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Chapter 61

"How could she show up like that?"

I shook my head. Christine, Meg, Antoinette, and I were having a girl's night of sorts. Antoinette had sensed that something was wrong with me after that night in the kitchen and her theory was proven correct when I fell on stage. So, as a way to help me relax and regroup, she gathered the ingredients for hot chocolate, some sweets, and made a fire in her fireplace to help calm me. The other girls coming and talking with me was a plus. I needed a girl's viewpoint on some things.

"I have no idea. But it has got me to thinking: what would happen if I suddenly went back? I know that I would have my old life back, but I don't want to leave this one behind. I've made a great life here."

I could see tears gather in Meg's eyes. "I don't want you to go!"

I wrapped my arm around her shoulders. "And I don't want to go, but it's something I have to think about. It's how I ended up here in the first place, just randomly dropping on your doorstep. The logical thing to do would be to think and plan as if it will happen again."

"While that may be," Antoinette began, adjusting herself on her couch. "I do not think we have to dwell so much on such unpleasantries tonight. There will be plenty of time for that after tomorrow. So until then, how about we think on better things. Christine, how is the wedding planning coming along?"

Christine's teary face lit up. "Oh, it is going wonderfully! Our colors are set…"

Christine's voice slowly faded in my ears as my thoughts went on the rampage. Thoughts are so exhausting. Christine seemed to notice I was fading out. "Mandy? Are you okay?"

I looked over to her and nodded. "I'm fine. Sorry, my thoughts are going a million miles a minute."

Christine smiled understandingly. "That can happen, especially with all you have been through lately. How about your wedding? Have you set on a date yet?"

"We have not. Honestly, I haven't even been thinking about our wedding with everything going on. But Erik doesn't seem to mind. He's still busy as ever with his music and keeping up with me."

They all nodded then went back to discussing Christine and Raoul's upcoming nuptials. But that brought up yet another torrent of thoughts. What would Erik do if I went back suddenly, especially if we were married? Would he consider himself a widower? Would he be able to move on? The sudden thought made me queasy. It must have shown on my face as Antoinette clapped once and said, "I think we all need some rest. Let us sleep and resume our talks in the morning."

I was more than happy to oblige. Maybe sleep would give me a reprieve.

I couldn't have been more wrong…

"Again, hey sis. What was up with bailing on me like that before?"

My eyes shot open to see Rose right in my face. She smiled that goofy smile of hers that I missed so much. "Wakey, wakey, sleepy head."

I shot straight up out of bed…wait, bed? I was on the floor with Meg and Christine. That's when my surroundings caught up to me: the Phantom posters, the floral pink walls, and the textbooks on the corner desk.

We were in Rose's room.

Once I gathered my bearings, I looked at her as she was sitting on the side of the bed. "How…how is this possible?"

She rolled her eyes. "Really? You're gonna ask how this is possible when you just randomly showed up in 1800s Paris?"

She did have a point. I shook my head. "I came to terms with not understanding that a long time ago. But you…you can't be here."

Rose stood from the bed and walked to her desk, flipping open a random book cover. "But I am. I need to talk to you."

I said nothing as my gaze stayed steady on her, on the book she was playing around with. I couldn't catch the title.

Once she saw that I wasn't going to say anything, she continued. "As you have probably gathered, I am the one responsible for sending you to Paris."

"I had my suspicions. It would definitely be a you thing to do."

She chuckled. "Am I that predictable? Anyways, yes it was me. But it was for a good reason."

"And what reason would that be?"

Rose paused before tentatively saying, "I can't say just yet. You need to figure out a bit more before I reveal that."

I scoffed at her reply. "Like I haven't been shorting out trying to do that already!"

I saw her wince slightly, then she spoke again. "I know it's frustrating, but you have to trust me. You know I wouldn't do this without a reason."

"Oh, really? Trust you? Trust the word of a dead girl that turned my life upside down with no warning?" Anger welled up in me suddenly. Whether it was at her or at the frustration of the weeks before, I didn't know. Maybe it was both.

Again she winced, this time more visibly. "I deserve that. I know you're confused and mad and all of the above, and you have no reason to trust me. But please just hear me out-"

"I don't have to hear anything from you, Rose! You left me!" I was sobbing at this point. "You left me and I didn't get a chance to help you or to say goodbye! So tell me why I should listen to you if you didn't listen to me! I t-told you not to go…I told you not to go…"

Rose's arms wrapped around my shoulders, comforting me as I wept. I could feel her tears falling in my hair. "I know, Mandy. I should have listened. But we can't change what happened. Mandy, look at me." She leaned back from me and held my face, waiting to speak until I opened my eyes to look at her. "You can't keep blaming yourself for something I did out of stupidity. It was not your fault, do you hear me?"

Rose embraced me again. She was always the mother hen, always making sure everyone and everything was okay.

It took a few minutes for me to calm down. Yes, there were tears of sadness and guilt, but also a sense of release. Hearing Rose say that I was not at fault somehow made me feel better, freed a portion of my soul. The dam of emotion just broke, allowing the feelings I had to release and gave me the ability to breathe again.

As the tears ceased, I pulled back from Rose's embrace. "I miss you so much, girl."

"I miss you, too, sis. Now tell me…what's it like being with Erik?"

I had no choice but to laugh at the absurdity of it all. I was talking to my dead best friend about my fictional fiancé. But as I started to tell her how wonderful Erik was, the bedroom door opened, revealing Jackson in his sleep clothes. He rubbed his eyes vigorously as if he couldn't believe what he saw. I couldn't quite believe it either. But before he had a chance to open his eyes again, I was suddenly awake back in the middle of Antoinette's floor.