Chapter 11

There are some things about myself that I cannot explain. When you are young you do things and then realize you have no intellect of why. Perhaps it is because at times we do things in a hidden state of mind. And when we do these things we subconsciously know why we are doing them, but the only problem is we cannot read our own subconscious. I like to think a big part of my decisions had to do with this theory. I remember the night Erik and I were performing the duet "Past the Point of no return." At the end of the song I tore off his mask. To me this was just a desperate spur of the moment action in an attempt to get the attention off of me. But the more I recollect, the more I think I was subconsciously searching for a way to save his life, to distract the crowd and guards in time for him to take me away, and at least have the chance to escape.

I cared a great deal for Erik, and I truly did want to protect him from the outside world, but there would be times I would put my needs before his.

It was during the show I got the sudden urge to socialize with someone, anyone there on the main floors. It had been so long since I last had a conversation with someone besides Erik. Though it felt like I could never slip past him, he was indeed rather distracted watching the opera. This would definitely test his love and devotion for me once he saw I was sneaking off to talk to people. I glanced up at Erik and it looked like it had to be done now if I was ever going to slip around the curtain and sneak off. I slowly made my way backward until I was able to turn around and swiftly run off toward the stairs. Once I reached the bottom I looked around and it was though I was just an average woman whom people smiled and nodded at as they passed. This was most likely because I did not recognize anyone and vise versa.

"Christine!" I heard a small voice call.

I turned around and it was Meg, running toward me.

"What are you doing here?" she asked.

"I – came to see the show."

I smiled at her and she looked at me with astonishment.

"But what about- "

Then I heard another call my name. I turned around and it was Ismene, a fellow chorus girl that I socialized with often before I became an overnight sensation as a soprano. She had long straight auburn hair just as I remembered, and her long face had large beautiful bright green eyes that stared into mine. She shook her head and looked at me as if she were looking at a ghost.

"You – Christine, you – you are alive!"

I hushed her and took she and Meg into a secluded abandoned corner. I spoke to Ismene in a demanding voice.

"Ismene, you mustn't tell anyone I am alive. Do you understand?"

Her wide eyes twitched and her mouth dropped slightly.

"But Christine you are ALIVE! They searched for you and then presumed you were dead! Oh what a happy day this is! AND RAOUL! Oh Christine just wait until he finds out- "

"NO!" I screamed.

She looked at me in shocked disappointment. Then her face suddenly went expressionless and she looked deeply into my eyes.

"Christine, are you being held captive?"

I sighed and did not answer her question.

"Listen, no one must know that I live. Do not worry Ismene, everything is well. It is just nice to see you again."

Her sympathetic glassy eyes remained on me for a minute, and she reached out and hugged me.

"Oh Christine, it brings happiness to my heart knowing you were not murdered or killed."

Meg suddenly interrupted the reunion.

"She married the phantom, look, she wears a wedding ring."

Just then it hit me. The phantom. My heart started to panic.

"Oh lord, I must leave, I am sorry."

I ran off and went back up the stairs. I peered into box 5 and saw that Erik was no longer anywhere in sight. Without thinking I ran back down the stairs but ran right into a man and fell to the floor. I looked up to see a scruffy looking man whom I immediately recognized. He worked for the opera house, and was the brother of a man Erik had killed by hanging. His wild beady eyes pieced into mine and his voice was loud and intimidating.

"YOU!" he drunkenly hollered.

I scrambled to my feet and started running away from him. I ran down flights of stairs and he was right behind me trying to grab me. I desperately searched for one of Erik's trap doors, hardly being able to breathe, and eventually came across a smaller one. I did not recognize it, but I needed desperately to get away. I opened it and jumped inside and sure enough he followed. It was extremely dark and all I could think about was running faster. It became a tight fit so I crawled some of the way and eventually it sounded like he was quite far behind. Slowing down a little to catch my breath, I began to walk. I had both hands on each side of the brick walls so I could feel where I was going. Then, in the next moment, I felt wall but no floor. I shot downwards and could feel myself falling down an endless abyss of the opera house. My heart leapt out of my chest, I could hardly scream, and could hardly breathe. My lungs were tight and painful. My eyes completely lost their vision and suddenly it felt like this was it. I was going to die; I would hit the ground and cripple myself. What a terrible feeling falling was, and it's even more terrible when you know you have just snapped your last rope.

In a blurred frame of mind, I started kicking my feet and my arms scrambled around me trying to feel for something to grab on to. Though the ground was nonexistent, the walls were still narrow and within my reach. I stretched my arms and legs out as far as they would go and pressed against those walls as hard as I could. The stone rubbed hard into the flesh of my arms and elbows. My knees and legs endured the pain too. Hysterically, with a hoarse voice I screamed out in agony and pain. It was excruciating, and at that point I started to regret not letting myself just fall. Tears streamed down my face and for an instant I prayed for my life. My falling slowed down as I listened to the sound of my skin being scraped and my consciousness began to return to me. Whimpering and aching I looked down and saw that the bottom of this pit was close to being over. There was about five feet between me and the stone floor. So I let go and allowed myself to drop.

I hit the floor hard, and sharp aching pain surged throughout my entire body like lightening. My cheeks were drenched in cold tears and I propped myself against a wall. Then I noticed on the wall there was a door. I opened the small door and crawled out and the darkness turned into a candlelit room. I was back in Erik's lair. I tried to breathe steadily, and then heard footsteps. It was Erik, obviously not aware of what I had just happened to me. I could see he was extremely angry with me and his actions showed pure rage.

"How dare you sneak off again!" he shouted as he jerked me up to my feet forcefully by my wrist. He shouted out of pure insanity and his voice pierced me from the inside.

"YOU WILL NOT RUN FROM ME! I AM YOUR HUSBAND AND YOU ARE MY WIFE! YOU WILL NOT LEAVE ME!"

I balled and whimpered like a child and begged him to release me. He did and turned away breathing heavily. I collapsed on the floor and suddenly I felt dizzy and nauseas. My entire body was shaking. I laid my head down and glanced up to see Erik studying the hand he grabbed my wrist with. It was covered in blood.

I closed my eyes and could hear him rushing to me. He desperately called out my name. I opened my eyes and he fell to his knees before me sick with emotion. His forehead wrinkled in grief and held me like a delicate china doll.

"Oh god in heaven Christine, forgive me!" He sobbed, lifting me slightly and cradling me.

He studied me for a moment, looking at my wounds and then into my eyes. His voice was soft now, and he sounded like himself again.

"What has happened to you?" He held me tighter trying to get composer.

I couldn't speak properly, all I could do was look at him and cry while saying one thing.

"Erik, I am sorry!"

He looked at me with pure astonishment.

"Don't you dare say that Christine…I beg of you!"

Tears rolled down his eyes. He held my hand, studied it, and looked down at me. He spoke to me quietly.

"You're shaking."

When I looked into his eyes, they seemed to calm me down, despite his temper tantrum just moments ago.

Erik lifted me up and carried me to his room. He began cleaning and dressing my wounds. Burning pain devoured my arms and legs. I squirmed in this pain and could feel myself getting light headed. Erik, seeing the pain I was in, asked me if I could drink anything. He brought me some water, and gave me a little wine to help the pain. Erik kept asking me what happened but all I could say is that I fell. He studied me intricately and said that he did not understand. I then told Erik I wanted to try and walk around.

As I walked around the lake, limping, I heard the sound of a door opening. Erik was still in his room, getting more sheets for me. Suddenly I heard the sound of water being splashed around.

I looked around the corner and my heart pounded. There he was, the man who was chasing me. He stomped out of the water and I opened my mouth to yell but I was in too much shock. He looked at me and gritted his teeth. He came after me and reached out to grab me forcefully. I cried out and covered my face. Before he could even touch me however, Erik came from right behind me and grabbed him. He then lifted him in the air and slammed him against the wall. The man cursed and hollered and kicked but Erik held him there, his face beating red from anger. Erik reached for rope that was hooked on the wall and told me to go to his room.

"Erik-"

"Just go Christine, don't worry."

"Erik please!"

Erik did not turn to me but kept his eyes on the wild drunken man.

"You dare lay one finger on my wife-"

The man continued cursing as Erik wrapped rope around his neck.

"This will cost you your life monsieur!" Erik barked.

I cried out to Erik hoping I could stop him from killing yet another man.

"Erik! You PROMISED me!"

He stopped. His eye contact with the man finally broke. Erik looked over at me. Then in an instant while Erik wasn't paying attention the man reached into his pocket and pulled out a knife. Erik cried out when the man gashed his side with the knife. Erik let go of him and fell to the ground. The man dropped the knife and took off running into the lake.

I ran to Erik and stayed by his side until the man was completely gone out of our site. I helped Erik get up and supported him while I took him to his bedroom. After I wrapped Erik's wound in a soft clean cloth to stop the bleeding, I started to examine the knife too see if it was dirty at all. It appeared clean besides Erik's' blood on it. This was a good sign, and it meant no chance of an infection.

I walked over and sat beside Erik as he lay in his bed. I ran my fingers along the thin cloth that covered his side and he twitched in pain. He looked up at me and asked me if the man had gotten away. I nodded.

Erik sighed out in frustration.

"I shouldn't have let him get away," he grumbled.

"But you stopped yourself," I said.

He looked up at me and though he was frowning, his eyes glistened.

"I promised you."

I smiled and felt a tear roll down my cheek. Erik wiped it away and I leaned down to kiss his cheek.

"I am so proud of you, Erik," I muttered.

With that he held me close to him and I rested my head on his shoulder. Guilt took over me now, because Erik was hurt because of me. If I wouldn't have gone off to satisfy my social needs he would not be wounded. But besides that, the man got away. He was drunk and disoriented, yes, but who would know to what extent of consequences my mistake would cause. But more importantly, what other mistakes would I make after this one, which would cost me dearly?