I'm sorry for it to have taken so long - again! It doesn't quite help when your usb stick breaks (and every single chapter is on that certain usb stick as you tend to write at work or other computers). It kind of makes you lose your mojo. That being said - this chapter is finally, finally here, but the next might take a while as well, so you guys are all warned. I haven't written it yet, and as it's Nanowrimo and time to work extra (again), I tend to be busy with other stuff than writing on this story.
That being said, I love you guys. I love you supporting me still. I would like to thank my everending patient beta Writtenincrayon again for still sticking up with me. Also, thank you all to the new followers - it truly makes my day to see the appreciation in this story through that. Also many thanks to Sarah, Ember411, MrsWemmaMorrison and Jessdance34, for the lovely comments! I love comments to death (so go ahead and make me very, very happy with reviewing, even if it is constructism! Nobody can ever have enough of that) and it makes me happy when one pops into my inbox.
If you have suggestions, tips, ideas, constructism or want to poke me into writing - feel free to do so. You can send me a message here, or on tumblr (inekepp or talktomrsemmaschuester (though I look more on the latter, as it's a Talking Gleeks RP account). I'll make sure to always message back (if you're off anon, anyway, and you send something to the latter).
Without furder ado, the next chapter!
I didn't know what I was expecting when I walked to our bathroom. What I did know, was that it was the longest walk I'd ever taken in my entire life. Or, at least, it felt like it. It was a moment where my -our, lives could change forever, with only one glance at a stick. I knew I had told Emma that it didn't matter if she wasn't pregnant, but I also knew that I wanted nothing more than to have a child with her. Now might not have been the right time, but I knew that I'd be over the moon if she was. It'd be like a dream come true.
I picked up the test without looking, however. It felt wrong somehow to look at the results without Emma being right there next to me. I was itching to turn it over and stare at the sign, but waited until I had re-entered the bedroom. She was sitting there, anxiously, asking what the results were.
'I realised that it felt wrong to look without you being there with me,' I said. She nodded, but I noticed that she had started wringing her hands at that moment. 'Or, at least, in the same room.' I gave her another look, while she nodded as if to give me permission to turn the test over. So I did.
'It's negative.' The words had flown out of my mouth before I myself had even realised what the results were. But it was true. One, small, tiny line with no hint of even a second.
'So I'm not pregnant,' she said. My gaze travelled towards her.
'Apparently not.' I put down the test on my bedside table and sat down beside her. 'But that's okay, right?' Emma slowly nodded, and I could sense that there was something bothering her.
'I suppose so.' I frowned. There was definitely something bothering her.
'But?' I pressed.
'It might sound stupid but… I suppose that somehow I really wanted it now, and now I'm just kind of disappointed, you know?' I slowly nodded. I felt the same way, but I also knew that, with her workload at the moment, being pregnant surely wouldn't have helped the case.
'I know, Em. But being stressed surely wouldn't have helped the case. We'll have plenty of opportunities to get pregnant, okay? Don't beat yourself up over it. You need your rest as well.' Emma slowly nodded and moved to lie under the covers again. I quickly followed, turning off the light in the progress, and snuggled up right next to her.
'Night, Will,' she said softly, turning around and burying her face into my chest, while wrapping her arms around me.
'Night, Em,' I answered, pressing a kiss to her head, before quickly dozing off.
That day I noticed a difference in Emma. She seemed to be a lot more quiet than usual, talking only if needed and working very hard on all the paperwork she still had left to do. I knew to let her be while she was at work, but I deemed it a good idea to talk to her when we got home. I wouldn't pressure her, though. It seemed right to try and make her feel loved Okay, I wanted to pamper her and not only because of all the stress, but also to make her feel that I was really okay with this all. That she shouldn't be beating herself up over everything. That she just had to relax, enjoy everything and feel loved. Relaxing was surely a thing she'd need right now, as she worked so hard that I was sure she'd manage to work away everything she had still to do and get right back on track of her plans again. It made me worried, that was for certain, but I knew I shouldn't dwell. She'd tell me eventually and pressing might not have been a good thing to do tonight, but it could be somewhere this week.
And that I did.
When we got home that day, I drew her a bath and went to make dinner while she relaxed. I went all overboard, but I didn't care. She deserved this and she really needed to be taken care of today, even if I knew that she didn't always like that. But she didn't complain today. Maybe it was tiredness, maybe because she realised that she needed this, but I didn't mind at all. After dinner we just relaxed in front of the fireplace, holding one another and just e enjoying each other's company without saying a thing. Eventually, we went to bed, though we weren't quite busy with falling asleep at first, opting for decorating the floor with clothes instead, but that was also okay. Talking was something that could be done at a later time. It could wait. For now, just being in a state of bliss, was fine with me.