Back when they were wee lads in the shire, Merry and Pippin had many misadventures, but one stood out in their memories. It had to do with a horsewhip, a stalk of corn, and a lock of Frodo's chestnut curls.
Pippin hadn't meant to pull a handful of Frodo's hair out; it had been an accident, honestly! He'd just mistaken the fluffy locks for the wool of a sheep. And Merry had been so mad because wool was one of his fetishes, not human hair! Anyway, once they had gathered the items, the sheep had all gone to bed in the barns.
A cool, calm darkness called "night" crept over the land. It was time for the ritual. Specifically, Merry and Pippin's Before Bed ritual, which happened just after supper but before evening tea. It was also known as the Just After Supper But Before Evening Tea ritual, to be precise. They were just about to perform said ritual on the dewy hillside when the subtle sound of hairy hobbit feet met their ears. Turning, they saw Sam and Frodo approaching.
"Oh, look!" Pippin exclaimed. "Can they join?"
"Shut up, Pip. They haven't been inducted."
Sam and Frodo looked up, surprised to find their friends nude on the grass.
"Inducted into what?" Sam inquired suspiciously.
Frodo squinted and exclaimed, "Hey! Is that my hair?"
"Never you mind, Frodo." It was Merry speaking. "Would you like to be inducted into the order? All it takes is this stalk of corn and some bodily crevices."
"Is there any butter on that corn?" Sam asked hungrily.
"No, but we put some salt on it," Pippin said.
"Well, alright then." And Sam began to eat the corn off the cobb, licking and gnawing at it as the other hobbits watched.
"Suck on it, too," Merry ordered.
"And shove the end in and out of your mouth," Pippin added.
"What do I have to do?" asked Frodo, ever the curious young Halfling.
"Take this whip and use it to steal the corn from Sam."
And Merry and Pippin watched their friends and laughed because it's easy to laugh when you're lying naked together on the grass with a lock of Frodo's hair.