I gently pressed my lips against the soft curls of Jasper's hair, he held perfectly still. He was struggling. After the fight I overheard between Jasper and Alice and the threat to leave him he hasn't left my side. It has been two weeks and I am inches away from forcing Emmett and Edward to take him to hunt.
"Jasper please go hunt," I said softly, "You are giving me the walking chicken leg look again," He growled softly, unwilling to leave me. It pained me that I terrified him so much, he was honestly so scared I wouldn't be here when he got back that he refused to leave. I was starting to feel so suffocated that I felt I was going insane.
Alice had barely spoken to me over the past two weeks since my birthday. Apparently she simply was trying to make Jasper jealous and steal him back but she had become such a part of the family again Carlisle and Esme hadn't the heart to throw her out again.
Jasper was a different person entirely, he was fierce. If anyone else approached me he became animalistic, snarling and holding me close. I had to beg him to let Carlisle check my bandages. When I became like them I promised myself I would be able to whack him upside the head and tell him he was being stupid.
"I am not going anywhere," He whispered gently stroking my hair.
"It has been two weeks since you hunted...kitty cat not even Carlisle goes that long," I whispered kissing his cheek, "I will have a bath now, I want you to hunt whilst I'm in there...please hunt just a little, half an hour ok?" He fixed his coal black eyes on me, looking unsure. The burning must have been unbearable by now because he hesitantly nodded. I stood up and made my way to the bathroom.
"Good," I said turning around to face him as I reached the door way, "Because I have missed you golden eyes," I allowed a smile to grace my lips as I skipped into the bathroom and turned the water onto fill the bath tub.
The Major was not a side of Jasper I was overly fond of. The fear of losing me was enough to bring him so he was just underneath the surface, fighting and waiting to be freed. The Major was what Jasper referred to the side of himself that had allowed him to fight in the newborn wars, that had allowed him to kill people and vampires. And the part of him that still wanted to drain me dry.
I relax beneath the bubbles and sighed. Half an hour free of freaking out Jasper would be pleasant. I loved Jasper and loved his company but he was scary when he was starving hungry. I allowed my eyes to shut. Emmett and Edward where in the living room, Esme and nessie in the kitchen. Bella and Rosalie had taken Alice out shopping and Carlisle was at work. Jacob had gone home last week. It was odd when my 'gift' kicked in; I guess it fired up because I wanted to be sure Jasper wasn't just waiting down the hall instead of going hunting, it kicked in because I cared about his wellbeing and the safety of our family. Although I knew he would refrain from lying to me I wouldn't put it past him with the state of mind he was in at the moment. A terrified and dangerous vampire was not the moral one.
Exactly thirty minutes later a much more relaxed Jasper opened the door holding a fluffy towel, his golden eyes shining bright.
"Feel better?" I said with a small smirk. He nodded with a smile.
"Much better," He replied. I could sense his relief at finding I was still here. I sighed slightly getting out of the bath.
"Jazzy sweetie," I said slowly, "You know I am not going to leave you, I love you so much and I couldn't cope with you not with me," I rapped my still wet arms around him. He said nothing, his eyes meeting mine.
"I was afraid that day, I wasn't thinking straight. You know how sad it made me," I whispered, "I love you, and the thought of you wanting someone else pains me, I know you love me, I do not doubt it. I just want you with me forever, me and only me,"
"Lizzie, I could never want anyone but you. I just wanted to clear things up with Alice; to show her once and for all I wanted no one but you. I know that wasn't how it sounded...but truly you are everything to me," I smiled softly and went to press my lips to his neck but he captured them passionately.
"I forgive you," I breathed minutes later. He trailed kisses across my cheek and down my neck, icy fingers caressing my back skin, gliding gracefully leaving a tingling trail behind them.
"That pleases me," He muttered huskily, the accent of his which I loved so much strong with every word. I rolled my eyes at his formality, chewing my lip slightly.
"Am I allowed out to play now...or is the Major going to hold me captive forever?" I said playfully. Jasper's body stiffened momentarily, his face void of emotion.
"I was just..." He started. I pressed a finger to his lips.
"I know sweetie...you where scared..." I whispered, "But you don't need to be, I am yours..."
Emmett was about to die a slow and very painful death.
"I CAN NOT BELIEVE YOU!" I said, my face contorted in utter disgust, "YOU ATE MY PUPPY!" Rosalie looked pale...more than usual that is. Emmett had never looked so guilty. Jasper seemed...amused yet unhappy.
"I was peckish..." Emmett said feebly, almost questioning himself as he said it, he sat on the sofa like a child being scolded by their fuming parental figure.
"SO GO HUNTING...DON'T EAT MY PETS!" I said in pure anger. Jasper physically recoiled as even I felt the wave of anger roll from my body. Emmett whimpered, cowering behind a pillow.
"I am sorry Lizzie," He again said questioningly, "I'll get you another one!" I curled my small hands into fists as they shook at my sides, my face contorting into one of rage.
"WHAT SO YOU CAN SNACK AGAIN?" I screamed, "I DON'T WANT ANOTHER ONE YOU COMPLETE AND UTTER IDIOT! I WANT MY CAIN AND YOU HAVE EATEN HIM YOU CRUEL STUPID BOY!" I turned on my heel, tears welling in my eyes. I couldn't handle my emotions anymore, I need to remove myself from the situation before Jasper latched onto my anger and released his darker side on his brother.
I sat outside on the porch steps looking up at the cloudy sky woefully. Cain had just learnt to roll over, and Jasper and I were to take him on his first walk together this afternoon and Emmett had ended it all.
I could hear Carlisle scolding Emmett from here, and Carlisle Cullen was not known for shouting but for me to hear from here...Carlisle was fuming and yelling at his son at the top of his lungs. Carlisle and Cain had had an odd relationship. Cain seemed to find Carlisle fascinating and Cain would follow him around constantly, hiding behind corners and peering round letting himself trot along behind the pale man. This amused the eldest Vampire to no end and after discovering that Cain enjoyed fetch Carlisle had spent an hour straight gently throwing the same stick for the puppy to retrieve. And now Carlisle's odd friend had been eaten...by his son.
After a week I forgave Emmett...almost.
Jasper had taken the wedding planning seriously for once. Seating plans and menus where flying left right and centre in his great hunt for the correct shade of blue.
"You know this is actually the most amusing thing I have ever seen," Said Charlotte, who had arrived minutes before to find Jasper upturning the study to find swatches of material from the napkin supplier.
"He had been looking for half an hour," I said in amazement as he pulled out a pale blue inch by inch square of material from a draw with a flourish, I big grin spreading across his perfect features. I almost cracked up with laughter but I contained it. That is until I turned and looked at Charlotte whose face had screwed up into the most bemused look in her battle to control the laughter which fought to be released. Our eyes met and the room erupted in squeals of humour, the both of rolling on the floor howling.
"I don't get it," Jasper said in utter confusion.
"Don' worry mate...i don' think we ever will," Peter said consolingly, patting his friend on the shoulder.
After two hours of wedding planning even I was bored, yet Jasper said we had to nail down the final menu.
"Jasper sweetheart...if even the BRIDE is bored of planning her wedding I think it is time to take a break," Charlotte said in exasperation. Jasper looked to me in surprise; I had my forehead resting on the table. I was almost bored to tears by this point and Peter found this unbelievably amusing.
"If the newbies from 1947 could see you now...they would thought you'd taken to batting for the other team," Peter said Jasper, "That is if they couldn't see her," He said prodding me rather sharply in the side.
"Ow bully!" I said groggily. Peter wasn't great at watching his strength, he grunted an apology.
"I am not homosexual," Jasper said pointedly.
"Well there was..." Peter started before quickly finding himself out the, thankfully open, doors to the garden with force.
"What does he mean 'there was"..." I said slowly looking up at Jasper who looked shifty. Charlotte looked as confused as I did.
"Nothing..." He said quickly before zipping around packing up the planning, that was until I heard Edward scream.
"OH MY GOD! CAN NOT UNSEE! CAN NOT UNSEE!" Jasper let out the most animalistic snarl smacking a hand harshly to his own head, I saw the skin crack like marble beneath his fingers before sealing itself. I practically leapt into Charlotte's lap out of shock, Peter laughing evilly about fifty feet away.
I was beyond confused. Edward was traumatized. Peter was amused beyond belief. And Jasper was...uncomfortable.
"When I was with Maria...i knew no better than to do whatever she said," Jasper started slowly, "Maria had been around a long time...and enjoyed...spicing up sexual encounters," I needed no further explanation.
"Ok...moving on swiftly...shall we watch a film," I said leaping out of my seat and hurrying from the room, dragging my fiancé with me as I went.
"Does it bother you?" Jasper said slowly. I let the toothbrush swing from my mouth for a moment before removing it and washing out my mouth. After watching I am Legend for what felt like the millionth time I had headed to bed.
"That Will Smith dies?" I said slowly. Jasper looked at me pointedly; he wasn't in the mood for my jokes...which was disappointing.
I sighed slowly and ran a hand through my hair.
"What you have done really doesn't bother me, if you honestly think after everything I have accepted about you with no question...this...is going to change anything you really must regret it," Jasper was quiet for a moment.
"I never...ever...want to be with ANYONE...but you, my very beautiful FEMALE fiancé, I love you darling, " He said slowly. I snorted slightly with laughter.
"I love you too kitty cat. Would you like some bleach for your mind?" I teased. He shuddered slightly resting his hand on my hips.
"I honestly don't think bleach could remove this stain from my memory," He said slowly. I smiled seductively.
"Perhaps I should take your mind off of it," I purred, pressing my lips against the coldest spot on his neck. He growled softly, fingers gently digging into my hips.
Before I could blink I was lying on my back on the bed and Jasper was on top on me removing my dress. I moaned softly as his icy lips trailed around my neck. The lust pouring off of Jasper was too much for me to bear; I arched my body towards him seeking relief for the burning desire of want. He had never been this aroused around me before, I knew we had been struggling in stopping ourselves progressing with our intimacy but it had never been this bad. I could almost sense it; tonight we wouldn't be able to stop and I didn't want it to.
Our clothes lay scattered around the room as I manoeuvred so Jasper was beneath me. Agonisingly slowly my lips trailed a meandering path along his chest, south to his aching member. Jasper snarled openly as my mouth found his manhood, dragging my tongue from base to tip, flicking it sharply twice before trailing it down to the base again. I took him deep into my throat allowing myself a moment to find a comfortable angle before beginning to move over him. The door downstairs slammed, I moaned against him causing him to jerk and my teeth to scratch against him harshly, he groaned in pleasure as I harshly bit down. I began to move my head with speed, running my tongue along him eagerly. He arched slightly, hands fisting in my hair as I proceeded faster, Jasper's eyes met mine, the gold fading fast. Blood and sex and me...everything Jasper wanted in his life at this moment.
He flipped us over head dipping between my legs, it felt so good as his icy tongue traced my sensitive skin. I screamed in pure bliss knots tying in my stomach as he dip in and out, stopping occasionally to flick his clit over my tongue. Our emotions had run away from us, toppling us both into a lustful frenzy. We wanted to feel good and we would do anything to and with each other to get it
. He kissed his way up my body, I whimpered from the lack of contact and friction. I could feel him smirk, he felt everything I did and didn't want me to release yet.
"Lizzie...i can't stop," He whispered pressing his body against mine, his lips caressing every inch of my neck leaving a trail of bruises yet to form. I could feel him against my heat; I had never wanted anything so much before in my life. I whimpered clutching at his marble skin, nails scrapping against it.
"Don't stop," I whispered, moaning in want as he grabbed my ass roughly forcing my hips to tilt upwards towards him slightly.
"What if I hurt you," He mumbled seeming dazed, yet somehow still being able to be concerned for my safety.
"Then change me," I replied crashing my lips against his, "Just try not to need to," My breathing was laboured now. I wanted him so badly and I needed to feel him inside.
"Lizzie..." He said heatedly, his lips pressed against mine muffling my whimper as he slid inside slowly.
It hurt, not as much as I expected, but it hurt all the same. The burn as he slowly forced himself inside of me was uncomfortable to say the least. I cringed slightly burying my face into his neck, trying to distract myself by nibbling his rock hard flesh. I could hear metal crumpling, I absently guessed Jasper was destroying the bed frame as a way to control himself from crushing me with the force of his hips and at the same time the urge to drain me dry. I slowly ran my tongue along his neck as soon as the pain was manageable and he moved again.
I was in pure ecstasy within seconds. His movements where painfully slow, he was terrified of breaking me, I bucked my hips against him urging on. I met his coal black eyes and for once I found them the sexiest thing I had ever seen. The thought of him turning me whilst fucking my brains out drove me towards the edge of my limit, i wanted it so badly. I could see him swallow as he pounded into me, I dug my nails into his chest around his nipples, he snarled. I could see the venom dripping from his canine teeth. His eyes looked so animalistic as he slammed into me so hard my entire body lifted from the bed. I moaned as my eyes rolled back momentarily, my body shuddering as I toppled into complete ecstasy. After a few more thrusts Jasper's body tensed before relaxing.
His arms encircled my body, face burying in my neck as he shook slightly. He withdrew, lying next to me. I met his eyes and smiled.
"I love you so much," I whispered. His dark eyes mirrored mine.
"I love you too Lizzie," He whispered back, holding me close.
I awoke seven hours later to yelling. My eyes flickered open to find myself completely alone on what remained of our bed. I looked like a human chicken hybrid, the foam from the mattress stuck out at odd angles beneath our shredded sheets and the head board could be compared to a crushed tin can.
"YOU COULD HAVE KILLED HER!" I heard Edward yell.
"YOU ARE ONE TO TALK!" Jasper snarled.
"EDWARD WILL YOU CUT IT OUT...SERIOUSLY" Bella chimed in. I groaned and sat up. I ached...i ached in places I didn't even know could ache and some that I am pretty shore shouldn't and couldn't ache but yet they did...a lot. I dragged myself out of bed and took a hot shower, leaving my adoptive family to their animated discussion about their opinions on mine and Jasper's sex life.
After half an hour I felt I could walk without serious aching I got dressed. The yelling had quietened to passionate talking and I appeared down stairs. Emmett grinned upon seeing me but I ignored him, I was not going to blush and be all shy. When he and Rosalie went at it, they were anything but shy about it.
Edward was still giving Jasper a lecture on 'safe sex' which amused me to no end. I curled up in his lap with a smile.
"I don't know what you look so happy about Lizzie...you stupid girl!" Edward spat. My left eyebrow slowly rose.
"Stupid girl? I think you seriously need to change the way you speak to me Edward Cullen, and fast!" I said sharply, "What Jasper and I do with our very PERSONAL lives is of no concern to you. Keep your opinions to yourself. You of ALL people cannot comment on anything we do," I said fiercely.
"I was married!" He said quickly.
"She was human! A piece of paper and a party doesn't change the laws of physics!" I replied cattily.
"She had you there Ed!" Emmett said with a snigger, "Any anyway it has been almost five years since Jasper had any!" Jasper gave Emmett a look and for once in his life Emmett was silent. Edward sighed.
"Look I just don't want anything to happen to you Lizzie...none of us could live with that," Edward said slowly. I shook my head.
"That does not excuse the way you spoke to me and to Jasper. You need to butt out, if we want advise we will ask...but I really don't think we will," I said resting my head against Jasper's shoulder with a smile. I was beyond content and I was more than happy to stay this way forever.