside the apartment. Which was unusual for him, considering that his place was always a mess.
"When was the last time you've eaten?" Will asked when his eyes wandered back to Percy, suddenly in full doctor mode. "You really don't look good." He glared at Nico, as if he wanted to remind his boyfriend to be nice.
Percy shrugged at this. "Why does it matter?" He'd expected many things when he found Nico and Will standing in front of his door, but not an interrogation.
"Percy, we're worried about you." Will's voice was patient and in this moment, he reminded Percy so much of his father that he couldn't help himself. He sank back down onto the couch with a sigh.
"I'm fine." He muttered, but even in his own ears it sounded weak. Deep inside, he knew that he couldn't sit in his flat all alone forever and wait for his problems to solve themselves. So maybe it wasn't such a bad thing that his friends were here now.
"You're absolutely not." Nico sat down next to him, a look of concern on his face.
"Why are you here?" Did Annabeth contact them? Or maybe even...? He refused to think of him right now.
"We wanted to check on you. We didn't hear from you for nearly week." Will explained slowly and Percy began to feel cold inside. That could mean only one thing.
"You mean that A- he didn't show up at Camp Half-Blood for days?" He corrected himself quickly, not wanting to say Apollo's name.
The way Will and Nico exchanged a look confirmed it. "Normally, he shows up every few days. Or he sends a message when he can't come. We were wondering if you know what's going on." Will said hesitantly. "But from the way you look, I assume that you also didn't see Dad in days?"
Percy swallowed, not sure what to say. Not sure if he could say it again. "He... I... we had a fight."
"Do you want to talk about it?" Will asked softly, his voice full of sympathy. But there was also something else he was good at hiding. Sadness. Apparently, he could already imagine what happened.
"I don't, but I suppose I have no choice." So he told them the full story. About his dreams. The things Aphrodite said to Annabeth which led to their breakup. His conversation with Apollo and how the god denied to know anything about it. How Percy had sent him away in the end. Nico and Will listened silently the entire time.
"I'm not sure if this helps in any way, but he really loves you." Will said in the end. "You're all he ever talks about." The son of Apollo hesitated. "And I don't think he knew anything about Aphrodite's doings. He rarely talks to the other gods anymore after his time as Lester. He says he doesn't feel well around them."
He'd told Percy the same. However, it was hard to believe. "Don't you think they would have talked about it? I mean, it's about him. Aphrodite did this for him."
"Are you suggesting that my Dad would give something like that his blessing?" The look on Will's face was stern now. Something else that reminded him of Apollo.
Percy sighed. "Deep inside, I think I know he'd never do that. But..."
"Now that you have doubts, it feels impossible to make them go away." Nico finished his sentence with a nod. "Understandable, considering your former experience with gods."
"Dad would never have let Aphrodite do something like that." Will added sternly. "He's changed. He would never hurt someone on purpose, especially not to get what he wants."
"I don't know what to do." Percy buried his face in his hands. "I can't get those thoughts out of my head. That they'd manipulated my life again."
"But you were happy." Nico threw in softly. "Apollo made you happy." It was the first time one of them said his name. Somehow, Percy knew that it wouldn't make a difference. Even if he knew they were talking about him, he'd never listen. Not after everything that Percy said to him.
"I've never been as happy as with him." He agreed quietly.
"Does it matter, then? If he knew?"
"I hate you, Nico." Percy muttered.
"He was about to swear on the River Styx that he didn't know about it, wasn't he?" Percy had let out that part of his conversation with Apollo, but by now, Will knew his father well enough to guess such things.
"I think he was." He looked up slowly. "I didn't let him. He shouldn't make promises he can't keep."
"Ever since he returned to Olympus, he always kept his promises." Will crossed his arms. "Percy... do you still love him?"
He frowned. "Of course I do. I'm miserable because of all this!"
"Then you should talk to him. Figure things out. You overreacted. It's only human. He'll understand."
"I said some pretty hurtful things." He threw in. "And if he really knew -"
"He doesn't." Will interrupted him firmly.
"If he really knew what happened, I'm not sure if I can even forgive him." Percy ended his sentence, ignoring Will's words.
"You're so stupid!" Nico hit him on the arm. "You love him. He loves you with all his being. He respects you in a way no one else ever did. He's so careful with you, sometimes it's hard to look at. Even I know that Apollo would never do that to you. I'm sure he'd have watched silently if you'd stayed together with Annabeth. Because that's what he did for the first months after he came back."
For a moment, Percy forgot to feel hurt. He only stared at Nico in surprise, just like Will. "I love you." The son of Apollo whispered and leaned in to kiss his boyfriend.
Nico chuckled. "Why do you both look so surprised? I notice things." He entwined his hand with Will's.
"I think we both forgot for a moment just how attentive you are." For the first time in days, Percy smiled. "I'm still not sure if he'd even be willing to talk to me."
Could it be this easy? Could he just talk to Apollo and ask the god if he'd really known about Aphrodite's plans? Would Apollo be honest with him? He was also the god of truth, but that didn't have to mean anything. He could lie like everyone else.
"You're still overthinking everything." Nico ripped him out of his thoughts. "I know it's hard, but you have to trust Apollo with this."
Percy sighed again. "I want to, really. But anyway..."
"Maybe you should think about something else for a while." Will said suddenly, standing up and pulling Nico with him. "You need to eat and since I'm sure your fridge is empty, we could get a few things and cook together."
"I'm not even hungry." He protested, but Will only glared at him.
"Did you even eat anything since you had that argument?"
Percy tried to think about it, but he wasn't sure. So he only shrugged.
The son of Apollo nodded as if he'd already expected it. "Fine. I'll go to the store and get us something and once I'm back, we'll cook together. As long as I'm gone, Nico will keep you company." Without waiting for a reply, Will left his flat.
Percy and Nico sat there in silence for a few moments. In the end, it was Nico who spoke. "There's this new hilarious TV show. Maybe we could watch an episode until Will returns."
"Sounds good." He agreed slowly and soon, they were both laughing and making fun of people in the show. For the first time in days, Percy felt a little lighter. His problems were still there, but it felt good to ignore them for some time.
Nico and Will stayed the night at Percy's flat. Unfortunately, Percy couldn't enjoy their presence for long. Right after dinner, he fell asleep on the couch. Apparently, being awake for days and not having eaten finally took its toll. He slept for a whole night without dreams, which was the only good thing about it. It was also the reason why Percy dreaded sleep, fearing that he might get really bad nightmares.
When he woke up in his bed the next morning (or rather at midday), he was confused, until he heard familiar voices coming from the kitchen. When he realized that most probably, Will and Nico had brought him to bed, he felt a pang of disappointment. But at the same time, he was also grateful to have such great friends.
He found out that Nico had already visited Hazel in the morning, while Will had stayed at Percy's place in case he woke up. The son of Apollo didn't mention it, but Percy suspected that he'd also prayed to his father, wanting to know if he was alright. From the disappointed look on Will's face that appeared when he thought no one was looking, Percy took that Apollo didn't answer.
Of course Will had prepared breakfast/lunch, which Percy accepted gladly. Only now did he realize how bad he'd felt sitting around and doing nothing for days. He still felt incredibly sad and worried about Apollo, but at least his appetite had returned.
Will and Nico spent the day with him at Camp Jupiter. They walked around a bit, visited a few friends and talked very much. However, no one mentioned Apollo again. It felt like an unspoken agreement between them and secretly, Percy was glad about it. Yes, he had to figure out what he'd do about Apollo, but it could wait a few more hours.
In the evening, Nico and Will had to return to Camp Half-Blood. They promised to keep in touch and contact him as soon as there were news about Apollo. In return, Percy had to promise to visit them the next week since there would be a break from his classes.
"Never forget that he loves you." Will said right before they had to leave. "I can say for certain that he didn't know a single thing about Aphrodite's plan to get in between you and Annabeth. He's not like that. And I think deep inside, you know that as well."
When Nico shadow-travelled them back to New York and Percy was left alone in his flat, he kept staring at the shadows where they'd vanished for a long time. In the end, he sighed deeply and went to bed.
Only that nightmares were haunting him. He saw Lester dying a dozen different ways again. Then his dream shifted to the look of hurt, fear and desperation on Apollo's face, right before Percy said he wanted him to leave.
When he woke up screaming Apollo's name that night, nothing happened. His flat remained quiet and the bed next to him cold. He cried the whole night, not able to find sleep again and the image of Apollo's face still vivid on his mind.
During the next days, he tried to figure out what to do. Or rather what to think. He couldn't forget Will's and Nico's words. If he was being honest with himself, Percy had to admit that he agreed with them. He knew Apollo would never hurt him. That he'd never betray him in such a way. If he'd known about Aphrodite's plan, he'd have tried to talk her out of it. Because that's how he was. A good person. Kind and caring. Always trying to do the right thing.
But there was still the part of him that was having doubts. He was a god, after all. And all they'd ever done in Percy's life was causing trouble. He'd been hurt too many times because of a god to just be able to forget everything that happened.
The day before he'd travel to Camp Half-Blood, he was sitting at the lake, watching the reflection of the sun on the water. Hazel and Frank had invited him to help with training the new recruits, but he wasn't in the mood. He rather wanted to be alone, because that's all he seemed to be good at right now.
"Staring at the water has never solved any problems." A voice behind his back said suddenly, making him turn around in surprise.
Annabeth was smiling, but he knew her well enough to see concern in her eyes. "Do you mind if I join you for a bit?"
He shook his head. "Not at all. Make yourself comfortable."
She sat down in the grass next to him and stared at the lake. "I'm sorry." She said quietly. "For not telling you about Aphrodite. I know I shouldn't have kept it secret. I wasn't aware that it could cause so much trouble later on."
"You don't have to apologize." He threw in and surprisingly, he meant it. "You couldn't have known what will happen."
"I know this must look like Apollo knew about it." Annabeth's voice was calm. "After all, the gods always stick together and stuff. But I'm sure he didn't know."
"Let me guess, you thought about it logically and came to that conclusion?" He raised his eyebrows and her lips twitched.
"I would love to say yes to that, but this time, the answer is much easier." She began to play with a strand of her hair thoughtfully. "He's changed very much during his trials. He's not like the other gods anymore. He cares. And he loves you deeply, Percy."
"Annabeth -" He began, but she shook her head shortly, signalling him not to interrupt.
"I noticed it long before Aphrodite showed up. That something had changed between us. We weren't the same people anymore as back when we first fell in love. Too many things happened. Things that changed both of us. You even more than me." When he wanted to talk again, she held up her hand. "Don't say you've loved me, I don't doubt that, seaweed brain." Again, her lips twitched. "I knew you needed more than I could give you. The goddess only showed up after many weeks of doubts. Weeks in which I realized that maybe, I also wanted something else."
"So you mean that you didn't break up with me because of her words, but because you simply realized that it wasn't working anymore?" He asked, staring at her in disbelief.
Annabeth nodded. "I couldn't even do such a simple thing as talking about my nightmares anymore, knowing that you might also get caught in all the bad memories."
"We'd always dealt with that together."
"We were enduring it together. That is something else than dealing with it." Her grey eyes narrowed thoughtfully. "Tell me one thing. Since you got together with Apollo, do you still have those dreams every night?" He tried not to feel guilty when he shook his head. But Annabeth only nodded, as if he'd just answered a very complex question. "He's good for you."
"I'm not sure if I haven't ruined all of that." He muttered, looking down at his hands.
"Considering everything you've been through, he'll accept an apology." Annabeth's voice turned suspicious. "You are going to apologize, aren't you?"
"I miss him like crazy." He muttered.
"But you're still not sure that he's completely innocent in all this mess?" Annabeth hit his arm much harder than Nico did. "You can be so stupid at times, Percy! You have to trust him! Forget that he's a god, it doesn't matter anyway. What matters is that you make each other happy. And he'd never betray you."
"Nico basically told me the same." He rubbed his arm absent-mindedly. "I love him. And I want to trust him. It's just not that easy."
Her expression softened. "I know that. But you have to forget the past. It doesn't matter anymore."
He sighed deeply. "I'm really being an idiot, right?"
Annabeth nodded with a slight smile. "You are." She stood up. "Once you're in New York, figure out a way to talk to Apollo. I'm sure it will make everything better."
"Thank you." He smiled back at her shyly. "For doing all this for me. You know, despite everything that happened."
"That's what friends are for. I'll see you around, Percy." With another wave, she left.
He stared at the water for a few more minutes before he also made his way back to New Rome. After all, he had to pack his things for the trip to New York.
Unfortunately, no one at Camp Half-Blood had heard of Apollo ever since he had the fight with Percy, which was about two weeks ago now. His children were worried, but Will always kept them from asking too many questions. It relieved Percy to know that Will and Nico didn't tell anyone about his argument with the sun god.
The conversation with Annabeth had somewhat cleared his mind. In hindsight, he felt stupid for ever believing that Apollo could do something like this to him. That he would let someone ruin his relationship just so he could have Percy for himself. The voice inside his head with the doubts was still there, but he was successful in telling it to shut up by now.
He only hoped that Apollo could forgive him for all the things he'd said.
But for that, he had to be able to talk to him first. Which wasn't that easy, as it turned out. He'd tried to call Apollo dozens of times, but there was no answer. He knew that Will and even Nico were also doing the same, but without any results. It was like the god ignored all of them on purpose. From Grover, he got to know that Apollo also didn't show up at Palm Springs in nearly three weeks, something which was quite unusual.
It was like he'd vanished completely. And it was driving Percy crazy.
He tried to make himself useful at Camp Half-Blood. He taught sword fighting and he helped the younger campers to learn how to swim. However, none of those activities were able to calm his mind. And then there was also the fact that he didn't tell his family about him being in New York. He didn't want to tell his mother what happened with Apollo. He knew that she'd never judge him, but he felt somewhat ashamed for not believing in him.
At night, he was still haunted by the same horrible dreams and every time he woke up with his face covered in tears, he hoped that Apollo might show up. But everything stayed dark inside his cabin. He was all alone.
When his time to return to California got closer, Percy began to feel even more uneasy. He wasn't sure if he could continue his studies as if everything was normal. As if his life still had a sense. Because it felt like Apollo had taken it with him when he left.
One day, he was standing at the beach and looked into the sky. "I'm not sure if you're even listening to the things I say, but I want to apologize. I need to apologize. I was hurt and angry. All my life, you gods have been messing with me. I just freaked out, even if I had no reason for that. I see it now. If you would just give me a chance to explain... I miss you, Apollo. More than anything."
In the distance, someone called his name. Most probably, he was late for his sword fighting lessons. "Seems like I have to go." He hesitated. "I love you." With that, he turned around and went to where Nico was already waiting for him.
That night, he couldn't find any sleep. He kept turning in bed restlessly. In the end, he realized that it wouldn't be of any use. So he did the only thing that would give him at least some peace of mind. He got dressed and went outside.
He didn't come far when someone said his name. "Perseus Jackson." The voice sounded slightly familiar and from the way he was addressed with his full name, he knew that it wasn't one of his friends.
When he stopped and turned around slowly, he saw a girl of about thirteen years leaning against a tree. She had short, dark hair and silver-grey eyes. Even if she wouldn't have carried a bow, Percy would have known who was standing in front of him immediately. She resembled her brother too much.
"Lady Artemis." He said, not able to hide his surprise.
There was a thin smile on Artemis' lips, though it didn't reach her eyes. They were looking seriously at Percy. "I think we should stop with all this polite nonsense, considering that you've broken my brother's heart."
Even if he'd already expected what this visit was about, his mouth turned dry. "I... I didn't mean to."
"You didn't mean to." Artemis' voice was still calm. "He's been crying on my shoulder for weeks now. And you say you didn't intend to hurt him?"
Percy flinched at her words. "I was scared and lashed out. I've tried to apologize ever since."
"Do you really expect him to listen to your words?" She raised her eyebrows.
"No." He replied honestly and for half a second, he thought that he could see surprise on her face. But it vanished just as fast as it appeared, so he wasn't sure if it was just his mind playing tricks on him. "But I have to try anyway. I love him."
"I see that you mean it." Artemis looked thoughtful. "For some reason I don't understand, my brother loves you too. He's always had such a soft heart. When I first heard of what you did to him, I considered to strike you down with an arrow. Do you want to know what kept me from doing it?"
Unable to say anything, Percy nodded. He knew that he couldn't do anything if the goddess decided that she wanted to end his life. Most probably, he'd also deserve it.
"Apollo made me promise not to hurt you." Artemis explained. "'It's not his fault', he said. 'I understand why he said those things.'" She wrinkled her nose. "He's always been far too soft."
"He's too good for me." Percy muttered, suddenly feeling incredibly tired. "He shouldn't protect me when it's clearly my fault."
The goddess still looked thoughtful, her silver-grey eyes so different from Apollo's golden ones. "You really regret your actions."
He laughed without humour. "I've regretted everything the moment he left."
"And yet it took you so long to reach out to him." Artemis pointed out. "Listen to me closely, Percy. He didn't know anything of Aphrodite's actions. He would never tolerate such behaviour. At least not anymore. He's a hopeless romantic and always thinks that you find your way to each other, if it's meant to be. You are clearly meant to be together, even if you needed a little help at first." When he began to protest, she held up her hand, making him fall silent at once. "I won't say that Aphrodite did the right thing. She's started wars in the name of love, only because she thought two people were suited for each other. But she meant well." Suddenly, she grimaced. "I never thought that I would ever give anyone relationship advice."
"Tell me where he is. Or how I can reach him." Percy pleaded, encouraged by her words. "I need to talk to him."
"Do you think he wants to see you?" She quirked an eyebrow. "He would have surely appeared if that was the case."
"No, he wouldn't." He muttered sadly. "As you already said, I've broken his heart. Please, I need to apologize." He didn't consider his next words for long. "Maybe then he'll also stop bothering you with his problems."
He already feared that he'd overstepped, but to his surprise, Artemis laughed. "You can't even imagine how often I'd held him while he cried during the centuries." But then she turned serious again. "Fine, I will tell you where to find him. But it's not my fault if he does send you away." She took a step closer towards him. "And if you ever hurt him again, I won't just shoot you with an arrow. Understood?"
He swallowed dryly and nodded. "I'll never hurt him again."
She looked at him through narrowed eyes for a few moments, but then she nodded. "I see that you mean it." Suddenly, she looked at the sky. "If you hurry, you can still meet him today."
When she told him about Apollo's whereabouts, Percy could only stare at her. "He likes to watch the sunrise there." Artemis shrugged. "Even if we're twins, I don't understand him at times." Suddenly, she looked rather hesitant. "I wish you luck, Percy Jackson. Make him happy."
And just like that, she vanished.
The only thing he managed to do before he called Mrs. O'Leary was so scribble a short note for Nico and Will, which he pinned to the door of the Hades cabin. He knew that they would find it in the morning. He wasn't sure how long his trip to find Apollo would take.
Percy had always known that the best points to watch the sunrise were mostly on mountains or hills. Or close to the ocean. Or, in this case, both. Inwardly, he wanted to curse at Apollo for choosing such a place to sit and think, but he held himself back, not wanting to alert the god in any way. Even if Artemis was convinced he'd find Apollo here, a part of him still feared that it was only a dead end.
He'd heard many stories about South Africa being a magical place, especially the Cape of Good Hope. From what Annabeth told him, it was one of the most beautiful places on earth, one that she wanted to see some day, despite it being dangerous for a demigod to visit such locations.
When Percy arrived together with Mrs. O'Leary, he wasn't sure if Annabeth had been right about the place being magical. The weather was already warm and he knew that it wouldn't take long until the sun would rise. But aside from that, it was just another place close to the ocean. And surely Annabeth had wanted to see the places made for tourists, not the mountains, like Percy was. Because that was what he was doing. Climbing up a mountain, knowing that Apollo would surely sit on its highest place.
When the sun finally appeared in the distance, Percy could make out a distant figure sitting on a rock. His heart skipped a beat when he noticed the blond hair, looking slightly chaotic from the wind. Apollo. He was here.
Even as he approached, the sun god didn't turn around to face him. Surely, he already knew about Percy's presence, but he didn't let it show. He didn't even react when Percy sat down next to him, leaving a distance between them. It worried him to see the god so still.
"It's a beautiful place." He said and in this moment, he meant it. Now that he was sitting next to Apollo again, it felt like for the first time in weeks, Percy could finally breathe again. Like he could relax. He'd never fully understood when people said that home could also be a person until this very moment.
When Apollo didn't reply immediately, he was worried that he'd made a mistake by coming here. That maybe, the sun god would just vanish again without a word, leaving Percy all by himself. "I like to come here. It's peaceful." Jut a few words out of Apollo's mouth, but Percy felt himself release the breath he didn't know he'd been holding.
"It is." He agreed, but his eyes weren't on the landscape.
"What are you doing here, Percy?" Apollo sounded incredibly tired and when he turned his face to look at him, he noticed that his appearance reflected that. Dark rings under his eyes, pale skin, his hair was a mess. His eyes were even a little red, as if he'd been crying. You did this to him, the voice inside his head said.
"I came here to apologize." He said simply. "Or beg for your forgiveness, or whatever else is necessary to make you understand that I didn't mean all the things I said."
The way Apollo looked at him made his heart ache. The usual tenderness in his eyes was missing. Instead, his face was just distant and cold. "You meant them at that time." Apollo sighed. "I can't even blame you."
"I was unfair to you." Percy argued softly. "Deep inside, I knew you'd never do that to me. But with everything that happened in the past..." He ran a hand through his hair. "I know it's not much of an excuse. I should have trusted you."
"As you said, gods have been playing with you all your life. It might be a lame excuse, but I get it." He knew that Apollo tried to hide the pain in his eyes, but Percy saw it anyway.
"I was just so angry when I found out about Aphrodite speaking to Annabeth. I didn't even..." He shook his head and felt mad at himself when there was a familiar wetness in his eyes. He wouldn't cry, not now! "I'm sorry. I would understand if you can't forgive me." Despite all his efforts, a single tear found its way down his cheek. He wanted to wipe it away, but Apollo was faster. His touch was hot on Percy's skin.
"Don't cry, please." Apollo's voice sounded hoarse. "I can't stand to see you sad."
"I'm fine." The lie was obvious. "I just... damn, Apollo. I missed you like crazy!" Normally, Percy wasn't good with feelings. He liked to show them with actions rather than with words. But in this moment, he knew that he didn't have a choice. "Those past weeks have been like torture. No, wait, I can deal with that. They were worse than torture could ever be. Without you, it's like there's this big hole in my heart. It's like I'm not even really there. I try to live my life, but it's all so... dark. Like you took the sun with you." Now more tears were running down his cheeks, but he didn't bother to wipe them away. "I'm incomplete without you. And the worst thing was that I couldn't even be mad at anyone except for myself. Because I pushed you away. I didn't believe you. Because I'm just a stupid -"
"Alright, stop it." Apollo interrupted him firmly. "You're not stupid." Did he just imagine it or was there a little more gold in his eyes than only moments before? "You also shouldn't blame yourself."
"I said some horrible things." He cut in. "You're not like the other gods. Not at all."
"I forgive you." Those words were spoken so softly, they made Percy stare at him with wide eyes.
"You... forgive me? But why? I broke your heart!" Apollo flinched at this, but his expression remained calm.
"We had an argument. A misunderstanding." When the sun god reached out to wipe away the tears again, Percy closed his eyes. "I shouldn't have left."
"You only did what I asked you to." He muttered weakly.
"I've never done something as difficult in my entire existence as leaving you." When he opened his eyes again, Apollo's face was only inches away from his own. He looked serious. "It took all my willpower to leave and not come back instantly."
"You went to Artemis." He guessed, cursing inwardly for his big mouth. But Apollo just nodded.
"So she told you where to find me."
"She also said many other things." Percy said. "Like telling me that I'm stupid. Which Nico and Will also did, by the way. And Annabeth. Your sister is very protective of you, though."
"She is." Apollo agreed, a thoughtful look on his face. "I've missed you too, Percy. You weren't the only one feeling incomplete during the past two weeks." The fact that Apollo felt the connection between them as well made his heart beat faster.
"So why didn't you come back? When you've forgiven me?" He asked, needing to hear an answer to that question.
Suddenly, Apollo looked incredibly insecure. "I wasn't sure if you wanted me to." He sounded so small in this moment, Percy's heart broke all over again.
"Of course I did. I've been miserable without you." He wanted to reach out and take Apollo's hands, but held himself back in the last moment. "So you didn't hear all the times I've called your name? Or Will and your other children. They've been worried."
"I tried not to listen too closely." Apollo muttered. "It was too painful."
"I hate that I caused you pain." This time, Percy reached out to take Apollo's hands. They were incredibly warm in contrast to his own. Something he'd missed in the past weeks. Without Apollo, he'd always been feeling cold.
"I really didn't know about Aphrodite's plans." Apollo stared at their entwined hands. "I swear it on the River Styx." There it was. The promise he'd refused to let Apollo make the first time around. It could have been so easy if Percy wouldn't have interrupted him back at his flat. If he'd just let him speak. It could have prevented so much sorrow and pain.
Before he knew what was happening, he'd begun to sob loudly and then warm arms were wrapped around him, pulling him to Apollo's chest. It felt all so familiar and comforting and just right that it made him sob even louder.
"Don't cry, love. I'm here. I love you. I won't let anything get between us ever again." Apollo kept whispering into his ear and when Percy was finally able to calm down, they just looked at each other for some time. Apollo's cheeks were also wet and Percy vowed that it would be the last time he made the god cry.
"I love you too." He said seriously and then he pulled Apollo closer to kiss him. It was a messy kiss, with lips tasting salty from all the tears, but Percy didn't mind. In fact, kissing Apollo had never felt better. In this moment, he felt like he'd come home.
"I'm sorry." Percy whispered again when they parted. "For everything."
"No need to apologize." Apollo wrapped his arms around Percy's waist. "But I think I should have a nice chat with Aphrodite soon."
"She only meant well." He was surprised to hear the words out of his own mouth. "Annabeth wanted to leave me before Aphrodite showed up in the first place."
This seemed to take Apollo by surprise. "She did?! I mean, not that I complain, but she did?"
"Guess we were not right for each other." He smiled at the sun god. "But we are. I know this will sound cheesy, but I've never believed in soulmates before. Maybe I should reconsider."
Apollo's eyes were completely golden now. "You know, if you keep saying those things, I'll never want to let you go again."
"Sounds great." He pressed his lips against Apollo's again. He knew that with forever, the god meant something else, something so huge Percy couldn't even fully process. But he knew that they'd also find a solution for that. Because he had no intention of ever letting Apollo go again.