A/N: Sooooo I am sorry about the long delay. I have first of all been dealing with writers block... Well then I went through my notes for this story and remembered the direction I was going, so yay for that. Second it will take a while to finish this story because I have honestly been dealing with family stuff. I haven't the time to write like I used to for my other stories. So I will post whenever I get a chance so please bare with me on this. So anyways I hope that you like this chapter. It was actually hard to write but here it is for you guys. Another thing is I am super sorry if this one isn't as long as the other chapters. I will try my hardest to get the other chapters longer, unless some of you would rather them come shorter... Some people like that and I am not sure why lol. Anyways read and review... please let me know what you think :)
Awkward would be the only good way to describe the way it was between them the next day. The air swirled with many mixed emotions. First and foremost, Donny was happy that Liez was back in the room with him. He couldn't help himself from reacting to her presence like a giddy boy at Christmas. She had returned to his side so he was satisfied about that simple fact. Once she walked into his hospital room he wore a big goofy grin over his wide lips. He couldn't help himself. He was just so entirely happy by her presence. He couldn't wait for them to be back to normal. He couldn't even wait for her to get close enough so he could smell her soft scent of the soap she washed with. He just couldn't wait for Liez in general.
Yet, that was not the only emotion floating around the room making things so strange between the two of them. While he was ecstatic about her, she was a ball of different emotions that mirrors his darkly. When she had entered, her face wore the saddest expression he had ever seen. Her dark amber eyes which usually churned with life and love, was only dark and dulled by the way she felt towards him. When he had first seen her enter, he had to clench his jaw to keep his mouth shut. She looked so distressed that he just wanted to tell her that he was sorry and that he had lied to her about the woman back at home. If only he had it in him to utter the truth to her.
Then there was the anger. He knew about the way she used her scalpel today that she was angry with him. For the life of him he wouldn't allow himself to let her know she was hurting to the hell out of him today. So he sat there staring at the ceiling with his jaw clenched as tightly as he possibly could. The scalpel sank into his skin again and again, and he tried to not cry out in pain every time it did.
The most awkward emotion of all though was that friendly love that they felt for each other was stronger than ever. Maybe it was like this because they had had their first fight? That had to be it. He knew so. They had survived their first tussle among one another and all it had done was bring them closer. Or maybe it brought them apart? No! He refused to believe that it had brought them apart. It only made them closer to one another.
He lowered his head so he could look at her when she worked. Her face looked detached from emotion like it usually was when she was scraping away dead flesh. Her eyes though were cold, and he could always read her eyes. "Liez, are you alright?" he asked suddenly, having to know what was wrong with her. He asked even though he should have known what was wrong with her, in fact he did, he just wanted to hear from her mouth what the problem was.
"I am fine." she voiced as she never looked away from what she was doing. Carefully, but with pressure so she could make him feel that she was angry with him, she pulled the scalpel towards herself under dead flesh. She cut a little into new flesh and he jumped in pain. Usually she would apologize, but all she did was pull away the dead flesh and sat the scalpel down. She took a piece of gauze and lay in on top of the spot on his leg that was bleeding now bleeding because of her. Her face never showed an ounce of remorse for making him bleed. He knew there was something wrong, but he had never seen her so detached to him.
In some areas, the skin was dark, but she had managed to remove every ounce of blackened skin, now she was just removing dead skin. Some flesh was turning pink with blood flow and he stared down at himself with disgust. He thought he looked bad with charred flesh… Well seeing himself molt with the help of a scalpel right before his eyes was disgusting, as well as seeing how the scars that were healing took on this fleshy waxy look. He was grotesque and he knew that.
This was why he needed Liez. She didn't look at him like he was disgusting. She looked at him like she actually cared about him. Well except today. Other than that though, she had never seemed frightened by his appearance and he wanted her in his life because of it. She didn't see the monster he was on the outside. She saw Donny that was on the inside. Even if the internal Donny was also a monster as well as the external Donny. She understood very well that he had done what he needed to do to those men. She even knew that he had taken sick pleasure in it.
After she finished the scraping for the day she started to clean up everything that she used. He watched her as she worked and kept a small smile on his face. "You are still mad at me." he stated as he watched her glance up at him. She gave him a small shrug and continued what she was doing.
It was hard to watch her like this. "What are you so mad about?" he asked, trying t o play innocent. Liez sighed and then cut her eyes at him. "I am still upset about what you called that woman." she said finally in what he thought was defeat. He leaned backed against his pillows and stared at her. "Look I am not perfect. I said I was sorry, and I promise that I will never call you that. What more do you want?" he asked as he stared at her long and hard.
Then she asked a question that he hoped that she wouldn't have ever asked. "Why does your girl never write you? And more importantly, why does your parents never speak about her in their letters?" she asked. His eyes widened and that was enough for her answer. She stood near the sink in the room and glared at him. He never once got a chance to explain as she started to throw words at him like knives.
"You lied to me! Why would you do something like that? Donny, did you think I wouldn't find out? Or did you think I was simply too stupid to find out that you lied to me!" she yelled loud enough to get her point across, but not loud enough to cause a scene at the hospital. He sat there in his bed, his heart sinking into his stomach, and his mouth open in surprise.
He hadn't really expected her to find out so soon, and better yet, if she did find out he didn't think that she would actually be angered by it. Well, he would be naïve to think she wouldn't be angry, he just didn't think she would find out. And this amount of anger that she was throwing his way was completely new to him and unexpected. He actually had a hard time restraining himself from smiling.
His father once told him true love was even finding the worst in someone, and making it something to love. Here was the worst of Liez, laid right out in the open. She had one hell of a temper, and all he could think about was how he liked the way her cheeks lit up when she stared at him in fury. She was a sight to him, and all he could do was sit there and drink the sight of her in. He didn't know if after today he would see her again so he made sure that he committed her to memory.
The way her tendrils of hair fell beneath her nurse's cap and curled around her cheeks and jaw was absolutely beautiful. The way her full lips were curved into a deep scowl…. "Answer me Donny!" she demanded through perfect clenched teeth. He swallowed hard and then looked away so he could actually try to form an excuse for her. He needed to probably let her down softly, seeing how she had her feelings hurt very badly by what he had done.
"I don't have a girl waiting back for me other than my mother and my sister." he whispered as he scratched the side of his temple. She growled in anger but stood her ground. "I figured that, I am not as stupid as you must think that I look." she hissed at him. "Why would you lie to me Donny?" she asked as she blinked away the tears that were in her eyes.
"I don't owe you the truth! That is why! You are simply my nurse so why don't you start acting like it!" he yelled at her. Instead of just explaining to her how he felt, he just sunk deeper into his own man made hole and further away from her. It was a defense mechanism; it was how he managed to keep people at arm's length to watch them suffer. She fell against the sink slightly as if she had been struck in the face. Despite not really being hit, she did take a blow to her ego. She had really started to like Donny, and worse she had told him about what she did to her brother and he had made her feel like she was still human, when she felt like a monster.
And now here she stood with the man she had thought was going to change her life for the better only to find out that she had crossed some unseen line. It was the line that no nurse should cross with a patient. She hung her head to hide her tears. She bit her lip and tried to ignore one pain by creating another. Once she had regained any ounce of composure that she could possible cling to, she looked up to him with her dark amber eyes turned into stone towards him.
What have I done, he thought desperately. He opened his mouth to speak, but she spoke first. "I am sure you are hungry Mr. Donowitz. I will be back shortly with your noon day meal." she said as she spun on her heel and exited the confines of his room as quickly as she possibly could. She practically ran to the nearest bathroom. Once inside she locked herself within and let it all go.
Hot bitter tears streamed down her face. She had fallen for his lie and it had hurt. Yet it hurt all the more that he lied to her. It didn't even matter that he didn't have a woman waiting for him at home; all that mattered to her was that he had lied. He had broken the trust that she had lent him. She had started to surrender her heart to him, and he had crushed what little she had given him. Therefore, she had no more heart to give him, ever. With this realization she straightened and wiped her tears away.
Xxxxxxxxxx
He stared at the spot where she had been standing. His mind worked a mile a minute and all he could think of was how entirely stupid he was. He had taken advantage of her and played with her emotions. She wasn't some girl, she was the girl, and he had ruined it. He had ruined everything. He crawled out of bed, falling on the ground in the process. He was mad with internal fury, and he was desperate for her to return so he could tell her the truth.
Once he fell he screamed until his throat was raw. It was her name he screamed though. It was her name that fell from his lips over and over again as nurses and doctors rushed into his room. Hands were upon him, helping back into his bed. Hands were upon him as they checked to make sure he was okay, but all he could do was scream her name over and over again, ignoring the rest of them in the process.
His throat was raw, and his voice was becoming broken. He was saying her name wrong like he always did. So anyone who spoke English just heard the word Lies. Even though she would know that it was her name that was spewing forth from his lips. He didn't even feel the physical pain from falling out of bed onto the hard floor, all he could feel was the emotional pain which was worse than any physical pain that he had experienced.
He arched his back and screamed her name again for the last time before she entered the room again. The look on her face was stone cold towards him, the way a nurse's face was supposed to be towards just a patient. He mouthed her name, for his voice would no longer work. She slipped forward and injected him with the needed pain medication to ease his suffering.
The last thing he remembered was staring into those cold, nearly lifeless eyes as he drifted off into a drug induced sleep.