Super Luigi Sunshine! Part 16: Rainbow River?
Shine 2/13: Gonzalo's Surfing Challenge!
A/N: I searched 'hardest Mario obstacle course' on Google and the first thing to appear was a blog about Super Mario Sunshine's FLUDD-less levels. The reason I did this search was to try finding a fitting chapter title, I ended up just calling it 'Rainbow River?' but thought it was quite funny that the first result was about the game I'm typing about.
^Day 5, around three O'clock in the morning - Delfino Plaza^
Mario left his house near the lighthouse and slowly walked through the town heading towards the portal to Ricco Harbour, on his way he saw that all the stores were shut and nobody else was up yet.
"You're up early," Emile states.
"I realised that if I can get all the Shine Sprites before thirty days I may be able to salvage at least some of my holidays," Mario says walking past the Grand Pianta Statue, he noticed that the portal was gone. Mario was walking towards the boathouse when he heard a Pianta mumbling something, he turned to his left and saw a Pianta standing in front of the seemingly useless tower.
"Unforgivable! I have HAD it!" A Pianta yells at a wanter poster of Mario. Mario walked to him and stood behind him, he hadn't seen the Mario wanted poster yet. "Someone ruined my wall!" The Pianta yells slamming a large fist on the wall in front of him.
"Hi there, what happened to your wall?" Mario asked and the Pianta growled.
"What does 'M' mean, anyway?" The Pianta yelled and turned around to look at Mario, as he did Mario saw the wanted poster. "And
have we met before?" Mario quickly ran away and jumped through the portal to Ricco Harbour before the Pianta could realise who he was.
^Ricco Harbour^
Mario landed down at Ricco Harbour and noticed that the water was not covered in Oil (and blood) anymore.
"Hello there!" A shouting Pianta. . . shouts, waving its huge hand to try getting Mario's attention. The Pianta was standing on the pier next to a bolted down oversized pin that had seven ropes attached to it, these ropes led to seven colourful Bloopers that were carelessly splashing around in the water.
"Um, hi?" Mario walks over, he slipped on the pier because it wasn't actually a solid wood bridge but multiple logs floating on the water. Mario got up and slowly made his way to the solid platform the Pianta stood on.
"How's 'bout tryin' my Bloops for a run?" The Pianta asked in an overly exaggerated accent of some type.
"Your Bloops?" Mario asked eyeing the strange Bloopers that didn't look like the Bloopers native to the Mushroom Kingdom. (Reason for that being they aren't in the Mushroom Kingdom)
"Yeah! My Bloops! Want to have fun surfin' around on these good ol' Bloops! They don't bite 'cause they have no teeth!" The Pianta explains pointing a huge hand at a random 'Bloop'.
"I'm busy," Mario starts.
"Busy!" The Pianta exclaimed with an overly shocked expression, "Thou cannot be too busy for Bloop'en! What'd you doing that's so darn important?"
"I'm trying to save Delfino by collecting the Shine Sprites!" Mario angrily stated. In his opinion it was far too early for people like the one he was speaking to.
"Well I'll be darned! You be one of those 'all work and no play' sorta guys wouldn't you!" The Pianta accused.
"No bu-"
"How's 'bout its half price!" The Pianta interrupted.
"I'm busy!" Mario yelled and spun around to leave.
"Hey bud, a friend of mine got himself a shine for ya!" The Pianta shouts before Mario could leave.
"Really?" Mario asked spinning around.
"Yeah, he be willing to give it to someone who completes his Blooper Surfin' course in less than forty five seconds!"
"Where's the course?" Mario asked eagerly.
"First you'll need a Bloop, you can rent one for two hundred Doins an hour!"
"I don't have that much money!" Mario wailed.
"And that's it halved remember," The Pianta jested.
"Mario, try using your letter for free access." Mario pulled out the letter and showed it to the Pianta.
"Hey! That be my letter for the Pirate Pianta er um, Billy!" The Pianta stutters.
"He gave it to me."
"Then alrighty, just-ah take one of these fine beauties and ride 'em into that there non-sewage pipe on the other side of the bay!" The Pianta explains pointing, Mario didn't see the pipe because of all the machinery stocked up at the harbour.
"Thanks!" Mario happily shouts about to jump off the pier and onto a Blooper.
"Now hold up a sec there, I best be warning you that these ere Bloops of mine don't like people just switchen' and swappen' so whatever one you choose is stuck to ya for good. . . literally if you know what I mean," The Pianta jests giving Mario a few painful nudges to his ribcage.
"I ah, don't. . ." Mario says and waited for an explanation, he never got it so he just jumped atop of the closest Blooper, it was pink. The Blooper's eyes widened and all of its tentacles suddenly started to spin and the Blooper flew off across the water snapping the metal pin off the platform, all the Bloopers then get dragged along by the pink one.
"Mario," Emile starts but wasn't heard over Mario's screams. The seven Bloopers all catch up to Mario and bang into each other, they bounced a bit off but kept trying to get under Mario. They tried circling him but ended up getting all the ropes intertwined making a large rainbow blur that raced across the water.
"HELP! FLUDD I CAN'T CONTROL THEM!" Mario screamed.
"By using my scan visor, which was imputed with the help of Samus Aran and is thus copyrighted by her and must be mentioned every time it is used, I have came to the conclusion that these Bloopers can be controlled by tugging their ears in a certain way."
"That would help if there weren't so many of them!" Mario screamed as the rainbow-y mass of Bloopers fly (not literally) in-between two huge cranes.
"Maybe just try the middle one, the other six are surrounding it," Emile suggests. Mario grabbed its ears and tugged both of them to the left, the whole group then starts to move slightly to the left. Mario quickly tugs right to avoid smashing into a boat and with a lot of hassles makes it to the pipe. He directs the Bloopers in and they flew over a sudden drop and landed painfully onto hard ground below. This stopped the Bloopers from moving.
"Hey there mate," A Pianta who looked very much like the earlier one says, they were standing near some water.
"Um, hi? Can you help me?" Mario asked as he tried to get off the Blooper.
"Sorry there, these Bloops of mine- er of The Big Daddy won't release you until one of three criteria are met!"
"What are they?"
"Number one, the organic mass above them suddenly dies or stops breathing. Two, we cut either a chunk of you off or a chunk of them off. Three, I use some special Adhesive Glue remover to remove the oily and glue-like substance that the Blooper secretes."
"Sounds gross," Mario says watching the seven Bloopers flail about on the land.
"Since ya came all this way I bet'cha you know of my deal! Just race around this ere track and you can win yourself a Shine Sprite!" The Pianta happily announces to Mario.
"What's the track look like?" Mario asked unable to see passed the first turn because of a large wall.
"It's-ah surprise! Now it'll be cheaten' to let you be using your pump so hand it over!" The Pianta demands holding out its fat hand. Mario painfully removed FLUDD from his back and handed it to the Pianta. "Good, now when I see you make contact with the water I start timen' so be careful!"
"Alright, any charge for trying?" Mario asked making sure he wouldn't get fined.
"If you fail I have full rights to snap your neck and kill you," The Pianta says glaring at Mario. Mario made a sort of gasping noise and stared at the Pianta. "What? I have to charge some price and I don't have a permit to charge someone who uses the Bloopers," The Pianta lied.
"What if I just pay you for the Shine?" Mario suggested.
"Alright, one Billion Doins!"
"That's why too much!" Mario complained.
"The old British Billion and not the newer one," The Pianta adds.
"That's impossible for me to gain now!" Mario yelled.
"Then you best be racing," The Pianta sneered. With a few groans Mario dragged the Bloopers over to the water.
"How big is the course?" Mario asked.
"My personal best is thirteen minutes something."
"The hell am I supposed to get forty five seconds!" Mario screamed in anger.
"Don't know, cheat codes, AR, possibly clip through wall," The Pianta suggested knowing well that those things only work in games and not real life.
Mario was about to retort when a Green Blooper touched the water, suddenly a siren went off and a huge nanotechnology timer appeared in front of Mario. "AHH! Quickly! Mush mush or whatever gets you things going!" Mario shouted kicking the Bloopers, then didn't like being kicked so they tried escaping. They went into the water and all of them sped off with Mario attached to the Pink centre one.
"Five seconds wasted." Mario turns the first corner and frowned, the course was huge and relied on Nanotechnology to support floating paths. (To better visualise it picture a longer and more twisted version of the Loopdeeswoop Glalaxy's course)
The Pianta starts laughing as it watched a security screen that's showed Mario's progress. "You have the pump yet?" A young voice asked and the Pianta turned to see Bowser Junior standing atop of the originally pipe entrance.
"Yeah, catch!" The Pianta says throwing the pump up at Bowser Junior, the Koopa caught the pump and accidentally held onto a button. FLUDD then blasts a jet of water into Bowser Junior's face making him drop it in freight. (He wasn't expecting it to 'attack') FLUDD fell off the ledge and landed onto the ground, swapping heads as it did so.
"I guess it just broke," Bowser Junior says looking at the pump, he hadn't see it up close except for before and was sure it wasn't meant to look like that.
"Even if it isn't I doubt having it spray down his back would help, may as well leave it here for him if he lives," The Pianta suggested.
"Alright, looks broken enough. Remember to deactivate the bugs when he's atop them!"
"Nanobees not bugs!" Gonzalo growled angrily.
"Yeah whatever," Bowser Junior mumbled as he left.
Mario flew across the water onto a elevated path and saw a large orange box fall from the sky and land in the floating water, because it was made of something buoyant it floated atop of the water in Mario's way.
"AHH! Slow down!" Mario yelled pulling up on the Pink Blooper's ears, the Blooper jumped up and the others did so too. They jumped over the obstacle and Mario quickly steered to the right. Two more boxes awaited him so he jumped over them with relative ease. "Hey Emile, this is actually quite fun!" Mario tells his absent partner. They flew across the water and Mario frowned, the path split in two ahead of him. Mario tried steering to the right but fell off the course and landed down somewhere below. The Bloopers flew forward and smashed into a Pianta as they stood facing a wall.
"Blah!" They screamed in pain as they were crushed into the wall. The Bloopers stopped moving and the Pianta rolled over to look at Mario. "How the he-"
"Hi! Did I win?" Mario asked.
"Er uh, surprisingly. . . but you skipped the course! That's against the rules!" The Pianta yelled enraged.
"You suggested I cheat so shut up!" Mario yelled angrily.
"I was joking!" The Pianta growled, wiping some blood off of his cheek, something had made a large cut under his eye. Mario made a sort of growling noise in frustration and held his hand forward, a decently sized fireball puffed into existence.
"Shine! NOW!" Mario yelled and the Pianta whimpered.
"Alrighty! Just let me-"
"First! The adhesive stuff!"
"Anti-Adhesive stuff you should say," The Pianta corrects but quickly stood up and looked away after seeing how angry Mario was. (And how dangerously close the fireball was) They pulled something from their pocket and held it out. "Use this."
Mario took the bottle and tipped the whole thing on his overalls' pants, they seeped through the material and came out under him, the liquid removed the Blooper's slime and Mario slid off onto his face, smashing the empty bottle against his right shoulder blade.
"Here's your shine!" The Pianta growled holding it out for Mario.
"First! Emile," Mario says pointing a finger at his pump, who he thought had just been placed against a wall and not smashed against it. Mario picked up Emile and painfully stabbed it onto his back.
^Station Defrost^
Iggy watched the visual feed of Mario as he lazily sat in his 'spinny' chair. He had a bunch of Snickers wrappers laying around the ground and atop of his body.
"One more lost to him, [chews Snickers] wonder how much longer Bowser'll last till he just rampages through Delfino and takes Peachy," Iggy wonders out loud.
A/N: The end of another short chapter, but hey. At least I've updated.