Nic Cage has stolen a lot of things in his career: planes, cars, even a baby. And now he was going to steal the Declaration of Independence, As the y stodd in the bunker, Bean wqas astonished at his collection. "It's astonishing, to say the lease" said Beam. Cage had never shown the cars - not to mention the plane - to anyone other than his bitch ex wife Patricia. He wasn't sure if he could quite trust Beam with his book of secrets, but he can't worry about that at a time like this. The orphans needed them.
They hopped in the plane from Con Air. "Can you take me higher!" sang Bean, excitedly. At that moment Cage had a bad feeling. He was just recovering from a stapp infection, but that's not what it was. He had a bad feeling that something was about to happen. If only there was a word to describe it.
"So why are we stealing the Declaration? Are we selling it on the black market or something?"
"No, it's not the Emancipation Proclamation. There is a map on the Declaration which will lead us to a buried treasure."
"Buried treasure? Like pirates..."
"Sort of," Cage said, giddily. He had always considered himself a patriot of sorts, but a patriot and a pirate? Has there ever been such a character?
"Well how much booty does thar be?" Beam questioned, trying to be pirately.
"More booty than my bitch ex Patricia, I'll tell you that much" Cage said matteroffactly, more concerned with flying the plane than getting into character.
Beam knew Cage was bitter about the divorce, but he also knew how much he loved having sex with her. In fact he used to tell Beam about their role playing, often"burying" what he called "the treasure" into her "booty." He knew this meant there was an astonishing amount of treasure.
At that point, Cage noticed a change in BEam's eyes. He had seen this change before. THat time he changed his mind at Chili's. Nic had asked his friend to Chili's to go in on their 2 for $20 deal. Beam agreed to go, but after seeing the selections on the 2 for $20, changed his mind and wanted to get something else on the menu instead. IT was a minor betrayal, but a betrayal nonetheless. He had been quite attentive to detail since his work on Matchstick Men. It was betrayal he saw in his eyes, there was no doubt.
"I'm worried abotu what a taste of the treasure will do to him" Cage thought, this time not referring to his dick. He was concerned that Bean would take the treasure for himself, forsaking the poor ophans.
It was an awkward flight. They were both onto each other. Cage was onto Beam's nefarious plan. Beam was onto Cage onto his nefarious plan. If only there were a word or phrase to describe this obvious, unspoken truth. But it remained an unspoken truth as the two sat silent.
"Well HOORAH for the sounds of fucking silence!" exclaimed Beam, quoting Cage's character in the movie from which they now sit on the plane from.
"Heh, yeah..." Cage usually loved fanfare, but this time it just felt like a miserable attempt to break the silence. It was just that, that is to say, a miserable attempt to break the silence.
The plane landed in DC.
"To the white house!" said Cage, attempting to throw Beam off the trail.
"Lolz" said Beam.
It did not work. He was a fast learner indeed.
And thusly they ventured out of the plane together, once friends, now rivals.