CHAPTER 4

"I shall ask but once now and the guilty one had better stand up and admit it, because I will find out the truth anyway, eventually. You know I always do," the Older One spoke, calmly but with a clear hint of menace, his dark gaze scrutinizing the figures more or less slumped over the morning table. "Who broke the door?"

Maka had known this was coming. She stared determinedly into her bowl of stew, hand clenched on the spoon and lips pressed tightly. The Brother sat across from her, blatantly toying with his piece of bread. He was undoubtedly trying to be intimidating, but as long as he remained silent everything would be fine, the meister thought. How could the Older One discover the culprit if no one talked? She was innocent anyway and even if he did… Kid was a Death God, after all. What could they possibly do to him, just for breaking some shitty door?

"No one speaks, I see…" the Older One concluded after a while, breaking the tensioned silence floating around the table. "You have been warned, may Death have mercy on you when I find out who did this..."

The blonde left the table as soon as she could and hurried to the kitchen to collect the bread loafs left for the old beggar. Maka hoped that this time the woman would be silent, the last thing she needed was for the beggar to make another fuss because of her. She grabbed the leftovers and stuffed them in her pocket, her heart already beginning to pound with the adrenaline of the upcoming task. It was crucial that she got into the Temple before the other Brothers and Sisters. Good thing that at least the pain in her leg had mostly subsided during her sleep.

More snow had fallen during the night, covering the outer terrace with a soft carpet, a single trail of steps dotting the white surface, along with the black frame of the woman, who had already occupied her usual place below the railing. It furtively crossed the meister's mind that she had not seen her anywhere the previous night, which meant she must have had a shelter somewhere. It was a comforting thought, because the clear air was absolutely freezing, Maka's breath coming out in small clouds of steam as she stepped outside. The shinigami cloak was securely stuffed under her dress and around her body, keeping her warm to some extent and right then she wished she did not have to return it to its rightful owner.

Rubbing her hands to keep them from freezing, the blonde quickly stooped and placed the bread into the woman's lap, relieved to observe that her gaze wandered somewhere past the meister's shoulder, into the grayish blur that was the winter sky. Her bony features seemed carved in stone, as she sat without moving, without as much as blinking. Thankfully, this seemed to be one of her quiet days.

"It is love," the beggar said simply, just as Maka had stood up and was preparing to walk away. The meister knew that she should have ignored her – she wasn't supposed to talk to this woman, just as she wasn't supposed to talk to anyone – and it would be a bad idea if she did. It had been the last time and the last thing she needed was to draw even more attention onto herself.

"What is?" she asked nevertheless, despite herself, halting her movement. The wind blew over the two of them, icy and biting, sweeping away the snow in its path, like a harsh breath of despair. Love? The word sounded so foreign, so abstract in this accursed realm.

"The reason why I'm here, why I will be here until the day they burn these old bones," the woman spoke, her voice soft and clear. "I have no choice but to wait for him…" she added, shifting her gaze towards the massive Temple doors. Maka felt a pang of pain in her chest at the words, this was much too cruel. Could it be that the beggar did not really know the truth about the Temple? Wasn't she aware that those walking past those doors would never get out? Or was it that madness had made her deny the horrible truth, blessing her with this futile sort of hope? The blonde didn't know what to say to this, or whether it was her place to say anything at all.

"I know what you think," the old woman interrupted her thoughts. "You think my husband is dead and I'm waiting here for nothing, don't you? But you are too kind to say it out loud…"

Maka threw a glance towards the habitations area, the Brothers and Sisters would come out soon and she really ought to waste no more time. But it was strange and intriguing to discover that maybe the only human being around who was willing to talk to her wasn't that insane after all.

"You should not worry about me, young girl. The one who has given me the kiss of life cannot die, even you should know as much. Death Gods don't die"

The meister shook her head, then turned and padded hurriedly towards the large doors, as fast as her still aching ankle would allow it. I guess she is crazy after all… How could she claim to be married to a Death God? That's completely wacked! Maka decided not to dwell on the subject any longer, she had things to do before it would start going really bad.

She squinted in the darkness of the cave, waiting for her eyes to adjust to the semi-obscurity before retracing their steps from the previous night. Here was the alcove where they'd hidden from the Brother and then… where could the ring have rolled off to? Maka made an effort to remember what she had seen, except she hadn't seen very much at the time, barely their pursuer's figure moving away from them. The meister carefully retraced what she thought had been his path, there weren't that many options anyway – the ring, if he hadn't found it already, must have ended up into one of the alcoves in the back of the hall.

"Damn it!" the blonde grumbled, she was supposed to save the candle enough to last her for the whole day, which pretty much meant groping in the dark most of the time anyway and there she was, forced to waste it on this stupid search. Kneeling onto the hard stone floor, Maka directed the flame onto the blackened slabs, searching for the jewel. Stupid Kid! Couldn't he just throw a button or something else?! But no, it had to be the ring, because nothing else would have made that noise she'd heard.

"Damn it, damn it, damn it! Oh, by Death, it's nowhere!" the blonde whimpered silently, crawling to the last alcove, still empty handed. Let's calm down now, let's calm down! Even if the Brother has found the ring, so what? He can't put two and two together, can he? Or maybe he can, but there simply isn't enough proof… of anything. And he cannot tell the Older One anything without proof, can he? Maka tried to convince herself, despite the cold sweat already covering her brow. The candle bud she'd received after breakfast had almost burned out – she'd be as good as blind for the rest of the day – but she still searched the cramped space and suddenly there it was, a pale gleam of silver under the bed, right on the edge of the crevice leading all the way down to the burning pit. It was sheer luck it had stopped there.

Maka had a sudden sense of victory as she crammed herself into the narrow space and her fingers closed around the small treasure. Phew! She had worried for nothing, how could the Brother have found it with no light at all? And massive as he was, he probably couldn't reach under the bed anyway, she told herself, stretching her aching back and running her thumb over the tiny skull ornament. But sad thoughts overwhelmed her upon looking at the familiar emblem, thoughts of her friends, of her school, of her home. Will we ever get back there? Will I ever get to see Papa again? And my friends?

The sound of several pairs of footsteps alerted Maka of the arrival of the first pilgrims for the day - pulling her from her musings – and she stood up quickly, sniffing. Only then she realised she'd been crying, her cheeks were soaked with already cooling tears which she hurried to wipe with the back of her rough sleeve. But what to do with the ring? The pockets of her dress were too large, it wasn't safe to put it there - she could lose it only too easy – and she only had her pockets for a hideout. The blonde glanced down at her own hands, pale and worked, with dirty nails she'd occasionally chewed on. No one would look at them, I guess… Without further debate, she slipped Kid's ring onto her middle finger, just as he wore it. It was a perfect fit.

It had turned out to be a horribly long day, followed by a few more, equally long and horrible days, with no sign from the young shinigami. Maka'd had to be careful to hide her left hand every time someone passed her by (she had been forced to take the ring out when sitting at the common table though, where it could have been spotted with ease by any of the Brothers and Sisters) and the damned ring was pulling at her hand in an oddly fashion, for she wasn't much used to wearing jewels and she'd never wore a ring before. The constant need to tweak her fingers was extremely annoying.

On top of everything, her thoughts constantly wandered back to the bits of information Kid had revealed during their encounter – who and what were The Three? And did they have anything to do with the Kishin who had sent them here? And if they really were so dangerous… The Older One had not mentioned the door incident again, nor had he asked any more questions, which was quite odd. Nobody had been punished either – the blonde would have known, since usually the guilty one was made an example of – which could only mean that he hadn't discovered the truth. No, maybe the Older One has not discovered the culprit, but what if The Three found out? Kid had reluctantly mentioned that 'objecting' to being held here had proven a bad idea, did that mean they had punished him then? What if they punished him again this time? Maybe that's why he's not coming…

This fruitless wait was exasperating. Of course, Maka saw Death Gods everyday at the Temple, actually more like catching a glimpse of them as they came and quickly looking away, because beholding them directly was forbidden, but even if she had looked more carefully it would have still been of no use – shrouded in their black cloaks and with their white bone masks on they all looked exactly the same. There was no telling which one of them was Kid, or if he was among them in the first place.

But he had been outside that night, Maka didn't know why, clearly there was no way he could have known that she would come out too, their meeting had been a coincidence. Thus, the blonde thought that if she wanted to find him, most likely she would have to go to the Temple at night again. Now that was quite a daunting and risky prospect, she could very well meet the Brother instead, or even worse, the Older One. But she had no choice, she had to try.

Soundlessly cracking open the door of her room, Maka tried to use soul perception to see if there was anyone around. Yet with so many souls crammed together in the relatively small space which was the habitations area it was difficult, while the mad pounding of her own heart made it hard for her to focus. It seemed new habits died just as hard as the old ones, after all. But there was no one lurking in the darkness of the narrow corridor and she eventually crept out of her room, sliding along the wall almost holding her breath.

The main door had still not been repaired – there was a rather large piece of it missing where the lock had been – and now it hardly closed at all, shaking in the rusty hinges at each stronger gale of wind. At least the meister couldn't find herself locked on the outside again, later. Maka slipped out, pulling her dress around her body tighter and instantly cursing the vicious weather. The cold made her ankle hurt again, but she ignored the pain, hurrying towards the Temple doors. These were never locked, so she just made her way inside, as quietly as possible. She stopped dead in her tracks at the sight before her, the blonde's breath hitching in her throat.

Kid was there, but he didn't seem to notice her presence at all. He had kneeled in front of the Black Water basin with a cup in his hand and proceeded to fill it to the brim. The other meister watched in a terrified sort of fascination as the young shinigami brought it to his lips and downed the contents in one long gulp. Almost instantly he collapsed backwards, the cup rolling down from his hand and onto the tiles with a startling clatter which brought Maka to her senses.

No! she mouthed silently, running and kneeling next to his fallen body. The reaper did not seem to be breathing and in the dim light the blonde was under the impression that the white lines in his hair had somewhat faded. "No! Kid, no! Please, no!" Maka whimpered, her eyes instantly filling with tears, as she clutched desperately at the front of his cloak, trying to shake him awake. Suddenly, a wave of fury washed over her and she backhanded him across the face with all her strength. "You bastard! You want to leave me here, all alone!" the blonde yelled.

A groan escaped the young shinigami's lips and, agonizingly slow, his eyes fluttered open. With a bit of struggle, Kid managed to prop himself up on his elbows, blinking sleepily, obviously surprised to see her there, hovering above him.

"What the hell do you think you're doing, YOU IDIOT?!" Maka shouted, but the reaper caught her wrist before she could hit him again. "And you've tried this before, haven't you? The first time I saw you…" she asked, doing her best to wipe her tears with her free hand. "Tried to kill yourself, just like everyone else! And what am I supposed to do, huh? What the hell am I supposed to do?" The meister's tone had faded again to a strained whimper and she gulped, trying to swallow the knot of tears in her throat.

"Maka, the Black Water is poison for humans, but it won't kill me. It just numbs me, like… a sedative of sorts," Kid explained, his voice drowsy with sleep, pressing his slapped cheek with one hand, while the other still held her wrist captive. The blonde frowned – why the hell did he need that? What sort of explanation was this? She began to feel genuinely frightened now, what had this place done to her classmate? And what else was he hiding?

"But why do you need to… be numbed? Isn't that like a drug or something?"

The shinigami released her arm and buried his face in his hands. "I wish you hadn't seen me like this…" He sounded ashamed, defeated even and only now the blonde noticed that his left hand was bandaged with a rag. "But I have to… to stop feeling anything in order to be able to do the work required of me here. I couldn't otherwise, it's just too much… You have been blessed until now to revert to an ordinary human state, returning your memories has only made things worse for you, much more painful"

"What?"

But it was true – ever since she had regained her memories and abilities as a meister, not once she had tried to see… No, I did not want to know, I did not want to see all the souls of the people dying here every single day… But Maka couldn't actually see the souls, not even if she tried now, she could only feel the poisonous imprint they'd left behind, looming like a growing, ever developing shadow, suddenly overwhelming her perception. It is too much, too much! The pain spread from her chest all over, into every single fiber of her body and Maka couldn't fight back the scream erupting from her throat.

To be continued