AN: Hello. I'm not dead yet. ;-; . But probably after my chemistry final I will. FINALLY I have this chapter down. Originally it seemed a lot more short, but it seems it got way longer that I wished xD . Next chapter is already in progress, so I shall return to my lame writting. Also, Great thanks to ''A guy'' - that's his name, for reminding me of my grammar mistakes. FF format, honestly sucks, and I wake up it eats words out of my documents. While you enjoy this new chapter, I shall review ATLEAST 3 times all of my previous chapters. No need to thank littleflower542765408 (how do you remember that name?! XD) for reviewing almost all of my chapters so far! :3. By the way let me clear the time phase for you : This fanfic had started at the beggining of summer, Lunar Revel took place somewhere between summer and autumn, and this is now in winter to spring. Hope that cleared any confusion towards the time ^^' . Until next time lovely readers ~~

The shadows of her memories chapter 5

She could remember that fatefull day. The day everything changed. The day her dreams had been smashed onto the ground by a 7 years old.

She was training outside the order, when someone she didn't knew, approached her.

''Zayenn?'' she heard the man say.

''Yes. That's my name. With what can I help you mister?'' she knew he had no bad intention whatsoever, but still she wasn't gonna show any kind of weaknesses.

''Your mother, Lady Keyan, wants you to return to your familly's quarters as soon as possbile.''

''Oh yes, I see. Tell her I'll come shortly.'' she watched the man break into a small sprint as he approached the big doors of the order. She sighed. She started picking up her equipment, and then walked to the order's doors. She pushed one open, and procedeed to walk onto the long hallways, she was so familiar with.

Soon enough, she reached her familly's quarters door. She pushed it open, and she could hear her mother whispering into the main room, but couldn't make out what it was. She made her way to the main room, pushed the door open, and she was greeted with the sight of her little sister's puffy face, and her mother calming tone, snoothing her troubled sibling.

As soon as she opened the door, Akyo's head jerked up, so her emerald green gaze, fell onto her icy one. She saw the slight fear in her sister's eyes, like a deer caught in the headlights, but that seemed to be her face every time they made eye contact lately.

She really didn't knew why. In all honesty, she loved her sister. She was a little sensitive, and could get scared easily, but she was a tender loving person, and there was probably nobody around the order, so known for their kindness.

Keyan put a reassuring hand on her younger daughter shoulder and told her:

''Come on Akyo, leave me with Zayenn alone for a while.''

She saw her sister rise from her seat slowly, and rushing for the door. As soon as it was closed, Keyan spoke to her other daughter:

''Zayenn my dear, take a seat, will you?''

Now, that meant problems, or serious talking. And she feared them both.

''What is it mother?'' she asked in a cautious voice

She saw her mother sigh. Well, that's a rare sight.

''Darling, you know that when you're going to grow, you'll have to take my job upon your shoulders, right?''

She nodded. ''Of course. And I can't wait for it!'' she said honestly.

''Since this couldn't be carried by your sister, I'll have to break the news upon you. The master and I discussed, and from somepoint, our disscusion turned into your direction, and the job you'll have to take. You know your sister is younger with only one year than you, no?

That troubled her. '' Yes.'' she said, but she could feel the fear embracing her heart. It wasn't possible...

''Well, Zayenn, you and your sister are equals in what comes for picking up my duty...''

No. This wasn't happening. No...

''And that means...''

No, make it stop. She felt the fear clenching her heart, and squeezing it. No.. Mother, don't!

''You and your sister will have to compete for taking upon my job. I'm sorry dear, but even if you were born first that doesen't means it's your right to be a shadow born.''

''NO!'' she heard herself yell. It took even Keyan back. She didn't expected her to react this badly.

''Zayenn...'' she tried to calm her boiling daughter, but to no avail.

''NO! This is MY right. I was born first! I'm older, wiser, and stronger. I'm not going to let my weak sister, take such a great responsability.''

''Darling, that's very kind but...''

''No!I wont hear another word of it. All my life I have been training for this resposabillity, this is my dream mother! And I wont let Akyo take it away!''Zayenn started shaking her head, as of waking up from this horrbile nightmare

''Zayenn...'' Keyan said in a warning voice.

''No,no,no,no!'' She kept repeating.

''That is enough young lady.'' Keyan said in a demanding tone. ''I do understand this is your dream, but that should only make you fight more for it. You and your sister will have a trial which is to take place when your sister will be 13. Until then you have plenty of time to train, but I do not want to hear another word about this subject and what it means for you and your sister.''

That stopped both the shaking, and the repeating. She really didn't liked to rise her voice to her daughters, but it had to be done.

''Listen, dear, I understand this means a lot for you, but I cannot do anything about it. You can go now.''

Zayenn turned slowly, hot tears streaming down her cheeks. She walked to the door, opened it, and then slammed it shut behind her, as she strated running to the order's door.

Keyan sighed. She really did wish there could be a way to please both of the girls, but there was nothing helping it. She just hoped Akyo would give her best, since she saw in her daughter a great potential.

Unknown to both of them, a small form stayed hidden in the shadows. She had her knees up to her face, her arms circling them, hiding her face from view. She just laid there , weeping in silence, having heard the entire disscusion between her mother and sister.

Zayenn opened her eyes, and tried to not punch something. This memory pissed her off like anything else. It was the permanent reminder of her sister's betrayal. Three more months had passed by since the Lunar Revel, and just as expected, she has rarely saw her sister all this time. It was close to the new year now, and she just stood there by her window, gazing the stars.

~(o-o)~

Akyo was getting herself ready for bed. She was fighting with her long hair, trying to hold it long enough so she could tie it in an acceptable pony tail. She was thinking about this and that, and then suddenly her mind flew to her only friend.

Things have been remotely normal between them since the Lunar Revel. Akyo still couldn't belieave she had actually found up the courage to go that friendly on Zed. And on top of that, the dream she had that night, wasn't helping her at all.

They were back on that bench, watching the fireworks. But this time, when she turned to kiss him on the cheek, he turned his head too. She hesitated for a moment, gazing into his red eyes, but then, closed the distance between them. She loved the sensation and wished it would never end. But before she could even enjoy it, she woke up, in her bed, in her room, the sun shining brightly outside her window. At first she was really dissapointed that it was all a dream, but soon, when her brain started to work properly again, in a matter of seconds, her face turned crimson red, and she shoved her face into her pillow, all flushed, even tho she was alone in her room. How, and why, in the name of the good lord, had she dreamed that? That day, she swore she wont get out of her room. She'll just waste her time, since, really, the entire order had a relaxation day after such a big event.

The next day however, she was forced to take a walk. She really was bored in her room, so she decided she'll just take a walk outside, and after, she was going to figure out what to do for the rest of the day.

Just as she turned a corridor, she was broken out of her train of toughts, as she saw somebody else walking into her direction. Zed was walking towards her, with his hands behind his head, his eyes looking down, deep in tought. It was all it took for her to become a living tomato again. Her body suddenly stopped, frozen, as she watched him, and hoped he wont see her. But it seemed fate really wanted to piss her off, as he stopped, and rised his eyes to meet hers. If it even was possible, her face turned even redder, as she took off, back into her room.

Zed for his part was confused. Why was she all that flushed again? And he saw her reaction when he looked at her, like she was embarassed by something that had connection with him. And that would mean only one thing. That his only moment of weakness had not been known only by him. Honestly, he didn't regretted one second of everything that happened that night. But he hoped that would be his little secret only. And if she really did knew what happened, he just lost a friend.

In truth, they had seen eachother, but only exchanged small glances, and for her part smiles. She really hasn't talked to him or spending time with him these past few months. As she finally managed to get her hair into a tight bun, she looked at herself in the mirror. She smiled, and decided it was time to get her pijamas. But just as soon as she opened the door of the bathroom, she heard a lot of noise coming from the hallways. She heard running footsteps, hurried voices, and a lot of movement. Why was the order so alive at this time?

Out of pure curiosity she opened the door, just as medical ninja flew by her. That meant trouble. She followed the ninja, and soon, on a hallway, a crowd had gathered around something. Medical ninjas pushed trough the crowd, and master made his way into the middle of the crowd. She too went there, but she couldn't see anything, so she started pushing her way to the middle. She wasn't prepared for what she was going to see.

Medical ninjas were bent over a person, who's white kimono, now having small spots of blood on it, looked extremely familliar. As she looked at the person, but couldn't see it's face, she started feeling extremely anxious. She felt her heart race a mile an hour, her breathing quickening. She wished, that the respective person wasn't who she tought it was, but inside her heart, she knew who it was.

As she kneeled down, she was only focused on the person on the ground. When the medical staff felt her presence, they moved, so she could see the person's face. As soon as her eyes landed onto the person's face, she let a small gasp escape her lips, her eyes wide as saucers, and the room felt extremely silent.

Keyan, laid in a pool of blood, her white kimono having a giant spot of blood on her heart's zone. There were small trails of blood on her mouth's corners, sign she had coughed blood. As she scaredly looked into her mother eyes, Keyan's eyes softly lighted, and reached her hand for her daughter's face. The medical staff retreated into the small crowd, knowing, they were too late.

Akyo was standing now by her mother side, holding her cold hand on her cheek. Keyan let a small smile grace her lips before she spoke:

''Akyo, my dear child.'' she said, her voice hoarse and weak, sign of the upcoming death.

''Mother...'' she said in a strangled tone, her voice filled with sadness.

''I'm sorry I'm leaving so soon dear...''

''Don't talk like that!'' Akyo said, closing her eyes, refusing to watch the scene. Her mother wasn't going to die before her eyes. She wasn't!

''Akyo...'' Keyan said, demanding her daughter's attention. Akyo opened her eyes, and looked into her mother's now gray eyes.

''I want you to promise me something...'' she said, before she coughed more blood, and tried to gather her last power.

''Anything, mother...''

''Promise me, you wont give up on fighting because I'm gone. You aren't alone in this world dear, and you will never be. You are strong, powerfull and wise, and I'm so sorry for not being for you there when you needed me...''

''Mother...'' Akyo said, her voice barely above a whisper.''I-I promise...'' she said, altho she could feel a knot in her troath taking form.

''I know you will...And, because I want you to know I'll always be by your side, I want you to take this...'' and she opened her other hand revealing something so precious to the small culture they had.

A necklace, having a pendant in a form of a circle, in which was a stylized ''S'' in red. The pendant itself was white, and the band was made out of black satin, having a silver lock to keep it in place. She knew this was a very important treasure, as it had been transmitted from shadow born to shadow born for generations. From shadow born to shadow born...

She looked into her mother eyes with an unbelieaving look, she couldn't be serious. Her mother only smiled weakly and gathered her last power to talk with her daughter.

''I believe in you, Akyo. I always did, and always will. Don't you ever forget that.'' and with that her eyelids fell, her hand dropping from Akyo's cheek. The silence was nerve wracking, and the great master looked with pity to the little girl. There were no sobs, no tears, nothing.

He wanted to put a conforting hand on her shoulder, but he didn't had time to. Akyo took off, running down hallways. Her mind was in a blur, she didn't knew where she was going, but her feet guided her outside the order into the forest.

Zed opened his eyes and sighed. The sky was black, and stars started to show their shiny faces onto the black infinite. He rised to his feet, but his ears picked up a rustling sound into the woods. The steps were fast, and heading his direction. He glared at the dark, challenging whoever wanted to face him. But instead, what he saw, took him completely unprepared. Akyo was leaning against a tree, panting. He couldn't see her eyes, but he was quite sure something was off. She was gathering her breath, not rising her eyes. That moment, he swore he saw blood on her hands. Just what on earth had happened?

Just as he wanted to voice his confusion, Akyo started walking towards him, her eyes still down. She stopped right in front of him, and he could now smell the blood on her.

''Akyo?'' he asked, but the girl didn't rised her eyes.

There was silence. Pure silence. The forest who seemed alive, was now completely dead. No sound whatsoever. He kept his gaze on her, hoping she would just start talking already. But instead she did something that took both of them off. She wraped her arms around his chest, letting her head rest on it. After a moment of hesitation, Zed returned the gesture, but the confusion still hanging in the air. He had to know what happened.

''Akyo, what happened?''

Silence.

He let go of her, and hold her at an arms distance, her eyes were still on the ground. He was ready to ask her a third time, but she rised her eyes, and he wasn't prepared for that. Those usually warm eyes, filled with life and emotion, were now cold and dead. He could see the shattered soul behind those irises, and that only grew his worries.

''S-she's gone...'' she said, in a strangled tone, her voice barely above a whisper.

''Who's gone?'' altho, he had an ideea of who she was talking about.

Silent tears fell from her eyes, down her cheeks. Having lived in fear of her sister, she had learn how to quell her emotions, especially her cries. She never had goten out one sound when she cried, because she knew if her sister would've heard her, she would've started to be more and more aggressive with her. Always the silent crier.

''Mother's gone...'' she finally said, her tone no longer strangled but filled with sorrow. She needed caring now, above anything else. She needed a shoulder to lean on, and try to piece back her shattered heart. And fortunatelly, the only witnes to her pain knew this was the only thing that could help her at this moment. He hugged her again, as she let her tears fall freely on her cheeks. Akyo really tried not to make a fool out of herself, but now, she was going to cry like a little kid, because her mother had just died before her eyes, and she was too weak, and too hopeless to do anything about it.

~(o-o)~

He didn't recognized her the following weeks. She wasn't energetic, optimist, and happy in general, as she used to be. No. Now, she turned to her old self, quiet, emotionless and lifeless. She was no longer smiling, her eyes no longer warm. He stopped seeing her so often around the order. She looked more like a lost ghost. And her sister wasn't far from being one herself either.

After she had calmed down, he decided to accompany her to her family's quarters. On their way, they had met the most unexpected person, Zayenn. When the two sisters met, it was that annoying silence again. Zayenn's eyes were red, sign that she cried, and her face turned from emotionless to soft in a matter of seconds. She opened her arms, and Akyo had rushed to embrace her sister, as the two tried to find comfort in eachother. He felt like a third wheel, so he decided it was best to leave. He started seeing them together more often, and always dressed in black. In truth, the entire order was grieving the loss of Lady Keyan.

There had been investigations, and from that resulted that Lady Keyan had been atatcked. She had fought her attacker, but lost in the end. The great master had visited the two girls, and told them he will not let the one who did this live. Soon, two months had passed since the incident, and the funeral took place. No words were spoken, silence filling the air. It wasn't long before only Zayenn and Akyo had remained. Zayenn was standing next to her sibling, looking with sadness at the stone which had engraved her mother's name. She approached the stone, left the flower she had and whispered something that didin't reached Akyo's ears. After that, she left.

Akyo only stared at the stone. Her brain still couldn't get used to the ideea that her mother was dead. She couldn't get her head around the fact that she wont hear her calming voice again, she wont see her warm eyes anymore. The necklace she had received from her mother, was clasped around her neck, underneath her clothes. She remembered the promise she had made. She was not going to give up. She will make her mother proud. She turned around, with a determined look on her face. If she was going to die battling her sister, then so be it. But she will not die like a coward. She was going to die fighting. For her mother.

AN: Buah~~ So long TT_TT . This was supposed to be longer, BUT, I split it because it was waaay to long. Do not worry. I'm already tiping my fingers away with the next chapter. Well, review, rating and stuff is always appreciated. Drop a review if you wouldn't mind :3 . Until next time I stop procastinating~