Chapter 12: Final heartbeats

I woke to the sunlight hitting my face, brightening the room and lighting the outside of my closed eyelids. I turned and buried my face into the cold arms that encircled me tightly. I felt his lips kissing my forehead as he hummed my lullaby. There was something not right about it though. The happiest part of it still seemed sad… like he was upset. I ordered my eyes to open so I could look at his face and see if his features held the same emotion.

"Good morning" he said softly trying to sound reassuring. I was too use to his calm façade from the past couple of months and so I instantly new for some reason this morning wasn't a good one.

"Are you okay?" I asked quietly. I felt my self esteem taking major hits as the voice inside my head started running through possibility as to what could be wrong. Was it me? Was I not good? Does he still want me now?

"Very much so. Are you?" he answered calmly but there was definitely something there. I nodded unsure of what else to say. I felt his grip on me tighten as I began to sit up, almost holding me down and against him.

"What's wrong Edward?" I asked seriously, I was on the verge of crying. I could feel the tears welling up behind my eyes and knew that at any moment they were going to break the barrier.

"Nothing"

"Then let me…" I began trying to wiggle my way out of his arms when a white feather drifted down, tickling off my nose and landing on his chest. I couldn't help but stare at the feather and wonder. When I looked up - confusion clearly coloring my features - he was looking straight into my eyes. He groaned knowing that whatever he was hiding was no longer a secret. I was still totally lost as to why a feather would float down and where it would come from. His eyes flickered to my hair as if to point something out.

Cautiously, I ran my hands through my hair and about six feathers floated down past my face. Edward completely let go of me now and fell onto his back, as I watched him I sat up and with both hands ruffled my hair. It was like being stuck in heavy snow.

"Edward, why are there feathers in my hair?" He looked so ashamed but I was just too curious.

"Because I bit the pillow" he almost growled out.

"You what?" I said turning to look at the bed for the first time which was covered in feathers from the shredded pillows. I couldn't help but laugh. That's when the headboard caught my attention. "And the…"

He interrupted "Yes I bit that as well." I couldn't help myself. I knew he was ashamed but it was possibly the funniest thing that I had ever seen.

Pushing himself up on his fore arms he looked at me as if I was crazy before joining in with the laughter, but he seemed guarded. I let myself fall on his chest and just like this morning he encircled me with his stone arms.

"What else are you hiding mister?" I asked suspiciously.

"Look at your arms" He said really quietly as I watched his face completely turn into one of pain.

As I took in the sight of my arms which were starting to come up in purple patches, I was aware that by midday I would look like someone threw ink over me.

"Ooh" was all I managed. I felt him stiffen as he began speaking.

"Bella I'm sorry I should have been more…" but I cut him off by putting a hand over his mouth.

"It didn't hurt getting them" I winked trying to lighten the mood, it didn't work. So instead I thought I would try the blatant approach. "In the few hours it will take them to really show, it wont matter. It doesn't matter." I could see him beginning to argue but I didn't want anything to ruin this perfect and final human morning. "Don't. Please" I asked as I leaned in and kissed him.

"Your not mad? At all?" He finally said when I allowed his mouth free.

"Nope" I said shaking my head. "Last night was perfect. Even this morning was. I don't want to ruin it, especially with something that was an accident and wont matter soon enough" Direct was sometimes the best way with Edward.

He just nodded "I'm sorry anyway" he whispered.

"I know. Now shut up and kiss me." I smiled at him and pulled him towards me. To my surprise he followed.

I wasn't use to him following my orders and I certainly wasn't use to no-rules. After a few more minutes of kissing, he raised his head and sighed.

"They're nearly back."

"Clothes… now" I almost fell out of the bed while Edward just sat there laughing. I gave him an evil look as I bent down to pick them up but he was already there handing them to me. "Show off"

He just laughed more and got dressed himself. We both stood at the end of the bed and looked over it. It was fair to say it was destroyed. His laughing seemed to completely stop as he took in the demolition site. Mine however seemed to only grow.

"You think this is funny?" he asked, raised eyebrows.

"Actually very funny." I said laughing and with that he swept me into his arms and threw the cover over the evidence with one hand before heading towards the bathroom door. "Where are we going?"

I didn't get a real response. Just a wink. With the turn of the lock and a twist of the shower tap, my mind was flying with thoughts of what if's. I couldn't possibly be THAT lucky… could I?

Turns out I really was the luckiest girl in the world.

It was only after, when I stumbled out of the bathroom laughing in hysterics, Edward chasing me - getting really to pounce - that I remembered the others downstairs. The laughing stopped almost immediately and my eyes grew wide. Edward straightened up and flashed to me.

"Are you okay?" I shook a no. "What's wrong?" he started to panic looking me up and down "Is it your head?" I shook another no. I couldn't speak so instead I pointed downstairs. "The floor?" he asked really confused and then we heard Emmett's loud booming laugh. "Ooh… them" I nodded a yes and Edward burst out laughing again. "Don't worry, Alice saw my plan as I made it and diverted them. They only just got back."

Alice! Alice knew? Alice saw! Oh my God! Oh crap!

"Don't worry Bella. She wont saying anything…" wrapping his arms around me, I felt the towel drop to the floor. "Shall we get dressed?" he raised his eyebrow at me, pulling a cheeky grin.

"I really don't want to" I said as I pushed away and made my way over to my bag to the draws to grab some clean clothes. Bless Esme not only had she decorated some of this place with furniture but she had taken the time fold the things I bought with Alice into three piles. Things I would wear. Things I might wear. Things I wouldn't dream of wearing. I couldn't help but laugh.

Walking down the stairs the whole family was watching me. Did they all know? I turned, mortified to Edward.

"It's not what you think love. They are all thinking about the change."

"Oh" that I could handle. Happiness flooded me as I looked at Alice and she winked, I realized that she hadn't said a word and what ever she had said had worked.

"Are you ready Bella?" Carlisle said.

"Definitely" I said thinking of the activities last night and this morning. An eternity of that. Hell yeah!

"We bought you all your favorite foods, it was Alice's idea. You wont want them after so she insisted this morning, that you have the choice of anything you want." Esme smiled up at me and I couldn't help but mouth 'thank you' to Alice.

I ate till I felt sick, which wasn't very much given that nerves were starting to kick back in, but every time I started to panic Jasper must have felt it because all it took was a kiss from Edward to calm me back down.

Alice stood suddenly and looked from me to Edward and back again. "It's time" she spoke aloud.

Edward looked down at me and I could see the pain riddle his face. "Are you sure Bella? You can say no." I smiled up at Edward and took a deep breath.

"Lets do it" I gulped and I noticed them all suddenly look more worried. "I want this." I took Edwards hand. "I'm allowed to be a little scared right?" There really was no point of trying to hide it. Jasper would sense it, Edward would read it from him and freak out. It was better to be honest.

"Depends what your scared about?" he spoke quietly, as if trying to keep it strictly between us.

"The pain" I answered immediately.

Edward nodded and a small smile crept onto his face. "Then yes."

"Where?" I asked turning to look at Carlisle. I could still feel Edwards eyes boring into my head and I could sense his extra stillness. He was worried.

"I set up a… surprise… room Bella. So that you will be surrounded by your favorite things and when you wake up you will have everything" Esme was too kind, only she would have thought about something as caring as that.

"Thank you so much" I said barely auditable. The fear was beginning to take control. If I was going to do this then it needed to happen soon. I took Edward by the hand and led him towards the stairs.

"Good luck Bella" Rosalie spoke loudly. "It will hurt but you will get through it. Try to remember that, sis." she winked and followed it with her breathtaking smile. It was the first time since that night when she had explained her past that she used a softer tone with me, that she was sincere. I nodded and smiled back.

"She tough. She can handle it, Isn't that right little sis? Besides she still wont beat me even with her newborn powers" Emmett shouted behind us and I couldn't help but laugh. I felt Edward relax slightly as he raised my hand and kissed it.

"I wont leave your side, I promise." Edward whispered as we walked into the room.

Jasper entered behind us, taking my other hand. "I can't stay for the first part Bella, but I will try afterwards to come in and see if I can lessen the pain. See you soon" he squeezed gently before turning and walking back out.

"Just us then?" I let out a shaky laugh. Both Carlisle and Edward looked at me and then to each other.

"Are you sure?" Edward asked again.

"Yes, Edward. Yes." I couldn't help but think in my head that it beat the alternative. Three days of pain or a few weeks and then death. Three days I could handle, three days then I got to keep Edward forever. It was an even trade.

"I'm sorry Bella I know you hate needles but I think if we give you enough morphine it might help with the pain." Carlisle spoke as he lifted a large syringe from the desk.

"Wait" Edward interrupted as Carlisle began to put it in. Grabbing me and holding me tightly, I could feel all his panic surfacing. "I love you" he whispered.

"I love you more." I responded as he gave me one more kiss.

"Stay with me" he said as he rested his forehead against mine. If he could cry I was certain he would have been. He gave me the crooked smile I loved as I held his face tightly between my palms.

"That's the plan" I smiled, took a deep breath and dropped my arm down for Carlisle. "I'm ready" I felt Carlisle beginning to push the needle in and I could already feel unconsciousness taking over. "See you soon" I said as I lifted my head slightly and gave Edward one final kiss before I was gone.