A/N: This is the beginning of the end of my journey with Dickens' timeless tale. This chapter grew apace, it ended up having to be subdivided due to sheer length. I hope it is a fitting wrap up to our adventure together-you, me, Charles, and of, course, the residents of Port Charles. The words are mine, the characters and the over arcing plot, alas are not.
Christmas
He was mumbling, "I'll fix it, I promise I'll fix it…please, take me back." Then Jason eyes flared open and he was awake. Sunlight limned the blinds of his windows as he stared around the familiar confines of his bedroom dazed and uncomprehending. The room looked familiar but subtly different as though he were regarding it from a unique vantage point. Slowly as his vision sharpened, he realized he was sitting on the floor, his back propped against his bed. "What the hell?" He brought his hands up to his face, dry scrubbing his features as though he could somehow rub his brain into coherence.
He started to push himself up off the floor and grimaced in pain as every single muscle in his body united in protest against the idea of his moving. Closing his eyes, Jason summoned all his considerable force of will and ignoring his sore muscles managed to stand upright. His balance was suspect and he swayed for a moment or two until his inner ear equalized itself. Slowly, shakily, walking as though he were geriatric, he made his way toward his bureau and peered apprehensively into the mirror that hung above it.
He stared intently at his reflection surprised to find he didn't look as bad as he felt. Raising a tentative finger he gently probed at the reddish, knot-like lump that was raised on his left temple. "Ouch!" He said automatically responding to the quick burst of pain that erupted in reaction to his probing fingers. "What happened last night?" Jason asked himself in breathless wonder. He couldn't remember the last time he had gotten so plastered that he blacked out, not since he'd been in his late teens or early twenties he thought. He liked being in control way too much to ever voluntarily relinquish that power to something as pointless and insidious as alcohol.
Sighing in frustration, he turned away from the mirror. Clearly, there weren't any answers to be gleaned from staring at himself. Whatever he had done last night the information was locked somewhere within his mind, he just needed to find a way to make himself remember. For now he needed to take a piss and follow that up with a long hot shower to soothe his aching muscles.
Jason was standing under a pounding stream of water, it was hot enough to steam up the bathroom and turn his skin pink. He had found other small wounds on his body-a large bruise on his right hip, abrasions on the palms of both his hands-which he had no memory of incurring. Still, due to the ministrations of the shower his body was already less sore and more flexible as he braced himself for what he had to do next. Screwing up his eyes in unhappy anticipation he reached over and turned the hot water off. It took a few seconds and then he gasped in painful shock as he was deluged by ice cold pinpricks of water.
He knew it was necessary, the heat followed by the cold, so as to prevent further stiffening of his muscles. As he steeled himself to endure a few miserable moments of icy cold water assaulting his bare skin he abruptly recalled being cold before, being almost on the edge of hypothermia. Suddenly his mind was flooded with events, all sharp edged and chaotic. They filled his brain, taking him unawares as he sagged under the unexpected weight of them. Jason fully remembered his visitors, remembered the journeys he took, the things he had seen…
"Spinelli!" The word was ripped from his throat as agony speared through his mind when he recalled the silent pathetic corpse lying discarded like garbage in a snow covered alley.
Fumbling, his hands tremulous with fear he turned off the frigid spray of water. He blindly grabbed for his towel and incompletely dried himself. He sprinted back into the bedroom and yanking open a drawer grabbed a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. He shimmied his still wet legs into the jeans and ran for the bedroom door. He paused at the top of the stairs to put his head and arms into the t-shirt and then taking the stairs two at a time, finished pulling the shirt on as he descended.
He didn't know why he had come downstairs instead of heading down the hall to his roommate's bedroom. If forced to guess he would have claimed instinct as his rationale. Jason sagged with relief against the wall of the staircase, Spinelli was there, on the couch, asleep.
"Spinelli!" He was shaking his unresponsive, almost comatose appearing roommate, Jason had lost track of how many times he had called his name, his voice getting progressively louder as he became more and more concerned. "Wake up!" He ordered him, thoughts of alcohol poisoning and the possibility of having to call an ambulance racing through his fevered brain.
Just as he was about to give up and go in search of his cell phone to call 911, the form on the couch twitched and muttered something indistinct. "Stone Cold why are you disturbing the Jackal's rest at such an ungodly hour…"
"Spinelli," Jason's voice was hoarse as sat on the arm of the sofa, trembling while the adrenalin flowed out of his system, "I thought…well, never mind that, you need to tell me…"
Spinelli rolled over on his back groaning as the morning light assailed his eyes, his head was pounding and he placed his forearm over his vulnerable eyes in an attempt to shield them. "What information does Stone Cold require that could not wait until a more civilized hour on Christmas morn?" The words were somewhat garbled and spoken imprecisely but Jason was just grateful that his roommate was alive and cognizant.
"Then I didn't miss it!" Jason was infinitely reassured, "I still have time."
Reluctantly, Spinelli pulled himself partially upright, he sat slouched on the couch, his eyes half closed as he responded to Jason's cryptic remarks. "Miss what, Stone Cold? The Jackal's aching head must be playing havoc with his hearing as well. Why would it be of import to you that you have not missed Christmas Day? By my observations, it is an occasion of little significance in your life."
"No, you're wrong, Spinelli," Jason replied fervently, "It's a very important day, it marks the beginning of the rest of my life, of fixing things, of making things right for everybody I care about."
Spinelli's bloodshot green eyes were now wide open as he peered at his friend in stupefaction, "Have you experienced an epiphany, Stone Cold? Or perhaps your thoughts have been somewhat muddled by that evident injury on your forehead?" Spinelli gestured warily at Jason's head, concern shadowing his eyes. He was extremely unsure how to take Jason's transformed attitude about Christmas and quite possibly life in general.
Jason just stared at Spinelli for a moment without saying anything as he ran his fingers over the forgotten bump incurred when he had run face first into Carly's planter. He had temporarily forgotten about the nights' events, evidenced by all the cuts and bruises he bore as a result of his nocturnal adventures. Then he smiled broadly, an expression of pure elation spreading across his face.
He nodded his head almost bashfully at the bewildered boy sitting on the couch nursing his hangover. "That's right, Spinelli, that's exactly right. I had an epiphany and today is the day I start putting what I learned into action."
Jason stood up and crouching down by the sofa reached under it and wrapped his fingers around the empty vodka bottle tucked away out of sight. "Starting with this," he said his countenance settled back into its usual sternness as he stared grimly down at Spinelli. The hacker's face flushed red and he ducked his head miserably, refusing to meet his mentor's eyes. "We're going to talk about this later, about your need to drink every time something upsets you."
"It was just some holiday overindulgence, Stone Cold." Spinelli whispered, ashamed and frightened of what the possible consequences of his drinking binge might be.
Jason swallowed over the sudden lump that formed in his throat. He hated seeing Spinelli so pitiful but he wasn't going to risk his visions or whatever they were coming true. There was no way, as long as he had breath in his body that Spinelli was going to die of hypothermia, forgotten and destitute in some filthy alley.
"Hey," he said softly, sitting on the coffee table in front of the boy. Their knees were touching and he waited patiently, not saying another word, until Spinelli peered up at him, his face a study in contrition. "I'm not mad, I'm not." He needed Spinelli to clearly hear him, to know that he was speaking from his heart. "Well," he amended, the smallest of smiles flitting across his lips, "That's not totally right, I am really angry at myself."
"The Jackal doesn't understand," Spinelli was far too hung over to interpret subtext and all he felt was confused and scared that maybe this was it, the final transgression which had worn through his friend's indomitable patience.
"Spinelli, lately…well, usually, I don't treat you the way I should. You just accept my moods and while you always come through for me, I don't manage to do the same for you."
Jason was speaking in a somber tone while an endless set of pictures flipped through his memory as he recalled all the times Spinelli had helped him without question. He would drop everything and work his magic with his computer or more importantly just simply be there for him when he needed somebody. He had borne his temper, his despair, his fear and his unexpressed longing to have someone listen to him and even advise him. Except for the few times he was asked to do something against his conscience, he never once turned his back on his mentor.
Yet, Jason knew that he wasn't nearly as generous to the young man sitting on his couch, nursing a fierce hangover which was only the outward manifestation of the demons which haunted him. The only reason Spinelli would contend that he was, that he owed Jason so much was simply because when you come from nothing, anything, no matter how paltry, seems like almost too much. He was grateful for crumbs never once thinking he had a right to ask for the whole slice or even an entire cake. Jason gave him thin slivers of his time after his other business was concluded. After Sam, Carly, Michael, Sonny and anyone else who happened to call upon his help, his services, was satisfied. It wasn't equitable, more than that it simply wasn't right and it had taken seeing an insupportable future for him to reach that conclusion.
"Last night…" he began again.
"Last night," Spinelli interrupted him, "The Jackal was despondent. He was lonely without Maximista and it was the holidays and he unwisely imbibed too much alcohol." He stopped, his mouth was dry as cotton and his head throbbed, he added with a small groan, "Could not my physical discomfort be enough punishment for my misguided actions?" He looked at Jason, his eyes pleading, "I shall endeavor not to repeat such an ill advised lapse in behavior. Please don't make me forsake my abode, my home…"
Jason looked at him with bewilderment. "What are you talking about, Spinelli?" He was genuinely puzzled. "I would never kick you out, never." He said vehemently. "This is your home for as long as you want to stay. You're my friend, my family and I want you here. I said I was mad at me not you. Last night," this time he kept speaking, preventing any more interruptions, "All you wanted me to do was sit and watch a movie with you and I didn't because I was in a bad mood. I was unfair to you and I know that things have been rough lately and that you miss Maxie." He also knew full well that he couldn't honestly say the same for himself. "I should have stayed and spent time with you. I know that now. Hell, Spinelli, I knew it last night. Can you forgive me?" He looked appealingly at his roommate who was staring at him in open mouthed surprise.
"Me…forgive…you?" Spinelli stammered, his world had suddenly turned topsy turvy. "It was I that consumed unsanctioned alcohol, behaved in an unseemly manner and caused you untoward distress. The forgiveness ought to be in the other direction entirely."
Jason sighed, he ran his fingers through his hair and taking a deep breath tried again. He knew it was unreasonable to expect patterns of interactions established over years to change because of a single conversation. He gave brief unforeseen thanks for possessing Quartermaine genes. There wasn't a more stubborn bunch on the planet and it appeared he was going to need an unending supply of the trait coupled with persistence.
"You could have gotten ill or died, Spinelli." He said gravely as the hacker winced dismally at his uncompromising words. "What were you thinking drinking an entire bottle of vodka? I was this close to calling an ambulance this morning. Do you have any idea what it would do to me if something happened to you?" He waited for a response but once again Spinelli's head was bowed as he looked at the rug. "Will you promise me something?" Jason's voice was quiet, if he extracted this one assurance from the boy he would let him off the hook for the moment but it wasn't the end of the subject, not by a long shot.
"What?" His voice was barely audible.
"Look at me," Spinelli was used to obeying and he slowly raised his head, his eyes coated with a sheen of tears. "I want you to promise me that the next time you feel this low, when something is bothering you that you will not drink. Instead, talk to me, I'll listen. Will you do that for me?"
Spinelli looked at him incredulously, "You want me to talk to you?"
Jason gave a short little laugh, "Yeah," he said, "I know, me asking you to talk more, pretty amazing. Still, I mean it, Spinelli, I am always here for you. I may not act like it but you are very important to me and I will do everything in my power to help you. Do we have a deal?"
He held out his hand and for a moment he was concerned that Spinelli wouldn't agree. Yet, he urgently needed him to because the one thing he knew about the boy was that he didn't renege on his promises. Then tentatively Spinelli extended his hand and they shook, Jason's larger, warmer hand totally engulfing Spinelli's smaller, colder one.
"Deal," he said softly, looking Jason directly in the face.
Jason's shoulders slumped as he exhaled in relief, he hadn't been aware of how tense he was. "Good," he said simply, "Now, you stay there and I am going to fix you something to help you feel better so we can start planning Christmas."
He got up, carrying the empty vodka bottle with him, and headed for the kitchen as Spinelli's bemused voice trailed after him, "Plans for Christmas? In what alternative dimension does the Jackal find himself?" Jason snorted with sardonic amusement, if the kid only knew!
An hour later, Jason was sitting at the desk quietly scribbling notes and lists of things he wanted to accomplish for the day. Spinelli was still resting on the couch after drinking Jason's secret anti-hangover concoction, eating a banana and drinking copious amounts of water. A companionable silence reigned between them.
"Stone Cold," it was shyly spoken and Jason looked up from his planning to find Spinelli standing next to him holding out a gaily wrapped package. "Merry Christmas," he said, thrusting the package at Jason who had no choice but to accept it.
"Spinelli, I…" Jason was mentally cursing himself. He should have realized Spinelli would get him something. After all, he had every year he lived at the penthouse and every year Jason accepted the gift with bad grace because of the flash of guilt it engendered. This year though he earnestly wished he had something tangible to exchange for the solid evidence of Spinelli's thoughtfulness and caring which was weighing down his hands. "Um, I…don't…"
Have anything for you was going to be the rest of the sentence as it was each Christmas but Spinelli forestalled him. "The Jackal doesn't give gifts in order to receive the same," he chided him gently. "He wishes to share the bounty of the season and to perhaps bring some small measure of joy to others and with that be wholly content."
Suitably chastened, Jason proceeded to open the carefully wrapped present determined to show appropriate gratitude though he seldom received anything that excited much interest in him. Jason's material wants were few and far between in addition to being immeasurably prosaic.
The wrapping was removed revealing a rectangular box showing a picture frame on the cover. "Ah, thanks, Spinelli," Jason was quite relieved, it was a utilitarian gift. "I'll find a good picture to put in here and put it up on the mantel."
Spinelli gave him a quizzical look, looking momentarily mystified, and then a broad, impish grin crossed his face as he recognized his mentor's complete lack of comprehension about the gift. "No, no Stone Cold, tis not an old fashioned frame meant to hold but one trifling picture at a time. Indeed, this is a cutting edge technological marvel of its ilk not yet available to the general public. It has the capacity to hold eight gigabytes of memory which makes it suitable for showing films if that were your inclination. Still, the Jackal stayed within the more traditional constraints…" Spinelli observed Jason's glazed expression as he belatedly understood that Jason had most likely stopped following his explanation somewhere around the word technological. "Here, Stone Cold," he said relenting, "Allow me to demonstrate."
He took the unopened package from Jason's unresisting hands and lifting the lid pulled out a sleek looking picture frame edged in a shiny charcoal grey material. Spinelli placed it on the desk in front of Jason and flicked a switch. Jason stared mesmerized as a smiling picture of Emily materialized and then after a moment it just as unexpectedly changed into a picture of Morgan, Michael and Josslyn all wearing Santa hats. Jason watched enthralled as picture after picture unfolded on the screen. All the people most precious in his life were represented-Sam, Carly, Michael, Morgan, Josslyn, Sonny, Robin and Patrick, Emma, Alan, Monica, Lila, Emily and even Edward. In some cases the pictures spanned time, Michael and Morgan as babies and as they were now or he and Carly when they were young and carefree as he had witnessed just last night. There were countless pictures of individuals and of groups. They streamed seamlessly one into the other without chronology, without pattern and Jason was fully captivated. It was the single best present he had ever received.
Jason simply sat in contented silence watching the photographs flow and transform, minutes passed and he had yet to see a repeated image. Still, there was something bothering him and he couldn't quite place what was disturbing him but whatever it was wouldn't stop nagging at his mind.
"Stone Cold?" Spinelli broke into his concentration as he attempted to determine what was off about the picture show. He was holding up a tiny device. "This is an additional memory card that has pictures of the Maternal One and young Cameron and Jacob Martin. The Jackal realizes that you would only wish to peruse these pictures privately and not have them on public display. Thus, he created a separate storage system."
Jason absentmindedly took the proffered memory card, having only half heard what Spinelli was saying but it was enough of a catalyst to slot everything into place in his own memory. "Wait a minute!" He almost shouted the words, startling Spinelli. "How could you?" Jason was furious, this was simply more of the same and he wasn't going to endorse it any longer not after what he had seen last night.
"How could I do what?" Spinelli was taken aback by Jason's outburst.
He had been so pleased at the reception of his gift. He believed that for the first time in their relationship he had perhaps found the perfect blend of sentimentality and practicality to offer his mentor. At first it appeared as though Jason agreed with Spinelli's evaluation of the present but now he was angry and Spinelli possessed no clue as to why.
"This is an amazing gift, Spinelli." Jason was working hard at reining in his temper because he knew his roommate had no idea why he was so upset. "All these pictures, it must have taken you so much time and effort to collect them from everyone and compile them and transfer them but I have to return it to you." Suiting his action to his words he reached over and after fumbling around the back of the frame for a few seconds found the switch and turned it off. The screen abruptly went dark.
"Give it back?" Spinelli felt like crying. It was far worse to have the gift be temporarily received graciously and then thrown unceremoniously back in his face then if Jason had been disdainful of it from the start. "What is the problem, Stone Cold?" He asked hoping maybe there was some technical glitch he hadn't observed and could easily remedy.
"It is incomplete," Jason said looking straight in the eyes, puzzled green meeting resolute blue.
"Incomplete…I don't… the Jackal …that is, what is missing?" Spinelli stammered. He had been so careful to include everyone that Jason cared about and to even safely relegate Elizabeth and her boys to the secondary memory card for the sake of security.
"My family is incomplete and until that is fixed I won't accept it." Jason was holding the frame out to Spinelli who reluctantly took it, his eyes downcast and his hands trembling.
"Your family?" Spinelli echoed, racking his brain as he tried to think what egregious error he had committed, whom he had forgotten to include in the pictures. "Could Stone Cold enlighten his grasshopper as to who is missing so he can rectify the situation?" Spinelli asked timidly, unable to come up with a name on his own.
"You, Spinelli," Jason said with gentle sadness, "You are missing."
Spinelli gaped at him in confusion, "Me?" He repeated in a befuddled tone, "Why ought the Jackal be included in the pantheon of those connected to Stone Cold by either ties of blood or years of acquaintanceship and love?"
Spinelli's response was to be expected because Jason tardily recognized that he was responsible for not adequately communicating his feelings for the younger man. In the beginning, when Spinelli was first thrust upon him as an unsought roommate, they hadn't comprised much more than an exasperated irritation. Gradually they altered to a grudging respect tinged with a bewildered bemusement at having this uniquely awkward creature in his charge. Then finally, without his awareness, they changed to affection and really, were he to be candid with himself, a forthright love. Yet, the problem was that Spinelli had no inkling of this emotional metamorphosis. Jason's outward demeanor toward the hacker showed little material change over time and Spinelli's consistent lack of self-esteem made him ill equipped to read his mentor's true feelings toward himself.
"Spinelli," Jason tried again to get through to him, "You've lived with me for over three years now. I have come to rely on you, to depend on you not just for your computer skills but for your insight and morality. Sometimes you were the only person I could talk to about so many things. You still are somebody that I trust completely, who I am so proud of and believe in and care about. You are more my family than most people who are actually related to me and in my heart there is no distinction between you or Michael or Jake or Morgan or anyone I love."
Spinelli just stood there looking at him, virtually speechless which was the best illustration of his depth of wonder. Jason laughed as he pointed to the forgotten frame in Spinelli's hands. "So, as soon as you put some pictures of yourself in there, I'd appreciate my picture frame back. Also, Spinelli, I'd like it best if you would put in some photos of yourself as child like you did for Morgan and Michael."
"Stone Cold wishes to peruse photographs of the Jackal in his younger days?" Spinelli's voice was little more than a rough croak as he continued to stare at Jason in disbelief.
"Yeah," Jason said softly, his eyes surprisingly tender, "I want to know what you looked like as a baby, as a toddler, in grade school, high school. I missed all those years and it's impossible to fix that but I would at least like to have some pictures of those times to help make up for it."
Reluctantly, Spinelli nodded, his expression dazed. "Of course, if that is what Stone Cold wishes the Jackal will venture to see if his Granny has any such mementos in her possession. Unfortunately, picture taking wasn't an activity often indulged in our house."
Jason flashed him a brief smile, simply glad that Spinelli had finally agreed to his request. "Do the best you can. Meanwhile, might I ask you another favor?" He turned back to the desk and picked up the lists he had been compiling while Spinelli recovered from his hangover.
"Stone Cold knows he need not even ask, the Jackal is perennially at his service." Spinelli was eager to get away from the disturbing minefield of talking about his place in Jason's life.
Jason nodded gratefully, "You are always there for me when I need you and I value that." Starting today, as much as it pained him to be all touchy feely, he was going to start making such things crystal clear to the hacker. "Anyway," he continued, wanting to get back to a less emotionally fraught subject himself, "I want to throw a Christmas party this afternoon at Kelly's and I need your help to make sure it all goes smoothly."
Once more, Spinelli stared at him his eyes wide with astonishment, "A Christmas party, you say? Stone Cold wishes to host a holiday get together?" He actually tilted his head and shook it as though checking his hearing.
Jason glowered at him, irritated with his overly dramatic attitude. "Yeah, Spinelli, I want to have a party for my friends and family. Will you help me?"
Spinelli looked remorseful as he saw that Jason wasn't playing some peculiar practical joke on him. " Absolutely, what would you have your grasshopper do to prepare for the festivities?"
Jason reached behind him for the papers lying on the desk. "Okay, well I was wondering if you would mind going to Kelly's and checking in with Mike. I know it's Christmas Day but I was hoping he'd do this as a favor for me. Also, you can tell him that Sonny and all his grandkids are probably going to be there so it isn't like he'll be missing out spending the holiday with them."
"Check, the Jackal will ascertain whether or not Kelly's is the feasible locale for Stone Cold's most unexpected upsurge of seasonal goodwill."
"Are you going to make a crack about how not me this is every time I open my mouth?" Jason asked him grumpily.
Spinelli shook his head, holding his hands out in front of him in mock fear, "No, no Stone Cold, the Jackal's ad hoc commentary on Stone Cold's agreeable but very out of character behavior shall be discontinued as of now." He mimed zipping his lips.
Jason just grunted but his lips twitched ever so slightly. "Okay, now this," he handed Spinelli one of the sheets of paper he'd been working on, "Is a list of people I want to ask to the party. I was wondering if you could go around and invite them and anyone else you want to ask as well. Just be sure to let Mike know about how many people to expect."
"Most assuredly, consider it done." Spinelli said cheerfully, "Might I inquire as to what you shall be doing as the Jackal scurries about Port Charles spreading Christmas cheer?"
"There are some people I need to talk to and invite personally and…well, some other things I need to do. The party is going to start at four pm. Maybe you could go back to Kelly's and help Mike with anything he needs."
Spinelli was already at the closet picking out one of his innumerable jackets. He turned back to Jason as he was leaving, "I shall see you anon, Stone Cold."
Jason nodded his agreement and just as the door was closing, he called out, "Hey, Spinelli?"
The hacker poked his head back into the room, "Did the Master forget some pertinent instruction for his grasshopper?"
Jason shook his head, "No, I just wanted to say thanks, Spinelli and uh, Merry Christmas!"
Spinelli stared at him with a slight return of his earlier consternation. It was obvious that it would take him a while to get used to the changes in his roommate's personality. Still, it was entirely understandable because Jason himself wasn't quite sure how long it would be before he got used to acting this way himself
Spinelli smiled at him, his eyes shining with something indefinable, "You are very welcome and Merry Christmas to you as well, Stone Cold."
Jason hesitated outside the French doors, he looked around the familiar patio which he had visited three times the night before but unlike his final trip, this time he was fully dressed and wearing his boots. He could have gone through the front door, pushing the doorbell like any other visitor but somehow this approach seemed right. He thought both Emily and Alan would approve. Taking a deep breath he pulled open the doors and stepped into the room.
It took a moment for his presence to register with the inhabitants of the living room but when it did their reactions were as predictable as though they were reading an invisible script. Edward recovered from his surprise first and grumbled to the room at large, "Arrogant pup, doesn't come around for months on end. He could be dead for all we know and then when he does show up, he comes in like he owns the place!"
Tracy stared at him coolly over a tall glass filled with an orange liquid which might conceivably have been orange juice but that Jason would have bet with anyone around naïve enough to take him up on it that it was a mimosa. "Well, well the miscreants are arriving early today."
"Speak for yourself, wife," Luke sauntered into the room and coming up behind Tracy gave her a quick peck on the cheek. "Some of us miscreants were up all night sampling the special delights on offer." He growled roguishly at her and she scowled at him before taking a large sip of her drink to cover her pleased smile. "Hey, Jason," Luke said offhandedly as he poured himself a large scotch, "What brings you here, man?"
Jason and Edward spoke simultaneously. "Must you persist in drinking my twenty-five year old scotch like it is soda pop? It isn't even eleven o'clock in the morning." The old man complained while Jason said, "I came to see Monica, is she here?"
At that very moment Monica walked into the living room, speaking to Alice, "We'll ask everybody what they want on their pizzas and then you can call the…Jason!" She exclaimed with pleasure as she darted across the room to greet him.
He surprised her by stepping forward and gathering her into his arms hugged her tightly, "Merry Christmas!" He whispered to her, his voice catching unexpectedly.
"Merry Christmas, Jason," she replied her cheeks tinted pink with joy at the unanticipated appearance of her only surviving child. For the first time in decades Monica was the first one to step back from the embrace as she looked up at him with mild wonder, "It's like a miracle." She said softly reaching up a cautious hand to pat his cheek and stared wide eyed when Jason didn't reject or react negatively to the caress but actually smiled at her. "First the gift came yesterday and now you're actually here. This is the best Christmas in years."
Tracy rolled her eyes, "Oh for God's sake, Monica!" she said brusquely, "He's a mob enforcer for Sonny Corinthos not some sort of visiting angel."
"He's my son, Tracy," Monica retorted hotly, "And as such is welcome in my house anytime."
Hoping to pre-empt any further continuation of the endless squabbling between the two, Jason asked Monica, "Gift? What gift?"
She smiled at him and turning pointed at the mantelpiece. Sitting there in pride of place, cycling through photograph after photograph was another picture frame, a twin to the one Spinelli gave Jason. Naturally, many of the pictures contained with this frame were different than those in Jason's but there were also quite a few duplicates as well. Emily, Alan, Monica, Michael, Lila, Edward and especially Jason himself, were all amply represented. Several of the pictures of Jason were ones he didn't recognize from when he was much younger-a teenager, a school boy, a toddler and an infant. Though there were a fair number of more recent ones included as well.
"Honestly, Jason," Monica said as she avidly watched the ever flowing montage of Quartermaine pictures, "How on earth did you manage to find all those photographs? Some of them I haven't seen in years and others I never even knew existed." She tilted her head to look up at him, her cheeks still flushed with happiness at his presence in her living room, her eyes shining like stars.
He stared down at Monica needing to correct her misapprehension about who the present was truly from. "Spinelli…" he started to say when he noticed Alice standing by the doors to the room frantically signaling to him. She was waving her arms to get his attention and shaking her head vehemently all the while mouthing the word 'no'.
"What's the matter with you, woman?" Edward had caught sight of her contortions, "Are you having some type of fit?" He asked irritably.
"Alice?" Monica questioned, swinging around and looking at the maid with alarm. "Are you all right?" She examined her with a critical eye, her doctor persona moving swiftly to the fore.
Alice gave a shaky little laugh as she fanned her face with her hand, "Nothing to worry about, Dr. Quartermaine, just a little hot flash."
"Oh, for Heaven's sake!" Edward exclaimed, turning beet red as he shook his newspaper out angrily and took cover behind it, "Can we kindly not have such talk in this house on Christmas Day?"
"Sorry, Mr. Q," Alice said with easy going repentance now that the secret behind the frame was safe.
"You were saying about, Spinelli? Monica prompted Jason, her attention no longer diverted by Alice's mini-crisis.
Jason was silent as he pondered his response. He perceived what Spinelli had known all along that while the gift was definitely appreciated, it was in fact more the idea that Jason had thought about them with regard to it that Monica and Edward truly valued. He couldn't take away their uncomplicated enjoyment in the present. Anyway, he knew Spinelli wouldn't desire the credit for it. "Um, Spinelli uploaded all the pictures into the frame since I didn't know how to do that."
Monica nodded her head, beaming cheerfully, "Yes, he delivered the present to us yesterday afternoon. He told us specifically how much thought and time you had put into finding just the right thing and that is certainly true. It's an absolutely marvelous gift, Jason and I'll treasure it."
Edward had come up next to the two of them and said gruffly, "Yes, my boy, it was very thoughtful of you to make your mother and myself so happy. Maybe there's hope for you yet!"
"I am glad you like it," He said simply. "Actually though the main reason I came over was to invite you to a party Spinelli and I are hosting at Kelly's this afternoon. I know it's short notice but I was hoping you could come."
"A party!" Tracy gave a hoot of disbelieving laughter, "The thug is throwing a Christmas party, will wonders never cease? I suppose the invitation says something like bullet proof vests are optional!"
"You and Luke are invited as well, Tracy," Jason said coldly refusing to respond to her mocking comment. "Actually, Luke I think Spinelli will probably invite Lulu and Ethan is certainly welcome to come along also."
"We'd love to come, Jason," Monica said, she truly couldn't remember a better Christmas in recent memory.
"Hmmph," Edward said grudgingly, "I suppose we could show up for a while. Though you're just lucky we didn't have any other more pressing plans, young man."
"Sounds good," Luke said easily, saluting him with his scotch glass.
"Wait just a minute!" Tracy was indignant, "Don't I get any say in the matter?"
"Certainly, my sweets," Luke said smoothly, "You can stay sulking here in this mausoleum and eat luke-warm pizza or you can come out and celebrate the day with everyone else like a human being. Anyway, Edward and I are going, isn't that right Eddie?" Luke patted him on the back causing the older man to swat cantankerously at him with the rolled up newspaper he held in his hand.
Jason took the beginning of an additional round of bickering as his cue to leave. He gave Monica another brief smile. "Well, we look forward to seeing whoever decides to come this afternoon. Merry Christmas, everyone."
Tracy's high pitched querulous voice followed him, "I suppose it doesn't matter to you that most likely while we're all singing 'Frosty the Snowman' there will probably be a hail of bullets from some type of mob hit or war or something?"
Luke's ironic drawl answered her, "Sounds exciting, you know how gunfire turns me on."
Alice was holding the front door open for Jason, he stopped and whispered to her, "Thanks for helping Spinelli out with the pictures."
She blushed, "It was my pleasure, Mr. Jason. Dr. Quartermaine really loved your gift."
Jason scratched his head, uncomfortable with the unearned credit. "Alice, please come this afternoon. I know Spinelli would be thrilled to see you, he's a big fan of 'The Dominator'"
Alice smiled at him widely and inclined her head graciously, "Thank you for the invitation, I'd like that very much. It will make a change from spending the day trapped here with them." She grinned at him conspiratorially, adding, "That Spinelli, he's a good boy."
Jason nodded his head, his eyes warm with pride, "Yes, he is, the best."
Jason was ushered into Sonny's living room by Milo; Max was off for the day with Diane Miller. They were two of the people on Spinelli's list to find and invite to the party. Sonny was standing by his very large Christmas tree, a glass of scotch in his hand and a melancholy expression on his face.
When Jason was announced he smiled broadly and after placing his drink on the coffee table stepped forward to greet his friend, "Merry Christmas, Jason! Can I get you a drink to celebrate the day?"
"No, thanks," Jason replied eying Sonny's own drink.
His thoughts turned briefly to Spinelli and he pondered whether it might not be a good idea for him to not drink around him at least for a while. He was determined to make sure there would be no more episodes of him consuming an entire bottle of alcohol because he was depressed or stressed. If leading by example would help then Jason was more than willing to do that.
"What brings you here?" Sonny interrupted his reverie, "Not that I'm not glad to see you, it was a little lonely here since all the kids are with their moms. Still, you usually don't get around on Christmas."
Jason smiled wryly, "You're right, I usually stay hidden in the penthouse until it's all over but I'm changing how I'm doing things this year-Christmas…and other things as well."
"Other things?" Sonny prompted him, his face serious as he recognized Jason was talking about the real reason for his visit.
Jason inclined his head as he acknowledged how well Sonny knew him by correctly guessing the reason he had come to his house. "Yeah, Sonny, I owe it to you to tell you first since you're the one it most directly impacts." He hesitated for a moment and then continued, "I'm quitting." The words were stark and unadorned and Jason wanted them to be that way so as there could be no misunderstanding his intent.
Even so, Sonny cocked his head and looked at Jason quizzically, his expression uncomprehending. "Quitting?" He repeated, "Haven't we already talked about this? You want to hand over the enforcer duties to other people-Max, Dominic, Johnny maybe," Sonny said the last name resentfully, his distaste and distrust of his former business competitor and current romantic rival clearly communicated. He shrugged indifferently as he bent over and retrieving his drink, took a long swallow of the amber liquid. "You know I don't like it but I agreed for Michael's sake."
Jason shook his head, feeling exasperated as he watched Sonny try and play mind games with him by willfully misinterpreting what he had just said. "That was before, Sonny. Back then, I was still intending to be in the business but not now, not anymore. I can't have anything to do with it. I need to get out, make a clean break."
Sonny's face contorted, he was plainly upset. "Don't talk foolishness, Jason. You know that's not possible. It's too dangerous to just up and quit and besides I need you, I rely on you."
"I'm sorry, Sonny, my mind's made up. I know there might be problems and that people might think they can come after me to settle old scores. I can take care of myself though. I won't go looking for trouble but I'm not going to run away from it if it comes. I don't have a choice, I have to do this."
Sonny was frustrated that Jason was ignoring his desires and opinions on the issue. "What happened to cause you to make such a life altering decision?" If he understood exactly why he was leaving the business it would be easier to talk him out of such a rash action.
Jason shook his head, "It's complicated and not something I really can talk about. I have to get out of the business-for myself but most of all for Michael. I can't continue to exist in some sort of grey area of being in the mob but not being an enforcer and expect that Michael can appreciate the difference. I have to make a clean break, show him that there are other options out there." Jason paused, he looked at Sonny, he knew what he was about to say was unlikely to sway his old friend but he had to try. "I wish you could think about it as well, Sonny. It's only something half accomplished if I leave and you stay. Michael looks up to you, whatever you do he wants to emulate. If you became a legitimate businessman like you tried to do before, that would go a long way toward convincing him that this isn't the only life there is for him."
Sonny looked uncomfortable, he gave a little half laugh, "Jason, Jason, I can't do that. You're right, I did try to get out, I really did. It didn't work though. Claudia tried to kill me and ended up hurting Michael instead. Besides, I don't know how to do anything else. This line of work, I'm good at it, I've done it my whole life. I was miserable when I was just running the coffee business full time. You know that." He looked appealingly at Jason, needing him to understand his viewpoint, to endorse his decision.
Jason sighed, "I know, Sonny," he said with quiet disappointment, "You need to make your own resolution, your own choices. I respect that, just like I need you to respect my decision."
Sonny gave him a lopsided grin, his dimples flashing briefly, "I do, Jason. I wish it could be otherwise but you need to follow your own path I guess." He added, his voice sorrowful, "I kind of always thought we'd be partners forever. There isn't anyone else I can rely on or trust like you, Jason. I'll miss you."
"I'll miss you too, Sonny but it's not the end of our friendship just our business association." Jason paused, there was still something else he needed to say, to make crystal clear to Sonny and he knew it wasn't necessarily going to be easy. "Look, Sonny about Michael…"
At the repeated mention of his elder son's name, Sonny's gaze sharpened, he was no longer waxing nostalgic about his and Jason's historic partnership. "What about Michael?" He asked, his tone defensive.
"Just this," Jason's demeanor had altered, he was now all business, "There is no possibility of him joining the organization or following in your footsteps. It's nonnegotiable, Carly and I are agreed about this." He looked defiantly at Sonny, daring him to disagree with him, with them.
Sonny surprised him, his eyes were melancholy, "I entirely agree," he said, "None of my children are ever going to be associated with the business. It may do for me but not for them. I want better for them." A part of him was offended that Jason and Carly could even doubt his intentions on this vital point. He might not be the world's best father but he would never wish the life he lived, a life of violence and uncertainty, on any of his children.
"Then a united front?" Jason clarified, relieved that he didn't have to fight Sonny on this because he would have. It was too important to let old patterns of obedience or acquiescence rule the day.
"Yeah," Sonny grinned at him, "A united front. Hey," he asked, his curiosity aroused, "What are you planning to do if you leave?" He still wasn't sure he believed Jason would actually follow through and permanently leave the organization. He hadn't really ever known any other life anymore than Sonny had.
"If they'll have me, I want to join McCall and Jackal. It will allow me to keep my hand in. I'd still be doing similar stuff to what I did in the business just a little more legitimately and with fewer people trying to kill me and vice versa."
Sonny gave a derisive snort, "Oh, yeah that will keep you occupied, hanging around with the kiddy crowd! I give you three months top and you'll be back. I'll make sure to keep your spot open."
Jason sighed, he knew that the only way to convince Sonny of the irrevocable nature of his intentions was to show him. When enough time had passed without him asking to rejoin the organization he figured Sonny would eventually accept the change in the status of their relationship. Their connection would change from primarily being business partners to simply being long term friends who would meet at Carly's when some family occasion demanded both their attendance.
Jason felt a slight twinge of sadness at the thought of the inevitable loss of intimacy between the two of them. Sonny wouldn't be able to discuss the business with him any longer while Jason would be focused on other, hopefully more lawful, pursuits. Yet, his true sorrow was that he hadn't been able to convince Sonny to at least consider leaving the business himself. He wondered if at some point in his life, Sonny had been visited by spirits who gave him the opportunity to amend his own future or if he simply relied on his relationship with the Catholic Church to protect his soul from the threat of damnation. Jason would never know the answer and he recognized that all he could hope to do now was control his own destiny.
It was past time for Jason to go, he had several other stops to make. "Sonny, I…well Spinelli and I, are throwing a Christmas party this afternoon at Kelly's. I hope you can come. Carly and the kids and Alexis and the girls are invited and of course Mike will be there. It will be a chance for you to spend the holiday with your family."
Sonny stared at him stunned, "You, Jason? You're hosting a Christmas party? Now I've heard everything. Did that geek talk you into it?"
Jason flushed, his eyes glittering angrily as he responded to the slight against Spinelli. "No, it was my idea but if you can't be civil to Spinelli then don't bother coming at all, Sonny. It's Christmas-you know peace on earth, goodwill to men."
"Okay, okay," Sonny capitulated, he realized they would never agree on the topic of the computer hacker. Part of him was jealous that Jason was choosing him and Sam over his oldest friend, his mentor. Yet, there was no point in antagonizing Jason, he was the most stubborn person Sonny knew. "I'll be there and I promise to be on my best behavior." He gave Jason a cocky grin as he drained the remnants of alcohol from the glass in his hand. "By the way," he called after Jason's retreating back, "In the interest of fostering goodwill with women, I'm going to invite Olivia Falconeri as my guest if that's all right."
Jason nodded his head and kept walking. His mind was already on the other people he needed to see before the party.
A/N: Reviews are appreciated