Well here's chapter 11. Only a little surprise in there for ya. I don't know when I'll update next but please be faithful and review.

Disc. I unfortunately do not own Ookiku Furikabutte (except for the twisted offspring I am working on that is legally different from the anime/manga characters). *sigh*

One more thing…if you see any names that don't fit, please notify me but keep reading. I may or may not have thrown in some of my Americanized character's names.

Chapter 11

The snow in the park was wet and sticky. It had warmed up today, not enough to melt the snow but enough to slick the pavement with slush. Abe watched a pack of kids have a massive eight on eight snowball fight for just over half an hour. As he gazed upon the war Abe couldn't help but remember the playful bout he had had with Mihashi only days before. This memory of the early part of the day was streaked with bitter longing and sweet joy. Abe let his memory play out in his mind's eye forgetting about the kids. This proved to be a mistake as the battle drew near the bench he was sitting on. The steely eyed teen was immediately brought back to reality when a stray shot missed its smaller target hiding behind Abe's bench and instead pummeled the catcher in the chest.

The kid who hit Abe, noticeably larger than his target, regarded the teen as part of the landscape. Instead of apologizing to him the kid reloaded and sent another volley at the other boy cowering behind the bench.

Instead of getting mad a broad smile crept across Abe's face. "Hey, you want some help?" He whispered to the kid still hiding behind the bench.

"Sure," the kid whispered back.

Abe dug his hands into the heavy powder at his feet. He formed two perfectly round snowballs and held one in each hand. After waiting for another volley Abe and the cowering kid both responded in a combined attack. On Abe's command he and his new friend both hurled snowballs at the enemy. The smaller kid's shot missed his target but ever true Abe scored a direct hit in his foe's chest.

"Hey no fair!" The bigger kid called.

"Why not?" Abe asked with real mirth in his voice. "I'm just getting even."

The boy's movement was slow and predictable. He quickly bent down, hastily made an ill-formed snowball, and threw it at Abe.

With a smile Abe held out his hand and blocked the projectile. With his free hand he snagged the other snowball he had saved and hit the kid again the chest. "You want some of this?" He taunted.

Abe caught the last twenty minutes of the snowball fight. By the war's end he was wet, exhausted, and hungry. By lunchtime Abe was cold and wet but he had more fun than he had since Saturday. The memory of Saturday weighed heavily on his heart. He was hungry but he wanted to go somewhere that wouldn't remind him of Mihashi. Abe still had no answers for his future and wanted to put off the task for as long as he could.

Clearing his mind Abe decided on where he wanted to go. He was cold so he wanted something warm; and he was starting to get hungry so some food was also in order. Bordering the park on the far edge was the start of the tourist-focused downtown. This particular section of the city was well taken care of. All the houses in the area had fresh clean paint on them. The shops were small and quaint with more of a folksy appeal than the larger chains that inhabited the rest of the city. The area was meant as a destination for shopping and culture instead of a practical place for the locals to shop. This appealing atmosphere did however draw in a large local crowd. The small cafés, while rather pricy at times, were a standard for and always filled with couples. The very edge of the downtown perimeter bordering the park was a sequence of mom-and-pop flower shops, small cafés, sweet shops, and trinket stores with local wares. In the summer the very park where Abe stood was transformed on the weekends into a bazaar of local farmers and housewives selling their goods in a farmer's market of rather epic proportions. Nobody he knew went to any other market to buy their vegetables in the summer.

But in winter with nature's icing covering everything in a swath of white the park was filled with snowmen and snowball fights, snow angels and snow forts. The patios and sidewalks facing the park was devoid of its traditional summer occupants, most of whom seeking comfort within the warm walls of the shop.

Wednesday afternoon in the middle of winter was not exactly the prime time to go on a date. As Abe neared the shops enough to see in their windows he saw that for the most part they were pretty empty. Some of the more prominent cafés had some of the lunch rush but most of the locals chose to eat at some of the cheaper chains dotting the business district of down town. The café he stopped at was not the flashiest place on the street. Compared to some of the boutiques this place was downright dank; but that was what made the food at dives like this good. Sometimes the homiest places served the best food.

It was something new. The shop was dimly lit; the lights turned down low allowing the natural sunlight to filter in through in the windows. The shop reminded Abe of his favorite Ramen shop. There were only a few tables lining the walls of the rather cramped shop. A refrigerated counter with a cash register at the far end cut through the room separating the cozy sheik customer area from the polished stainless steel bakery side. To the left was a wall with a few coolers full of various soft drinks and juice while on the right behind the counter was a large espresso machine. Abe was transfixed by the quaint bakery. The smell of coffee was thick in the air, and while Abe never really drank the stuff it would be the perfect warming pickup he needed.

The girl at the counter had a pleasant smile. "Hi welcome to Mein Koffee what can I get for you?"

Abe examined the contents of the chilled case. Tarts, kuchen, and cakes of every kind were on display showing off the brilliant and vivid colors of the berries and custard and cream. "How about one of those," Abe said gesturing at a personal sized pie filled with strawberries in an egg custard with clotted cream on top. Only then did he see the sign saying "Strawberry Delight" identifying the dish.

"Will that be all?" The cashier asked.

He thought for a second. He really wanted something warm and while Abe did not drink coffee he thought it might be a good time to try some. The list of coffee drinks was a foreign language to the catcher. "I'll try some coffee," he said, "but I have no idea what any of this means. What's a la-tea?"

"Latte," she corrected him.

"Yeah that."

She smiled. "A latte is a drink made up of steamed milk, espresso, and your choice of flavorings."

He knew two out of the three things she mentioned. "And what exactly is espresso?"

"Espresso is a…well more concentrated form of coffee. Stronger but in a smaller dosage."

It sounded good enough. He read over the list of drink specials and the list of flavorings the café offered. Some like 'Pumpkin Spice' sounded disgusting; others like 'Irish Crème' were simply a mystery to him. Since he could not imagine what anything tasted like except for the obvious flavorings such as 'Strawberry' and 'Hazelnut', Abe asked the cashier. "I'm cold, need something hot, and have no idea what I'm doing. What would you suggest?"

She thought for a moment which to Abe was a good sign. It meant that she was seriously considering everything before just throwing out a suggestion. It made him accept her decision more readily. "How about a Schmeckeldwarf?"

"Schmeck…what?"

"It's steamed milk with espresso, chocolate, mint, and topped with clotted cream."

Everything sounded good. The mint was a little dicey but she suggested it and Abe trusted her decision so he went with it. "Alright. I'll have a small one of those and the cake thing."

"Thank you," she said. "Here's your Strawberry Delight and I'll bring your drink out in a moment.

Abe paid for his rather sweet lunch and scanned the room for a preferable seat. It was slightly chilly in the café, enough for Abe to take notice even with his sweatshirt on. A seat near the windows with the mid-day sun would suffice in warming the teen up to comfortable levels.

As he scanned the room Abe saw something that simply confused him. Sitting in a corner booth well out of the way was Tajima, but he was not alone. He was sitting with a black haired girl Abe recognized as Hikari Sakura and the two looked quite comfortable enjoying the quaint, almost romantic atmosphere.

Instantly Abe regretted his decision to eat in the shop. Why Tajima was with this girl was none of Abe's business. So what if he was supposed to be gay but happened to be on a date? Tajima was his own odd, if not completely crazy character but Abe was not his keeper. The two were leaned in close talking in low voices to each other. Abe felt confident that Tajima would not be able to see him if he left quietly.

But the universe felt the need to shatter even the tiniest of his plans. The girl behind the counter was rather loud in giving Abe his drink, thanking him with more enthusiasm than was necessary before handing him his drink and lingering her hand on the mug in a way that was obvious she wanted to brush hands with him. Her flirting wasn't as ostentatious as Aizawa-chan's had been, but it was enough to make Abe take notice.

He quickly thanked the girl and had made it half way to the other side of the café when Tajima spotted his teammate. "Oi! Abe! How's it going man?"

Abe was embarrassed. Granted the shop was empty spare himself, Tajima, Hikari, and the two girls behind the counter but still, it was all in principle. A body was not supposed to shout at the top of their lungs in shop, let alone one the size of a classroom. Abe would have heard Tajima just fine if he would have simply spoken.

The catcher turned around and acted surprised as if he didn't know the third baseman was in the shop as well. "Oh hey Tajima what are you doing here?" Feeling the social pressure Abe took his food and stood over at the couple's table. As he stood there he wondered if couple was the right word for them. There were two of them and they were together at the moment.

"Take a seat Abe, come join us," Hikari beckoned.

Abe did as he was asked and sat down next to Tajima. He was closer and he would feel more awkward sitting close to a girl he didn't really know compared to the guy who had a crush on him. At least the two guys were clear about their relationship with each other. He decided to speak first to hopefully direct the conversation the way he wanted it to go. "So what are you two doing here?"

"Oh we're on a date," Tajima said nonchalantly.

Abe expected this but still he couldn't believe it, not after the smaller teen came out and confessed to Abe. Tajima being on a date with a girl was just too foreign for Abe to comprehend.

To Abe's surprise Hikari started laughing at this. "Oh Yu-chan quit kidding around."

Abe felt better now that he knew that Tajima was kidding around. The third baseman always had a smile on his face so it was hard to differentiate the truth from a joke. But if these two were not going out then what were they doing sitting in a semi-romantic café talking in rather hushed voices to each other?

"Saku-ra!" Tajima moaned stressing the third syllable turning it into a whine. "Don't call me by that stupid childhood nickname."

So these two were childhood friends. That made a little more sense but they could have chosen a different place to converse; unless they had some attachment to this place like Abe had toward Furkiawa's that is.

"No Abe, Hikari was just giving me some advice, strictly speaking."

Hikari laughed a menacing laugh. "Yeah what can I say, I always end up helping Yuichiro out with his guy troubles. He's lucky I'm such a nice cousin."

This answered a lot of questions for Abe, but also raised a few. Since he initially turned Tajima down months ago Tajima had not hit on the catcher at all. Yet he was having guy troubles of some sort that he felt he had to talk over with his cousin.

"Like what?" Abe inquired. He was curious who Tajima was infatuated with now. Plus a little bit of gossip would do a great job taking Abe's mind off of the stress he was under. Loosing himself in someone else's problems would take his mind off his own nicely.

"N-nothing, it's nothing. Nobody you would know." That told Abe that it was someone he did know.

"Aw come one Yu-chan you can tell me," Abe coaxed. He waited for Tajima either to tell him his guy problems or tell him off for using his cousin's nickname by taking a sip of his latte.

"It's nothing Abe you don't need to worry about it. You have enough on your mind."

Abe was perplexed by this answer so he inquired further. "What makes you say that?"

Tajima cocked his mouth into a half smile. "You've been different since the day after your birthday. This whole week at practice you hardly talked to anyone and took off as soon as you changed. You haven't spoken a word to Mihashi all week."

Danger flashed in Abe's mind. This was not what he needed to talk about, especially with Tajima. Abe did not know if he could trust the third baseman to keep a secret and to be honest did not know if he wanted to test the waters with something as important as this. "But that's beside the point." Abe blew off the accusation with a casual flick of his wrist. "Tell me about your guy troubles. Who is it? Is it someone on the team?"

Hikari spoke up. "I'm surprised you don't know, Abe-kun. It's –"

But she was cut off by Tajima who threw a piece of the crust of his tort at his cousin. Abe looked over once he saw the food hit the girl and caught the last glimpse of something he had never seen: a super serious death glare coming from Tajima. This was enough to quiet the giggling girl down.

As she caught her breath and regained herself a monotone melody erupted from the bag next to her. "Oh, my mobile. Hold on a second guys."

Tajima and Abe stayed quiet as the girl mumbled into her phone. After only a few seconds she hung up and looked up at the boys, an apologetic look on her face. "Sorry guys but I gotta take off; my mom needs some help at home." She bade the two boys goodbye and did the same with the two girls behind the counter, calling both of them by name before she vanished out the door.

Abe was first to break the silence. "So I didn't know that Hikari was your cousin," he commented off hand.

"Mmm," Tajima grunted in a fashion that would have suited Mihashi but never belonged on the cheerful third baseman's face. He had single handedly turned the atmosphere of the shop from that of quaint and romantic into resembling a funeral home.

This upset Abe. Something was seriously wrong with his smallest friend. "Come on Tajima, what's wrong?"

"Nothin' Abe don't worry about it."

Tajima's lie hurt to hear. "That's alright. I respect that you don't want to tell me. But just remember that I'm here if you need to talk."

The duo sat in silence. Abe couldn't think of anything he wanted to talk about so he said nothing. Instead he finished his Strawberry Delight and sipped his latte.

It didn't take Tajima long to break under the silence. When he did speak his voice was full of pain and sensitivity. "It's just that, well…" He trailed off unsure of how to continue. So he restarted. "It's just that, you see, I still care about you."

"Oh," was all Abe said. He definitely did not want to talk about this now. He had been so sure he was clear with Tajima that Abe didn't return the third baseman's feelings.

"No Abe just listen, you said you would. I care about you, I really do; and I know that you don't feel the same about me but I still want the best for you. Yet since your birthday you have been, well, devastated."

"What do you mean?" Abe lied. He knew exactly what Tajima was talking about and frankly he was more than shocked to hear that the sporadic teen with not tact had read Abe enough to figure this out.

Tajima looked at Abe. It was clear from the expression on his face that Abe's lie had as little footing as Tajima's had earlier. "Come on Abe. I'm not that stupid. When we were at your birthday party you were happy. Yet on Monday morning you looked like the walking dead. Something happened over the weekend between you and Mihashi; that much is clear." Tajima took a deep breath, obviously trying to calm himself. "But you don't trust us, your friends, enough to let us in." By the sound of Tajima's voice it was obviously he needed the calming breath. It sounded like he was barely holding back a torrent of tears himself.

Abe sat in silence. Tajima was, as astronomically unreasonable as it seemed, one hundred percent correct. The question is how Abe should handle the situation. Tajima seemed to be able to see through Abe's lies. But if Abe told Tajima the truth that he was in love with Mihashi then it would no doubt hurt the third baseman because he still loved Abe.

But did Tajima not just say that he wanted what was best for Abe? And Abe did not want Tajima in that way then surely the third baseman would understand. After all it was not like Tajima would or could tell anybody; because if he did then Abe, as spiteful as it might sound, could tell everyone Tajima's secret.

So Abe decided on the truth. He was allowed to do that under special circumstances. "Tajima, you're right." This time Abe needed the calming breath. "Something did happen between Mihashi and me."

"Did he reject you? Your confession?" Tajima inquired.

Abe's eyes opened wide. "What? What would make you…how did you…" he spluttered, barely managing coherency.

Tajima's voice was intense now. "So he didn't reject you?"

"No, but how did you know that I…him…" Abe asked.

"It's like, well, don't take this the wrong way."

"I, I wont," Abe said hesitantly.

"Well, you know I have feelings for you. And well, I watch you a lot. I see the way you interact with people. Everyone thinks that I'm just a fool and well, to be honest, I am. But I do notice things too. I've been watching you and Mihashi and the way you two interact." He smirked, breaking the tension n the air. "You love him. Hell you're pretty much obsessed with him. I bet you'd take a bullet for him if you had to."

He was right; spot on accurate. Abe did, well still does, love Mihashi and he would, if for some reason the occasion called for it, take a bullet for his friend.

The silence was all the confirmation Tajima needed. "Don't worry Abe, I wont tell anybody."

"Thanks Tajima. I just, I don't want to deal with many others commenting about this right now."

"You're secret's safe with me Abe. But please tell me one thing. I'm still curious –"

"About what?" Abe asked.

"You see Abe, I still feel terrible. I know that something happened between you two. I know it from the bottom of my heart and it kills me inside to see you hurting over him. What happened?"

Tajima had already figured out so much, so Abe decided to let it all out. He would hold nothing back. "I have known that I loved him since, well, since back in October when I got the concussion at his house. Some things happened that next day and well, he was there for me. I care about him a lot."

"What happened between you two?"

Abe dipped his head. "This past Saturday, you know after the party, I went over to my aunt and uncle's house, actually my old house, to shovel their driveway because they're out of town. Just before I left Mihashi called me wanting to hang out. He ended up coming with me and we hung out at my aunt and uncle's house for a while." Abe laughed a mirthless bark. "I actually got him to have a snowball fight with me."

"What happened next?" Tajima asked, enthralled by the story.

"He mentioned that he needed a new shirt for school so we went to the shopping district and picked up a new shirt. I suggested we hang out at the arcade for a while and he agreed; although it was obvious after we got there that he probably never had been to one before. While we were there one of Mihashi's old teammates, Mihashi said his name was Tadashi."

"One of the guys from Mihoshi? I thought they were back on good terms with Mihashi," Tajima interrupted.

"This guy wasn't from Mihoshi, at least not their high school baseball team. I had never seen him before but now I know what Mihashi had to go through. I don't think the two said more than two sentences to each other but Mihashi had totally transformed, worse than what he was in the beginning of the season. Less than a minute later he took off and I followed.

"I saw him in the park and we got to talking. There was so much I wanted to tell him but when I had the perfect chance I froze. I tell you Tajima it was the perfect mood to confess and yet, well, I couldn't say a thing. I just kept stuttering and fumbling around. At first I couldn't understand why I couldn't tell him how I felt; but soon I realized. I concluded that I'm not supposed to love him; or more precisely I'm not supposed to be happy with him. It's funny; I had envisioned myself growing up with him, the two of us together and happy. But since then I can't see it anymore. Whenever I think of my future I'm there alone.

"It's stupid isn't it? I mean so even if I could confess to him. So what? What is the chance that Mihashi likes me back? Probably zero. And let's pretend just for a moment that he was into me. Would it be good for the two of us to date? What happens if we break up? Would our feud destroy the team?" Abe scoffed at his speculations.

"Besides, Mihashi will find someone soon and he'll be happy. I bet there are some girls at Nishiura that will be more than willing to go out with him."

Tajima was silent for a few moments as he absorbed what Abe had told him. "Abe let me ask you something," he said after some consideration.

"G-go ahead," Abe beckoned. He wasn't ready for the question-and-answer phase but that is where things were going.

Tajima bore his eyes into Abe's. "I want you to tell me. Don't think about it but just tell me straight off. Are you gay?"

"No," Abe said automatically. And for the most part that was true. Abe didn't feel this way about any other guy. So Abe could admire male beauty; that didn't make him gay. And even then he never fantasized about Mihashi in a sexual way. Abe simply wanted to be with Mihashi. The pitcher was like air or food or water. He was not an option, but a need he never knew he had to satisfy. Until now.

The third baseman took a moment more to process this information. "So what would you do if you could not be with Mihashi?"

"Th-that's the thing, Tajima. I don't know. I have no idea what I would do and it's freaking me out."

"Is that why you've been out of it lately?"

"I, I don't know. I mean I want to talk to Mihashi. He's my best friend and even if I can't be with him in a relationship I still want to be friends with him. But I don't want to be a burden to him."

"Burden?" Tajima asked perplexed. "How would you be a burden?"

"I thought about it. I thought about being with him even though I couldn't be with him. I thought it would be a good idea but now, well, now it just sounds sad. Like I'm stalking him. I'd always be around him, constantly in his life. He'd get sick of me eventually, and I think he might be now so I started to distance myself away from him."

"Cold turkey with no explanation is not the greatest way to do things Abe."

"Well, I can't tell you my reasons for doing it because honestly, I don't know why myself. But it's hurting Tajima. It's hurting a lot. Yet this is bound to be my future so I might as well get use to the pain."

Tajima was serious again. "You don't have to Abe. You can find your own way without the pain."

"I've lived with this pain for so long I wouldn't know who I am without it," Abe replied morosely.

Tajima shot him a crooked smile. "Then reinvent yourself. Become someone new, someone better. Become the Takaya Abe that loves Ren Mihashi passionately with everything he has."

Abe thought about it. This sounded like something he really wanted to do. If he could reinvent who he was and change out of his crusty self-destructive self then there was no telling what the catcher could do. However there was still one problem flashing in Abe's mind. "But what about Mihashi? I don't even know if he's gay. Should I risk my friendship with him or the team's cohesion on a chance like this?"

The third baseman straightened out his crooked smile into a wide toothy grin. "You may be surprised at what you find out about him. He's a remarkable guy."

The catcher couldn't help but chuckle at both Tajima's expression and his words. "I hear ya," Abe agreed.

Abe took another sip from his now mostly finished latte and almost spilled the rest of it all over himself when three sharp rings made him jump. The LCD screen on the front of the phone told him he had a mail from his mom. He quickly read the short message and sighed. "I'm sorry Tajima, but my mom is quite curious as to where I am. Apparently I was supposed to be home so she could ask me to run a few errands for her. Now I have to do it while I'm out. I have to take off."

"No problem," Tajima said.

The taller teen stood. He put his hand on the third baseman's shoulder and said, "Thanks so much for listening Tajima. It really helped."

Tajima grabbed the hand on his shoulder with his and gave it a squeeze. "No problem Abe. And hey, I'll see you at Sakaeguchi's party on Christmas Eve?"

He smiled. "I'll see you there," Abe said and turned and left.

Author's Note: Well how did you like it? Please review what you think, even if you're ambivalent about the chapter. I'm planning the next one in my head right now but no promises as to when it will go up. This one was much longer than I planned, I had the whole Tajima thing lasting only about a page in my head. I'm currently working on novelizing this and it's going actually rather well but that is the project that has been taking up a large chunk of my time.

Take care and thanks for reading!!