AN: Ah well long time no see. I am still working on this at slower than snails pace obviously lol. Yet I would say we should all be happy that I haven't given up on this! I am hoping in the next two weeks to have another chapter posted as well. I have tons of notes about this fic so I am finally trying to get the ball rolling. Anyways sorry for the long wait, and thanks for baring through it.
She sat on the edge of the bed gripping the sheets in tight fists at her side. She has said yes. She has said yes to Donny's marriage proposal, and now she sat here completely baffled with herself. She has said yes to marrying a man she hardly knew anything about. She had said yes to the bear jew for lord's sake! Her breath hitched in her throat as she suddenly realized the direness of her situation. She may have betrayed her brother and her country, but he beat people to death with a bat. She had dreamed about that bat one time. In the dream she had touched that bat while he was sleeping. She imagined that she had felt the deep groves in the hard wood. Tears sprung to her eyes. It wasn't like the Nazi bastards didn't deserve it. Yet he brutally beat people. It was as if none of this had occurred to her before as she was becoming his friend.
She felt the same outside of her dream as she did inside her dream. Donny beat people to death, and there was a little part of her that really was scared of him because of it. The Nazi's did deserve it, but she also knew that there was no way that Donny didn't carry around scars because of it. And is scared her because he didn't talk about it, and he also held an air of dangerousness about him. She bit her lip and stared intently at her feet as if they would have the answer she wanted.
She let go of the sheets and with both hands, touched her lips with her finger tips. He had kissed her, and her entire body screamed for her to allow him to love her when their lips had touched. She knew for a moment she should be disgusted with herself, but she wasn't. For a man who was so hard around the edges, his lips her soft, and tasted like the world to her, and the only thing that bothered her was that the kiss had not lasted longer. As tears stream down her face, she knew nothing of this man really, and she had committed herself to him with one simple word. Yes! She was terrified of what she had just done, yet exhilarated at the same time.
If she hadn't already made the promise to come back, she would have stayed away from him for good, even though she did say yes. Guilt struck her head as she thought that, but it was true. It was easier to run away than face the reality of what she had done. Yet, she always kept her promises, so she would indeed see him in the morning. It frightened her beyond belief though. Yet the adventure of what their life could hold together in the future made her want to stick around other than the reason she had given her word. Her stomach did this strange little flip and she felt herself blush.
She knew they were more than friends, but in this moment, she actually felt it. She felt it to her core. They were destined from the moment she had met him to be more than friends. Then her mind started to wonder from her little instant of happiness to other things.
Would he revoke his proposal tomorrow? Would he give into rationality and realize he was being rash with her? Would he realize that she was crazy to say yes to his shotgun proposal? A slight part of her hoped her would realize he was all wrong for asker her, but a big part of her said that this was right, and that he needed her and she needed him. It wasn't like she was naïve; she knew she had no one in the country. Her only connection had been killed because of her.
Donny was the only person that she had. He was her everything at the moment, that that was why she had been asked to leave to the hospital because she had clearly developed a deeper relationship with him, one that was undoubtedly unprofessional. What had the hospital expected though? That she just care for him and not develops an unhealthy relationship with him? Not to develop deep feelings for him? Not to want him to love her and love him in return?
She was with him 13 to 14 hours a day, caring for his every single need on his road to recovery. Scraping away his dead flesh, watching him turn into a new man as he healed. She had seen Donny through some of the toughest moments of his life. She had seen him at his worst, and she had seen him at his best since the accident. He had no one else in this country to become connected to, and the same went for her. So clearly this was all the hospital's fault. At the same time she wasn't sure if this was regret she was feeling. Had she been forced into a situation where she was feeling vulnerable for the loss of her brother, and she had clung to Donny because he needed her so entirely? Had that been the reason she said yes?
She choked on a sob and fell back into her bed with that thought. It was painful to think that she had only began to have such strong feelings for him solely on the fact that she was lonely in the wake of losing her brother. This couldn't be the truth though could it? She closed her eyes and thought about her life without Donny. Would she be able to carry on without Donny?
No, she couldn't. Call her crazy, but when she thought of returning to Germany, all she felt was absolute dread. If she imagined returning to Germany with Donny, all she felt was happiness, for at least she would not be alone. She never wanted to return to Germany though. She wanted to follow Donny through this world where ever he may lead her. So saying yes was obviously the wise choice. Her stomach did that flip thing again and she realized that this may very well be what the first signs of love were.
On that thought though, she fell into a rather peaceful sleep.
Xxxxxxxxxx
"I was almost sure you wouldn't come back for me." Donny stated hesitantly as Liez walked into the room. She wore a serene smile, and her face told him he had nothing to worry about. Even though it did worry him to see the look of exhaustion on her face. She had also been crying again. Yet, he was so joyous to see her that he didn't ask her about it. He had lain awake all through the night worrying about if she would really come back to his side. He was so thankful that she had, because now she was at his side, her small hand seeking out his bigger one.
Their warm fingers laced together, and he smiled up at her. They didn't speak for his nurse was in his room. They just sat there together in silence and let the nurse work, it was as if they were the only two in the world at that moment. The nurse meant nothing to them. It wasn't long until sleep finally claimed him. He had to see if she would return, and now that she had he let his guard slip and he allowed himself to sleep.
It was hours later until he woke again, and she sat still by his side, with her hand in his hand, drawing little circles on the back of his hand with her other free hand. He griped her small hand a little tighter and gave her a small smile. He glanced around and found that they were alone.
"How was your nap?" she asked as she helped him sit up. She wasn't his nurse anymore, but she could tell he was uncomfortable, and needed a drink of water. She helped him with both before he answered that his nap was good. He wanted to tell her it was even better that he could smell her sweet lavender scent the entire time that he had napped. He wasn't sure if he could tell her that without getting embarrassed with himself.
"I was worried all night, that you wouldn't come back." he said as she looked down as her hand slipped back into his.
"And I was worried all night that I made the wrong decision." she whispered to him. His jaw clenched hard when she said that, and he became sure that she was just standing beside him holding his hand to just let him down easily. He couldn't look at her he realized. He didn't want to be rejected while looking into her glowing amber eyes. He couldn't take that he realized. He gulped loudly and waited for her to shatter his hopes.
"Then I realized there was no one else that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. You are my best friend Donny. I know I don't know much about you. But I will have plenty of time to learn." she explained right before she kissed his brow.
Such emotion flooded him that he was sure he was going to cry. He didn't though, but if he had he wouldn't have felt wrong because of it. This woman had just made him the happiest man lying in the hospital bed. His heart beat so fast that he could feel it in his throat, and hear it in his ears. Yet he still could not open his mouth and tell her how he really felt. He had proposed to her in the most unromantic way possible, so when he told her he loved her, and wanted to sweep her off her feet, and kiss her like she had never been kissed before, he wanted it to be nothing short of perfect for her.
She may not get a big beautiful wedding, but he wanted to make sure that she knew how he really felt about her when he could really make it special for her. He looked up at her and realized that she was staring at him confused. His face must have looked angry, for he was angry with himself. He wished that he had not lost a leg, and he could have really gotten down on one knee when he proposed. If he hadn't lost that leg though, he wondered if any of this would have happened.
Donny became so happy that he had lost his leg, because it ended up blessing his life. Liez was now his everything and he had to thank losing a leg for that. He guessed if they ever got into anymore fights that he could tell her that he already gave a leg for her. He chuckled to himself and reached out and tucked some of his favorite glossy brown hair of hers behind her ear.
She stared at him confused with a shy smile on her face. He also saw the nervousness in her eyes. She was afraid, he could tell. He wanted to comfort her, but he couldn't if she wouldn't tell him what she was feeling. He didn't have it in him to ask her either. He supposed that she needed time to tell him. He had a good sense though that she was afraid for marrying him. He was afraid of marrying her too.
What would their life be like? Would it be full of nothing but a business like marriage, where she married him to take care of him? That thought didn't sit well with him. He realized suddenly he was the one who had asked her that way. He had said that he needed her in his life because she was a nurse. He started to choke he realized and she started patting him on the back to ease his choking. After his coughing died down he began to speak incoherently to her.
"Donny, slow down, I don't know what you are saying." she said, still having a few problems with the English language when the person was speaking too quickly which he was.
"I don't want you to marry me to take care of me… I said that yesterday that you were a nurse that that is part of the reason we should get married, and I didn't mean that. I want you there to take care of me, but so I can take care of you too. I don't want you to marry me solely because you are my nurse." he explained slowly for he was out of breath.
She smiled and brushed some of his coal black hair out of his eyes. His hair had grown longer, and she needed to give him a cut. She let her mind wander about his hair for a moment as she thought about what he said to her. Then instead of answering she just leaned forward and kissed him on his lips.
He didn't know how much he needed her to comfort him physically until then. He breathed her in and let his lips melt gently against hers. She broke the kiss and laughed at him. "Did you think that I was marrying you because I wanted to be your nurse the rest of my life?" she asked as she continued to play with his hair. He closed his eyes and relished the feeling of her fingers whispering though his hair.
"I sure hope not, I am a horrible patient." he laughed as he opened his eyes to look at her. She was really stunning. He had lucked out. "It wouldn't hurt for you to wear the nurse outfit every now and again just for old time's sake though." he said with a smile.
"And maybe I will get out the scalpel for old time's sake as well." she said with a smile as well as a little wink.