He can imprint on anyone, anytime. No, Jake can never find out the reason I hold myself back from falling completely in love with him. He would hate and resent himself for becoming a werewolf. I could never allow that to happen.

You could warm me like the sun;

You could cure me with a kiss!

One embrace would melt all this

Black Siberia within!

"Song for an Afternoon", Charles Baudelaire, translated from French by Walter Martin.

It was late into the night, and some of us were still seated around a dying bonfire. The rest were passed out, sleeping on the blankets. Sam and Emily were gone, and I wasn't even sure when they left. I was still sitting between Jacob's legs completely surrounded by him. He was slouched lower, his head resting on my bare shoulder, his cheek pressed against the side of my neck. He turned his face towards me, "I think I should get you in bed," he murmured, his breath tickling my ear.

I decided to ignore the double meaning of his words. " Don't be silly Jake. You are not running me back home." My voice was slightly slurred but firm. I was too drunk to take a chance of Charlie waking up when I got home. We could just crash on a blanket like everyone else.

His warm hands squeezed me tighter and he pressed his lips to my exposed shoulder. I felt the tip of his tongue come out and taste my skin. " I meant my bed, " his voice a few octaves lower than usual. The feel of his soft lips against my skin sent sparks shooting up and down my entire body before they settled between my hips. I shivered and the spot where his lips grazed my skin turned to goose bumps. We both knew it wasn't from the cold. His words were innocent enough, but the way he delivered them suggested a different, less innocent meaning. They were too full if innuendos. "Jake," I bit my lip. My head fell back against his chest and my eyes fluttered shut of their own accord. My hand squeezed his knee without my permission. Encouraged by my body's response, his lips skimmed the length of my shoulder and up my neck before stopping and planting a feather light kiss behind my ear. I let out a barely audible moan. Oh God, what the hell was I doing? I heard his sharp intake of breath in my ear a second before it turned fast and shallow. I could feel him gauging my reaction, contemplating his next move. I knew he was afraid of pushing it too far; of overstepping the boundaries. Somewhere in the back of my head a tiny voice screamed that it's too late. He's so far past the boundary line it's not even visible anymore. That tiny voice was right. He was flirting with me again and he was good. Dangerously good. This, whatever this was we were doing, needed to stop before we took it too far.

I opened my eyes. "Sorry about that Jake. I don't know why I just reacted like that."I blushed and began to untangle myself from him. His grip on me loosened , but not enough for me to get myself free. "Oh that's right, maybe it was because you kissed my shoulder," I hissed quietly. "And then behind my ear." He smiled, completely unremorseful. I spoke quietly not wanting anyone to hear. " If someone was to observe us from a distance, they would think we were lovers not best friends." I shook my head. " C'mon let's go to sleep, I think we both had too much to drink." His face was unreadable. He nodded, stood up, and then picked me up bridal style. I raised my eyebrow in question.

" Oh, c'mon Bells. You don't expect me to let you sleep on the ground do you? If I recall you like sleeping in my bed." He smirked and I blushed. "I, of course, "he continued while walking, "will sleep on Billy's new couch. Being a gentleman, I would never entertain a different thought." I rolled my eyes and began swinging my dangling feet back and forth as he carried me. I felt like a small child or a princess and the thought made me giggle.

"What's so funny?" His lips twitched into a smile.

" I feel like a little child or a princess." I shrugged hoping he would drop it.

He kissed the top of my head. " To me, you are a princess."

He carried me down the beach in silence for a few minutes, the sound of crashing waves and our breathing the only noise around us. I speculated that both our minds were occupied with the same thoughts. Mine was back at the bonfire, replaying the way his lips ghosted over my shoulder and up the length of my neck. Replaying the way his voice sounded , deep and husky, when he whispered in my ear, the way his wet tongue felt on my skin. I blushed right on cue and then started fidgeting with my blouse in order to avoid looking at Jake. I could feel his gaze on my face, but he didn't say anything. Suddenly a thought occurred to me.

"Where did you go? Earlier, I mean, when you announced you were going for a walk and Embry followed you?" I was still fidgeting with the bottom of my blouse not looking at him.

"Seattle"

"What!? You and Embry ran all the way to Seattle and back in an hour?!" I had no idea werewolves were so fast.

" We also had some burgers there." He smirked. He knew I was impressed. I'm sure I was doing the perfect imitation of a goldfish- mouth hanging open, eyes bulged.

It was silent for a few seconds before he let out a shaky breath and looked straight into my eyes. " Honestly I needed to cool off for a while. When I saw Tom caress your collarbone I lost it. I was sure I would phase right in front of everyone."

I was quiet for a long time before I put my face in my hands and started, "Jake you.."

He cut me off. " I know Bella. I know. Trust me. I know we are just best friends. I had no reason to react the way I did tonight. I'm sorry I wasn't able to control myself better."

I kept my head in my hands and nodded. I didn't know what to say. I didn't know if I was supposed to apologize for leading him on , or for always hurting him, or maybe for being such a stupid friend. I decided it was better to remain quiet. We would talk more about this tomorrow, when we were both sober.

"Here we are." I looked at him confused and he motioned his head towards the house. I didn't even notice it until now, it was too dark.

He carried me in and didn't put me down until we were in his bedroom. I sat down on the bed, suddenly really exhausted. He crouched down in front of me in one fluid movement took of my sandals, then gently rubbed each foot before standing up and walking to his dresser. I looked up in time for a fresh t shirt to hit me in the face and then fall into my suddenly outstretched hands.

" Thanks"

He smiled ." Sure, sure. I'll be in the kitchen if you need anything."

Briskly, I removed my clothes, and then slipped on his t shirt. The well worn cotton felt soft against my skin. I dragged the collar up to my nose and inhaled, smiling. It was way to big; it almost fell to my knees.

I could hear him meddling around the kitchen so I decided to go and say goodnight. I tiptoed down the hallway and into the kitchen as quietly as I could in order not to wake Billy. Jake's back was to me, and he was digging in the fridge. I wasn't sure if he heard me come in.

" Would you like a snack?" He asked without turning.

" No thanks. I just wanted to say goodnight."

He straightened up. " Goodnight honey." He turned around and so quickly that it was barely perceptible his eyes raked up and down my body and his face flooded with color.

" Umm, I'll see you in the morning." He waved his hand awkwardly and started walking towards the living room, his feet stumbling on floor he has walked on his entire life.

I didn't know what to do, so I just turned around and walked back into his room shutting the door behind me. Why did he react that way? It was just a t shirt for god's sake! It could even be a dress, that's how long it was on me for Christ's sake. I noticed a full length mirror on the back of his door and turned on the light to see what was wrong with the way I looked. I flashed the light on and had to smack a hand over my mouth to keep from screaming. His cotton t shirt was very thin from wear. My black strapless push up bra and lace boy shorts were clearly visible through the thin cotton. Mortified, I climbed into bed and prayed for sleep to take me.

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